Receive With The Restart
by WinterWaters98
Summary: It's been six years since Isobelle Malfoy met her mother, Hermione Granger. Things seem to finally be falling into place, until Rose and Scorpius ask her a question she isn't prepared to answer. Can she use her own life to justify her parents' actions? (Sequel to 'To Be A Malfoy', but can possibly be read alone!)
1. Here Instead of Home

**(J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!)**

***Super-Duper shout out to ****SiriuslyPink****, who gave me the awesome idea for this chapter!**

***The title of this story comes from the song 'Roll Away Your Stone' by Mmford and Sons! Check it out!**

* * *

The summer air warms my face and makes me push up the sleeves of my robes as I stand on Platform Nine and Three-Quarters, waiting for my brother and sister to arrive. They've finally completed their first year at Hogwarts, and I've never missed them so much. My heart catches as the Scarlet Red train rolls to a halt. My youngest sister, Nina, squeezes my hand. Her blue eyes twinkle with excitement. They're the eyes of her father. "Belly, where are they?" she questions, standing on her tiptoes and looking through the crowd.

"They'll be here soon," I assure her, searching for them myself.

"Look, some kids are getting off," My other brother, Hugo says. Some students are coming off the train with luggage, greeting the parents that they haven't seen in months. "I don't see them."

"There!" Nina squeals, her pigtails bobbing up and down. "Scorpius! Rose!"

"I don't think they can hear you," I tell Nina. "The platform in so loud." After scanning the crowd for a minute, I see a head of platinum-blond hair that can't belong to anyone other than my brother. He's accompanied by a head of curly brown hair identical to mine, but with the slightest hint of red in it. It's my sister, Rose. They're speaking with Al, one of Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny's sons. Rose notices us first. She jostles Scorpius' shoulder, making him turn around. They both say a hurried goodbye to Al and take off in our direction, dragging their trunks behind them.

"Belle!" Rose says happily, giving me a hug. "We missed you all! Hi, Hugo, hi Nina," she adds. Nina can't decide which of her siblings she wants to hug first, so she tries to wrap her arms around both Scorpius and Rose at the same time. Scorpius smirks at her.

"I hope you bothered Hugo and Isobelle a lot for us," he says.

"Oh, she did," I assure Scorpius. "Give me a hug, you git." I pull my younger brother close to me. "Merlin, you're getting tall."

"Where are Mum and Dad?" Rose asks.

"At work. They're sorry they couldn't make it," I tell them. "But they're coming home early. How did Teddy do his first year?" I question. From the smile that Rose and Scorpius share, I can tell that they quite enjoyed having Teddy as one of their professors. Last summer, Teddy accepted the position as Transfiguration professor. He'd been nervous about it for months.

"Brilliant!" Rose answers. "Scorpius and I had that class together. I'm sure we were his favorites, even though he didn't say so."

"What color was his hair?" Hugo questions. "It wasn't turquoise, was it?"

Scorpius shakes his head. "No, it was just boring brown. But once, a kid in our class lit something on fire and it went yellow!"

Rose nods. "No one knew why, though. Except for me and Scorpius."

"You can't tell anyone, remember?" I remind them. "I'm sure Teddy doesn't want to begin taking requests."

Rose and Scorpius nod. "Yeah."

"How about we get home? I'm sure Mum and Dad can't wait to see you."

* * *

"Rose, Scorpius, your father and I have missed you so much!" Mum cries, pulling them into a hug.

"You saw us for Easter, Mum," Scorpius reminds her, pulling away. At the ripe old age of twelve, Scorpius believes he's much too mature to receive hugs from Mum, even in the safety of our home.

"That was a whole two months ago! You look so different!"

"I grew half an inch," Rose mutters. They've both seemed so distant from Mum and Dad since we got home, but I decide not to say anything.

"You're nearly taller than Isobelle," Dad observes.

"_I'm _nearly taller than Isobelle!" Hugo points out.

"I'm not!" says Nina. And that is why she's currently my favorite.

"You two must be starving," Mum says. "Come into the dining room, dinner is ready!" We follow Mum into the dining room, and dinner is already on the table. Mum insists on doing all the cooking, even though we have house-elves for that. Now, even though she doesn't exactly agree with keeping them, she lets them help with the laundry and cleaning, since there's a lot to be done.

"So, how did you enjoy your first year?" Mum asks, after everyone is seated.

"It was great, Mum," Rose answers, moving her food around her plate with her fork.

"Yeah," Scorpius agrees. "I actually think I'm going to _miss_ school."

"The library was amazing like you said. And Belle, Holden was right. The Ravenclaw common room is like heaven! There are books, and journals, and things _everywhere_." At first, Rose and Scorpius were extremely upset that they weren't sorted into the same house. I think it was better that way, though, because they spent nearly every waking moment together while they were at home.

"How was Slytherin House, Scorpius?" Dad questions. Dad was extremely proud when he learned that Scorpius was put into to Slytherin. I guess he has to keep the Malfoy tradition going.

"Awesome, Dad. I stayed away from Goyle like you said. He was a right git. Al and I think it's because he's so jealous that he's such stupid brute."

"Scorpius, don't be mean," Mum chastises gently.

"But, you say that we shouldn't tell lies," Scorpius points out.

Dad raises his eyebrows. "He has you there, Hermione." Mum ignores Dad.

"I don't care however he acts. You've been raised better than to name-call, haven't you?"

I can tell Scorpius is inwardly rolling his eyes. "Yes, Mum. I have."

"He _is_ quite thick, though," Rose adds, agreeing with Scorpius. "And he eats like a troll. Like _you, _Hugo." Rose smirks at Hugo's indignant look.

"I don't eat like a troll! I've got a knife and fork."

"It's the fact that you rarely use them that's causing the problem," I inform Hugo.

He frowns at me. "Hey!" he complains. Nina giggles.

"So, what are the two of you going to do on your first day back in the real world?" I ask, making conversation.

"The Falcons are playing the Arrows tomorrow," Scorpius informs me. He has to be one of their hands-down biggest fans. "Dad owled and told me he got the tickets last month. He's taking Hugo and I."

"_You're_ going to see the Falcons play tomorrow?" I question, unable to take the amused tone out of my voice. Hugo nods.

"Yeah, maybe they'll get beat," He says hopefully. Scorpius turns to face him.

"Hugo, have you gone bonkers?" He questions. "The Falcons _can't _be beat!"

"It's the truth," Dad agrees. "Seven Cups in a row, going on eight."

"Well, wouldn't that mean they were beat eight years ago, if they didn't win the cup then?" Rose points out.

"Who cares about seven years ago?" Scorpius questions, waving his hand.

"Who cares about quidditch, period?" Rose retorts. "It's a completely mindless and barbaric sport." I have to agree with her there.

"What would you know about quidditch, Rose? You can't even fly two feet on a broom without sliding off the end." You can't speak badly about quidditch in front of Scorpius and expect him not to say anything. My family and I look on. We've seen this argument between Rose and Scorpius occur numerous times. Quidditch is one of the only things they disagree about.

"That's because I spend my time worrying about more important things, Scorpius. That's why my marks are higher than yours," Rose smugly informs him. Scorpius narrows his storm grey eyes at her.

"Just barely. You get an Outstanding in Charms and start thinking you're a genius…" he mutters bitterly.

"For your information, I've always thought that," Rose says. Mum shakes her head.

"Merlin, the house has been quiet without the two of you," she tells them.

"Quiet_er_," Dad corrects. "It's never completely quiet." He's right. It's become some sort of unwritten rule that at any given time, one Weasley-Malfoy child must be screaming. Said child is generally Nina.

"And now I have someone to play dress-up with!" Nina muses excitedly, grinning at Rose and showing a gap where a tooth should be. It reminds me of Scorpius a while ago, when he was missing his two front teeth. He couldn't pronounce my name correctly for months.

"Didn't you have Belle?" Rose questions.

"You haven't seen how ridiculous I look in a fairy-princess tutu," I tell her.

"Better than Hugo," Nina says nonchalantly, shrugging.

Hugo's face turns beet-red as Scorpius bursts into laughter. "That was only one time!" He protests.

"Don't share that with anyone else," Scorpius advises, holding his stomach.

"Yeah, Prince Hugo!" Rose adds, smiling herself.

"You two, don't be mean to Hugo," I say, frowning at them both. "Besides, it's _princess_ Hugoto you lot." Nina, Rose, and Scorpius all burst out into more laughter. Even Dad hides a smile.

"Isobelle, don't make fun of your brother like that," Mum says disapprovingly. She's such a bloody killjoy.

"He knows I'm joking. Don't you, Hugo?" Hugo crosses his arms and turns away from me.

"Don't talk to me," he mutters. Oh, well. I tried.

Everyone settles into a conversation, listening to Nina talk about something, I'm not sure what. I notice that Scorpius and Rose seem the most disinterested out of everyone. They don't really speak unless Mum or Dad asks them a question, and even then their answers become rather short. I find that odd, because they seemed perfectly happy to see me. I wonder what's wrong.

* * *

After dinner, I go up to my bedroom. Watching Nina and Hugo all day is a great way to lose all of my energy, especially dealing with Nina. It's been a while since I've had to deal with the unwavering energy of a six-year-old. Now that Scorpius and Rose are out of school, I'm sure that things are only going to grow more hectic.

I'm startled by a knock at the door. "Come in." the door opens and Rose walks in, followed by a sullen-looking Scorpius. They both sit gingerly on the edge of my bed. "What's wrong?" I ask. Rose and Scorpius share a look, as if they've talked this over quite a few times.

"Where are our parents?" Rose asks quietly, looking me straight in the eye. I'm caught completely off-guard by the question.

"Downstairs… in their bedroom, I don't know…" I answer, shrugging. Scorpius rolls his eyes.

"She means our _real_ parents," he clarifies. The temperature in the room seems to plummet.

"Real parents?" I repeat, utterly confused. They can't be asking what I think. Rose and Scorpius nod.

"Draco isn't my real Dad," says Rose.

"And Hermione isn't my real Mum," Scorpius adds. How can they believe that? Mum and Dad have been in their lives longer than their _actual_ parent. Why would they want anything different?

"Mum and Dad are perfect parents to you," I tell them both. "Is that not enough for you?

"But they aren't _our_ parents," Rose points out. "Me and Scorpius think it's only fair for you to tell us who they are."

"Well, maybe you should ask Mum and Dad. It's not my job to tell you that," I say, ready to shoo my siblings out of my room. They've probably had this planned all year, to ask me who their mother and father are, as if I was going to just easily tell them. I didn't even know Rose's father too well, and Scorpius doesn't deserve to know what kind of person Astoria was. At least not yet.

"You know Mum and Dad won't tell us," Scorpius says lamely.

"Perhaps they have a good reason," I tell them both. "Does Hugo feel this way, too?" I ask. Rose shakes her head.

"No, he doesn't ask at all. I don't think he remembers our dad, much," she answers. Hugo was only three when his dad left, so it probably doesn't bother him as much as it does Rose.

"Maybe you should follow his lead," I suggest. Scorpius frowns at me.

"You know that's not fair. _You_ always wanted to know who your Mum was," he points out. "It's the same thing." I don't feel comfortable being attacked by both Rose and Scorpius at once about this. It only makes me wonder, how long have they wanted to know?

"It's not the same thing. I never knew Mum. You've both known your parents," I inform them.

"But that was so long ago," Rose insists. "We may as well have never met them."

"And it's not fair that you and Nina get to live with _both_ your parents," Scorpius complains. Little do Scorpius and Rose know, only half of that sentence is true. Nina is more Rose's sister than she is mine. And besides, I've lived with both Scorpius' parents longer than he's been alive. I think he can return the favor.

"Scorpius, I'm sorry. You, too, Rose. But you really are better off," I assure them. Neither of them seems to be placated in the slightest. "Things like this are difficult. You can't just ask to see your parent, and they show up in your life as if nothing's ever happened. Trust me, it doesn't work that way at all." I can tell them that first-hand. After I met Mum, I wasn't sure for a while that having her in my life was actually what I wanted. Now, I wouldn't take it back for anything.

"But what if things work out good like they did for you?" Rose questions.

"Things like this don't happen twice," I say quickly. I'm not sure if that's true or not, but they don't have to know.

Rose and Scorpius both give me sad looks. "Could you at least talk to Mum and…_ Dad_ for us?" Rose asks hesitantly. I don't know how Mum and Dad are going to take something like that, but I'm sure they're a bit used to it.

"I'll ask, but I'm not in control of whatever they say. And if they say no, that's _final_, got it?" I ask Rose and Scorpius. They nod quickly.

"Thanks, Isobelle," Scorpius tells me. Even though I don't agree with either of them wanting to meet their parents, I do feel some sympathy for them. I know what they're going through, and it's difficult. At least their step-parent accepts them, though. I glance at the clock.

"You're welcome. I'm sure Hugo and Nina would like to spend some time with the two of you," I say, giving each of my siblings a hug before they turn to leave. "Rose, will you hand me my cloak?" I question, pointing to the hook beside my door.

Rose wrinkles her eyebrows. "Where are you going?" she questions, handing it over.

"Holden's," I answer nonchalantly, tugging on my cloak.

"This late at night? Do Mum and Dad know?" Scorpius asks, raising his eyebrows and sharing a suggestive look with Rose. Merlin, they're so immature.

"I'm an adult, you nasty little twits. I can leave when I want. That's one of the perks of being the oldest."

"Along with babysitting, right?" Rose smirks. I roll my eyes. Even though having four siblings can be exhausting, I wouldn't trade them for the world.

"Oh, you know it. Now get your skinny bums out of here."

* * *

**(A/N: Thank you all for reading! I really am more satisfied with this chapter! I'm sorry for putting you all through all that, and I will FOR SURE continue this fic! However, I would definitely like some reviews! Oh, and I started a new fic called ****'Breaking Ties'****, it's a Dramione, and I think it's going to be really fun to write! So**_** PLEASE **_**check it out and tell me what you think! I hope you guys can make this story and that one as big as TBAM! Thanks, my lovely readers!**


	2. Age Has Never Made Me Wise

**0*J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!)**

***Title of this chapter comes from 'Nothing left to say' by the Imagine Dragons. If it's not obvious, they're me favorite band (even since before 'TPOBAW', which is amazing!)**

***Oh, and the title of last chapter came from 'My Fault' by the Imagine Dragons! Give them both a listen :)**

_***Leave a review! ;) **_

* * *

My eyes open slowly and I yawn. I lay there for a moment, listening to Holden's steady heartbeat. I take in the feeling of his arm around me. He begins to rouse as well.

"Morning, beautiful…" Holden smiles lazily, his eyes clouded with sleep. He kisses the top of my hair, which I'm sure must look an absolute fright.

"You weren't supposed to let me fall asleep," I remind him.

After a little while, Holden frowns slightly. "I wasn't?" he questions. I shake my head. "Sorry…"

"My parents are going to murder me. I have to go."

"Belle, you're a grown woman. You can go home when you want to," Holden tells me, nuzzling my neck. "Besides, I need someone to keep the bed warm." One of his hands snakes its way up the side of my leg.

"Stop…" I mutter, even though I can't bring myself to put any feeling into my voice. "I'm leaving…" I make to get up but Holden stops me, walking his hands up my bare back.

"Don't go," he pleads, setting me with a pouty, blue-eyed gaze. "I don't have to be to work until later." How can I refuse him?

"I suppose I could stay a _few_ more minutes," I say, letting Holden win. "Even though minutes always somehow manage to turn into hours with you."

Holden smirks at me. "I'm just that good, aren't I?"

I roll my eyes. "That wasn't what I meant. You just never let me get around to leaving," I clarify.

"Well, maybe I don't want you to leave," Holden tells me, bringing up a conversation we've had numerous times. His lips graze my ear. "Move in with me, Belle…"

His warm breath makes my skin prickle. "Holden, you know that I want to, but things just aren't right for that right now," I tell him. "My parents need help with Nina and Hugo." This isn't the sole reason, but it's at least one.

"But you're always complaining about how you want to move out," Holden points out. That _is _true.

"I know. But sometimes things bother you, but you don't really care enough to do something about it. Like the leaky faucet in the bathroom," I tell Holden, smirking. "You haven't fixed _that _yet."

"Teddy promised to take a look at it this weekend," Holden tells me indignantly.

"You said that two weekends ago. You're really wasting a lot of water like that," I inform him.

Holden frowns. "Are we really discussing leaky faucets right now?"

I nod. "I think we are. How stupid is that?" Holden messes with a tendril of my hair, wrapping the curls around his finger.

"Very," Holden agrees. "Hey, Rose and Scorpius came back home last night, didn't they?"

"Yeah. I swear, I don't know what's changed them so much. They came home last night asking me about their _Mum and Dad_," I tell Holden. His eyebrows furrow. He's probably just as confused about it as I am. He's known Rose longer than I have, and he gets along with Scorpius to some extent. They just never seemed discontent with their situation, which makes me wonder why they'd question it.

"They did?" He asks, sounding surprised. "What'd they say?"

"Well, they told me about how it isn't fair that they don't know their _real_ parents, and that we don't ever talk about them," I explain.

"And what do you think?" Holden questions, as rubs a steady circle on my shoulder.

I shrug. "You know I'm biased," I reminding him of my situation.

"To which side?"

"I don't know. You know how I felt about not knowing Mum, and I understand where they're coming from. But at the same time, the fact that I _do_ know their parents, Astoria especially, makes me not want to let Scorpius and Rose get to know them. And I know that if I tell them that I think it's better they don't, they'll hate me." Holden notices my troubled look and pulls me closer to him.

"Don't beat yourself up," he tells me quietly. "You're just trying to protect them."

"I know that. But I know they won't understand," I mutter, a troubled look crossing my face.

"Did you understand it?"

I shake my head. "No, and I was _fourteen. _I know it's going to be more difficult for them. And they want me to ask Mum and Dad for them, and I have no idea what either of them are going to think. Maybe I'm just worrying too much. Am I?" Instead of a response, I feel Holden's lips on mine.

"You _always_ worry too much," he tells me, smiling against my lips. Holden kisses me once more, deeper this time, and I feel his hands beginning to roam.

"No, not right now…" I mutter, pulling away from him. "I really- oh, _Merlin_- I really need to be home." Holden gives me a slightly annoyed look, removing his lips from my neck.

"I'm kind of busy," he mutters. "But, if you absolutely must interrupt me…"

"I must. Hand me a shirt, will you?" I question, unable to find my clothes. They must have gotten lost in our haste last night. Holden reluctantly hands me a shirt of his, and I get out of bed to put it on. I notice him staring at me. "What?" I ask.

"You're so beautiful," he tells me, smiling slightly. I feel myself blush. It's been years, yet I still feel a bit uncomfortable around him sometimes. "Come back to bed?"

"Flattery gets you nowhere," I inform Holden, rolling my eyes. "Do you mind if I use your shower?"

Holden shakes his head. "Not if I can join you," he answers. That randy git

"Forget I even asked. I'll just shower when I get home." At least that way, I can do it by myself.

Holden frowns at me. "You aren't being any fun," he complains.

"I'm sorry," I sigh. "You know I have a lot on my mind right now."

"You weren't thinking about it last night…" Holden reminds me. I play with the silver necklace around my neck. Holden and Teddy got it for me on my fifteenth birthday. I've worn it since.

"Just because I don't say anything about it doesn't mean I'm not thinking of it," I inform Holden bitterly. "How can I not think about something like this?"

"I don't know. Tell Scorpius and Rose what you told me," he suggests.

"I couldn't possibly. I promised them that I would tell Mum and Dad how they felt. They're counting on me to do that." Holden doesn't say anything for a long while. I expect he's thinking of something to say to make me feel better. I can always count on him for that.

"I need coffee," he realizes. Merlin, I swear he can be so thick sometimes. Yet, I still love him. "Want some?"

"Sure…" I mutter. Holden slides on some pants and gets up. I follow him into the kitchen. "Really, it's almost ten. I'm sure everyone's wondering where the hell I am."

"You sound so eager to leave," Holden mutters sarcastically. "Y'know, you wouldn't have to if-"

"Holden, why do you want me to move in with you so bad? You see me nearly every day," I question. "Are you afraid of living alone?"

Holden rolls his eyes at the teasing look I give him. Until September, he and Teddy used to share this flat. Then was when Teddy got his job at Hogwarts. "Yes, I'm _terribly_ afraid of the dark. Keep me company?" He offers, handing me a coffee mug.

"I'm sure a quick _lumos_ would help you there," I tell Holden unsympathetically.

"But what about when I get lonely?" he questions, pouting like a little boy.

"I'm sure you can invite Teddy over."

"Belle, you know I can't do those kinds of things with Teddy…" Holden murmurs.

"What kinds of things?" I ask, playing dumb. "Enlighten me." Holden leans down to whisper in my ear. Each word he says makes my face turn a deeper shade of red.

"Now you understand, don't you?" He asks, taking in my shocked look with a smirk.

I nod slowly. "Completely. I'm sure Teddy would never look at you the same if you did _that_ with him," I agree.

"So, how about it?" Holden asks again.

I sigh. "I can't," I answer. "Really, I can't."

"'Can't' implies a physical inability," Holden says mindfully, sitting down at the kitchen table.

"You know what I mean. I would like to, but I can't."

"Why not?" Holden questions, looking at me with interest. I'm not sure how to answer him. I have many reasons as to why I will not move in with Holden.

"It really would be too much of a hassle," I lie. "And then, what if something happens, and we aren't-"

"Together anymore?" Holden questions, looking at me like I'm a madwoman. I'm too ashamed to let him know that I think that way sometimes, so I don't say anything. My silence is answer enough.

"Er…"

"Come here," Holden says, pulling me onto his lap. "Isobelle Malfoy, you must be as insane as you think you are if you have it in your head that I'm ever going to break up with you," Holden tells me. He kisses my forehead, and I can't help but smile. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Besides, I'm really not too keen on putting seven entire years of dealing with you to waste," Holden says playfully. I hit him on the shoulder.

"Generally, Holden, when people get older, they _mature,"_ I inform him, rolling my eyes. Holden smirks at me.

"We can't both be boring," he protests.

"I am not boring," I assure Holden. He raises his eyebrows as if he disagrees.

"_Oooh_, yoooou're _nooot_ _baw_-ring?" He questions, drawing out his words dramatically, barely able to contain his laughter. To him, my accent is absolutely amusing. Holden is Scottish, and even though his parents have spent a ton of time in England, they both have thick Scottish accents. Holden and his sister have them as well.

"Don't make fun of my voice," I complain. "I can't help how I sound."

"I'm not making fun of it, I'm admiring it. Your accent's incredibly sexy, you know. Just like everything else about you," Holden tells me, giving me that look of his that drives me mad.

"I'm English, _you're_ the one with the accent," I point out, smiling.

"Oh, whatever. Details, details." I pick up Holden's hand, glancing at the watch on his wrist.

"It's nearly ten-thirty," I tell him. "I really need to go home ,after I shower, and Merlin, my clothes," I remember, putting my hand to my forehead. Holden's eyes widen.

"It's _that_ late?" He asks. I nod. "I have to be to work!"

"You were just harping on me about wanting to leave," I say, raising my eyebrows at Holden. "And look who's late."

"_I_ am!" Holden realizes, standing up. Only too late does he realize that I was still sitting on him. I tumble off his lab on land on my bum.

"_Ow!" _I complain.

"Sorry," Holden apologizes quickly. "Er, Belle, d'you mind? I kind of need to shower." Holden says, helping me up.

"Not at all. I'll just find my clothes and leave you to get ready," I answer, rubbing the bruise that I'm sure is going to form on my bum.

"I think they're under the bed," Holden tells me thoughtfully. He gives me a quick kiss. "Good luck with your parents. See you later?"

I nod. "Yeah, of course."

* * *

I try to tiptoe as silently as I can past the living room, doing my best to make it to my room without being seen. "Daddy, Belly's home!" Nina announces loudly, pointing to me. I stop in my tracks and curse under my breath. Can I not go unnoticed for just _one_ day of my life? Dad turns around from the sofa to look at me. He doesn't appear to be pleased.

"Where have you been?" He questions, gesturing to the pair of shoes in my hand. I glance at my flats and think of pulling a quick _'Oh, how did those get there?'_ but decide against it.

"I went out this morning," I lie quickly. Dad wrinkles his eyebrows at me. I'm a terrible liar.

"Really? I didn't see you at all last night after dinner. Hermione, did you see Isobelle last night?" Mum shakes her head. Rose and Scorpius both give me knowing looks, but they don't say anything.

"That's because I went to bed early," I say. "Ask Rose and Scorpius, they saw me last night." I ever-so-subtly widen my eyes at my siblings, instructing them to come to my defense.

"Oh, yeah, Belle was really tired," Rose says, nudging Scorpius' shoulder. She needs to take a lesson in subtlety.

"Yep, what Rose said. We actually went to tell her goodnight, and she was half passed out," Scorpius adds.

"At seven o'clock?" Dad asks, giving the three of us dubious looks. I nod.

"I really was beat yesterday," I inform my parents. "I'm sorry if you worried about me. I think I'm just going to shower now."

Dad narrows his eyes at me. "You didn't shower this morning before you went out?" Damn.

"Course, I did. I just meant that I needed to, er…shower again. You can never be too clean," I inform my parents. Mum gives me an extremely strange look.

"Rose, Scorpius, how about you take Nina and Hugo outside for a bit? It's nice out," Dad suggests. I sigh. Whenever Dad wants my younger siblings out of the room, it means that an argument is about to ensue. Scorpius and Rose stand reluctantly, giving me sympathetic looks over their shoulders.

"Let's go fly or brooms something," Scorpius suggests, much to Rose's dismay, as he opens the back door. As soon as they're a safe distance away and the door is closed, Dad turns to me.

"Isobelle, do you care to explain to me where you were?" he questions.

I shake my head. "Not particularly."

"_Isobelle,"_ Mum chastises. "Your father asked you a question."

"I answered him," I mutter, turning around. "The two of you are always in my business."

"Because you still live in _my_ house," Dad points out. He acts as if I so desperately want to be here for the rest of my life. I don't

"Either way, I'm twenty-one, not twelve," I remind him.

"You seem to forget that," Dad retorts. How can he say that? I haven't done anything irresponsible in such a long while, that he can't even hold it against me.

"What the hell are you talking about? I'm here when you need me to be!" I argue, glaring at Dad. "I don't have to tell you every time I step foot outside the Manor!"

"Don't yell at your father," Mum says calmly. "He's right. It isn't too much to ask that if you're going to be gone for the night, you at least tell us where you're going to be."

"No one even said-"

"Are we still keeping this going, Isobelle?" Dad asks exasperatedly. I'm not the one choosing to have this conversation.

"Fine, I went out last night. You're treating me as if I _snuck_ out, when I have the perfect liberty to do whatever I want and _leave_ whenever I want," I remind Dad. Why do he and Mum insist on treating me like I'm Hugo's age, or even Nina's?

"No, you _can't!_ If _you're_ running off in the middle of the night doing Merlin knows what, next Scorpius and Rose are going to believe it's completely acceptable to do such things!" Dad tells me.

I roll my eyes. That's complete bullshit. "Scorpius and Rose are _twelve._ Where are they even going to go?" I question.

"Where did _you_ go?" Dad retorts.

"I don't have to tell you!"

"Isobelle, your father and I aren't asking anymore. You're to tell us," Mum orders, growing impatient. I don't see what they're so bent out of shape about._ I'm_ the one being interrogated.

"Fine, I spent the night at Holden's. Are the two of you happy now?" I glower at my overly-inquisitive parents. Mum doesn't seem too happy about this, but Dad seems far more upset than she does.

"You did_ what_?" He demands, sounding outraged.

"I said I spent the night at Holden's," I repeat. "He wants me to move in with him." I didn't originally plan on mentioning it, but I knew it would bother Dad.

"There is no way in hell you're living with a man you aren't even _married_ to," Dad assures me. "You can go ahead and get that thought out of your head right now. It's bad enough you're sleeping with him."

I frown at Dad, utterly disgusted that he would even mention such a thing. "How do you even know?" I question, utterly annoyed.

"Must I remind you of how many times your mother and I have caught you and Holden inside our home?" He questions. A part of me wants to answer yes, just to irk him even more.

"Fine, keep me prisoner in here.. Neither of you are helping anyone anything."

Mum frowns at me. "What are you talking about?" How the hell can she be so bloody oblivious?

"You and Dad are all but _forcing _me to stay here!"

"Isobelle, you know it isn't anywhere near fair of me to let you move out. Holden would be taking care of you for the rest of his life!" Dad argues. Mum gives him a scathing look.

"_Draco!" _She hisses, as if she's doing a great job of protecting me.

"Hermione, if Isobelle wants to argue, then I'm at least going to be realistic with her about it. Isobelle, what can you do for yourself?" Dad questions, tilting his head to the side as if we're having a casual conversation about the weather.

I feel my face flush with rage. "Holden wouldn't have to take care of me! And even if he did, he'd still love me! That's what you fail to understand, and I honestly don't see how you can criticize my behavior so much! _You _made me this way!" I shout. Both of my parents regard me as if I'm absolutely mad.

"Isobelle, please calm down," Mum says.

"How can you expect me to be calm? Do you _hear_ Dad?" I question, staring at her. Then I realize why she's being so quiet. "You agree with him, don't you?"

Mum opens her mouth to say something, and then closes it. "Well, I… I'm not saying that you and Holden aren't …. Look, I just want you to be mindful of what you're doing, alright?" Mum asks, giving me a wary look. Who the hell is she talking to?

"You're telling _me_ to watch what I do? I don't have a child I should have been taking care of, unlike _you_ did at my age! Your children don't even know who their father is, and Scorpius doesn't know his mother! When Nina finds out what the two of you did, she's going to _hate_ you both! And you want to call _me_ irresponsible?" I scream, waving my hands madly about.

In an instant, Dad is up on his feet. "Don't you _ever_ raise your voice to your mother like that again!" He roars. "You honestly believe you can do anything for yourself with that kind of attitude? Nina behaves more maturely than you do!"

"Well, I can damned well see why! She's had two parents to raise her the right way! Pity they aren't _both_ hers, isn't it?" I question, narrowing my eyes. Words cannot describe the look on Dad's face after those words leave my mouth.

"Isobelle, I swear to _Merlin_ if you weren't my daughter, I would-"

"Draco, calm down!" Mum says hurriedly, stepping between us. She gives Dad a look. "It's early, and Isobelle hasn't yet taken her calming draught. So, Isobelle, why don't you go do that, and then when you come back, we can discuss this like adults?" She suggests. How can Mum be serious? She's just going to blame this on me not having already taken my calming draught, instead of actually listening to me?

I shake my head. "Forget it," I say, turning to retreat upstairs. "It doesn't matter. But you aren't helping any of them, keeping their parents away." That wasn't how I meant to tell either of my parents about what Rose and Scorpius said, but I suppose it'll have to do. I really have to work on holding my tongue when I get upset. Then again, I can't forget who my father is.

* * *

Mum glances at me briefly, until she notices that I'm looking at her as well. "Do you want to say something?" I ask, not to be rude, but out of curiosity. Mum purses her lips.

"I'm sorry about this morning," she apologizes.

I shrug. I'm used to getting into arguments with Dad. When I was about fifteen, we had a calm couple of years, and then we began to drift apart again. I think it's because I never fully got over all of my resentment toward him and Mum, and now that I want nothing more than freedom, being so close to him only reminds me of that. "It doesn't matter," I mutter, leafing through a book. "I was planning on going to Flourish and Blotts later on today… if I'm granted your permission, of course."

Mum sighs. "Isobelle, I understand that you're frustrated-"

"You _don't_ understand," I interrupt. "I'm sure your parents never kept you in your house like some glass figure." I give Mum a steely gaze. I know she dislikes it when people bring up her parents, but what other reference can I make?

"You know your father and I don't mean anything by it," Mum assures me.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" I ask. "You won't let me move out; you don't want me to live with Holden… I don't even know why I listen to either of you. I could just leave if I wanted." I've known that for a while, so why don't I just leave? I want to move in with Holden, but I also don't want to be a burden to him. I won't move in with him _because_ I love him so much. And it hurts that I don't feel like I can tell him that.

"It really is better for you to stay at home. At least until you have everything sorted out."

I close my book. "And how long is that going to take? It's been six-and-a-half years, and I don't feel as if I've made any progress. I'm still living at home, I can't even move in with my _boyfriend,_ and I don't even have a job," I complain, waiting for Mum to give me some sort of lie to make me feel better about all this.

"Speaking of that, I spoke to Mister Montague the other day," Mum starts. Mr. Montague is one of Dad's old friends from school. He used to play for the Falcons, until he retired and got a job in the Ministry. I'm not sure exactly what he does.

"And?" I question, wondering what relevance this has to anything.

"And he said he would be nothing less than thrilled to have you come in a few days out of the week and help his son out. He's about your age," Mum tells me. I'm not exactly sure how to feel about this news.

"What does his son do? I won't be filing paperwork all day, will I?" I ask. "I'd at least like to be paid."

Mum gives me an odd look. "I assumed that if you really wanted to get out of the house, it wouldn't matter to you whether or not you were paid, or what you did," she tells me. Well, it isn't a deciding factor, but some money for my work_ would_ be nice.

"I was just asking," I inform Mum. So, I'm obviously not being paid anything, and I'll be interning with some bloke whom I've never even met. How incredibly fun I'm sure this will be. "When do I begin?"

"Tomorrow, actually," Mum informs me. Talk about short notice.

"Brilliant, but who's going to watch all the younger ones?" I question. When you have four siblings, it gets a bit tiresome to say all their names every time you want to refer to them collectively.

"Victoire offered," Mum informs me. Although Victoire and I have had our issues in the past, we get along reasonably well now. However, this is probably because we don't ever really speak, and even then we're only civil for Teddy's sake.

"Oh, how kind of her," I say unenthusiastically. I only hope that Victoire doesn't rub off on my siblings. I wouldn't be able to handle any replications of her.

"Isobelle, I really think this will be good for you," Mum tells me. I can tell she's being sincere, but I'm still a bit upset with her.

"I hope so. " Mum studies me for a while, but neither of us makes a sound.

"Did you mean what you said earlier?" she asks finally.

I said a lot of things. "About what?"

"You said Draco and I weren't doing any good keeping them away from their parents. That didn't come from nowhere," Mum tells me. Of course, I wish I could blame that little outburst on the heat of the moment, but Mum is too smart to believe something like that. "Where did you hear that from?"

I suppose I may as well just tell the truth. I made a promise to do so anyway. "Rose and Scorpius," I answer. Mum raises her eyebrows.

"They only got home yesterday," she points out skeptically.

"That's when they told me. Last night… before I went out," I answer. "Scorpius wants to get to know Astoria, and Rose wants to get to know Ron." I watch Mum carefully when I say this, seeing how she'll react. She presses her lips into a thin line.

"They just came up to you and told you this?" She questions.  
I nod. "They seemed to have given it a fair bit of thought, though," I tell her. "They knew exactly what they wanted to say."

"Well, I don't understand what they thought you were going to do." Mum says this out loud, but it sounds more like a thought she meant to keep in her head.

"They wanted me to ask you and Dad about it," I explain. I'm rather glad that Dad isn't here for this conversation. I can't really rely on him to stay level-headed the way I can Mum.

Mum puts her hand on her forehead. It's obvious that she never thought this day would come and if she did, she didn't expect it to come so soon. "I don't know what to tell them, I absolutely couldn't have Ron back. It would just raise too many questions, and I don't know how he's going to take everything. He can't simply walk in and out of the picture just like that," she rambles. Mum's ex-husband is a very sensitive subject. They'd known each other from childhood, become best friends, fought a war together, fell in love, married and had children, and then divorced, which resulted in Mum marrying one of her 'enemies'. Somewhere in that timeline I fit, seeing as I was one of the causes for the divorce. It was a shock and a scandal to the entire wizarding world when the news was made public, but Mum stuck by us and didn't let any of that rubbish bother her. Yet, I still feel as if a part of her still cares about what Ron thinks of her. That I don't understand.

"I know, but do you think it would be fair?" I question.

Mum sighs, a defeated look on her face. "I honestly don't know. Of course, Rose and Hugo should know their father, but that really isn't up to me. I'm not just going to go to his home and ask him to reclaim his children after all these years," she says resignedly. "I'm sure he'd rather act as if none of this ever happened."

I frown at Mum. "The last I heard, Ron was in Romania," I tell her. "Is he not still there?"

Mum shakes her head slowly. I wonder why she never told me this before. I suppose it just wasn't relevant information. "He came back to England a few years ago, actually. He married some muggle woman," she informs me. Wow, Ron must really have a thing for women with muggle heritage. I decide to keep that thought to myself. I wonder how Mum even knows those things about Ron, but I don't ask. That's another conversation for another day.

"What about Scorpius and Astoria?" I question. "Do you think he should get to know her?"

Mum shakes her head vehemently. "Oh, heavens no. I understand she is his biological mother and everything, but I just don't agree with it. Granted, Ron and I had our arguments, but never in front of the children. Astoria was downright abusive to the both of you," she explains. Astoria treated Scorpius and I pretty badly, but it was always obvious that she favored Scorpius over me.

I can't help but wonder that even if Astoria and Dad had just grown apart and divorced, would Mum have wanted Astoria back in Scorpius' life? Mum loves Scorpius with everything she has, and I can tell that it bothers her just a bit that he isn't technically _hers._ I hate to say this, but I've always been able to sense Mum had a bit of envy toward Astoria; envy that Astoria gave birth to such a wonderful son as Scorpius. But she was too stupid and selfish to realize what she had when she had it.

I really wish Scorpius could remember how terrible Astoria was.

* * *

**(A/N: Thanks for reading! Sorry, I've been super busy this week! Hope you enjoyed the chapter! Had to put a little bit of Belleden –that's going to be their official pairing name!- in there. Tried to keep them as cute as before. And then some Isobelle/ Draco conflict of course, because they can never really get along well for too long, can they? So, what do you think? Should the parents come back? Let me know! Thanks for reading :) **


	3. I miss our Little Talks

*** I got a PM from someone asking if they could write a fanfic using Isobelle and Holden. I don't mind, as long as you credit me for my characters, and any other information I made particular to this story. It's honestly very flattering that I've created characters that ins[ire other people's imaginations, and it makes me feel quite proud of myself that I didn't just creat something to be read, but to be thought about!**

***Oh, and to answer the question I've been asked at least thirty times, I'm 14 years old. I think I mentioned being a freshman at one point in TBaM, but if you didn't catch that, now you know!**

**The title of this chapter comes from the song 'Little Talks' by "Of Monsters & Men!" Check it out!**

* * *

Rose comes into my room, a guilty look on her face. Nina is at her heels. "Mum says that breakfast is ready," she tells me quietly.

"Yeah, come eat breakfast, Belly!" Nina adds, flopping down on my bed.

"I'll take it in my room. Have a house-elf bring it," I say disinterestedly. I'm not in the mood for a family breakfast. Even though she's used to having them around, Rose seems about as uncomfortable with the idea of house-elves as Mum does. I'm not sure why, because I don't believe she'd rather bring my breakfast upstairs herself. Rose stands in the doorway for a while.

"Sorry…" She apologizes.

I wrinkle my eyebrows at my younger sister. "What are you sorry for?"

"I'm sorry that you argued with Dad because of me and Scorpius," she says, chewing her bottom lip. How can Rose believe that was her fault?

"You didn't do it," I assure her. "It isn't your fault that Dad's narrow-minded and's got his head shoved too far up his ass to realize what I want." Nina giggles at my use of 'profane' language.

Rose frowns. "I'll go see about your breakfast," she mutters before turning away. Perfect, I've scared her off. I set my hairbrush down in front of my mirror. I have to be at the Ministry in about an hour. I'm rather anxious to get out of this place.

A house-elf appears in my room, carrying a breakfast tray. "Set it there," I instruct, gesturing to my bedside table. "And while I'm gone, I'd like my room cleaned. I want my linens changed, the bed turned down, my closet reorganized, my bathroom scrubbed down and all of my new robes ironed. Hang them back up when you're done," I say dismissively. The house-elf nods apprehensively before leaving.

Nina gets off my bed and comes over to where I'm sitting in front of my mirror. She begins playing with my hairbrush and the perfumes on my table. "Don't knock any of those over," I tell her.

"I won't," Nina assures me, holding a bottle up to her nose. She screws up her face and gives me an odd look. "Why do you wear this one? It smells nasty." I look at the label on the front and snatch it from Nina.

"That's not perfume!" I snap. "Give that to me!"

Nina gives me a confused look and reaches for another one. "What about this one?" She asks. "It looks funny!"

"No. Just… Get out of my room," I mutter.

"I just want to see what it smells like," Nina protests, picking up another bottle off of my table.

"I told you no!" I reach to take it from her. Nina won't let go. "Give-it-to-_me!_" I tug harder, and the bottle comes out of both our grasps and shatters on the floor. I watch as the remains of my calming draught seep into my carpet.

Nina's eyes widen. "Sorry, Belly," she apologizes.

"You little shit! I'm going to kill you!" I scream. Nina runs out of the room, and I chase after her. "Get back here!"

"What in Merlin's name is that noise?" Dad demands, standing at the end of the hallway with his arms crossed. Nina runs up to Dad and hides behind his legs.

"Daddy!" Nina shrieks. "Belly said she's going to kill me!"

Dad sighs and rubs his face with his hand. "What happened?" he questions, an annoyed lilt in his voice.

"Because of Nina, I don't have any more calming draught!" I tell Dad. "That was supposed to last me until the end of the month!"

"I'm sure you can get some more," Dad says nonchalantly, more concerned with the death-grip Nina has on his robes.

"You _know_ I can't! This is great! Just bloody, sodding great!"

"Watch your mouth in front of your sister," Dad reprimands. I have a few choice words I'd like to use toward him.

"What's all that yelling?" Mum questions, coming upstairs.

"Your daughter is bothering me," I say, turning to stomp off.

"What's wrong with Belly?" I hear Nina whisper as I round the corner.

"She's just a bit on edge, dear," Mum says calmly. "I want you to do me a favor and go apologize to her okay?"

"Do I have to right now? She's really mad at me," Nina questions. She's right. If she walks back into my room, I'm liable to murder her.

"Not now, but I want you to do it, okay?" Mum says.

"Kay, Mummy." I hate how this is completely Nina's fault, and yet I'm made out to look like the bad person. Merlin, does that situation ever remind me of someone. I glance at the spilled potion on my carpet in disgust. Seems as if the house-elves will have one more thing to do while I'm gone.

* * *

I knock on the door of the office apprehensively. Immediately it opens, and I'm met by a young blonde man, who already has a frown on his face.

"What do you want?" He demands.

"Are you Simon Montague?" I question, hoping to all higher beings that the answer is no. I don't want to be stuck with this git for Merlin knows how long.

"I am. Are you from Hogwarts?" He questions. Well, that's a stupid question if I ever heard one.

I shake my head. "No."

"What school, then?" Why is he assuming that I'm a student?

"I don't come from any school," I say impatiently.

"You aren't my summer intern?" Simon questions, looking a mixture between confused and annoyed.

"That's what I'm doing, then…" I mutter under my breath. Great. I know what 'intern' means. I'm almost positive it's interchangeable with the word 'slave'.

"Excuse me?" Simon questions. I really don't like him, and I've known him for all of two minutes.

"Never mind."

"Who are you, then?"

"Isobelle Malfoy." Simon wrinkles his eyebrows and regards me as if I'm telling a joke.

"I've heard of you." His voice suggests that he hasn't heard good things. "I must say, I expected you to be taller."

"Does my height make me any less qualified?" I retort, narrowing my eyes.

Simon curls his lip at me. "No, but your insolent attitude certainly does." He says the word 'insolent' as if he's speaking to a child.

"I don't trust the reason I'm here is to have a conversation outside your office?" I ask hotly. Simon shakes his head and reluctantly invites me into his office. It's dark and cold, but the furnishing is nice, and the room smells like mint. Simon closes the office door with his wand, and then thrusts a stack of papers in my hand.

"You can begin by filing these," he mutters, not even glancing in my direction before having a seat at his desk.

"What are they?" I question, looking them over. They all seem to be full of names and personal information.

"Papers. Haven't you seen any before?" Simon questions sarcastically. What a prick.

"That wasn't what I meant. Are you always so rude?"

"Are you always so insubordinate?"

"I wasn't raised to take orders from other people," I inform Simon bitterly.

"Well it appears that your father hasn't properly prepared you to earn a job, now has he?" Simon retorts. Even though he isn't looking at me, I can see a smirk etched upon his face. Of course, I haven't the slightest idea of how to get a job. For more than half my life, I'd been raised under the impression that I was a pureblooded witch. Pureblood women don't work under any circumstance, at least not in my family. Being a pureblood himself, Simon would know that.

"Simon-"

"Mr. Montague," Simon corrects. As if I'm going to call him that. He can't be more than a few years older than me.

"Simon's fine, thank you. May I ask, what is it you do?"

Simon sets his quill down and glares at me. "You seem to be doing a lot more talking than filing," he observes. I swear, if I wouldn't get in trouble, I'd give him a nice suggestion as to where he could stick his bloody papers.

"I'm only curious," I say innocently, rifling through the papers. "You're a social worker, aren't you?"

"I'm a social _lawyer. _Why do you say that?" Simon asks. Merlin, can't people just answer bloody questions when they're asked?

"Because I've seen papers like these, a long time ago, when I was a lot younger," I say vaguely. Being well acquainted with Simon's job, I know that he's the one that handles the divorces and annulments, and custodial hearings. He has the same job as Mr. Zabini.

"I would suppose you have, haven't you?" Simon questions.

"How would you…?"

"Your case is quite famous, especially among lawyers," Simon explains. "Now quit bothering me. I have work to do."

"How often are these updated?" I question, ignoring Simon's previous request. I think I may have an idea.

"Honestly, do you ever quit talking?" I ignore him.

"How often?" I question again.

"Annually," Simon answers curtly, rolling his eyes. If that's the case, then there must be papers somewhere in here that have information on Ron and Astoria, since they've been divorced and annulled from my parents. It would have their addresses, who they're currently married to now, and records on their children and such. Perhaps being an intern isn't so terrible.

I glance over my shoulder to make sure I'm not being watched. Simon is looking down, reading a letter and has probably forgotten that I exist at the moment. Quickly, I glance at the file cabinet, wondering where the papers on Astoria and Ron must be kept. Obviously, they're in alphabetical order.

"Weasley… Weasley… ah, here," I mutter, removing a piece of paper from the drawer.

"What was that?" Simon questions.

"Nothing, I was just, er… admiring your neatness," I lie. Either Simon believes me, or he just plain doesn't care, because he doesn't say anything else. I open a different drawer and grab the file with Astoria's name on it as well. I fold both pieces of parchment and shove them into my robes pocket. "I've finished," I announce.

Simon glances upward. "And you managed to do it all without a step-ladder," he congratulates me, faking a bemused expression. I inwardly roll my eyes.

"You really should try to be more original," I suggest. "I think I'll grow quite tired of your height jokes by tomorrow.

Simon taps his finger to his chin thoughtfully. "Oh, that's right, Father won't allow me to _sack_ you," He tells me, as if I should be very afraid. How the hell am I supposed to get fired from a job that I'm not even being paid to do?

"Well, you might just luck out and I won't come back tomorrow," I say nonchalantly, crossing my arms. Simon smirks at me.

"As if either of your parents would allow that," he scoffs.

"What does it matter what my parents would allow?" I demand, narrowing my eyes. Simon shrugs.

"Well, your mother put all this hard work into finding you something to do. The way she spoke about you, I assumed you were younger," He explains in a taunting voice. I absolutely will not let such an asshole like him bother me.

"That just goes to show how misleading assumptions can be, doesn't it?" I question, my jaw clenched. "Do you have anything else for me to do?"

Simon hands me some more papers. "Take these down the hall."

"Making rounds wasn't in the job description," I mutter.

"Apparently, neither was any kind of work ethic."

* * *

"Do you think my dad would like me?" Rose asks quietly, giving me a hesitant look.

I nod. "Of course, your father would like you. Why would you ask something like that?" Rose shrugs.

"I don't know. Didn't you ever wonder if Mum would like you?" When she puts it like that, it _is_ a fair question.

"Yeah, all the time I did. But you know that your father likes you. I knew absolutely nothing about Mum," I point out. Rose purses her lips.

"What if he doesn't anymore?" She questions hesitantly.

"Don't even think on that," I tell her. "That isn't a possibility. Now, let me ask _you _something."

Rose wrinkles her eyebrows. "What?"

"What's got you and Scorpius so interested in your parents all of a sudden? You've never asked about them before." I would assume that it's just a part of growing up, but Rose and Scorpius have never showed even the _slightest_ sign that it bothered them who their parents were.

Rose shrugs. "I dunno. Well, at school a lot of people asked me about my dad and stuff, and I didn't really know what to say, and so they would just look at me odd. It was just...so..._em-embarrassing_..." Rose bows her head, and her shoulders begin to shake with quiet sobs. It must have been torture for her to go to Hogwarts and have students constantly asking her about her famous father. It must have been even worse that she didn't really know anything, nor could she remember it.

I pull my younger sister closer to me. "You shouldn't be embarrassed, Rose. You shouldn't _ever_ be embarrassed by something that you have no control over," I tell her quietly, stroking her hair.

Rose shakes her head slowly. "But, I _a-am. _I f-feel like I should know th-these things but I d-don't..." she protests. It hurts me more than anything to know that Rose and Scorpius might feel as empty as I felt for all those years. I wouldn't even wish that sort of feeling on my worst enemy.

"It's difficult, I know. But no matter what happens, things are going to work out. I promise. Hey, you know something?" I question. Rose looks up at me, and her lower lip is still quivering.

"What?" her voice is so quiet, it seems that only her lips are forming the words.

"You have _two_ parents that love you unconditionally. That's already more than I knew I had," I tell her.

Rose seems to be considering this, but she doesn't look completely bought. "I know..." she mutters. "Which is why I'm afraid to say something to Mum. What if things get ruined between Mum and _your _Dad because I want to see _mine?" _I know it isn't fair, but I feel slightly annoyed when Rose points out that we don't have the same father. I want to remind her that Dad's been more of a father to her than Ron, but I don't want to upset her any more.

"Get ruined? What do you mean?" I ask instead.

"Well, Dad sort of left Mum because of you..." Rose says this hesitantly, as if she's afraid of hurting my feelings. My feelings are hurt, but I know that Rose is right. I can't hold it against her, because she didn't mean it in a rude way. I just don't want her to begin blaming me for this, but I fear that she will.

"Other things were going on too," I add, trying not to discourage her. Rose seems to sense that I'm slightly upset by her comment.

"But what if it _does_ ruin things between Mum and Dad? I could never live with that." Oh, and I can? According to most, I'm the reason _both _my parent's marriages failed. I've dealt with that for seven years.

"Look, if Mum and Dad separate because of this, then they didn't really love each other like we thought, right?"

Rose's eyes widen and she gives me a slightly shocked look. "You mean _my_ Dad never loved Mum?" She asks.

"I put my hand to my forehead and sigh. "No, that's not what I was saying. I just meant that, if Dad was ever willing to leave Mum because of this, then we wouldn't want them together anyway, right? That would mean he didn't care enough about you or Mum to think of what you want," I explain. I know that I've confused Rose, but she nods politely and pretends not to show it.

"But you always say that Dad doesn't know what_ you_ want," she reminds me.

"That's different, you see. Dad and I, well we've been together the longest out of everyone in this family. I mean, there was a point when it was just _us. _No Mum, no Scorpius, no Scorpius' mum, it was just the two of us. I suppose it was for that reason that Dad and I grew so close, which makes all this feel even more confusing. We've both changed a lot. There's no way that this _won't _change you, so be prepared for that."

Rose frowns slightly, and her eyebrows come together. "But I like who I am," she tells me, sounding quite conflicted. "At least I think I do..."

"Changing doesn't necessarily mean that you become a completely different person," I inform her. "Changing can just mean realizing certain things about yourself that you didn't know before."

"What did you realize about yourself?" Rose asks curiously.

I purse my lips in thought, thinking of something that will benefit Rose to know. "I suppose I realized that I never really spoke up for myself. I kind of just let my grandparents and Scorpius' mother say what they wanted to me, and I didn't say anything back," I answer.

Rose shakes her head in disbelief. "That can't be true, you _always_ argue with Mum and Dad," she tells me.

I roll ny eyes and smile with guilt. "It is true. As for what's going on between Mum and Dad, I suppose it all stems from the same thing. But at the same time it's different, you wouldn't understand. Anyway, it's _you_ we're talking about, not me." My relationship with Rose probably isn't as strong as a sibling relationship could be. Of course, my relationship with her isn't the same as mine is with Scorpius. Still, I've always felt as if we never really bonded, or had any strong common ground beyond our looks. Don't get me wrong, I love Rose just as much as I love all my other siblings, but we're about as close as distant cousins who only see each other on important holidays like Christmas and Easter, not siblings who live together. I try my hardest to be someone who Rose can look up to, but half the time, I'm convinced that I don't do too well at that.

"I know. But you know more about this than I do."

I sigh and give Rose another hug. "I don't know as much as you think I do," I admit.

Rose looks at me as if I'm mad. "You know a lot of things she tells me."

"Like what?" I question, waiting for her to humor me. One thing about Rose is that she always tries her hardest to make you feel better about yourself. I hope she never loses that trait.

"Well, you know how to pick out really nice clothes. You know a lot about books, and you always give me good ones to read," Rose answers. "And you know how Scorpius and I feel."

I give Rose a small smile to let her know I appreciate her telling me that. "What does Scorpius think of all this?"

"It bothers him the same way he bothers me. But he says that he knows his Mum misses him. I don't know how, but he says that he knows it," Rose answers. If Astoria is still the same selfish snake she was, then that can't be true. I'm sure Scorpius is just being hopeful.

"Does he remember her?" I ask. Rose nods, and then shakes her head.

"Well, he told me he remembers her face a little bit. Like if he ever saw her again, he could recognize her,but it's still fuzzy. Kind of like with my dad. I'd only know him if I saw him," she explains. As sad as it is, I have to consider Rose and Scorpius a bit lucky. I wouldn't have known my mother no matter how many times I saw her. "He says he remembers her voice a bit too, but only the way she said his name. He says he wants to hear it again some day." I hated Astoria, but that right there nearly breaks my heart. It also hurts that Scorpius apparently misses Astoria so much, but he told Rose about it, not me. I don't mean to sound bitter our resentful, but I've known Scorpius his entire life, and he used to tell me everything. Does he blame me for Astoria's absence?

"Oh," I say to myself, not knowing any other way to respond.

Rose nods solemnly. "I know we've been talking a while, and I've been thinking of something the whole time..." she mutters, her voice trailing off. The cross between uncertainty and hopefulness in her eyes makes me wonder if that's how I looked when I was her age.

"What is it?"

Rose takes a deep breath, and she's suddenly interested with her hands in her lap. "Well, Father's Day is in a couple weeks, and I was wondering if...never mind, it's stupid," Rose says, shaking her head.

"You were wondering if you could possibly see you father by then?" I guess.

Rose nods slowly. "D'you think so?"

I honestly don't know what to say, because I believe the chances of that happening are very slim. I don't want to admit that to Rose and let her down, though. "I don't know. Maybe," I say, trying my best to sound hopeful. I hope my voice is convincing enough.

* * *

Teddy glances at me from over the rim of his coffee mug. "Wow," hey says. "I never thought I'd see that coming. They always looked so happy."

I nod in agreement. "I never thought they'd ask, either. But, it's not that they're just asking, they actually _miss_ their parents," I tell him. I decided to talk to Teddy about this, because he always knows what to do. I can always go to him for advice. "And I'm sure they, Rose especially, expect me to do something to bring them back just because I understand what they're going through. It's like they think I have some power in this."

"Well, do you?" Teddy questions, raising an eyebrow. I hold a silent debate in my head on whether I should tell him about the papers I got from Simon's office. It's Teddy I'm speaking to, and I can trust him no matter what. It can't hurt.

"I suppose..." I say. "Do you know Simon Montague?"

Teddy scoffs and nods. "Do I? He was a year above me in Slytherin, also the biggest prick I ever met," he tells me. I couldn't have said it better myself.

"That's the very one," I say. "Well, he works at the Ministry..."

"Yeah, you're interning there, right?" Teddy questions. I nod, and annoyed expression on my face.

"For Simon. Basically, I'm just doing all the shit he's to lazy to do himself," I answer. "Did you know that he's a social lawyer?" Teddy shakes his head.

"Really? I never imagined that git to be in a profession that involved helping other people..." I don't know Simon too well, but I was a bit amazed by it as well.

"And he made me file all the new papers. They were pretty recent, and they had one on Ron and one on Astoria," I continue, hoping Teddy will get this picture. I can tell he realizes what I did when his eyes widen just a bit.

"You took them, didn't you?" I nod.

"You can't tell anyone," I make him promise. "And besides, I'm going to return them." Teddy seems fine with this once I tell him I plan on giving the papers back.

"What are you going to do with them?" He questions.

I shrug. "There are a lot of things I _could_ do, I suppose. Write them, go to their houses, just about anything. But there really isn't anything that I want to do. I want to get things sorted first. If I tell Scorpius about this, and then tell him not to do anything rash, it'll be as if I never even spoke," I explain.

"That's true," Teddy agrees. "What do you think about it?" I'm getting a bit annoyed with being asked this question, because it's a bit difficult to answer. I'm not sure whether he means in general, or just in my particular situation.

"Well, every child should get to meet their parents if they can," I say, not trying to shed too much light on Teddy's particular predicament. "But in the case of Ron and Astoria, that changes things. I really don't know. I think Rose and Scorpius should know their parents, but the thought frightens me, because I know who their parents _are,_ especially Astoria," I tell Teddy.

He nods solemnly. "Yeah, definitely. But at the same time, if Rose meets Ron, it's only fair that Scorpius meets Astoria."

"Exactly," I agree. "That's what I'm afraid of."

"Does Hugo ever wonder about Ron?" Teddy questions matter-of-factly.

I shake my head. "Never. He treats Dad, like he's just as much his parent as Mum. He really likes him," I answer. Speaking of that, one thing I'm glad about is that Scorpius and Rose feel comfortable with their step-parents. One of the reasons I wanted to meet Mum was so that I could have a parenting figure in my life that _wasn't _as terrible as Astoria.

"That's good," Teddy says. "Rose gets on with him, too."

"Yeah, and Scorpius gets on with with Mum. Did Rose and Scorpius seem any different this year?" Granted, I've only really seen Rose and Scorpius about three times since last September, I don't really know how different they are. I'm still trying to find out.

"Not really, at least not to me anyway. I never knew they were so close, though. Connected at the hip those two were, even after the sorting," he tells me. It's no secret how close Rose and Scorpius are. They may as well be full siblings, better yet twins. Ironically enough, Rose is only a handful of days older than Scorpius.

"Oh, they're very protective of the other," I inform Teddy. Scorpius won't say so, but he's very protective of all his siblings, including me. "But they just don't seem like _themselves,_ you know?"

"I'm sure you didn't feel like yourself when all that rubbish was going on with your dad and Aunt Hermione," Teddy points out. He's right, I felt like a completely different person.

"I don't want them to feel like that," I tell Teddy. "Especially Scorpius. Merlin knows the kid's been through the ringer."

Teddy puts his hand on my shoulder in a comforting touch. "It's great that you care about them so much," He tells me.

"Well, I didn't really have anyone in my family there for me," I point out, shrugging nonchalantly. "Except for you. I just don't want them to feel like no one understands them, because I do. It's just that at the same time, I don't know if it's best for their parents to be back, maybe not right now anyway."

Teddy wrinkles his eyebrows and gives me an odd look. "What do you mean 'not right now'?" He questions.

"I just mean, when they're older. There are some things about Astoria that Dad and I aren't quite ready to let Scorpius know just yet," I remind him. I know it isn't anywhere near fair to keep Scorpius in the dark about his mother, but I think it may be what's best for him.

"What about Rose?" Teddy asks.

"I don't know. I mean, she's very mature, but at the same time I know that she's a lot more nervous about everything than she'll let anyone know. I see so much of myself in Rose," I admit. "But I think she's a hell of a lot more levelheaded than I was."

A light smirk comes across Teddy's face. "It would be difficult not to be. So, what are you thinking?" I want to admit to Teddy that I don't really know yet, because I don't. For some reason, I feel a bit guilty about not knowing how to help Scorpius and Rose. I wonder if I would feel the same way if I wasn't one of the reasons their parents left.

* * *

**(A/N: So, I hoped you liked this chapter! It's beginning to get more serious again, like TBaM was... It's starting to become obvious that Rose and Scorp's parents being gone affected them, and they **_**do**_** think about it, just like Isobelle did. I really hope that you guys kind of get what's going on with Isobelle's feelings. Her thoughts on Rose and Scorp meeting their parents are starting to mirror Draco's... interesting... Hope you liked the chap!**

**Thanks for reading! Leave a review! Let me know any predictions you have for what's to come!)**


	4. The Worst Things in Life Come Free to Us

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

****Title of this chapter comes from 'The A Team' by Ed Sheeran. Love it!****

* * *

"Isobelle, you've been lying in bed for two days. You need to wake up," Mum says, shaking my shoulder vigorously. I curse and turn over, facing away from her. She knows better than to wake me so early. "It's nearly eleven."

"Get out..." I mutter. Suddenly, a blinding light shines in my face, causing my head to pound. "Close my damn blinds!" Mum sighs.

"You need to wake up. You have to be at St. Mungo's in almost a half hour," Mum tells me.

I roll my eyes. I'm not in the mood to see any bloody Healers today. "I'm not going..." I mumble, laying back down. "Let me sleep."

"You haven't gone in three weeks, Isobelle," Mum reminds me. "You're starting to get that way again..." 'That way' is Mum's way of saying crazy. She won't admit it, but I'm not stupid.

"I'm not getting any kind of way!" I snap. Mum raises her eyebrows at me.

"That's exactly what I'm talking about. You need to go," she tells me.

"Why? So that I can be asked the same questions I've been asked for years, and give the same answers I've _been_ giving? I'd much rather not, and I'm not a child anymore. You can't make me go." Mum sighs and gets up.

"Does not going make you feel as if you have some sort of control over all this?" She questions, giving me a cynical look.

"What?" I ask.

"Do you think that not doing what your father and I tell you to makes you more 'grown up'?" Mum rephrases.

I shake my head. "No. I'm just not going because _I _don't want to," I say simply. It really isn't any more complicated than that. "I'm not getting any better."

"It takes time," Mum tells me.

"You think I don't know that? I've gone for a total of eight years! Is that not enough time?" I demand. "I have other things to worry about."

"Like what?" Mum asks. "What do you have to worry about that's more important than your health?"

She can't really be _that _blind, can she? "Scorpius and Rose!" I answer. Mum frowns slightly.

"Rose and Scorpius aren't your children to care for," she tells me gently. I hate it when she patronizes me like this.

"But you don't know what it's like. Neither does Dad. Only _I _know. You don't know how important it is to be understood," I tell Mum. She seems slightly offended when I say this.

"Yes, I do, Isobelle," Mum tells me.

"Then you would have understood _me_!" I point out. "Rose and Scorpius need someone to understand them. I don't want them to end up like me. Do you want to see them in and out of Healers' offices for the majority of their lives? Do you want them to run away? Do you want them to try and _kill_ themselves? Is that what you want?" I question.

"Isobelle, stop," Mum says firmly, glaring at me. I don't know why she's so upset. It could happen.

"They're so young... I know you don't want all those things happening to them. I know I don't want to see them happen, either."

"_Nothing _is going to happen, Isobelle."

I sigh. "I told them that, too."

"I would get dressed if I were you," Mum tells me in a cutting voice.

I give her a blank stare. "Why? I'm not going anywhere until later," I tell her.

"You're going to St. Mungo's soon," Mum reminds me, an edge to her voice.

"No, I'm not. I'm not going," I say again. Why doesn't she get it?

"So, you're giving up on this whole thing?" She asks.

I shake my head. "I'm not giving up. I'm just not wasting my time any longer," I inform her.

Mum shrugs, and I can tell she isn't in the mood to argue about it any more. "Fine, do what you want. Like you said, you're 'an adult'. But I hope you don't think overusing sleep potions to knock yourself out is doing you any good. You should just hope your father doesn't find out," Mum tells me in a warning tone.

I frown at Mum. "What?" I question.

"Isobelle, don't play innocent with me. I know what you're doing. Absolutely no one can go through all those potions you do in such a short amount of time. Especially when you mix them with alcohol," Mum tells me. "You're seriously going to hurt yourself."

"You don't know what I'm doing!" I shout. "Don't accuse me of anything!"

"I'm not accusing you, Isobelle. I'm just telling you that this isn't the way you're supposed to deal with your problems," Mum tells me calmly. How can she say that she isn't accusing me?

"Get out of my room..."

"Isobelle-"

"Get the hell out!" I scream, getting to my feet. I cross the room and throw open the door, pointing into the hallway. "Go! _Get out!" _

Mum puts her fists on her hips. "Isobelle, don't you dare speak to me like that!" She argues back. "I'm trying to help you."

"You can help me by getting out of my room and leaving me alone!" I inform her.

Mum shakes her head and sighs in defeat. When she walks past me, she looks me right in the eye. "You're only hurting yourself."

"That's more than I can say for you," I retort, rolling my eyes.

"Breakfast is ready, you should come downstairs and eat something. I'm sure your stomach would appreciate it," Mum tells me.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask, narrowing my eyes at Mum.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about," Mum answers, not going into detail. "You smell like Firewhiskey."

"Get out of my room." What the hell is wrong with Mum? I don't even look at her as I slam the door. I decide to quickly get dressed, and then go down to eat because I really am hungry.

My robes from yesterday are still on the floor, I must have forgotten to put them out for laundry. I pick them up quickly and check the pockets, making sure that those papers I got from Simon's office are still there. When they aren't anywhere to be found, I nearly have a heart attack. Where the hell else could they be? I didn't even take them out when I was telling Teddy about them, they shouldn't be anywhere else. There's no way. That's the thing about having something you aren't supposed to. You can't tell anyone when you've lost it.

Deciding there's no way I can dwell on it now, I get dressed and head to the dining room. The rest of my family is already seated and eating. Mum gives me a look, but she doesn't say anything.

"Good morning, Isobelle," Dad says to me.

"Good morning," I mutter back, putting food on my pate. I stop one of the house-elves walking by. "Bring me a glass of champagne, when you get the chance."

Mum and Dad both look up at me. "It isn't even noon yet," Dad points out disapprovingly.

"So?" I question. "Should that mean something?"

"You know Dad doesn't like it when you drink so early," Scorpius whispers, leaning in to me. I give him a look to shut him up.

Dad opens his mouth to say something as well, but Mum stops him. "Draco," she says calmly, gesturing to my other siblings with her eyes. Dad gets the message, and settles for giving me a dirty look instead.

"What's wrong, Daddy?" Nina questions, glancing between Dad and I.

"Nothing's wrong," I assure her.

"Your sister's right," Dad agrees. "There's absolutely _nothing_ wrong with her and that habit she's developed."

"Draco!" Mum hisses. "Not at the table."

"Please, we're trying to enjoy a nice family breakfast. Don't ruin it," I tell Dad, smirking at him. The grip on his fork tightens, and he clenches his jaw, but he remains quiet.

"Mum, you said we were going to Flourish and Blotts today?" Rose questions, changing the subject.

Mum nods."That's right."

"Why do we have to?" Hugo asks. "I _hate_ the book store."

"You can stay at home with me and Isobelle," Scorpius offers. What the hell, why am I staying at home?

Hugo nods happily."Okay-"

"_Actually,"_ Mum says quite loudly. "You have to come with me, Hugo. Isobelle and Scorpius' grandparents are coming over to speak to them tonight." I can't help the groan of protest that escapes my lips. I absolutely _hate_ my grandparents. I hate them nearly as much as I hated Astoria, and that's saying something.

"I'm not staying for that," I decide. "And if that's the case, why isn't Nina staying?" If Mum and Dad are going to continue playing this game, then Narcissa and Lucius are Nina's grandparents as well.

"Yes, you are," Dad tells me. "They have something important they want to say to you."

"I'm sure all they want to do is call me a filthy cross-breed or something like they always say," I mutter so only Mum and Dad can hear. Dad narrows his eyes and gives me a look to tell me to shut my mouth. "Well, they do," I insist. Out of all my siblings, Scorpius is the only pureblood, and the only one of us my grandparents actually likes. They dislike Mum's children more than they dislike me, and they make it quite obvious. Whenever they're around, Mum makes a point to be sure that Rose and Hugo aren't anywhere in a ten-kilometer radius to avoid any potential arguments. They've met Nina a couple times, and they treat her about the same as they treat me. That's because they believe we have the same parents.

"Well, you can keep it to yourself," Dad says dismissively.

"I'm sorry that I don't want to stay and hear their rubbish. How rude of me," I retort.

"What do they want to tell us?" Scorpius asks curiously. He has a slight look of apprehension on his face.

Dad shrugs. "I'm not sure exactly," he answers.

"Even better reason for me not to stay. I don't like surprises," I say. "You said you were going to Flourish and Blotts?" Mum nods. "Great, I think I'll-"

"Stay at home and have dinner with your grandparents like your father wants you to," Mum interjects, giving me a final look. "I believe that's a brilliant idea, Isobelle." I sigh and roll my eyes.

"Whatever."

* * *

I'm still pissed that Dad's making me stay at home and have dinner with my grandparents. It's a method of torture. I don't even see why Dad sticks up for them so much, what with all the issues he's had with them. I'm sure they like Scorpius more than they like him.

"Isobelle," Grandmother says, completely emotionless.

"Narcissa," I reply. Dad glares at me.

"_Isobelle_," he chastises.

"What? I had other plans tonight," I inform him. "Really, I don't want to be here. I'm not even going to lie. Do you mind if we hurry this along a bit?" I ask sweetly.

Grandfather rolls his eyes. "This is exactly what happens when young people have children," he drawls, giving Dad an accusatory look. Dad ignores him. "They aren't taught any sort of civilities." If that's the case, what's _his_ excuse?

"I am being civil. I'm just on a bit of a tight schedule," I explain.

"She means she wants to go and see Holden," Scorpius translates, smirking. Nothing can describe the look of utter distaste that crosses Grandmother's face.

"He's William's boy, isn't he?" She questions, turning to Dad. Dad nods, and Grandmother shakes her head. "William always was such a disgrace. I'm sure his son is the same."

"He isn't!" I snap. "Because Holden's father didn't want to be a Death Eater anymore, he's a disgrace? It's pitiful that you think that way." Both Holden and I come from staunch Death Eater families, but Holden doesn't know anyone from his Dad's side of the family was ever a Death Eater. It really upsets me that he doesn't know, but I feel like it isn't my place to tell.

"What's pitiful is someone who doesn't stand by their beliefs wholeheartedly," Grandfather corrects me, staring Dad down.

"Was it not the two of you who walked away from Voldemort?" I question. "Is that not turning from your beliefs? Or is it just cowardice?"

"Isobelle!" Dad shouts.

"Please Dad, it's the truth. The two of you want to act as if none of that ever happened. You're just as bigoted as you always were. How can you dislike someone for realizing they're wrong?" I question. My grandparents are absolute idiots. It's sad they don't even realize it.

"If I were you, I'd find it a good idea to quit repeating everything I was told by some silly boy," Grandmother informs me coldly.

"I'm not repeating anything! It's purely my own opinion!"

"That makes it all the more frightening," says Grandfather.

"You know _what?_ I don't-"

"What'd you want to tell me and Isobelle?" Scorpius questions hesitantly. I notice that he's been awfully silent this entire time.

"'Isobelle and I?' We're getting there, dear," Grandmother corrects him, smiling in his direction.

"Really, why don't you go ahead and tell us?" I question. "I'm sure Scorpius and Dad are growing just as impatient as I am."

"I'm sure that would only be possible if either of them had _prior engagements _as well," Grandfather says, giving me that annoyingly bored look of his.

"Father," Dad sighs resignedly. "What was it you and Mother wanted to tell us?"

"Well, Scorpius asked Lucius and I to do something rather important, and we agreed," Grandmother starts, a smug look crossing her face. Scorpius' pale cheeks flush red, and he gives our grandparents a completely shocked look. I don't like the sound of this.

Both Dad and I turn to look at Scorpius. "What did you ask them to do?" I question. Scorpius won't answer. "Scorpius? Tell us."

Scorpius hangs his head and refuses to look at any of us. "I just wanted to know what she was like..." he mutters.

"What _who_ was like?" Dad questions, giving Scorpius a stern look. "Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, you tell me this instant."

Scorpius still won't look up. "My mum..." He whispers, just loud enough for Dad and I to hear. Nothing can describe the second of stunned silence that falls between Dad and I. Then I realize that I was right. Scorpius_ did_ take those papers out of my robes.

"You went in my room, and you went through my things," I say angrily, my voice rising. "Those papers weren't for you to take!"

"I'm sorry, Isobelle. I just heard you telling Teddy, and Rose and I thought-"

"No, you _didn't_ think!" I scream. "Did it ever occur to you that if I wanted you to know, I would have _told_ you?" Scorpius shakes his head silently. Dad can't even look at him. I don't know how I can stand to.

"What did he take from you?" Dad questions, doing his best to not reach across the table and strangle Scorpius. It seems to be taking a lot of self-control.

"I had papers with Ron an Astoria's addresses on them!" I answer, glaring at Scorpius still.

"Where-"

"That doesn't matter," I tell Dad hurriedly. "And they were in my robes Tuesday! There's no telling _when_ that little git snuck them out!"

Dad turns to Scorpius, finally understanding the situation. "You did this?" He demands.

Scorpius nods ashamedly. "Yes," he mutters.

Dad runs his hand through his hair. "Go upstairs. I can't even stand to look at you right now. Just get out of my sight."

Scorpius gives Dad a bewildered look. "But, I'm not done eating," he protests.

"Go to your room!" Dad shouts. Reluctantly, Scorpius gets up and sulks away from the table. I'd feel bad for him is he hadn't been completely stupid, _and_ stolen from me. Slowly, Dad turns to face his parents. "What the hell did you do?" I've never heard him take such a dangerous and accusing tone with them ever before in my life.

Grandmother raises an eyebrow at Dad. "Don't make such assumptions, Draco. It's very rude. It was dear Scorpius who came to us."

Dad waves his hand as if he doesn't care either way. "What did he do?" He demands.

"He wrote Astoria a _very _detailed letter," Grandfather answers smugly. "I'm sure it mentioned the basics. How he misses her, how he wishes she would return...how it would be _better_ for our family."

"What does this have to do with the two of _you_?" I ask, narrowing my eyes at them both. Even though I know I'm about to hear something I won't like, I'm still not prepared for it.

"After Draco's separation from Astoria, Lucius and I didn't completely eliminate the Greengrass family from our lives," Grandmother explains to Dad and I as if we're idiots. "I simply played messenger."

It takes a second for Dad and I to realize what Grandmother is saying. "You gave her a letter from Scorpius?" Dad shouts. I'm positive Scorpius can hear him all the way from his room. "You know that I didn't want them to have any contact with each other!" I'm sure that Dad hasn't taken any legal action toward Astoria since she got out of Azkaban, and I now know that something like that must be done every five years for it to remain valid.

"It isn't about what you want, Draco," Grandmother informs him. I swear if I wouldn't get arrested, I'd murder both my grandparents.

"Scorpius is _my_ son!" Dad argues, slamming his fist on the table.

"He's Astoria's son as well. Draco, you're harming the boy raising him the way you are. He especially needs a proper upbringing, considering that opportunity's been lost with _this one_," Grandfather gestures to me coldly.

"You mean a _pureblood_ upbringing," I correct. "You want him to end up as pathetic as you and your wife!"

"As long as he isn't raised the same way you were. Honestly, Draco, it's still beyond me as to why you ever insisted-"

"Because I'm responsible for my actions, Father. That's one thing you seem to know nothing about!" Dad argues, glowering at Grandfather, who looks as if he could laugh at the entire situation.

"Don't take up such a tone with your father," Grandmother admonishes. "You should be grateful that we care for Scorpius as much as we do. He needs a mother in his life again."

"He has Hermione!" Dad yells. Even I know that isn't acceptable to my grandparents.

As if on cue, Grandfather rolls his eyes. "Your wife will _never_ be Scorpius' mother. How many times must I repeat myself, Draco? Marrying that mudblood was the worst thing you ever did for this family, other than even impregnating her in the first place," he sneers, throwing a hateful glance in my direction.

I truly wish I could say that I remained calm and civil and didn't at all feed into my grandparents' immaturity. If I said any of those things, I'd be telling a great lie.

"Don't you _ever_ use that word against my mother! The only thing ruining Scorpius' upbringing are your bigoted asses!" I scream. "How could you possibly be stupid enough to believe that someone like Astoria could _ever _raise a child? That's right, it's because you aren't at all concerned with her mothering abilities! You just care about what kind of damned blood she has!" I stand up from the table, disgusted with the sight of Grandmother and Grandfather. "I'm leaving. I can't stand _either_ of you any longer!"

Grandmother and Grandfather don't say anything. I'm sure they wanted nothing more than to see me explode with anger, and I've given them that. Right now, though, I can't be bothered to care, though. "Isobelle!" Dad tries to call me once more before I disapparate.

* * *

Holden looks up from the television when he sees me, and he frowns immediately. "What's the matter, Belle?"

I shake my head, the feeling of lead on my tongue. I sit down heavily beside Holden. "He wrote her. He wrote to her, and he wants her back," I answer.

"Who?" Holden questions, wrinkling his eyebrows.

"Scorpius. He wants to meet Astoria again," I whisper, my voice faltering a bit. I know that this can't be good, and I also know that nothing can be done about it. I feel as if I have no control over anything.

Holden gives me a thoughtful look for a while, unsure of what to say. "What do your parents think?" He asks finally.

I exhale deeply. "Dad's absolutely outraged. Mum doesn't know yet. But, it's not as if they don't already have enough problems. You know how things are between them." No one can doubt that Mum and Dad love each other, but their marriage has been a difficult one. The fact that Mum's muggle-born impedes on many of our family's traditions. Even from knowing Dad as long as she has, Mum still doesn't quite understand pureblood ways.

"Yeah, I know," Holden says. "I'm really sorry to hear that."

"I'd suggest saving your apologies, I'm positive things are going to get a lot worse," I admit. How can they not? Having Astoria back in the picture will complicate everything even more. I'm not looking forward to it at all.

"How are you feeling?" Holden asks quietly.

"I don't know. This is all starting to bother me. I'm barely getting along with Mum and Dad anymore, and I have no idea what the hell was going through Scorpius' mind for him to do that..." My voice trails off, and I feel my breathing begin to quicken a bit. "I just..."

Holden takes my hand in his. "Hey, none of that, okay? You're fine." I look up at him.

"I don't think I am," I tell him in a low voice, my lip trembling. "I need you."

"I know. I'm here for you, Belle." Holden leans down slightly and my lips meet his. I pull him closer to me, and I let my shoulders rest on the sofa cushions. Holden's body is so near mine, he's holding himself over me with his arms. Being with him started off as nothing but awkward fumbling, but I've come to enjoy it immensely. Holden's hands move across my chest, under my robes, and I have to stop him in an attempt to pull his shirt over his head. Years of quidditch have given him a toned body. I lift my chin to allow Holden to kiss me again. I feel myself wanting to give more of me to Holden, but I just can't think only things I can concentrate on are Scorpius, and Astoria, and my Grandparents... and _Scorpius,_ and _Astoria_, and my _Grandparents..._

"Merlin, Belle, are you alright?" Holden asks quickly, pulling away from me. It's only then do I realize that I'm sobbing, and I probably have been the entire time. I feel so embarrassed, and so childish that I can't even return Holden's concerned look. "What's wrong? Did I-?"

"_N-no_." I answer quietly, harsher than I mean to.

"It's just, you cry a lot when we..." Holden doesn't finish his sentence. He doesn't have to. It's just so difficult keeping such a rough facade at home, I often crack when I'm with Holden. It makes me feel guilty that he always has to deal with me when I get like this. I'm sure he'd much rather not.

Gently, Holden puts an arm around my back, bringing me closer to him. I rest my head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry," I apologize meekly.

Holden shakes his head and kisses the top of my hair. "It's alright, Belle. Really. I know things are going to be tough for a while, but you'll get through it. You always do." Even though that seems to be the truth, it feels as if I'm only floating along, and just getting by at that. And then recently, things have grown so difficult that I just can't cope by myself. I need something _else_, and I'm too afraid to admit that to Holden for fear of what he may think. I'm sure he, like Mum and Dad, would advise against it, but I really am afraid of losing the ounce of sanity I have left.

"It's a lot. And it's been this way my entire life." I know Holden knows this, but I don't think he knows that I'm growing very tired. I feel as if I'm trying to exist in two separate places at once. I'm trying to move on and begin my life, yet all the while, I'm trapped by my past, and no one seems to be able to fix that. Healers can only do so much. There gets to be a point where even _they_ can't fix you. I've long since reached that point.

"I know. But no matter what happens, I love you. You know that," Holden tells me, rubbing slow steady circles on my back. I want to ask him how he could ever love me for so long. I understood it when I was younger because things aren't as serious at that age, but _now? _We're adults, and Holden has his entire life started. In actuality, Holden could have moved on without so much as a second glance in my direction. Why didn't he?

* * *

**(A/N: Sorry for not updating in like a million years! So yep, Astoria's coming back (*Gasp!*) And something's going on with Belle! Any guesses? Let me know what you thought, leave a review, because I'm seriously NOT getting that many :(. Seriously, even if you don't have any comments on the story but just my writing in general, feel free to say something! Thanks for reading!)**


	5. Mistakes Become Regrets

***Thanks for all the awesome reviews from last chapter! Means a lot, keep it up :) I really love you guys, all my readers are so important to me, I'm glad I'm making you happy!**

***The lovely Joanne Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

****Title of the chapter comes from 'Show Me What I'm Looking For' by Carolina Liar! Great song :)**

* * *

"Simon, may I ask you for something?" I question hesitantly. Simon's quill quits moving, and he glares up at me. "What do you want?" He demands.

"I need a favor," I say.

"I don't _do_ favors, Malfoy," Simon informs me. "Where the hell are those papers I asked you to organize an hour ago?"

I'm so caught up in my thoughts that I can't even remember what I did with them. "Er, they're in that cabinet there," I answer, remembering.

Simon looks at me like I'm stupid. "Well, go _get_ them," he orders.

I cross the room, bending down to remove a stack of papers from the filing cabinet. When I turn around, I briefly notice Simon staring at me intently, with a look I've only ever seen Holden give me. I decide to ignore it. "Um, here," I say, handing them to him.

"Set them on the desk. Don't you see me writing?" I swear, if I didn't want anything from Simon, he absolutely wouldn't be speaking to me this way.

"Sorry," I apologize, setting the papers down.

"What did you want?" Simon questions.

"What?"

"What were you going to ask me? It's obviously distracting you, and I'm not in the mood for your half-ass work." I breathe out of my nose and close my eyes for a count of three, trying to calm myself down.

"Well, um, you see... my brother sort of wrote to my mother, asking for her to come back. It really isn't a good idea, though. She was released from Azkaban seven years ago, and we had restraining orders then, but I was told they only last five years, so I was-"

"Wondering if I'd allow you to file another one?" Simon questions. I swallow and nod. "Do you have a reason to? Have you got any evidence that she's currently posing any sort of threat to your family?"

"Well, no but-"

"Then why the hell are you asking me for a restraining order? Simply because you don't like her?" Simon questions. Perhaps if he could shut his damned mouth for a minute and let me explain, he'd have the answer to his question.

"No. She was terribly abusive to us both, and she... tried to kill me," I answer. Simon all but shrugs.

"When was this?" He asks.

"Seven years ago."

Simon raises his golden-blonde eyebrows at me. "Not recently, then?"

I shake my head. "Last time I checked, seven years wasn't recent," I retort, unable to handle his asshole behavior any longer. "Are you even going to listen to me?"

"I am listening, but your point seems far from valid," Simon tells me.

"Valid? For you to have studied my case, you obviously know nothing about it!" I argue.

"Oh, I know a great deal about you and your family. And I must say, Astoria was one of the best things that ever happened to it. What do you have against your dear younger brother having a proper mother?" Simon asks.

"Not a thing. That's why I don't want Astoria back," I inform him. "She doesn't know how to a raise a child."

"She'd be better than _your_ mother. Do you honestly believe that your brother won't be embarrassed to say he's been brought up by some muggle woman?" Simon questions, looking disgusted at the thought. "I could hardly imagine the humiliation."

"Blood doesn't have anything to do with how well of a mother you are," I tell Simon bitterly.

He rolls his eyes. "Believe what you want. But magical blood knows how to raise magical blood. Muggles and muggle-borns don't understand. They don't know our ways." Our ways? In no way am I part of this!

"If you believe that, you must not know Astoria at all," I scoff.

"I know her quite well, actually," Simon replies. "Her mother and my grandmother are friends." I should have guessed as much. "She's the perfect pureblood wife. Given a second chance, she might actually do something right for your family."

"Merlin, that's amazing..." I mutter.

Simon furrows his eyebrows. "What is?"

"Your head's shoved further up your ass than I ever believed possible!"

Simon shakes his head mirthlessly. "It's so rude of you to speak to me like that. Perhaps you should have allowed Astoria to mother _you_. What else can I expect, though, from someone with so much muggle _filth_ in their blood?" He drawls, narrowing his eyes at me.

Before I can even realize what I'm doing, I take my wand out, and point it at Simon. "You take that back!" I shout, seething.

"I'd rather not," Simon decides. "What are you going to do? Hex me? You don't have it in you."

"You don't know that!" I snap. Simon walks from behind his desk and comes up to me, until the only thing separating us is my wand.

"If you were going to do something, you would have already done it," he reasons.

"You really want to be hexed, don't you?" Even I can hear my voice faltering just a bit. Simon takes my hand and gently pries my wand out of my fingers. His hands are softer than I would have thought. "Don't touch me."

"Why not? It's completely honest, unless _you're_ making something of it..." That's smooth of Simon to make it look like _my _fault. He twirls my wand in his hand leisurely.

"I'm not. Give me my wand." I reach for my wand but Simon draws his arm back, causing me to stumble into him.

"Getting ahead of yourself there, Malfoy. At least let me take you out to dinner first," he jokes, smirking at me arrogantly.

"You aren't funny! Let me have my have my wand back!" I ask, reaching for it again.

"Getting flustered are you?" Simon questions.

I shake my head. "No, just highly annoyed. It tends to happen when I'm forced to spend so much time with an idiot like yourself," I tell him sarcastically.

"Now, now, no need to get testy. You know, Father always said I had a terrible habit of sleeping with my interns. He doesn't appreciate it one bit. I suppose that's why he hired you," Simon explains conversationally. "But you see, I rather like that fiery attitude of yours. Do you have it in bed as well?" I'm shocked that Simon is outright asking me something so personal and rude.

"I wouldn't worry about it, because I have no interest in sleeping with you!" I assure him.

Simon looks at me odd. "Great, I'm not exactly too keen on shagging you either. Besides, you've been running about with McKinnon for Merlin knows how long. I remember the way he used to talk about you," Simon mutters, rolling his eyes as if the thought sickens him. "Mother and Father never did care for that family."

"Then it's a wonderful thing that I don't give a damn what your family thinks, isn't it?" I question, finally succeeding in snatching my wand back from Simon. "Now, are you going to help me or not?"

Simon nods. "Sure, I will. I'll have an order allowing Astoria's return out in less than two days," he tells me.

"What the hell does that even mean?"

"Let's just say if you get a knock on your door in the next two days, your brother may just have his mother back," Simon tells me, giving me that awfully smug look of his. I could kill him! How could he?

"You despicable asshole!" I shout. "That wasn't what I asked you for!"

"I told you, Malfoy. I don't do favors," Simon reminds me. "What reason do I have to listen to you, anyway? You're blinded by hatred."

"I am not!" I protest. "The only person I hate right now is _you!_"

"Why? Because I'm doing my job?" Simon questions.

"If you're job's to ruin families, then yes, you're doing it perfectly! What kind of lawyer _are_ you?" I question.

"One who knows how a proper pureblood family should be run," Simon informs me. That's the thing. My family isn't a pureblood family anymore. The only pureblood are Dad and Scorpius.

Isn't part of being a lawyer not being so biased until you have a reason to be? However, I'm sure that Simon would much rather put his own views in front of his job. "Must that be different than any other family?" I ask.

Simon nods. "Different, yes, and better. You'll thank me later, Malfoy," he assures me. I know that won't be the case.

* * *

When I get home, I stomp upstairs and slam the door to my room so hard my mirror shakes. Simon is such a disgusting asshole! How the hell could he possibly decide to put Astoria back in my family? Because 'pureblood mothers are better at raising pureblood children'? Who the hell ever came up with something so idiotic? The worst part of all this is the fact that _I_ was stupid enough to ask Simon about it! What the hell did I _think_ he was going to say?

After I change my clothes and take my hair down, I try to get my thoughts together. What the hell am I going to say to my parents? They're going to be absolutely pissed at Scorpius and I both. But then again, I don't really have to say anything. I could pretend to be just as shocked as they'll be when they see Astoria on their doorstep in a couple days. The thought of that makes me angry all over again. I let out a frustrated scream and chuck one of my shoes across the room. What the hell did anyone do to deserve this? Granted, Mum and Dad are liars, my grandparents are demons, and I'm not exactly perfect either, but no one deserves Astoria in their life, not even once. I don't want to be forced to relive my childhood years.

I can't think straight at all. All those memories concerning Astoria come back to me, and I feel my head beginning to ache. I don't know why I'm so worried about how Astoria's going to be, because I'm an adult now. I can protect myself. I think I'm more afraid of what's going to happen between her and Scorpius. I know that he'll be so blinded by the excitement of finally meeting her again that he won't even realize for a while what kind of person she really is. The same thing happened to me. There's inevitably going to be conflict between Mum and Astoria over who is Scorpius' mother. They never really interacted when I was younger, but I know things won't be pretty now. I just know it. As if the thought of that isn't enough, I really am nervous for what Astoria may try to do. She could ask the Ministry for Scorpius back, she could _take_ him- she's done it before- the possibilities are just endless. I really do need to relax.

Since I have no calming draught left, I decide I have to settle for the next best thing. I open my wardrobe and root around for a second, procuring a bottle of Firewhiskey. Now, generally it's people with 'problems' who hide alcohol. I don't have a problem, I just hate hearing my parents whine about my drinking. It makes me feel better, and they should want that for me.

I uncork the bottle and pour it into a glass from my nightstand. The burning sensation of Firewhiskey going down my throat is enough to calm me slightly. Soon, I finish that glass and pour myself another. I'm feeling much more relaxed now.

I don't know how it happened, but soon I'm in my bed, and I've drank off half the bottle of Firewhiskey. However, I do feel much better.

There's a knock at my door. "C'me in..." I say. My door opens, and Nina walks in. She begins jumping on the edge of my bed.

"Dinner's ready! Mummy says come eat!" She announces.

"'M not hungry," I tell her, putting my hand to my forehead. It seems that Nina jumping up and down is making my headache worse.

"But Mummy says come and eat! Come on, Belly!" Nina bends down to tug on my arm. "Belly!"

"Stop..." I mutter. "Just leave m'alone."

Luckily, Nina obliges and runs to the doorway. "Mummy! Belly won't come and eat! And she's talking funny again!" She shouts.

I swear Mum apparated or something, because she's in my doorway in an instant. "Nina, won't you go downstairs and tell Daddy to come up here? The four of you can go on eating without us. We want to speak to Isobelle a moment, and then we'll be down," Mum assures her.

Nina nods. "Kay, Mummy."

As soon as she's out of my room, Mum sticks her fists on her hips and glares at me. "How could you?" She asks.

"'Ow could I _what_?" I question.

"What is it?" Dad asks, coming into my room as well.

"Draco, she's drunk," Mum sighs. "Again."

Dad nudges Mum gently in the back, moving her further into my room so that he can shut the door behind them. "What the hell is the matter with you?" He demands.

"Nothings'a matter," I answer. "I just hadda bad day. That's it."

"'Nothing's the matter'? Isobelle, this is the third time you've done this in two weeks! That can't honestly still be your excuse!" Dad shouts angrily.

"Draco, it isn't any use. She doesn't understand a word your saying," Mum tells him. Of course, I understand them!

I nod my head in protest. "Yeah, I do . You're givin' me all've your normal bullshit..." I answer.

"Please forgive your mother and I for not approving or your reckless drinking! You have four younger siblings, this isn't something they need to see!" Dad argues.

"... why I'm in m'room, dumbass." I roll my eyes at Dad's stupidity.

Mum has to grab Dad's shoulder to keep him from charging at me. "Draco! She doesn't know what she's saying!"

"I don't give a _damn_, Hermione! She won't speak to me this way, sober or not! This wasn't what we decided! I'm not taking care of a grown-"

"I know, Draco, I know. Just calm down, we'll let her sleep it off, and we can talk about this in the morning," Mum suggests. Dad doesn't look like he agrees with this, but he clenches his jaw and doesn't say anything else. Mum turns to me. "We're very disappointed in you, Isobelle." Dad opens the door and they walk out. He's sure too slam it. It doesn't really bother me what they think. Mum and Dad have enough problems to deal with. Maybe they should find a way to cope like I have.

* * *

"Hey, Teddy," I say the next afternoon, as my older cousin appears in the living room. I'm feeling remarkably better after my episode yesterday with my parents.

Teddy smiles at me. "Hey," he says back. "What was it you wanted to tell me?"

"Er, let's go outside first," I suggest, taking Teddy's arm and leading him out back to the patio. "It's a beautiful day."

"Yeah," Teddy agrees, taking a seat in the chair across from me. "But I don't think that's the reason you wanted to talk to me?" I sigh and shake my head.

"No, not the weather. I just need someone to keep my head on my shoulders. That person's usually you," I say.

"I try to be a good fiance when I can," Teddy says, smirking at me.

"You git." I roll my eyes and try not to smile back. As ridiculous as it sounds, Grandmother and Grandfather have been adamant about Teddy and I marrying. They believe that if we've messed up the families of our respective bloodlines, we should at least be together, because that would strengthen the Black line either way. Even though Teddy would make the best husband in the world, I can't see him as any more than family, and an older brother at that. We do joke about it sometimes, though.

"It's absolutely disgusting, isn't it? If Andromeda were alive, could you imagine her and Grandmother saying their grandchildren were married to each other?" I ask.

Teddy shudders at the thought. "Yeah, that's gross. But it's completely normal as far as Black standards go."

"Poor Scorpius, he'll probably be subjected to that absolute insanity when he grows up," I realize.

"If there're any purebloods left_ for _him to marry," Teddy adds. The whole lot of them is decreasing at a fast rate. I suspect it's due to severe inbreeding.

"Well, Dad's thinking about Daisy. They're already friends, but she's older than him." It's frowned upon in pureblood marriages for a wife to be older than her husband. As if it isn't enough, not only is Mum muggle-born, she's also older than Dad. They were screwed over from the start.

"It's only a year, though. That isn't too bad," Teddy reasons.

"I know. It's sad, though," I insist. Purebloods don't really _arrange_ their marriages, per se, they sort of just make suggestions on who they believe their child should be with. But, if you don't marry who your parents want, they'll probably disown you. "I don't know how Dad can instill all these values in Scorpius when it's obvious he doesn't believe in them himself." I know Dad does it so that Scorpius won't ever have to catch all the shit that he does, but how can he raise Scorpius as a pureblood, knowing who his wife is? And who his step-children are? And who I am?

"Do you think every pureblood believed in all the stuff they were taught?" Teddy questions.

I shake my head. "I never did." Even though I shouldn't have been, I was given a pureblooded upbringing. I understand the way my dad and grandparents think, and I know what kinds of prejudices against muggles exist. At an early age, I was prepared not to carry on those sorts of ideals, but I suppose it never mattered. I can't fathom why Dad would be any different.

"So what's the question? Your dad doesn't know any different. What is he supposed to do?"

I know Teddy's right, but the idea of it is _wrong._ "Learn from Mum," I say hopefully. Even though they're married, Mum and Dad both have different parenting styles, and they kind of stick to raising their own children certain ways. Mum doesn't know how to prepare Scorpius for the world in the way that he'll need to be, likewise with Dad and Rose and Hugo. The only one they can really parent together is Nina, and even that probably won't work out in the long run.

"That wouldn't work," Teddy reminds me. I know that, but I wish it did.

"You're right, because apparently only purebloods are fit to raise other other purebloods. It must be an unwritten rule," I say.

Teddy wrinkles his turquoise eyebrows. I don't think he's ever going to outgrow having his hair such an insane color. "What do you mean?"

I may as well tell Teddy. He'll know what to say. "Well, Scorpius found that paper I had and wrote to Astoria asking her back, and Grandmother _gave_ it to her. Then, like an idiot, I thought that Simon might possibly be able to help me keep Astoria away, but that didn't happen. Instead, he said it was good that Scorpius was finally having a pureblood mother raise him again, and that he could bring her back soon as possible. Which happens to be tomorrow," I explain.

I can't read the look on Teddy's face. "Well, Simon's an asshole," he tells me. Merlin, I knew that. "But more importantly, what are you going to do?"

I shrug. "What can I do? It seems as if I'm always powerless to do much of anything."

"Have you told your parents yet?" Teddy asks. I shake my head. "Why not?"

"I couldn't possibly admit to them that this is partly my fault. Besides, we aren't exactly speaking at the moment," I admit to Teddy.

"Are you arguing again?"

I nod. "More than ever. I'm sure I said something to Dad last night that really ticked him off. I don't quite remember what it was, though-"

"Are you drinking again?" Teddy asks. His voice isn't at all accusing, and I can tell he isn't assuming anything about it.

I nod slowly. "Not as much as I used to, though, I don't think."

Teddy reaches across the table and takes my hand in his. "Why?" he questions.

"I just... I don't know. It makes me feel better, I suppose. Forget about things for a while, you know?"

"But your problems are still there when you wake up, aren't they?" Teddy points out.

"I mean, I suppose so, but... it's hard to explain, okay? You can't judge me for it," I tell Teddy, more pleading than asking.

"I won't. But it's not healthy," He reminds me. "Does Holden know?"

I shake my head. "That's not exactly something I can mention in casual conversation," I say.

"It should be something you're able to tell the man you love," Teddy points out. I know it should, but it wouldn't be fair to Holden telling something like that.

"I know. But I'm sure he's got other things to worry about," I respond.

"That's what you always say about these kinds of things. You can trust him, Belle. I mean, if Victoire ever felt like she couldn't-"

"Victoire and I are two different people," I remind Teddy harshly. I know he doesn't mean it, but I don't ever want to be compared to her. Victoire doesn't have nearly as many problems as I do. She's the way she is purely because she chooses to be.

"Sorry," Teddy apologizes. "I didn't mean it like that. It's just, being able to tell each other stuff is important in a relationship. You know that."

"I know, but so is wanting to protect that person."

"You're protecting Holden from yourself, then?" Teddy questions.

When he puts it like that, it sounds stupid, but I suppose I am. "Some parts of me," I answer.

"You shouldn't. It's been years now, and Holden hasn't gone anywhere. He accepts you, Belle," Teddy tells me, giving my hand a squeeze before letting go and offering me a small smile.

"I know that. It's just, I wish everyone did. Things are going to change again, aren't they?"

Teddy nods. "Yeah, but you know who you are. _That_ isn't going to change."

"Thanks," I say quietly, looking Teddy in the eye. "You don't know how great it is to talk to someone about all this."

"You can always talk to me, Belle," Teddy assures me. He notices the look of slight apprehension that's still on my face. "What's wrong?"

"I just don't want things to be the way they were when I was growing up," I admit. "That's what I'm most afraid of. And when Astoria comes back, what is Rose going to think? She's going to want Ron back as well. I know this is going to put a lot of strain on Mum and Dad's marriage, too.

"Well, just takes things one at a time. If anything, you've got to worry about how you're going to act with Astoria, if you argue with your _own _parents so much," Teddy points out.

"I was never nasty to her," I remind Teddy. Even when Astoria threatened to run me out of my own home, I never once got out of line with her.

"Think that'll last?" Teddy questions, raising his eyebrows. "I don't think there's enough calming draught in the _world_ to prevent that."

"Teddy, do you honestly believe that I'd blow up on Astoria?" I question.

He nods. "I'm your cousin, I'm not under any obligation to lie to you," he says at my put-off look. "Just choose your battles with her, you remember how Astoria is."

"Too well, I might add," I say under my breath. "I'm sure Dad will be worse about it than I, though."

"You're probably right," Teddy agrees. "The Malfoy temper's a hell of a lot worse than the Black one."

"And he's inherited both," I point out.

"So have you. You've got a natural talent for arguing. The law would love you," Teddy tells me, leaning back in his chair.

I shake my head in spite of myself. "That isn't true at all. I'm not pureblood, nor am I a male."

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Come on, Teddy. You know that's the criteria to be anywhere high in the Ministry. They say things have changed, but really, have they?" I ask. "The Ministry's full of old purebloods, with their backwards views. Then, when they resign, who takes their spots? Their sons that they've raised to be exact copies of them. I mean, look at Simon. They way he thinks, you wouldn't believe either of those Wars ever happened."

"What about Aunt Hermione?" Teddy questions. He puts his hands behind his head and closes his eyes, taking in the sun. It must be a blessing to not burn so easily.

"They don't take her seriously at all," I tell him. "Having a muggle-born woman working in the Ministry is about the same as hiring an extra house-elf to them. You barely notice it. You know, the older I get, the more I realize what a nasty world we live in."

"Tell me about it," Teddy agrees.

"Do you think it's the same for muggles?" I ask. Although I've never considered muggles much different from wizards, I've never given so much as a thought on their society.

"What d'you mean?"

"If you think about it, they really wouldn't have the same problems as us. I mean, muggle is as plain as you can go. You can't be less muggle than anyone else. _None _of them have any magic," I explain. Teddy opens his eyes and looks at me.

"Can you be any less wizard than someone else?" He asks, wrinkling his eyebrows at me.

"I wouldn't say that. But, according to most, that isn't true," I mutter.

"Bullshit. If you've got magic, you're a wizard. Simple as that," Teddy says with finality. "Since when are you so concerned with all of this anyway?"

I shrug. "I suppose the thought of it came about when I realized that there could have been a chance of Astoria coming back. And once I found out my grandparents weren't the only people who believed there was such a difference in upbringing between pureblood and muggle. I mean really, if Scorpius is introduced to all that, what's he going to think of Hugo, Rose, Nina, and I? We're half-bloods, he'll be raised to think he's better than us," I remind Teddy.

"Well, it all comes down to whether or not you think Scorpius will believe that. He grew up with all of you, he loves you, and he's a bright kid. I doubt a couple of ignorant words will change that," Teddy tells me.

I purse my lips. "I hope you're right," I say quietly.

"I hope I am, too."

"You're my best friend, Teddy." That's one thing I can be certain about. I never really understood how Teddy could be so many things to me at once. He's my cousin, but he's also my best friend, my confidant, and the older brother I never had.

"I know, Belle." The backdoor opens and Hugo and Scorpius walk out, carrying their brooms over their shoulders. Scorpius is holding a quaffle.

"Hey, Teddy," They say in unison. Teddy waves to them both.

"Hey, Belle," Hugo adds. I smile at my younger brother. I notice Scorpius doesn't say anything to me, nor does he even meet my gaze. He must think that I'm still upset with him. I'm not as upset anymore as I am worried for Scorpius. I don't think I would have ever been angry in the first place if Scorpius' mother wasn't Astoria. I can understand him wanting to meet his mother, it just makes things worse considering who she is.

* * *

**(A/N: Thanks for reading, lovelies! Sorry for not updating for while! BTW, Thanksgiving is Thursday, so I don't know if I'll be able to update this week, but I'll try my hardest!) So yep, Astoria will be back, very soon... Predictions for that? And must I say, I absolutely love Isobelle and Teddy's friendship! Oh yeah, and boo Simon for being a butthole! :) Thanks for reading, leave me and awesome review! **


	6. A Hole Where Your Soul Should Be

***Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling!**

***Thanks for reading, leave a review and let me know what you think of the story! I got like none last chapter :(**

**Title of this chapter comes from 'F*** You' By Lily Allen. I heard the songs and I was like 'This is Astoria. EXACTLY. Give it a listen :) **

* * *

Scorpius opens the door and quietly walks into the library. He doesn't look at me directly, but I can see the look of shame on his face. I glance up at him, wondering what made him want to come speak to me. We haven't had a proper conversation in three days.

"I'm sorry," Scorpius apologizes finally, playing with the sleeve of his robes and peering at his shoes. "I shouldn't have done it." He glances at the window. It's late in the afternoon, and the sun seems to be on its course to set.

I close my book and look up at my younger brother. "Come here," I say, waving him over. Scorpius comes to sit beside me on the sofa in the middle of the library. "What's going on with you? You used to tell me everything."

Scorpius shrugs, and he's silent for a while. "I don't know," he mutters finally, a troubled look on his face.

"Is Dad still mad at you?" I ask. Scorpius nods.

"Why is he so upset? Is it because of me, or my mother?" He questions. I don't know how to answer this question without bad-mouthing Astoria to Scorpius. I may dislike her, but I'll let Scorpius form an opinin of Astoria for himself.

"I think he's just upset you went behind his back about, he felt like you couldn't ask him about it yourself, you know?"

Scorpius nods sullenly. "Mum doesn't get mad at Rose about it, though," he points out.

"Well, that's because things are different with them. I don't think Mum and Ron are on as bad of terms as Dad and your mother," I say.

Scorpius' eyebrows furrow. "Why not?"

"Do you remember anything about the day she left?" I ask, hoping he doesn't. They day Astoria left was absolutely terrible. In that moment, every fear Scorpius ever had of Astoria not loving him was solidified. He didn't get over it until Mum began to take a bigger role in his life.

Scorpius shakes his head. "No, what happened?" he questions.

I open my mouth answer, then think better of it. "Nothing really. It's just, Dad and your mother fought a lot. An awful lot. It wasn't good for either of us," I tell him. That statement has a lot more meaning than he knows.

"But Mum and Dad used to argue a lot too, you said. It's been a long time, maybe my mother's different like Mum is," Scorpius says hopefully. I know that people like Astoria never change.

"Maybe." I turn to look at Scorpius. He's grown considerably in the past year, and his face is beginning to mature. With his white-blonde hair and piercing grey eyes, he looks like an exact clone of Dad. I'm positive Scorpius is going to break a lot of hearts when he gets older. The more Scorpius grows up, the more he seems to lose that air of trusting innocence he one had. "Mum loves you. You know that, right?"

Scorpius nods vehemently. "Yeah, I know. I never thought she didn't."

"It's just important you know that, though," I tell him.

"Um, okay." Perhaps I shouldn't worry so much for Scorpius. Teddy's right, he's a good kid. But even the best people can be influenced. "Are you still mad at me?" He asks.

I shake my head. "No, not anymore. I'm sorry for yelling at you."

"I forgive you," Scorpius says. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a pink sheet of parchment. "By the way, this for you." Scorpius hands the parchment to me. It says 'To Belly' on the front in Ninas' crazy handwriting.

"What is it?" I question, confused.

"Turn it over," Scorpius tells me. I do so, and the note says 'I'm having a tea party right now!' with a bunch of misshapen hearts and butterflies. Nina absolutely loves throwing tea parties, even more than I did when I was her age. If it wasn't for her blood, I'm sure she would get on a lot better with Grandmother. "She expects us to come."

"We'll hear about it from Mum and Dad if we don't," I agree. I'm sure that no matter what changes are coming, we can always count on Nina's tea parties.

I hold the library door open for Scorpius as we walk out and go upstairs together. Already, I can hear Nina talking loudly from down the hallway. I brace myself as Scorpius opens the door to Nina's room.

"Belly!" She smiles, her bright eyes lighting up. "You came!"

"Of course, I did," I say back, stepping into her blindingly pink room. Nina gets up from the table in the middle of her room and scurries over to Scorpius and I, grabbing our hands. "Scorpius, you sit right here with Rose and Hugo. Belly, you sit here with Mummy and Daddy because you're the oldest," she directs. Scorpius sits down gingerly beside Hugo, who looks like he'd rather be elsewhere. I don't think that it's such a good idea for me to be sitting beside Dad, but I decide not to say anything. I can be mature if he can. Besides, the sight of Dad squeezed uncomfortably into one of Nina's small flowered chairs is gratifying beyond words. Mum looks at me as if she wants to say something, but she remains silent.

"Daddy?" Nina asks. "Why can't I put the house-elves in tutus and princess hats?"

"If you give a house-elf clothes, it sets them free, Nina," Dad explains. Nina looks slightly crestfallen.

"But they would look so pretty..." she protests.

"You could always put a tutu on Hugo again, I'm sure he'd let you," Scorpius mutters, laughing with Rose.

"Shut up!" Hugo says defensively, his ears turning red.

"Boys," Mum admonishes.

"_Can_ I put a tutu on you, Hugo?" Nina questions, poking her lip out.

"_No!_" Hugo snaps.

"Nina, men don't wear tutus," Dad informs her.

"Since when is Hugo a man? He's barely got armpit hair!" Scorpius protests. Hugo glares at him.

"Rose?" Nina asks expectantly.

Rose nearly gags on her tea. "What?"

"You can wear a tutu like me because girls wear tutus," Nina explains, going off of what Dad said.

"No thanks..." Rose mutters.

"Oh, just be nice," I tell Rose."Wearing a tutu isn't going to be the end of you."

"You wear it then," Rose retorts. "Go on, put it on."

"I believe Nina asked _you_," I tell Rose, smirking.

"Yeah! Put it on!" Nina cheers. Rose sighs and glares daggers at me. This is definitely an interesting tea party. "You look so pretty, Rose! Doesn't she, Mummy?"

"Yes, Rose looks beautiful in her tutu," Mum nods, smiling at Nina.

"Do you want one, Mummy? I have one you can wear!" Nina offers.

"Oh, no that's alright. I do believe two princesses in tutus are quite enough," Mum politely declines. Nina beams at being called a princess and Rose makes an indignant face. Hugo smirks triumphantly at her.

"Come _on_, Mum!" Rose complains.

Dad gives her a disapproving look. "Rose, don't whine," he chastises.

"Believe me Dad, I'd be complaining too if I looked so ridiculous," Scorpius says, looking at Rose humorously.

"You don't look ridiculous," Nina assures Rose. "You look like me!"

Hugo snorts and covers his mouth quickly with his hand to prevent tea from dribbling all over the table.

"As if that's any better!" Scorpius says between laughs.

"Scorpius, stop being mean or I'll kick you out!" Nina threatens, glowering at him.

"Don't make fun of your sisters," Mum tells Scorpius, giving him a look.

"Yeah, shut it," Rose adds. "Or I'll tell everyone what you did at Hogsmeade that one time."

Scorpius immediately sobers up, but he throws Rose a sideways glance. The satisfied smirk she wears is enough to make me smile as well. Mum and Dad make eye contact, probably curious about what exactly Scorpius did. I'd like to know as well.

"Well, this is going nicely, isn't it?" I ask, in my best effort to ease up the mood.

"Yep," Nina agrees, smiling at me. "I told Daddy not to fight with you so it would be fun." Subconsciously, I gaze at Dad.

"Dad and I aren't going to fight," I assure Nina. "We're mature enough to handle that." Dad raises his eyebrows. "Do you disagree?" I ask, turning to him.

"On your part," Dad tells me, his voice low.

"You know, I really am trying my best. Thanks for realizing," I say bitterly.

"Then I must say, your little act a couple nights ago had me quite confused," Dad whispers back.

"You're just as guilty as I am," I hiss through my teeth. Mum gives both Dad and I annoyed looks. Scorpius kicks my foot. This isn't even my fault. Every single time I try to deflect an argument, one seems to happen anyway.

"Master Draco, you have a guest at the door," one of the house-elves says, stepping forward timidly.

"Er, I'll get it," I volunteer, too eager to leave that uncomfortable setting. I stand up and walk out of Nina's room, not even bothering to look at Dad. I go downstairs, frowning slightly, wondering who wouldn't just use the Floo instead. Perhaps it's Holden. He likes to be polite and use the front door, considering Dad dislikes him already, and I'm sure he's got him blocked off the apparition wards anyway.

I make it to the foyer and open the door. When I look at the person before me, my heart plummets and my fists clench. "Simon wasn't lying, was he?" I question in spite of myself.

Astoria smirks at me and pushes the door open, stepping inside as if she still lives at Malfoy Manor. "I'm afraid not. Look at you, Isobelle. I'd barely recognize you..." she drawls, looking me over.

"You don't look any different, though. Seems that month in prison treated you rather well," I throw back, giving Astoria an equally hard look. In all honesty, she hasn't aged a day. She looks just as I remember her. Same blonde hair, same ice blue eyes, same constant look of disgust...

Astoria half-smirks at me. "I see your face healed quite nicely."

"What? Did you still expect a hand print to be there?" I question.

Astoria ignores me and glances around the Manor. "It seems to have _changed_ around here," she says, curling her lip in disgust. "And not for the better. Where is my son?"

"Oh, you mean Scorpius?" I ask.

"Who the hell else would I be talking about?" Astoria snaps.

"I must say, I'm surprised. You never did seem to care about him," I remind Astoria.

"I cared for him a lot more than I cared for you," She points out coldly.

"And yet, that still wasn't a lot," I mutter with fake sympathy. I turn around as I hear footsteps coming from above.

"Isobelle, who was at the door?" Dad questions, coming downstairs. He still sounds a bit irritated at me, but I'm sure that'll change in a second when he sees our guest.

"Draco!" Astoria cries, an uncharacteristic sweetness to her voice. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

Dad stops halfway down the staircase. He's probably deciding whether he should come the entire way down and do something that will land him in Azkaban, or run back upstairs and pretend this isn't happening. "What the _hell_ are you doing here?" He demands, keeping his voice low. Nina's door is open.

"I want to see Scorpius, of course," Astoria answers. "Would you mind terribly getting him for me? I wouldn't want to inconvenience you."

"I belive you already have," Dad answers harshly, his eyes boring into hers.

Astoria wrinkles her nose and shakes her head. "No, I'm only visiting. Honestly, I just want to see my son. Nothing more. You can't deny me that, can you?" I don't know what Astoria's playing at, but I'm sure as hell not buying it.

"Why shouldn't I? You're crazy! You abused them both!" Dad whisper-yells, gesturing to me. "How long have you been going behind my back with my parents? Is this some sort of plan of yours?"

Astoria shakes her head innocently. "No, not at all. Draco, Lucius and Narcissa approached _me _with Scorpius' letter_. _Quite honestly, I've always thought about Scorpius, but I didn't want to spring anything on him. I didn't think that would be fair if he didn't actually want anything to do with me," Astoria explains, glancing at me. I know that's a stab at Mum."I've had a lot of time to consider my actions and really, I did behave rather immaturely. I've caused this family a lot of grief." Now, I've always believed Astoria to be a wonderful actress, but she's definitely gotten better over the years. I'm sure she's had loads of time to practice.

"Damn right you have," Dad mutters.

Astoria purses her lips. "Please, Draco, I know I ruined things between us, but I don't want things to be that way between Scorpius and I. I may never have the chance to correct our relationship, but Scorpius is my _son..."_ She looks like she _actually_ regrets the choices she made. _Bravo._

"Astoria, you must be out of your mind if you expect me to believe-"

"Draco, you must admit that I've stayed away for the past two years when I could have easily interfered with Scorpius' life. I don't have any other motives, I can promise you that," Astoria interrupts Dad, giving him a pleading look.

Dad eyes Astoria warily, but he can't really prove that she's lying. If he turns Astoria away now, he will have ruined Scorpius' chance of meeting her again. Scorpius would hate him for that. Dad sighs and rubs his chin. "Only for today. While _I'm _around. If you so much as _try_ anything, I will go straight to the Ministry myself, and you can kiss your son goodbye forever. Is that clear?" Dad questions, as if he's speaking to Scorpius or I.

Astoria grins at Dad. "Crystal. Now, where is my little boy?"

Dad gives Astoria one last hateful glare before turning to go back to Nina's room. A second later, after I hear him muttering with someone who I'd guess is Mum, Scorpius finally comes out with Dad. When he looks over into the foyer, Scorpius breaks into a wide grin. He nearly runs down the stairs and into Astoria's arms.

"My, you've grown a lot," Astoria gasps, looking Scorpius over. "You look just like your father!"

"Yeah... I hear that a lot," Scorpius says casually. I can tell that he's both excited and nervous to see Astoria again. "I er... missed you."

"I missed you, too, Scorpius. I really have missed you." Astoria smiles fondly at Scorpius and touches his face gently. It's nearly revolting to watch. "I feel so terrible that I had to leave you!" Dad clears his throat to indicate otherwise. Astoria looks up at Dad, and for a split second, I can see a hint of well-masked hatred in her eyes. She turns back to Scorpius, her back now facing Dad.

"Why did you leave?" Scorpius asks, looking confused.

Astoria purses her lips. "Your father and I didn't get along very well. And after I had to leave it put me into a terribly difficult state, and I really had to sort things out after that. I hope you can understand. I never wanted to leave you, dear. I love you," she tells Scorpius quietly. That was well-rehearsed.

"I know," Scorpius tells her. "That's what I told Dad and Mum."

"_Mum?_" Astoria questions, wrinkling her eyebrows. "Scorpius, honey, _I'm_ your mother." I glance at Dad, who looks as if he's about to explode with anger.

"Oh... um, I'm sorry," Scorpius apologizes, looking a bit uncomfortable.

Astoria smiles at him. "It's okay, love. I can't be mad at you for something you didn't know was wrong, can I?" Funny, that was never a problem for her before.

Scorpius shakes his head. "No..."

"Daddy! Where's Scorpius and Belly?" Nina questions, running out of her room, her pigtails bouncing behind her. Nina stands beside Dad on the stairs. "Who's that lady?" Astoria looks between Dad and Nina a few times, then raises her eyebrows at Dad.

"Daddy?" She repeats, regarding Nina scrutinizingly. "Draco, I didn't know you had another child."

"Why would you?" Dad questions, glaring at Astoria.

"Narcissa and Lucius never mentioned anything about it," she answers. Well perhaps if she'd let them out of her ear for a moment, she might be able to hear things for herself.

Nina's face lights up. "You know Grandma and Grampa?" She questions excitedly.

Astoria nods. "Yes, I've known them for quite a while now. Are you Isobelle's sister?"

Nina wrinkles her eyebrows like this is a silly question. "Yeah, Belly's my sister. You're really pretty," Nina tells Astoria, smiling.

Astoria grins at her in return. "And you're quite adorable yourself. You seem to be about the age my Scorpius was when I last saw him."

"You saw Scorpius before?" Nina asks, looking at him. Astoria has her arm around Scorpius' shoulder. Scorpius is purposely avoiding Dad's gaze.

"Of course, I have," Astoria answers.

Nina looks up at Dad. "When did she see Scorpius before?" She questions.

Dad doesn't answer her. "Nina, how about you go back upstairs with Mummy? We'll be up in a minute." Nina nods and walks back upstairs, looking at Astoria one last time. She appears to be quite pleased with herself

"Draco, you haven't even introduced me to your wife yet. After all, this is _her_ home now, too. I wouldn't want her to feel as if I'm intruding," Astoria says. Mum probably doesn't even know that she's here, but I'm sure Nina is about to tell her.

"You've already met Hermione," Dad reminds Astoria, his jaw clenched.

"She's your wife now, Draco. Don't be rude."

Dad frowns at Astoria, his hand tightening on the banister. "Don't you call me-"

"Astoria," Mum says stiffly, forcing a smile. I look up and see Mum coming downstairs. She links her arm around Dad's and forces him to come with her. "I didn't expect to see you."

Astoria effortlessly returns Mum's look. "Hermione, I'd really like to thank you for watching over Scorpius. I can understand what sort of transition that must have been." Even though Astoria doesn't say the exact words, I hear her loud and clear: _Raising your half-blooded children doesn't at all compare to raising my pure-blooded son. _

"It wasn't any trouble at all," Mum says tightly.

"That's a relief! I know how much you had on your mind at the time what with Isobelle, and your divorce from Ron. Who would have known you were pregnant as well? I certainly wouldn't have guessed!"

"Mum only told people who really needed to know," I tell Astoria, coming to Mum's defense. "Much like you did when you were pregnant with Scorpius." Scorpius' eyes meet mine, and then he turns away. I think he knows there's a lot more tension between all of us than we've let on, and he's wondering why.

"Of course. The media really can be harsh, can't they?" Astoria agrees. Even I have to second that. My family has had so many terrible things written about us, and in the recent years, many of those things have been about me.

"They most definitely can."

Astoria looks down her nose at Mum. "I'm sorry, Scorpius, but I really do believe that I should be going now," she tells Scorpius. His face falls.

"Do you have to go now?" He questions, giving Astoria a wistful look.

Astoria nods reluctantly. "I suppose so. It really was wrong of me just showing up like this, I suppose I should have spoken to your father and Hermione beforehand. I mean, they haven't even invited me in..."

Scorpius turns to Mum and Dad, giving them pleading looks. Dad ignores him. "Merlin, how rude of us. Astoria, would you like to join us in the sitting room for tea?" Mum offers. "I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem."

"But... we just had..." Scorpius trails off once he sees the look on Mum's face , but I'm sure he was going to mention the fact that we've already had tea with Nina. Mum's trying to keep that little detail a secret so that she doesn't have to invite Astoria to stay for dinner. I'm sure she wouldn't want to cook for Astoria. It annoys me that I know Mum would be too kind to spit in her food.

"I would love that," Astoria tells Mum. "I hope you don't mind, Draco?"

Both Scorpius and Mum give Dad looks. Dad clears his throat. "Not at all," he says gruffly. It's obvious by his tone that he minds it a lot.

"Lovely. Scorpius, would you mind showing Astoria to the sitting room?" Mum questions.

"Oh, I know the way, dear," Mum tells Scorpius. "I did live here at one point, but I'm sure you don't remember-"

"I remember," Scorpius tells her, smiling slightly.

"Isobelle, you don't mind joining them?" Dad asks, but it's more of an order than a question. I can tell he wants to have a quit talk with Mum about why the hell she just invited his psychopathic ex-wife into our home. Knowing Mum, she didn't do it without reason.

I shake my head. "No, I don't mind."

* * *

With every word Astoria speaks, I hate her more than I already do, and it appears that Scorpius likes her more. She's very smart, constructing her sentences just carefully enough to make it seem as if she cares about Scorpius, she absolutely couldn't bear to leave him, and it was all Dad's fault that she had to. She also says things in a way that aren't outright rude, and Dad would just seem to be calling her out out of spite if he were to say anything about it. It's manipulation at its best.

"Scorpius, dear?" Astoria questions, setting her teacup down on the table in front of her.

"Yes?" Scorpius says expectantly. He and Rose are sitting beside each other on the sofa. When she heard that Astoria was here, she wasn't initially jealous like I had expected. Instead, she seemed rather curious to meet her. Hugo appears to be rather indifferent. I have no idea why Mum brought them all downstairs.

"You are still quite a big fan of the Falcons, aren't you?" Astoria asks.

Scorpius nods. "Yeah, Hugo and I bet all the time on their matches. That's why I have more galleons than he does," he answers with a smirk.

"Who is Hugo? Is he one of your friends from school?" Astoria asks conversationally. Mum glances at Astoria with a look of utter distaste. Nina giggles.

"Um,_ I'm _Hugo," Hugo says uncomfortably.

Astoria puts her hand to her forehead. "How could I be so rude?" she apologizes, giving Hugo a fake look of sympathy. "Please forgive me, I'm absolutely horrid at remembering names!"

"It's okay," Hugo tells her.

"What were you saying?" Scorpius asks, urging Astoria to continue.

"Oh, right, right. You remember your Auntie Daphne, don't you?" She asks. 'Auntie Daphne' is Astoria's older sister. Surprisingly enough, she's even more foul and rude than Astoria, and that's a feat in itself. Scorpius nods. "Yes, well, a friend of her husband's is the manager for the Falcons, and I had a little chat with him. How would you feel getting to meet the team before a match one day? I know you absolutely love quidditch, and considering I've missed out on a lot, I thought it was the absolute _least_ I could do. Would you like that?"

Scorpius' mouth drops open. "_Would I?_" He repeats. "Yeah, I would! Thanks so much!" Scorpius looks as if he could die right there, if it wouldn't prevent him from meeting his favorite quidditch team in the universe. Even Rose looks surprised.

"Looks like your life's dream might come true," She says mockingly, nudging Scorpius on the shoulder.

Astoria smiles at Scorpius. "Let's not get too far ahead of ourselves, alright? You'll need to ask your father," she tells him, discounting Mum completely. I know that Astoria's doing it on purpose. She's going to make it at clear as she can that she no longer has any use for her. Scorpius turns to Dad, who looks as if he could shit bricks right now. He seems more enraged by Astoria's presence than I am.

"Can I go, Dad? Can I? Please?" Scorpius begs.

"Your mother and I will talk about it, Scorpius," Dad answers flatly, casting a scathing glance at Astoria.

"I've already made it quite clear that I have no problem with it," Astoria quips smartly.

Discreetly, Dad narrows his eyes at Astoria. Mum gives her a dirty as well. "_Hermione_ and I will discuss it," he rephrases, his words stiff. He can't outright say no to Scorpius, even though he already made it quite clear that he didn't approve of Astoria spending time with him alone.

Scorpius seems upset by his indirect answer. "Okay, Dad..." he mutters.

"Are you sad now, Scorpius?" Nina questions. I want to tell her that now isn't the time to ask a question like that.

"No," Scorpius mutters dejectedly.

"You _look _sad," Nina presses.

"Nina," I whisper, urging her to stop. "Not now."

"Sorry, Belly," Nina apologizes. Nina turns to Astoria. "Rose said you were Scorpius' Mummy," she says loudly. Rose immediately turns to glare at Nina, and I realize that this was something she wasn't supposed to tell. Both Mum and Dad look at Rose. Her face turns the shade of Hugo's hair.

"Rose is correct, I am Scorpius' mother," Astoria tells Nina.

Nina's eyebrows furrow. "Then why does Scorpius call Mummy 'Mummy' and not you? And then why don't you live with us? Mummy is Scorpius' Mummy," Nina says.

Astoria gives her a stiff smile. "Well, things like this are quite difficult to understand at your age," Astoria tells her kindly.

"But, I'm six," Nina protests.

Astoria nearly chokes. Quickly, she recovers and gives Nina an interested look. "You're six? My, you're almost a young lady! I expect you'll be seven soon?"

Nina shakes her head. "Not until February," she tells Astoria. "That's when my birthday is." I can tell by Astoria's eyes that she's thinking intently about something. A tiny smirk crosses her face and she locks eyes with Dad.

"Nina, I do believe you never cleaned your room from earlier today," Mum says hurriedly. "Isobelle, won't you go help her?" I can tell that Mum's trying to get Nina out of the room.

"Yes, Mum. Come on, Nina, let's get your room cleaned up," I say, gesturing for my youngest sister to get up.

"We had a tea party in my room!" Nina explains to Astoria.

Astoria grins at her. "And here you are, having tea again. It was great to meet you, Nina."

"You too!"

"Come on," I say again, quietly.

"Oh, and Isobelle?" Astoria calls sweetly. Slowly, and begrudgingly, I turn around. I know that Astoria is only pretending to be so kind. She isn't capable of being a genuinely loving person. She's made that clear. When our eyes meet, I notice that taunting look she has, and it assures me that she hasn't changed a bit. "It's absolutely wonderful to see you again."

* * *

**(A/N: So, Astoria's back! And she's playing nice! Really excited for the story to have her back. I enjoyed writing this chapter as though I hate Astoria, she is one of my favorite characters to write. I hope I did this chapter justice! Predictions on what's going to happen with Astoria? Thoughts, opinions? Let me know! Thanks for reading, **_**LEAVE A REVIEW! **_**Let's see if we can get to 100! :)**


	7. Bring You Down

**(J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!)**

***Title of this song comes from 'Bleeding Out' by the Imagine Dragons! It's great!**

_****Thanks for reading and leave a review please! :)**_

* * *

"Holden, must you sing so loudly?" I question, laying on the edge of his bed. He insists on bringing the wireless in the bathroom with him while he showers. I don't think I'd object if he wasn't such a terrible singer.

"I must," Holden shouts back. The shower water stops running, amplifying his voice. It makes me cringe.

"Could you at least be on key, then?" I request politely.

"If I'm kind enough to serenade you, Belle, the least you could do is appreciate it," Holden tells me irritably.

"Believe me, I'm trying. I really am."

Holden opens the door, towelling off his hair. "Quit checking me out..." He mutters, smirking.

"I'm at perfect liberty to ogle you in all your shirtless glory if I want," I inform Holden.

"You little minx," Holden mutters. He leans forward to kiss me, and I'm fully prepared for it, until he unexpectedly tuns around. "I used to love this song..." So much for snogging.

Holden backs away from me and starts dancing quite terribly off-beat. Merlin, he wasn't blessed with any sort of rhythm.

"You're such a bad dancer," I tell him, shaking my head. Still, somehow, I can't help but smile.

"I know. You can't let me look ridiculous all by myself," Holden informs me.

"It's just you and I. I won't tell anyone," I assure him.

Holden grabs my hands and pulls me up, lacing his fingers through mine. "What are you doing?" I question hesitantly.

"Dancing with my lovely girlfriend," Holden answers, giving me that adorably dumb expression of his. He looks into my eyes for a while, and I enjoy being met with the contented expression in them. I haven't seen it a lot lately.

"You can't really dance to this music," I tell Holden. Be that as it may, he sure is trying.

"Well, obviously none of that ballroom rubbish," Holden agrees, rolling his eyes at the thought of it. "But we're not doing that."

"What exactly _are_ we doing?"

Holden shrugs. "Dunno. That's what's fun about it." He takes my hand and spins me around, then brings me flush against his chest. I grin at Holden. This moment reminds me of the time Astoria hosted a ball at the Manor, and I invited Holden to be my date. That night was the first time he kissed me, and it was one of the best nights of my entire life. Even though we barely knew each other, I was sure in that moment that I felt something special for him. I wasn't wrong.

"Seven years and you still haven't become a better dancer," I tell Holden, smiling still. He smiles back and gives me a kiss, drawing it out as long as he possibly can.

"I'll be better at our wedding," He informs me nonchalantly.

I look up at him, knowing I must have misheard. "Did you just say...?"

Holden nods. "Yep." Before I can hold it in, I burst out laughing. Holden must be utterly insane. "What's funny about that?" He asks.

"You think we're going to get married?" I question, trying to tone down my grin.

"Someday, obviously," Holden answers truthfully. "Why don't you think I'm serious?"

"Oh, I believe you're one-hundred percent serious. It's just that... you can't marry me," I tell Holden, still feeling a pang of shock in my chest. The thought of marrying Holden never occurred to me. It's a little surprising to think that it was on _his _mind, though.

Holden's dark eyebrows knit together. "I can't? Why's that?" he asks.

"Because I won't let you. Why would you want to marry me anyway?"

"I love you, Isobelle," Holden answers, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

"You don't have to marry me to prove that. I know that you love me," I tell Holden, giving his hands a reassuring squeeze. "Getting married isn't all it seems."

Holden frowns. "What do you mean?" I know he's a bit upset, but he won't outright say anything.

"Marriages just put strain on relationships. We're perfectly happy now, we don't have to do anything to change that. Besides, a lot of marriages end in divorce," I remind Holden.

"Well, a lot of them don't," he counters, giving me a wary look. "And why does that even matter? Do you think we're going to break up?"

"No, I don't think that! Look, this is stupid-"

"It's _not_ stupid. What's going on with you?"

"Nothing's going on, I just don't want to marry you. Plain and simple," I answer.

Holden looks at me odd. I really don't understand what his fascination with marriage is. Isn't the woman supposed to be obsessed with getting married? I for one, have no interest. "Glad to know where we stand," he mutters sarcastically.

"You know that I have enough on my mind, and I'm not in any sort of mood to put a wedding on top of that. Thanks for understanding," I mutter.

"Understanding? That's all I ever do is 'understand' you!" Holden reminds me, raising his voice slightly. I don't want to argue with him over something so trivial, but it's obviously very important to him. Too important, I might add.

"You knew what you were getting into when you started dating me. I reminded you _constantly!_" I argue back, stepping away from Holden. "This is exactly what I'm talking about. If we're arguing about _getting_ married, the actual thing is going to be ten times worse."

"Don't blame _me_ for this! God, Belle, don't you get it? You're so hung up on everything else that we can't even have a proper relationship anymore! You're always crying, or drinking, or yelling... and I'm the one who has to deal with it. You're clingy. I love you, but you're getting-"

"I'm getting _what_, Holden? Are you getting tired of me? Is that it? Or am I just annoying you? If I'm so damn clingy, why the hell do you want to marry me, then? If you wanted a normal relationship, you should have gotten with a normal _person!_" I yell back. "You knew that!"

"That doesn't make it any less frustrating!"

I sigh and put my hand on my forehead. "You just don't get it, do you? You see, this is why I talk to Teddy about these sorts of things..."

Holden gives me a look he never has before. I know he's terribly angry at me, and I don't think it's only because of a wedding. "Then if you can talk to Teddy so much better than you can talk to me, maybe you should marry _him_!" Holden shouts.

I glare at Holden. It isn't as effective considering I have to crane my neck a bit to look at him. He doesn't even realize how foul that statement is, or what it means to me. "_What_ did you say?" I demand. I heard Holden perfectly fine, but I'm giving him a chance to correct himself before he regrets it.

"Belle, you heard me. You're always talking about how terrible your life is at home, and now you have the chance to get away from it. No one's making you stay there."

"I don't have to stay _here_, either," I retort, turning and walking away from Holden. I grab my wand from the bedside table and stomp out of the bedroom.

"What are you doing?" Holden questions, following me.

"I'm getting my shoes and my cloak, and I'm leaving," I answer, not turning around. Holden grabs my arm. "Let me go. Don't bother me right now."

"So you're going to get mad at me and just leave?"

"What in Merlin's name else should I do, Holden? You obviously don't care enough anymore to try and sympathize with me about any of this! I refuse to marry you, and you get angry and deny me any sort of explanation? I love you! You think I don't want to marry you just because? I have a reason _why!_ I have four younger siblings!" I remind Holden, raising my voice.

"Well, I have a sister," Holden points out, blatantly unaware of what that has to do with anything.

"Yes, well you and Grace got a hell of a lot better of a life than I did! You knew who both your parents were! My brothers and sisters need me to understand them! I can't just up and leave, Holden! I can't put myself in a situation I'm not ready for!" I tell him.

"What do you mean 'not ready'? We've been together for a while now," Holden says, looking confused. Does he honestly believe the amount of time he's been with me means I'm any more ready to get married?

"That doesn't mean I'm in any place to marry you! Look at me, Holden. I've got absolutely _nothing_ going for myself! You know what my parents say, and you know what your parents say, too! For Merlin's sake, your father _hates_ me!" Holden's father and I don't really get along too well. It isn't that we ever argue, because he doesn't even speak to me. His dislike for me is apparent in his face, and Holden always has to force him to be civil toward me.

"Your dad hates me, too!" Holden points out indignantly. "And _he's_ more upfront about it! I haven't complained once!"

"At least it's because he doesn't want you to hurt me! My dad doesn't think you're a bad person at all! He's just protective of me! Your father hates me because of who I _am_!" I argue back.

"He does not! My family doesn't hate people because of such petty differences! It's archaic and backwards!" Holden jeers.

I shake my arm free of Holden's grasp. I know that's meant to be a comment about my family. Those things are only okay when I say them, or at least someone who knows the first thing about their _own_ damned family. "I wouldn't be so quick to say anything if I were you! Your family is just as bad as mine!"

Holden looks as if he wants to laugh. "That's really funny, Belle! That's _hilarious, _actually! How the hell is my family _anything_ like yours?"

"Your father was a Death Eater, too!" I scream. Holden's face goes slack and he stares at me blankly. It takes me a second to realize what I've just said. Holden looks like he's just been slapped across the face. I can tell that he thinks I'm lying, but who would call someone a Death Eater out of the blue?

"What are you talking about?" Holden demands. I don't even feel like I can answer him, I'm so shocked with myself. Seven years and I haven't even _thought_ of saying anything, and now I get angry over something at stupid as a wedding and blurt that out?

"I... I..." I stammer, backing away from Holden. I can feel tears welling up in my eyes. No matter how upset I am, I would never want to hurt him.

Holden rolls his eyes. "Don't do_ that _now! Tell me what you just said!" He yells, his eyes boring into mine.

"I... I h-have to go..." I cry, stepping back some more. Holden reaches for me again, and I can't help but disapparate before he makes contact. I know I can't explain myself to him, and I'm upset at the thought that I may have just permanently ruined Holden's relationship with his father. Hopefully, I didn't ruin my relationship with him as well.

* * *

When I get home, I try to run upstairs quickly so that no one sees I'm upset. I'm sure they've got enough on their plates what with Astoria being back, and I wouldn't want to add to that.

"Isobelle?" Mum asks quietly, sticking her head out of the sitting room door. "Are you alright?" I can't hold it in. I shake my head, biting back tears. "What's wrong?" Mum waves me over.

"Holden and I got into a fight," I answer, my voice coming out as a whisper.

"About what?" I look over to see Dad sitting on the sofa, reading the _Prophet. _This is just bloody great.

"He said he wanted to marry me," I answer, taking a seat. Mum and Dad share a confused look. Dad seems to be a bit angry.

"Well, that's good, isn't it?" Mum questions hesitantly. Merlin, if only she knew.

I shake my head. "I told him no," I respond, suddenly taking quite an interest in my shoes.

Mum furrows her eyebrows. "Why did you do that?" She asks, looking bewildered.

"Because she's finally gone and got some sense, Hermione. She's only twenty-one," Dad reminds Mum. I can tell by the tone of Dad's voice that they were having a serious talk before I interfered. I'm sure some arguing was involved.

"I don't think he meant right away," I tell Dad hurriedly. "He meant someday, but naturally, I had to go and open my large mouth and ruin everything." I bury my face in my hands. I can't stop thinking about it. How could I have said such a thing to Holden, or even lost control for that matter?

"What did you ruin?" Mum questions.

"Probably the idea of Holden wanting to speak to me for a while," I mutter, shaking my head.

"How did you do that?"

"'Toldimhisdaswasadeatheater..." I mutter in one long breath.

"You did what?" Dad questions. I can feel his heavy gaze on my back.

"I told Holden his father was a Death Eater," I say louder, and much slower. It pains me to hear myself admit that, and it hurts a lot more to think that I actually did it.

Mum looks absolutely appalled. "Isobelle, why would you lie to Holden like that? No matter how angry you are, you can't just make up things like that! You don't know how seriously Holden might take you!" She says. I only wish I'd made it up.

By the expression on Dad's face, it appears that he wants to choke me. "She isn't lying, Hermione," Dad says, giving me a terrible glare. "How could you tell him that? Isobelle, what did I say to you?"

"I didn't mean to say anything! I was angry, and I-"

"And you had to say the first thing that came to mind? Isobelle, I trust you could have been more mature than that!" Dad shouts. "And now, I suppose I'll have to deal with Holden's father, now won't I? He'll probably be wondering the hell you even knew!"

"You'll have to tell him the truth then, won't you? I don't know why he'd be so shocked to hear it!" I retort.

"Don't take this out on _me,_ Isobelle! Perhaps if you knew how to think before you spoke, you wouldn't be in this predicament!" I turn away from Dad. I'm already upset enough on my own, he doesn't need to make it worse.

"Draco, don't yell at her," Mum says quietly. "What exactly is going on?"

I can tell by the silence hanging in the air that Mum's question is directed toward me. "We got into an argument," I answer.

"I've gathered that much already. Would you like to elaborate?" I can tell that it isn't really an offer.

"I told Holden I wouldn't ever want to marry him, I didn't see any sort of point in it. He got upset about it, because if I don't want to marry him, that apparently means that I don't _love_ him either. And then I pointed out that his father doesn't like me, and then he reminded me that _you_ don't like him either. He thinks it's because or blood or whatever an dI knew that wasn't true and I sort of- said it," I explain.

"Holden's father was a Death Eater?" Mum questions, looking appalled. Dad and I nod. "Draco, you never told-"

"It wasn't my business to tell. Nor was it Isobelle's," Dad replies begrudgingly, giving me a scathing glance.

Mum crosses her arms and begins pacing the length of the room. "I think it is your business, as my _husband_, to tell me when Isobelle's dating the son of a former Death Eater! I believe I should know that," Mum says, giving Dad a steely gaze. I can tell that they aren't on such good terms with each other right now.

"It isn't my business as Isobelle's _father_ to tell you anything like that? Besides, I was a Death Eater myself, Hermione! You can't believe William would be of any danger to her, when she's living with me just as well!" Dad argues, glaring at Mum.

Mum stops pacing and stares at Dad. "Draco, you know that isn't what I mean! I believe that there are some things I should just know! Like how, apparently, Astoria is back in the picture! It would have been nice of you to mention that aspect!" Mum reminds Dad, stepping closer to him. I know she has the right to be furious about not knowing, but does she really have to argue with him about it? Mum and Dad have the absolute _worst_ arguments that involve shouting and wild hand-waving and slamming doors, and only-speaking-when-the-children-are-around for days. The thing is, they have no qualms over arguing right in front of me.

"My apologies, Hermione! I believe I had time to figure out what to say to you! I had no idea she was going to be stepping into our _home_ yesterday!" Dad says defensively.

"That doesn't matter! You should have told me the _instant _you knew there was even a possibility of it happening! You know what kind of woman Astoria is, she has to be prepared for!"

"Merlin, Hermione! You say that as if she's some bloody test! Not everything can be prepared for! Some things just happen, and that's the way it is!"

"Stop it, _both_ of you!" I say finally, getting thoroughly fed up. I've had it with arguments for the day. "Holden's already upset with me, and I don't need the two of you arguing as well! Mum, Dad didn't tell you Holden's father was a Death Eater because no one was supposed to know! He just told me, and I haven't told anyone else. I wasn't supposed to tell Holden. I wasn't supposed to mess things up..."

Mum sighs and gives Dad an apologetic look. I suppose they silently agree that they can put their arguing aside for a while if it means just listening to me. "Isobelle, I highly doubt Holden could have said anything to make you _that_ angry, is it something else?" She asks gently.

I shake my head. "No, it's exactly that. You don't know what it feels like to be accused of not loving someone enough!"

"I don't know what that feels like?" Mum questions acerbically, raising an eyebrow at me. It's odd, because I know I make the exact face so many times. I'd forgotten about her divorce from Ron. From how he acted around me, I could easily tell that he really was terrible for her. Ron was possessive and rude. Mum's a lot of things, but she isn't either of those.

"I'm sorry. But you _don't_ understand how much I love Holden. I do everything I possibly can to make things work between us! And then he said... he..."

"He _what_?" Dad questions dangerously, leaning forward. I hate relaying our conversation to anyone else, but I'm really speaking to Mum more than I am Dad.

"He said he doesn't like my behavior. Like how I'm always upset about things, and that's why we can't have a normal relationship," I say dismally.

Mum purses her lips, and I can tell she's trying to make light of this. Dad, on the other hand, is absolutely infuriated. "He has no right to tell you how to act! You see, I _knew_ it, Hermione! I knew it from the beginning that that boy-"

"Dad!" I say quickly. "We were arguing! You know I didn't mean to be upset at him and he didn't mean to be upset at me, either! He loves me Dad, he really does."

"Isobelle, someone who loves you doesn't blame the problems in your relationship on just _you_. It doesn't happen," Dad informs me coolly.

I know Holden's angry at me, but thinking about it, I sort of riled him up, so I sort of feel the need to defend him. Maybe, if things were different, I would have been just as hurt if Holden said he had no intention of marrying me. "Well, Dad, you and Mum are always saying that I'm irresponsible and I'm always doing things I shouldn't. Maybe if you're sick of dealing with it, Holden is too? Or maybe it's not just that, he has to comfort me all the time, and I'm sure he has bad days, too, but he has to put all that aside. That isn't really fair," I say thoughtfully.

Mum and Dad glance at each other, then at me. "It isn't your job to rationalize his behavior," Mum tells me. I know it's hard for her to say, because she and Holden are very close. She's known him a lot longer than she's known me.

"But I know Holden loves me. He just wants to make me aware, but he keeps all those things pent up inside him and then he just sort of lets it all out. I egged him on a bit, really, I did. You know how much Holden and I mean to each other, I couldn't possibly live without him-"

"Isobelle, that isn't true. I don't ever want to hear that again," Dad says firmly. "About _anyone_. Especially someone who believes it acceptable to speak to you that way."

"You and Mum say the same things to me," I point out.

"We're your _parents,_" Dad reminds me.

"I know that, but Holden's just as important. Besides, how would you feel if someone told you that they didn't want to marry you? I'm thinking it over, and maybe I was wrong to Holden..."

"If you aren't ready to marry him, then you shouldn't change your mind because you feel pressured," Mum advises. I know I'm not in any place to get married, I'm just thinking I could have handled the situation a different way.

"I don't feel pressured. But I know Holden loves me, and I feel terrible that maybe he doesn't think I feel the exact same way."

Dad shakes his head. "Well, no one can make up your mind but you. If that's honestly how you feel, there's nothing I can do about that." I know that he's frustrated with me, but I wish he would just understand. I've faced so many issues with my parents, and it just seems as if Holden was always there for me. It seems as if we've been separating just a bit lately, and I can't bear the thought of something like that being permanent. Who else would love me?

"You two just don't understand," I tell Mum and Dad, standing up.

"What don't we understand, Isobelle?" Mum questions.

"You should be happy that we're 'actually defending you for once', as you so often put it," Dad mutters.

"You shouldn't be defending me about this. We've only had a few arguments, you and Mum argue all the time. You're acting as if Holden's beating me or something!"

"A few?" Mum questions, looking at me dubiously. "Isobelle-"

"Just forget it," I mutter. "You two have other things to deal with. You don't understand how much Holden loves me." Mum and Dad must think that the way Holden loves me is the same way that they love me. They're wrong. It's very different. At least it is to me.

* * *

I feel absolutely terrible about pushing my problems onto Teddy, but I need someone else to talk to. I don't think Teddy would ever have the nerve to call me clingy or say any of the things to me that Holden did. I know Holden didn't mean to hurt me, but he did. I can't let my parents know that.

"Hey, Isobelle... what's wrong?" Teddy asks, giving me a look of concern when he takes in my expression.

"It's Holden," I say quietly.

"Teddy, who's at the-" Victoire walks into the living room and frowns slightly when she sees me. Ever since we've met, Victoire and I haven't been on the best of terms. It even escalated to violence once. "Oh, er... hi, Isobelle."

"Hello, Victoire," I reply as civilly as I can manage. I turn to Teddy. "I didn't know Victoire was over. I didn't mean to interrupt-"

"It's okay. I was just leaving," Victoire tells me, giving Teddy a look. "I need to go anyway, love. Apparently, Louis has gotten himself into some sort of trouble." Victoire gives Teddy a quick kiss before disapparating. She doesn't so much as glance in my direction.

"I'm sorry, Teddy, I really am," I apologize. It seems that I've got the most terrible timing.

Teddy shakes his head. "Don't worry about it. It's fine. What's up with Holden?"

"I told him about his father," I blurt out.

Teddy's eyes widen in shock. "No, Belle, you didn't..."

"I did," I nod sadly. "We got in a huge argument, and we both said some pretty terrible things to each other. You know how it's been."

Teddy runs his hand through his turquoise hair. "Erm... sit," he tells me. "Now, how exactly did this come about?"

I sigh. "Well, apparently Holden's got it somewhere in his head that we're going to be married. He told me he wanted to marry me."

Teddy's eyebrows wrinkle. "You told him no, didn't you?" He guesses.

"Yes, I- I was surprised, I didn't think that Holden would ever want to marry me. I certainly never thought of being married. And when I told him that, he got really upset. He told me that if I didn't want to marry him, that meant I thought we were going to break up. But that isn't true, Teddy, you know that isn't true."

Teddy nods understandingly. "I know that's not true," He confirms. "But how did that lead to you saying what you said?"

"I told him it was stupid for us to be arguing about marriage, and he got angry over that. And then I told him that wasn't being understanding. He told me that he gets frustrated with me because we can't have a normal relationship and I'm 'clingy'. I told Holden that you understand me a lot more than he does, and he suggested that I marry _you_ instead."

Teddy's head snaps up. "Did you say anything?" He questions.

"No," I assure him. "I didn't mention it. But things went back and forth for a while, he made a comment about my family, and then I sort of just, _said it_," I explain. "The look on Holden's face, it was just _terrible_. I hate myself for saying it."

Teddy's silent for a long while. I don't know if he's upset with me for not keeping my mouth shut, or if he's just trying to think of something to say. It must be hard on him when Holden and I argue. Teddy's been best friends with Holden most of his life, and I'm his cousin. He's caught in the middle. "Don't be mad at yourself. You were angry, and Holden said some things to you, too," Teddy tells me.

"But they're true, I guess that's why I was so upset," I admit.

"You're not clingy," Teddy assures me. "You just love Holden, and you've never been with anyone else." Exactly.

"Is that bad?" I ask self-consciously. I've always known that most women don't stay with their first boyfriends for the rest of their lives, but I've never given it any kind of thought. Holden and I can't possibly be growing apart. No, we just had a silly argument. He still loves me. I know I still love him.

Teddy shakes his head. "No, of course not," he assures me.

Teddy and I look at each other for a while. Finally, I burst into an uncontrollable fit of tears. I don't feel as bad about crying in front of Teddy as I do Holden. Teddy doesn't seem to mind it. But then again, since Teddy's been around people who have lost so much, and he's lost so much himself, he knows exactly what heartbreak feels like. Sometimes, I think that's the biggest difference between Holden and I. He's never known how to be without anything. Teddy pulls me closer to him in a hug. I put my head on his shoulder and cry some more, until I feel better.

"Why can't he be a bit more like you?" I ask quietly, sniffling. "Holden, I mean."

Teddy encouragingly puts his hand on my upper arm. "Belle, you love Holden the way he is. You know that."

I know that's true, but everyone has their less-than-desirable qualities. "I know I love him. But there are some qualities that I absolutely love in you, too," I tell Teddy. "You're understanding, and you know what it's like to go through hard things. And you never lose your temper with me."

Teddy glances at me thoughtfully. "Holden knows, too. I think sometimes, he just has a harder time showing it. But you know he can be understanding when he really needs to be," Teddy reminds me. I couldn't possibly ever admit it, but sometimes, I resent Victoire for being able to be so _close_ to Teddy. In my opinion, she doesn't even deserve him.

"I suppose. Teddy, do you think Holden's starting to grow tired of me?" I question quietly.

Teddy moistens his lips. "If he wants to marry you, then I wouldn't think so."

Teddy makes a good point, but I don't know why I'm not exactly convinced. "You're right, but it seems as if he always has to deal with my family's problems. I didn't even tell him about Astoria," I realize. That would have just been another issue of mine that Holden would have had to listen to.

"How did that go?" Teddy questions.

If I wasn't in such a terrible mood, I would laugh. Does he really need to ask? "Astoria's still a manipulative bitch like she always was. She's got it in her head that she still has every right to be Scorpius' mother. The thing is, she's super sweet to him, and Scorpius loves her," I huff, rolling my eyes. For the past two days, Scorpius has talked on and on about Astoria. I've been thinking about sticking pins in my ears, rather than having to listen to him anymore.

"Has she spoken to you yet?" Teddy asks.

"Yeah. That's how I know she hasn't changed. She was just as nasty to me as she's always been. But in front of everyone else, she suddenly got nicer, if it can even be called that. I'm not buying it, though. I know she's putting on a face for Scorpius. I know that much," I answer.

Teddy gives me a look. "You don't think she cares about Scorpius?"

I shake my head. "I think Astoria loved Dad at one point, but I don't think she ever loved Scorpius. She just had him because our family needed an heir," I say. It saddens me to admit that, but it's the truth. From a young age, I knew there was something about the way Astoria was always so distant from Scorpius. Even though I didn't have a mother of my own to go off of, I still knew that was wrong.

"Poor guy," Teddy mutters sympathetically. Actually, Scorpius has never known how Astoria really feels. Other than they day she left, which Scorpius doesn't even remember, she's never gone outright and said she didn't want him. When he was five, Scorpius was too young to understand any of Astoria's underhanded comments toward him. "How's Rose about all this?"

"Rose? I don't know, she hasn't really said anything about it. She seems to think Astoria is alright enough. But I think she's anxious to meet Ron again, more anxious than Hugo. He gets on with Dad too well," I answer. Oddly enough, Dad and Ron couldn't stand each other, and Mum says Hugo is so much like Ron. Hugo's a lot nicer, though.

"And Nina?" Teddy asks finally. "I swear, she's got more energy than Fred and Roxanne ever had combined." Fred and Roxanne are Hugo, Nina, and Rose's cousins. I only met them once, and I must say, they were energetic little buggers, the both of them. I think they're only a year or two older than Rose. I can't be sure, though, I only met the extended Weasley family once. When Mum divorced Ron and married Dad, all of them stopped speaking to her, except for Uncle Harry's family. It must have been torture for Rose to see some of them at school. I hope they weren't nasty to her.

"I don't know what she really thinks about all this. You know, she's got better things to worry about like princesses and faeries, and whatnot," I reply, smiling in spite of myself. Teddy chuckles quietly.

"What I wouldn't give to be that age again," he says longingly. I couldn't agree more. Age six was probably the last year of my life that I fully enjoyed.

One thing did really bother me about Astoria, though: The way she asked about Nina's age, as if it meant something to her. I lost an entire night of sleep trying to think of it, and I finally came to a conclusion that I'm sure my parents haven't even thought of yet. Mum got pregnant with her by Ron about seven years ago, while they were still married. Ron and Mum divorced before Dad and Astoria did. So that would mean for Nina to really be Dad's he would have had to cheat on Astoria. I know Astoria isn't going to step up and say anything about it, though. Being the snake she is, she's going to find a way to hold it over Dad as some kind of leverage. I wouldn't expect anything different.

"What is it?" Teddy questions, noticing the thought in my eyes. I decide not to worry him anymore. Besides, he doesn't know the truth about Nina.

"It's nothing," I say to Teddy, leaning over and giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks for being here for me."

* * *

**(A/N: Hope you all liked the chapter! So yeah, I think that Holden would secretly be a bit frustrated with Belle. No matter how understanding, I feel like that would happen. And Teddy's honestly in a better place to understand Belle than he is. I think they're close on a different level than Belle and Holden are. Surprisingly, so one picked up on the thing about when Hermione got pregnant with Nina, and I thought a lot of you would point that out. Anyway, hope you liked the chapter. PLEASE REVIEW! Let's get to 100 :)**


	8. Tell Me That You Need Me

***Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling!**

****So sorry I haven't updated in like two weeks! I've been having some really big problems with my spine lately, and after I came home from the orthopedists' and everything, I haven't been able to do much until they can find out what's wrong with it. But I **_**am**_** okay for the time being!****

***** Title of this chapter comes from "Apologize" by One Republic. Oldie but Goodie! Happy reading! :)**

* * *

"Belle," A soft voice says, making me stir. I open my eyes sleepily, eager to apologize to Holden over the absolutely terrible argument we had yesterday. When I'm accustomed to the bright light in the bedroom, I realize that is isn't Holden's room_. _Nor is it mine. I don't have blue curtains. I sit up and look around frantically. Where the hell am I?

"Easy there," Teddy says calmly, resting a hand on my shoulder. . There are a lot of pictures on his night stand. There's even one of Teddy, Holden and I on my seventeenth birthday. I was so excited to become an adult, I didn't think it would be anything like this.

I look at him for a while, until I realize that I'm in _his_ room and in _his_ bed "Teddy, you didn't... did you?" I ask, frowning.

Teddy looks at me as if I'm mad, then he shakes his head. "No, I slept on the couch," he answers. "You seemed tired after yesterday. I didn't mind it."

Still, I feel terrible for forcing Teddy onto his sofa. "Oh, I'm sorry," I apologize.

Teddy shrugs. "No big deal. How're you feeling?"

"Better, I suppose. I don't think Holden's going to speak to me though, no matter how much I want him to," I answer, my eyes downcast. I still feel incredibly guilty for saying what I said to Holden. "I guess I really am alone now."

"What do you mean?" Teddy frowns, sitting down on the bed beside me.

"Mum and Dad are too busy trying to raise four children, and now they're dealing with Astoria and whatnot. They don't have time for me. And now I'm sure I've completely burned a bridge with Holden..." I answer.

Teddy puts his arm around me. "You have me," He reminds me.

I shake my head. "I know, but I can't always expect you to make time for me. You've got to spend time with Victoire, and I wouldn't want her to hate me more than she already does. And look, I've already overstayed my welcome. I've kicked you out of your bed. I couldn't possibly expect you to-"

"You're family," Teddy reminds me. "I'll always have time for you. Especially when you need me."

"I don't always _want _to need you. I don't want to have to depend on anyone. That's why Holden doesn't really want me anymore. He feels like I need him too much," I explain. Even though it's the last thing I want, I do feel like I _am_ hopelessly clingy. Not just with Holden, but with everyone. I can't bear the thought of not having someone else with me to depend on. It scares me that I feel as if I'd do nearly _anything_ to keep Holden from leaving me. I don't always want to be like that.

"You guys just had one argument. Holden still loves you," Teddy assures me for the fiftieth time. "Maybe he shouldn't have said some of those things, but I don't doubt he cares about you."

"Holden's your best friend. I don't want you to be in the middle," I tell Teddy. I won't let Teddy ruin his relationship with Holden because I've possibly ruined _my_ relationship with Holden.

"I'm not in the middle. Isobelle, Holden knows everything that's happened to you. He can't use that against you, no matter what," Teddy tells me.

"I used the way Holden's father was against _him_," I point out guiltily.

"That's different," Teddy says. I don't know how, but I go along with it. "Why are you so afraid of committing to Holden anyway? If you don't want him to leave you, it seems like marriage would be the way to go."

Teddy's terribly wrong. "I just... I think that if I were to marry Holden, he would want a family and... I can't give him that," I admit sadly. The thought of it has bothered me a while, not that I've wanted to tell anyone.

Teddy looks at me alarmingly. "What do you mean?" he asks.

"Not _that._ What I mean is that I couldn't ever be somebody's mother," I cry. "Look at me. I'm a mess. I don't even have myself together, how could I ever raise a _child_?" Holden's mentioned having a family once or twice. Whether that ever included me or not, I wasn't sure. I just kept my mouth shut about my fears regarding that scenario, assuming it did. Considering that I never really had a mother growing up, I don't at all know how to be one.

"Those things take time, Isobelle. Of course you aren't ready now, but given time, I think you'd make an amazing mother," Teddy tells me sincerely.

"But, I don't know the first thing about parenting," I protest.

"Look at Harry. He didn't know either, but he's brilliant with Lily, James, and Al. And me too at one point, I suppose," Teddy points out.

"I know, but Uncle Harry's a lot stronger than I am," I tell Teddy.

Teddy looks at me for a while. "You're very strong, Belle. Maybe you don't see it, but I do. Who else could go through all that rubbish you do and still be here today?"

"I almost wasn't," I mutter under my breath, thinking of a terrible time.

Teddy squeezes my shoulder. "Don't think about that. You're here now, that's all that matters. And I'm glad you are."

I smile at Teddy. It's the first time I've genuinely smiled since yesterday morning. "Thanks. I really needed that," I tell him.

"It's no problem."

I glance at the alarm clock on Teddy's nightstand. "I suppose I've got to be home soon. Mum and Dad will be wondering where I am, and I promised Rose I'd take her to Flourish and Blotts today. She only went a couple of days ago, and now she wants more books," I say to Teddy.

Teddy grins and shakes his head. "Gets it from Aunt Hermione, she does. I swear, she spent half her time in the library at school."

I frown, realizing that I haven't really thought much about Rose and Scorpius' first year at Hogwarts. I listened when they told me about it, but they didn't really _say_ much. "How was she this year? Rose, I mean," I ask Teddy.

"Fine, she had some of the highest marks in her class," Teddy answers.

"Not her marks. How _was_ she? I know some of her cousins are at Hogwarts, too, and I know how the other Weasleys feel about us," I explain. To put it kindly, they would like to avoid us at all costs, and they do a good job of it. I doesn't bother Scorpius, Nina, or I, but I know it must be a lot harder on Hugo and Rose. Especially Rose.

"None of them talked to Rose," Teddy answers finally. "Well, not once that I saw anyway."

It angers me to think that Rose's own _cousins,_ her family that she knows personally, would choose to ignore her all based on who her mother married. It isn't Rose's fault that Mum married Dad, and she's the one being punished for it.

"That's absolutely terrible. As if it's Rose's fault! I'm sure the lot of them don't have any home-training anyway," I scoff. Why else would they behave that way? That's right, because their parents were apparently raised the same. People shouldn't _ever_ be judged based on their parents' choices. I know how terrible that feels.

I know Teddy's trying to stay out of this, because he is very close to the Weasleys. But at the same time, _I'm _the one who's actually related to Teddy, not any of those Weasleys. "It is kind of sad," Teddy agrees finally. "At least Rose has Scorpius and Al." Scorpius, Rose, and Al are all best friends. Al's quite a frequent guest at the Manor, and Scorpius and Rose are over at Uncle Harry's just as often. I think their friendships have caused Dad and Uncle Harry to get along reasonably well. They aren't exactly friends, but they don't hate each other either.

"You would think if Scorpius hasn't turned Rose and Al into Death Eaters by now, that would be good enough for them," I mutter under my breath. "But, apparently not. I'm just glad to know that ours isn't the only screwed-up family."

Teddy laughs quietly. "Well, I'm sure every family's got their issues," he reasons. "Just some more than others..."

"Yes, and now I've made a problem in Holden's family," I realize, feeling a wave of guilt wash over me again. "I'm sorry, you must be tired of hearing about this."

Teddy shakes his head and moves closer to me. "No, I'm not. If you feel like you need to talk about it, then I'll listen," he tells me, his voice quiet and calm.

I lay my head on Teddy's shoulder. I feel exhausted, as if I didn't really get much sleep last night. "Hey, Belle?" Teddy asks hesitantly.

"Hmm?"

Teddy takes a deep breath. "Er, I never told you this, but your eyes..."

"What about them?" I question, looking at Teddy curiously. What could he possibly say about my eyes?

"They remind me a lot of my mum's," he admits. His voice is so quiet, I can barely hear him.

"But Teddy-"

"I've seen pictures, Belle," Teddy reminds me, his voice a bit tighter than normal. I feel so terrible for him. "They just... make me think of you. I don't know why. Maybe it's the color...maybe it's what I see in them..."

"Teddy, what do you mean?"

"Your eyes always have this inherent sadness in them, as if it's always going to be there, but it doesn't want to be," Teddy explains quietly.

"No one wants to be sad," I point out.

"Well, of course not," Teddy nods. "But people show their emotions in different ways. Your eyes always say everything about you."

Teddy told me once that he never speaks with Victoire about either of his parents because he doesn't feel as if she would care too much about it. That makes me hate Victoire even more, to think that she wouldn't want to listen to Teddy when he's so caring and selfless, and all he ever does is listen to everyone else. But I'm also honored to think that Teddy trusts _me_ to talk about his mother.

I look up at Teddy from my place on his shoulder. "What do my eyes say about me now?" Teddy studies my face for a long while. There isn't any other sound, except for our breathing. I fear for a second that Teddy can't come up with an answer, because he for once has _no_ idea what I'm thinking.

"Do you really love Victoire?" I ask. I don't mean to be rude and question Teddy, but the more I think about it, the less compatible Victoire and Teddy really seem to be.

"I do love her. But sometimes, she frustrates the hell out of me. I just think that sometimes... I need..." Teddy's voice trails off as if he believes whatever he's thinking is stupid. I take his hand.

"You need what, Teddy?" I implore. He turns to me slowly, and his eyes lock with mine. I can't get another thought out of my head before Teddy leans forward and his lips touch mine. He cups my face with his hand, and he wipes one of my tears away. Teddy's kiss feels so different from Holden's. Immediately, I'm disgusted with myself that I'm able to compare the two. I shouldn't even _know_ what Teddy's kiss feels like. Teddy's my _cousin._

Teddy pulls away. His eyes are wide with horror. "Belle, I am _so_ sorry..." He apologizes quickly. I'm not sure what to say so I just stare back at him, equally as shocked. "I'm such a fuck-up... What the hell did I just do?" he rambles, dragging his hand through his hair. His hands are trembling. I'm tremendously conflicted, but I don't want Teddy to take all the blame. I _let_ him kiss me. I'm just as terrible.

"Teddy, it's all right. I won't say anything to anyone," I promise him. I know Teddy didn't _mean_ to kiss me. I was just... _there._ Sometimes, that's all it takes.

Teddy won't look at me. "Belle, I think you should go," he mutters.

I stand there like an idiot until I realize he's kicking me out. "Oh... um, okay. Goodbye, Teddy..."

Teddy's completely silent, and I can tell he's waiting for me to leave. I disapparate, feeling worse than I did yesterday.

* * *

"Come in," I call, as someone knocks at my door. I'm sitting down at my mirror, my head in my hands, my hair half-done. I can't stop thinking about what happened between Teddy and I. It only dawned on me a couple of minutes ago that by kissing Teddy, I cheated on Holden. That was something that when I was just fourteen, I swore I would _never _do. The door opens, and in walks Rose. Just the sibling I wanted to see. "Rose," I say, forcing a smile at my little sister. Rose gives me a small smile back.

"Hey, Belle."

"You aren't waiting on me, are you?" I ask, just to make sure. I do have a terrible thing for taking forever to get ready.

Rose shakes her head. "Well, not really, no," she answers. "Belle?" Rose asks.

"Yes?" I ask quickly, feeling a bit panicked.

"Why don't you ever wear your hair down anymore? Doesn't it take forever to always put it up like that?"

I let out a sight of relief. "Not really, I'm used to it. Besides, I'm a woman, Rose. I've got to dress like it, don't I?" I question, sliding a silver barrette into my hair and finishing it. Something inside me says that a woman wouldn't go around cheating on her boyfriend, or kissing her own cousin at that.

Rose shrugs. "I guess so. But you're always so dressed up. It's kind of... weird," she tells me, gesturing to my robes. I've actually gone for a rather plain set today. "Must be an awful lot for Holden to take off."

My jaw clenches momentarily, but I don't mention anything to Rose. "I am _not_ dressed up!" I snap. "I only seem dressed up because you're so used to running around in those dreadful trousers! I still can't believe Mum lets you wear them." I roll my eyes at the thought. Mum doesn't even know she's encouraging Rose to dress like a boy, especially with those horrible muggle jeans she lets her wear.

"It's called being comfortable, not that you would know anything about that," Rose explains sarcastically, huffing. "If you don't want to take me to Flourish and Blotts, just say so."

"I'm plenty comfortable, thank you. And of course, I want to take you. I'm just... a bit tired. You could at least put on a muggle dress if you don't want to wear robes," I try to compromise.

Rose looks at me in disgust. "No way I'm putting on a dress," she assures me. "How about _you_ wear one?"

"Muggle dresses made for people my age barely cover anything," I tell Rose. "I do have some self resp- never mind it. How about you brush your hair at least?" I gesture to Rose's messy braid. It looks as if she slept in it.

"Belle, I look fine. We're just going to Flourish and Blotts, it's not like we're meeting anyone special," Rose protests, crossing her arms.

I sigh. "Rose, you're growing up now, and you can't dress the same way you did when you were younger. You'd look so much better if you only did something with your hair and clothes," I tell her. "You're going to be thirteen soon."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Rose questions defensively.

Must I explain everything to her? "Thirteen year old girls do _not _dress like little boys, and my sister certainly won't."

"I'm not dressed like a boy. They're called muggle clothes," Rose informs me bitterly.

"I know what muggle clothes are. I happen to own some."

"You wouldn't know it," Rose mutters. "I don't see why you would like to wear robes all the time."

"Because they're far better than dresses or those stupid jeans you have on. Perhaps if I were in the muggle _world _I would wear muggle _clothes_, but that's not the case," I point out. "At least let me do something with your hair."

Rose groans. "Just because you've learned how to manage _your_ hair..." she grumbles.

"Means I'm at perfect liberty to help you manage yours," I finish. "I don't understand it."

"Understand what?" Rose questions.

"How you can want absolutely nothing to do with anything so feminine, yet you don't enjoy quidditch," I say.

Rose looks at me as if I'm stupid. "Quidditch isn't the only sport, you know," she informs me.

"The only sport that girls can play," I remind her.

"That isn't true!" Rose says fiercely. "I play football with Al, Scor, James, and Lily all the time! That's so sexist!" Rose protests. I wasn't trying to be sexist, I just didn't know. I feel like I don't know much of anything.

"Do girls play football, then?" I ask. Honestly, I've never heard of it. I didn't even know anything about the sport until Rose and Al explained it to me. It seems pointless.

"Of course, they do! They have their own _league _in the muggle world!" Rose tells me.

"Fine, you don't have to get so worked up about it. At least let me do your hair," I plead.

Rose groans and rolls her eyes. "If you'll shut up about it," she concedes.

"I most definitely will," I agree. "Oh, what has Dom taught you?" I ask, brushing Rose's tangled hair. Other than the Potters, we do see the Delacour-Weasleys quite often. I swear, Dom is Rose's idol, her and her feminism. I don't have a problem with it though, because Dominique really is a great friend of mine.

"Dom's taught me that anything a bloke can do, I can do at least _ten _times better. And that Victoire really should cover up her boobs more often," Rose answers, smirking.

From now on, I probably won't even be able to look Victoire in the eye. Still, I can't help but laugh at this. Even though Victoire and Dom are sisters, they're complete opposites, and they don't get along at all. "Dom's taught you well, I see."

Rose nods excitedly. "Yeah. She said if Mum lets me, she'll let me dye part of my hair _purple_ like hers!" she exclaims. _Purple hair?_ Rose won't be able to dye anything if she doesn't get all these knots out.

"Why would you want to do that?" I question, frowning.

"Because it would be awesome! Dom says that it's 'daring and unique'," Rose quotes, exaggerating Dom's animated voice quite a bit.

"And what does Aunt Fleur say?"

Rose rolls her eyes. Like Dominique, she doesn't care for Aunt Fleur. I don't mind her so much. "She always says 'Dominique, why can't you be more like your sister? Why can't you be more like a _girl_?'" Rose answers, doing a bad job of mocking Aunt Fleur's thick French accent. Believe me, I'm asking the same question about Rose.

"And what does Dom say back?" I ask conversationally. From what Rose has told me, I'm sure she'd have some colorful response.

"Um... I'm not sure I should use those words," Rose answers hesitantly. "Watch it with that brush! You're going to rip my bloody head off!"

"Aren't you a little hypocrite?" I question. But then again, so am I. "But anyway, I don't want you to be disrespectful toward Aunt Fleur, no matter what she says to Dominique. understand?"

"Yes," Rose sighs. "But Aunt Fleur is just so terrible. I don't understand how Dom turned out so cool."

"I don't understand it either," I admit. Dominique definitely is the black sheep of her family. Uncle Bill's okay, but I know how he feels about Dad secretly. "You don't like Louis?"

Rose shrugs. "I mean, he's _all right_. He's kind of obsessed with himself, though. And Dom says it's even worse now that he's got himself a new girlfriend," Rose tells me.

"What does she look like this week?" I ask. Louis is known for having a lot of girlfriends. He changes his girlfriends like he changes his underwear.

"She's a muggle-born who models swimsuits in America," Rose says. I frown. I know exactly what American swimsuits look like. They're just undergarments that can get wet. Rose notices the look on my face. "I know, right? Dom says she only does it because her self-esteem is so low, she feels better knowing that there are randy teenage boys out there having a wank to her pictures, and Louis probably one of them."

"Don't say that," I chastise Rose. "I'm going to have to have a little talk with Dom, aren't I? If she's speaking _that_ way around you."

Rose scoffs. "Oh, _please_. I'm not a baby! Besides, it's Scorpius with the foul mouth," she tattles.

"Just as well. As long as the two of you don't start speaking that way around Hugo. And Nina, Merlin forbid. Mum and Dad would have a right fit." My parents absolutely hate it when I even make the tiniest slip of a curse word in front of Nina. She doesn't even pick them up.

"Yeah, yeah. Are you almost done with my hair?" Rose asks impatiently.

"Almost. You should probably cut it if you aren't going to do anything with it. It would be easier to manage," I suggest. Rose's hair is nearly to her bum. I don't think she's had it cut properly in years.

Rose shakes her head. "I'm not cutting my hair. No way. Besides, if I don't, you can have fun making it look all old-timey like yours," she reasons.

"Old-timey? My hair doesn't look old just because I prefer to take it off my face. And besides, I'm done. Take a look, go on."

Rose cranes her neck to look in the mirror. I swept her curls back with my brush and pinned them just so, framing her face. As for the rest of Rose's hair, I put it in a tight braid going from one side of her head to the other so that it rests on her shoulder and tied it with a ribbon. When Rose does something with her hair, it really shows of her round brown eyes. I'm so glad that her eyes are only like mine in color. "It looks so... movie-like," is all Rose says. I know she won't say so, but I can tell she likes it.

"Thanks. See, that didn't take so long, did it?" I question.

"No..." Rose mutters. "Can we go now?"

"Sure. What kind of books are you looking for, anyway?" I ask.

Rose shrugs. "None in particular, I just need something to read while Scorpius is busy with quidditch. You know, he told me about the match with his mum," Rose mentions casually. She doesn't know about all the tension between my family and Astoria. She thinks Dad and Astoria just divorced and parted ways, the same way her parents did.

"Did he tell you anything about it?"

Rose gives me a look like, _don't be stupid_. "Course, he did," she responds. "Why? Are you being nosy again?"

"I'm not being nosy. I'm only curious. Scorpius happens to be my brother, and I'd only like to know how things went with his mother," I tell Rose.

"Oh, just admit you're nosy. I asked the minute he got home, too," Rose tells me, smirking.

"Fine, fine, I'm nosy. So how'd it go?" I question impatiently.

"Well, Scorpius said it was the best match he's ever been to, and that his mum's really great. She does see nice, though. I don't understand why Mum and Dad don't seem to like her," Rose explains. Did she just put the words 'nice' and 'Astoria' in the same sentence? Rose and Scorpius, those poor things. The only thing Astoria's great at is manipulating people.

"When did he come home?" I ask. It's the afternoon now, and I only came home from Teddy's about an hour ago.

"Maybe around eleven. Astoria brought him back. She said she wanted one of us to tell you she said 'hello' and that it seems you're doing better these days," Rose relays.

I have to take a deep breath to calm myself. "I'm sure she did," I deadpan. I hate Astoria for still being able to get to me. I'm not doing _any_ better, and it's all my fault.

Rose wrinkles her eyebrows. "What's that even mean? 'Doing better'? Did you go to the Healers' then, too?" Rose asks curiously.

I decide that it can't really hurt anything to be honest with her. "Not when Astoria lived here, no. I did go when I was a lot younger, though."

"How young?" Rose wonders.

"About five," I answer. "Up until I was seven."

Rose purses her lips for a while. "Why did you stop going?" She asks.

"Astoria convinced Dad that it wasn't a good idea to keep me going. That it was only insane children who went to speak to Healers," I answer.

Rose gives me an apologetic look. "Maybe she just didn't want you to feel out of place?" She suggests helpfully.

I shake my head. As if Astoria would have ever cared how I felt. "That wasn't it. _She_ didn't want to feel out of place among her elitist friends," I mutter. I'm not in the mood to talk about it anymore. I point to Rose's foot. "Tie your shoe, we're going to Floo."

Rose grins. "Hey, that rhymes." She bends down to tie the lace on her trainer.

"Mum! Dad! Rose and I are leaving," I call, unsure of where they are.

"Where are you going?" Scorpius asks, coming into the living room with a handful of licorice wands. His face is covered in Falcons face paint, and he has a grin on his face. It's obvious he enjoyed himself this morning. I'll let him tell me all about it later. Hugo trails in behind him, his hands full of sweets as well. There's no way Mum's at home.

"To Flourish and Blotts," I answer. "Where are Mum and Dad?"

"Dad's in the library doing work," Hugo answers. "Said he was too busy to pass the quaffle with us. And Mum's not home." I knew it.

Scorpius waves a licorice wand in Rose's direction. "Nice hair. I think it compliments the torn jeans nicely."

Rose narrows her eyes at Scorpius. "Oh, shove it," she retorts.

"I think it looks nice," Hugo adds helpfully. He's the sweet one. "Did you do it, Belle?"

"Yeah," I nod. "Really, Rose and I need to be going if we're ever going to get back."

"Get back from where? Where are you going?" Nina stomps into the living room, sticking her fists on her hips. "I want to come!" She isn't even dressed. She's got on another one of her blasted tutus and fairy wings. Oh, the imagination on that one.

"You don't even know where we're going," Rose sighs, exasperated.

"But I don't wanna be left at home with Scorpius and Hugo. They're _boys!_" Nina complains.

"I'm sure they'll let you fly brooms with them," I say, looking between my brothers. Scorpius looks at me as if I'm mad. No one's allowed to touch his broom but him, or there _will _be consequences..

"Mummy said I can't ride brooms by myself," Nina points out, crossing her arms. Really, she must she be so worried about what Mum said?

"Nina, you can fly on my broom with me," Hugo offers. "I'll go really fast if you want. And you know that since Mum's not home, we can have as much sweets as we want."

This seems to sell it for Nina. "Okay! Bye Belly, bye Rose!"

I thank my lucky stars that we weren't held up by Nina too long. "Are you ready to go?" I ask Rose. She nods. "Will one of you tell Dad we've left?" After Hugo nods, Rose in I are finally able to step into the fireplace and leave.

* * *

"We've been here an hour, Rose. There can't possibly be any more books that you haven't looked at," I groan. Admitted, I really do love Flourish and Blotts, but I can't say that I've ever spent an entire hour in the bookstore.

Rose throws me a dirty look. "I'm almost done, just calm down. Hey, can I get this one, too?" She questions, pulling a thick book off the shelf.

I shrug. "I don't care, as long as it gets us out of here sooner. My legs are going numb."

"No one told you to wear those shoes," Rose tells me. "I can't remember. Do I already have this one?"

"You've read it at least twenty times, I'm sure."

Rose takes another book off a shelf. "You should have a look at this one," she tells me with a smirk and a waggle of her eyebrows. I glance at the cover of the book. '_Ten signs he's going to propose'?_ "Scorpius, Al, and I think Holden's going to ask you soon. Just so you're sure."

I hand the book back to Rose. "I won't be needing this," I say hurriedly. I shot myself in the foot on that one.

Rose frowns. "No? Why not? Holden _is_ going to ask you to marry him. It's obvious," she presses.

"Well, maybe I don't _need_ to be married. What with all your stupid feminism, you should be proud of that." Rose gives me a strange look.

"I swear, it's like you and Holden got into a fight or something. Is that why you were acting all odd when you came home?"

I shake my head. I wish it was. That's a much better reason than having just kissed your sodding cousin. "No. Just leave it alone."

"It _is_, isn't it? What were you arguing about?" Rose asks.

"Nothing!" I hiss. "Just come off it!"

"Well, then. Someone's being a grumpy little troll this afternoon..." Rose mutters.

"Was that a short joke?" I demand.

"No. It was a 'my-older-sister's-got-an-attitude' joke," Rose informs me. "You see, Scorpius and I, we've got quite a few of them."

"I'm sure you do. Just hurry up, all right? I'd like to be back home before the sun goes down."

"You're so dramatic," Rose says, rolling her eyes. One day, they're going to get stuck that way. "I think I'm done. Fourteen books seems to be enough."

"You may read more than Mum does," I tell her.

Rose puts her free hand to her chest. "Isobelle, darling. You _do_ flatter me so," she says in a grand voice. Merlin, Rose sure is a character. _This_ is the Rose that I'm used to. Not the somber, quiet way she was acting when she first got home. It makes me feel better to see her happier.

"Come on, you. Let's go pay for these. What's your guess? Fifty galleons? Sixty?" I ask. Every time Rose and I go to buy books, we try to guess the amount. It's a little game we play.

"Seventy-five to eighty," Rose decides, setting the books on the counter.

"That much?" I question.

Rose nods. "Half of these are hard-cover," she reasons. I didn't even take that into account.

After we've- or _I've_, should I say- paid for all of Rose's books, we head for the door. All together, they amounted to seventy-eight galleons. Rose hit that nail on the head.

"Do you want some lunch?" I question as we exit Flourish and Blotts.

Rose nods. "Yeah, I'm starving. Leaky Cauldron?" I don't understand why, but Rose absolutely loves eating there. I'm not exactly sure what's so enticing about having meals at a pub, but if it makes Rose happy, I'm fine with it.

We walk down the street. It's a Saturday, so the Alley is quite busy. Rose and I hold a pretty meaningless conversation. Every so often, she mentions how excited she is to read one of the new books she got.

When we make it to the Leaky Cauldron, my stomach lurches, and I stop walking. "Belle, what are you looking at?" Rose asks, sounding confused. I look through the pub window again, just to be sure my eyes aren't playing any sort of trick on me.

"You said Mum was out today, right?" I question, just to double-check.

Rose nods. "She's out with Aunt Ginny," she confirms.

Well, Mum's certainly out, but she isn't with Aunt Ginny. I can see her clearly through the pub window. She's sitting with a man I certainly didn't expect to see, not for a long while anyway. I feel a bit sick, knowing what him being around could mean for us. I didn't know him too well, but I would recognize him anywhere. That red hair, those blue eyes. I see those eyes every time I look at Hugo. And _Nina. _

Mum's sitting with Ron.

* * *

***(A/N: I felt like you guys deserved a really actiony chapter! Like I said, I'm SO sorry I haven't updated in forever! Hope you guys liked the chap! PLEASE leave a review! **

***For the Americans out there (Like myself) when Rose and Belle are talking about 'football', they mean 'soccer', not NFL football :)**


	9. Your Values Are All Shot

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!***

****Title of this chapter comes from 'Broken Corwn' by Mumford and Sons. One of my favorites!**

_*******__**Leave a review **__**:)**_

* * *

Rose tilts her head and looks into the window of the Leaky Cauldron. Her eyes widen. "Belle, who is that man?" She asks me. "Why is he talking to Mum?"

I don't have an answer, and I don't want to stick around long enough to find one. "Come on, Rose. We can eat somewhere else," I say, putting my hand on her shoulder and trying to steer her away.

Rose's eyes widen. "He looks familiar..." she mutters.

"Rose, let's _go!_"

Rose turns to me so quickly, I fear that she might hurt her neck. "That's my dad!" she realizes. "Belle, that's my dad! I have to go and see him!"

"No, you _don't_. If Mum wanted that, she would have brought him home," I reason, trying to keep Rose at bay. "Don't go in there."

"Get off me!" Rose protests, prying my arm off her. "Of course, I'm going in there!"

"Rose Hermione Weasley, you'd better not!" I order, sounding too much like Mum for my liking.

Rose glares daggers at me. "You can't tell me what to do." She takes off toward the Leaky Cauldron and throws open the door, leaving me no choice but to follow her.

I make my way through the dark pub, apologizing to the people I bump into. When I get to Mum and Ron's table, the three of them are staring at each other, completely frozen. I'm sure Mum didn't expect to see us, and Ron didn't expect to see Rose.

"Hi..." Rose says uncomfortably, looking at Ron sheepishly. He gives her a slow smile.

"Rose," Ron says back, giving Mum a steely gaze. He doesn't even really look at her. Rose shifts her weight from foot to foot, looking uneasy. "Hermione didn't tell me you were going to be here." Ron gives Mum another accusatory glance. She looks away and turns to me instead.

"Isobelle, do me a favor and take Rose home." When Mum says my name, Ron gives me a look of hatred that could probably rival Astoria's. I know he believes I'm the reason his family was broken apart.

Rose crosses her arms. "What? Mum, no!" she protests, looking indignant. "I don't want to be taken anywhere!"

"Quit causing a scene," I mutter. Rose ignores me.

"Isobelle's right. Rose, please go on home. I'm sure your father's expected both of you to be back by now," Mum tells her. And I'm sure Dad also expected Mum to be out with Aunt Ginny like she said she was.

"Dad doesn't care whenever we get home," Rose argues. "He's busy working for the day."

Ron glares at Mum. "'_Dad_'?" he repeats, sounding a bit angry. "Is she talking about your _husband_, Hermione?"

Mum nods. "Who else, Ronald?" She replies in a biting tone. "Honestly, Rose. Now isn't the time. I'm sure you and Ron will have the opportunity to speak later."

"How long from now is later?" Rose questions, narrowing her eyes at Mum. "This isn't fair."

"Rose, many things aren't fair. Please, Isobelle, take your sister home," Mum requests exasperatedly.

I take Rose's hand. "Just come on," I say gently. "We'll talk about it at home. I'm sure this isn't a get-together you'd like to have in the Leaky Cauldron anyway."

Rose can't argue that point. She sighs and looks at Ron longingly.

"Just let me speak to your mother, Rose," he says flatly. Ron's face is virtually unreadable now. I can't decide how he feels toward Rose. At least when Astoria saw Scorpius again, she had an expression on her face. Ron seems rather apathetic.

"Okay," Rose concedes. I can tell it's only for the sake of her father.

"Let's go home." I squeeze Rose's hand, gently urging her to follow me. She hangs her head. I turn around and look at Mum for a long second, wondering why the hell she would do something so stupid. Honestly, meeting Ron in broad daylight? If we didn't see her, no doubt someone else would have.

I hold the door open for Rose. She turns and glares at me, not saying anything. "What?" I ask finally.

"He barely said anything to me," she complains, stuffing her hands in her pockets. "He was more interested in being angry with Mum."

I feel terrible for Rose, but I honestly can't relate to that. When I first met Mum, she seemed very interested in getting to know me better. Ron acted like he barely even noticed Rose.

"Just give it some time. I'm sure he didn't want to have a serious conversation with you while Mum or I was there," I reason.

Rose doesn't seem convinced. "I guess..." she mutters, kicking a pebble down the alley road. "What do you think he and Mum are talking about?"

I shrug. I really don't have an answer. I was wondering that myself. "Maybe, she just wanted to know if Ron was interested in seeing you and Hugo again," I suggest.

"He didn't _seem_ too interested."

"Like I said, he was probably just a bit shocked," I remind Rose.

"What if that's not it?"

"Then it isn't your fault either way," I tell her. "No matter what, will you promise me one thing?"

Rose looks at me. "What?" she questions.

"Don't tell Hugo about this."

"Why not? That's Hugo's dad, too," Rose points out.

I nod solemnly. "I know that. But, Hugo's different about Ron than you are. It doesn't seem to affect him. He doesn't really remember Ron that well, and having him involved is just going to confuse him," I explain. "Besides, Hugo's really close to Dad. I don't want him feeling conflicted." Sometimes, I feel as if Hugo is the closer to Dad than I am. He's so sweet and easygoing though, it's difficult not to get along with him. Hugo reminds me of the way Scorpius _used_ to be.

"Okay, I won't," Rose promises me. She seems upset. I don't blame her. "Can we just go home? I'm not hungry anymore."

I nod. "Of course, we can."

* * *

"Scor, I don't want you bothering Rose, okay? She's upset," I tell my younger brother. I pat the spot beside me on the stone stairs. We used to sit here a lot when we were younger.

"No kidding," he agrees. "She threatened to kick me in the bollocks."

I raise my eyebrows. "Did she do it?"

"No. Why's she so ticked off anyway?" Scorpius asks.

I'm silent for a while, debating whether or not I should tell Scorpius. Even though the little git's a Slytherin, he's still pretty trustworthy. "While we were out, Rose saw Ron- I mean, her dad- again today," I respond.

Scorpius turns to me. "Where?" He questions.

"Just out in Diagon Alley. She's upset because she didn't really get much time to speak to him," I say, answering Scorpius' second question before he can ask it. I don't mention anything about Mum being involved, deciding it would just confuse him more. I still don't even know what all that's about.

"That does suck," Scorpius agrees. "He should come by the Manor like my mum did."

It irritates me that Scorpius can so easily call Astoria his mother. Sure she gave birth to him, but Astoria was _never _a mother to him. "I take it you and Astoria are getting along well, then?" I ask before I can stop myself.

Scorpius nods. "Yes. She's really nice. She says she misses you quite a bit, actually," Scorpius tells me. I don't want to talk terribly about Astoria if Scorpius feels so great about her. I know it will only make him angry at me. "You should spend some time with her, too."

"I don't think that would be such a good idea."

"Why not?" Scorpius asks, frowning. "I know she isn't your mum, too, but you still knew her. She was your step-mum. Didn't you miss her even a little bit?" I shake my head. "Probably not, because your _actual_ mum came back," Scorpius mumbles.

"It's been what, a week, and suddenly Hermione isn't your mother anymore?" I question.

"I didn't say that!" Scorpius protests, averting his gaze. But he was thinking it.

"That's how you're acting, though. Look, whether you want to accept it or not, Hermione knows you better than Astoria does. _Hermione _raised you. Even when Dad was still married to Astoria, it was mum that was a lot kinder to you," I tell Scorpius. "You have to at least remember that much."

Scorpius looks like he doesn't want to believe me. He sweeps his blond hair out of his eyes. "Why did my mum leave?" He questions.

I don't know whether or not I should lie to Scorpius or tell him the truth. Lying never helped me, it only made me more upset. "Astoria and Dad argued a lot," I say vaguely.

"Over you? Did they fight over you?" Scorpius questions. I sigh. "What's wrong?" he asks.

"I suppose now you're too big for me to pull in my lap, and explain things to you, and let you know that everything will be alright. I miss that," I admit.

"What do you mean?" Scorpius asks, confused. "Explain what?"

"Anything..._everything..._ But I guess things are a lot easier to explain to a five-year-old," I answer. Looking at Scorpius. And then, I think about the way he treated me when he was younger, because he _couldn't_ understand everything. "Then again, maybe they aren't."

Scorpius opens his mouth to say something, then he closes it. "Why not?"

I look at Scorpius a long while. I haven't really noticed, but it's amazing how much he's grown. His personality has changed, too. He's no longer that vulnerable, innocent little boy he used to be. Now, he's a lot older, and much less naïve. He seems much more bitter as well.

"You blamed me," I mention finally. "You blamed me for Astoria leaving, for Dad being so angry at you sometimes, and for him arguing with our grandparents. You said all of it was my fault. You wanted me to go away," I tell him finally.

Scorpius purses his lips. "I'm sorry," he apologizes.

"You don't have to apologize. At that age, I would have been surprised if you _didn't_ blame me." Gone are the days when I felt like Scorpius trusted and loved me unconditionally. Even though he resented me a bit, it's a lot easier knowing someone blames you for something they can't understand. Now, if Scorpius were to blame me for the way things played out, it really would hurt me.

"Were those things really your fault?" He asks. "I mean, were they-"

"I understand what you mean," I say quietly. "Well, they had to do with me, yes, but I don't know if they were _my_ fault. Do you understand that?" I'd be surprised if he did. That was a pretty terrible explanation.

Scorpius nods slowly. "I think so... "

"It's all right if you don't," I assure Scorpius. I can tell he's still a bit confused.

"Good," Scorpius gives me a small smile. "Isobelle, when my mum left, why didn't she take me with her?"

The truthful part of me says, _because she doesn't love you. _I won't ever tell Scorpius that, though. I won't hurt him like that. "Dad didn't want us separated," I answer. "And you wanted to stay with me." Well, that isn't a total lie.

"Oh," Scorpius says quietly. "I wish Dad would have let Mum visit, though."

"What do you mean?" I ask, frowning involuntarily.

"I asked my mum why she never visited me after she went away. She said it was because Dad didn't let her. Why would he do that to me, Isobelle? I _missed_ her. And spending time with her today, it was really fun. Things could have always been like that." It wasn't Dad who kept Astoria from seeing Scorpius. It was the Ministry of Magic.

"Look at me, Scorpius," I say. "Dad didn't do that. Some things are out of _his_ control, even. If it was in his power, he wouldn't have wanted you to miss out on knowing Astoria. You do realize that, right?"

Scorpius nods quietly. "Why don't you like my mum?"

"I never said I disliked her."

Scorpius' piercing eyes meet mine. "I can just tell. You get always so defensive about her. Why?"

"It doesn't matter. How _I_ feel about Astoria's got nothing at all to do with you," I tell Scorpius.

"I just wanted to know..." Scorpius mutters.

"Why would you need to? If I were to tell you that I felt negatively toward Astoria, would it make _you_ feel any different?" Scorpius shakes his head. "Then it isn't important what I think, is it?"

Scorpius shakes his head. "No."

I kiss him on the top of of his head. "Go on, it's about time for dinner. Tell Hugo for me."

Scorpius stands up. "What about Rose?" He questions.

"I don't think she'll want to come out of her room. Speaking of which, this conversation is only between you and I, all right?"

"Okay."

"Scor?"

"Yeah?" Scorpius asks expectantly.

"I love you. Don't you forget that."

Scorpius gives me a small smile. "I won't. Aren't you coming for dinner?"

"In a second," I nod. "I suppose I should get Nina first, She's been in her room all afternoon and, quite frankly, I don't want the Manor to be burned down."

"Good thinking." Scorpius turns and heads downstairs. I get up and go down the hallway.

I brace myself before opening the door to Nina's room. She's turned around at her desk, her back facing me. A chemical-like smell fills my nose. "Nina, what are you doing?" I question hesitantly, stepping closer to her.

"Nothing..." Nina answers, still not facing me. I look over her shoulder to see Mum's owl, Giraffe, wrapped in one on Nina's necklaces. She's attempting to paint his claws crimson red, with one of my bottles of nail polish.

I sigh and put my hand over my eyes for a few seconds. "Nina, what are you doing to Giraffe?"

"Making him pretty," Nina answer nonchalantly.

"With _my_ nail polish?" Nina nods. "Did you ask to use it?"

"I asked myself to use it," Nina replies.

I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Well, you didn't ask _me._ And you can't use nail polish on an owl. Give me that back, please."

Nina crosses her arm and pouts. "Belly, you always ruin my fun," she complains. "_Always!"_

"Because your 'fun' always involves something that you aren't supposed to be doing," I point out, taking the bottle of nail polish from her. I disentangle Giraffe from Nina's necklace and clean him up with my wand. Giraffe flies off.

"Well, nobody will play with me. You're all too grown up," Nina tells me. Yes, it must be terribly boring for Nina. Hugo, Scorpius, and Rose are all very close in age, and have similar enough interests. Nina doesn't really have anyone her age to play with.

"That does seem like a problem, doesn't it?" I ask, trying to think of something. Nina nods. "What should we do about it?"

"Something fun," Nina decides.

"Like what?"

Nina's face lights up. "Finger painting!" she exclaims, her blue eyes shining. "Belly, we can finger paint lots of things!"

I decide that this isn't nearly as terrible as something I thought Nina would have come up with. "Sounds like a plan. Tomorrow afternoon, okay? We'll finger paint until our hands fall off. How about that?"

Nina grins and nods at me me. "Okay!"

"Then it's settled. It's time for dinner. Come on, you little stinker."

Nina gets up from her desk and skips out of her bedroom, grabbing my hand. I smile down at her. Looking at her pains me to think of what could possibly happen now that Mum and Ron have spoken again. I don't even know if he'll make the connection, though. Nina doesn't resemble him much, but she does act a lot like him and Hugo.

"Mummy! Me and Belly are finger painting tomorrow!" Nina announces, leading me into the dining room.

Mum gives Nina a forced smile. "Is that so? That certainly sounds like fun."

"Yeah, and it will be! And we had fun today! Hugo and Scorpius and I had a lot of sweets 'cause you weren't home!"

Scorpius rolls his eyes at Nina. "Shut it, you little twit!" he hisses. Nina sticks her tongue out at him.

"Scorpius! Don't speak to your sister like that! You wouldn't have anything to worry about if you weren't doing something you weren't supposed to be," Dad points out.

"Your father's right," Mum says. "Apologize."

Scorpius gives Mum a look, and I fear for a second that he's going to say something disrespectful to her. "I apologize, Nina," he says, not looking at her, but glaring at Mum instead. I sit down beside him at the table. When Scorpius catches my eye, he corrects himself.

"Where's Rose?" Hugo questions, looking around the table.

"She said she wasn't hungry," I answer. Mum tenses and purses her lips for a moment, but she doesn't say anything.

"Maybe she's getting sick?" Hugo suggests.

I shake my head. "No, I don't believe that's it."

"Oh, but it's her favorite tonight," Hugo realizes. "We should leave some for her, in case she gets hungry."

"That's a wonderful idea, Hugo," Mum tells him. "Isobelle, Rose didn't seem upset at all this afternoon, did she?"

It irritates me a bit that Mum's playing dumb about this, even though I'm the only one that knows the truth. I decide to give her the benefit of the doubt and play along.

"No, she was fine, actually. I wonder what's gotten into her. Scorpius, any ideas?"

Scorpius pushes his food around his plate with his fork, not looking at any of us. "Maybe she's just tired. _I_ am."

"Did you have a long day, today?" Mum questions, giving Scorpius a look of concern. "You know you woke up early this morning to spend time with Astoria." She says it in an accusing way almost, as if Scorpius was wrong for doing it.

Scorpius shakes his head. "That's not what I meant... just forget it, Mum."

"Dad, wanna pass the quaffle with us tomorrow?" Hugo asks, changing the subject.

"I'd like that Hugo, if only Scorpius would change that rotten attitude of his," Dad answers, raising his eyebrow at Scorpius.

This only seems to irritate Scorpius more. "I don't have an attitude," he snaps. I nudge Scorpius under the table.

"Your tone seems a bit sharper than normal," Mum points out, oblivious to the fact that Scorpius wants nothing more than to be rid of her right now.

"It is not. _Dad, _can I be excused?" Scorpius questions, turning away from Mum.

Dad shakes his head. "Not until you finish eating," he says.

"I'm done eating, then," Scorpius decides. "I just want to go to my room."

"You're grumpy today," Nina tells Scorpius. "Didn't you have fun with your mummy?"

Scorpius nods. I don't think his problem is that he had a bad time with Astoria. I know he had a great time. I'm just afraid that he's counting the days until he can go back.

* * *

I reach out and knock on the door of Holden's flat. I decided not to apparate or Floo, now wouldn't be the time to just pop up on him. Even though I planned on giving Holden more time to cool down, I couldn't help stopping by. After the ordeal with Teddy, I knew that I had to speak to Holden soon. The more I waited, the more I thought about what happened between Teddy and I. It just makes me feel even more guilty.

The door opens. When Holden looks at me, he frowns. He seems to be contemplating slamming the door in my face. That really hurts me.

"What do you want?" He demands, glaring at me.

"Can't I come in?" I ask quietly. Holden doesn't move for a while, then he finally opens the door a bit wider to let me in. "I'm so sorry," I apologize after Holden shuts the door.

"Are you, now?" Holden questions, as if he's waiting for the punchline of some stupid joke.

I nod. "Yes. I shouldn't have said what I said."

"Is that it?" Holden questions impatiently. When he gets angry, he completely tunes out anything I try to say. He also has a pretty unpredictable temper.

"Are you still upset with me?" I ask.

Holden looks like he wants to laugh. "No, I just got in an argument with my dad and kicked out of the house for God knows _how_ long. I'm not upset, though," he mutters sarcastically.

Instantly, I feel terrible. Holden must have gotten in a pretty horrific argument with his dad for him to kick him out. I remember how Dad and I used to argue about him being a Death Eater. I can imagine an argument like that would be a lot worse with two grown men.

"Oh, Holden, I didn't know-"

"What the hell did you think was going to happen, Isobelle? You can't just say something like that and expect it not to have any effect!" Holden says angrily, raising his voice. I want to point out that I wasn't the only one who said hurtful things, but Holden's so angry right now, I don't think it's worth it.

"I didn't mean to say it," I assure him quietly. "I never meant to hurt you."

"Well, you did."

"I love you," I tell Holden quietly. He really is making me feel terrible, and I just want him to know that it wasn't my intention to ruin things with his family.

"We're not doing that right now. Don't think you can just act like you're about to cry, and I'm going to forgive you! You don't understand what the hell you did, do you?" Holden asks, stepping closer to me.

I take a step backward. "I _do_ understand. And I'm not trying to make you pity me, that's the last thing I'd want from you," I assure Holden.

He crosses his arms. "I don't."

"You've changed," I notice, looking Holden in the eye. "You were kind, and thoughtful, and-"

"You _haven't_ changed," Holden cuts me off harshly.

"What?" I question, dumbfounded.

"You haven't! You're still as immature as you were when I met you! You don't understand anything, and nothing can ever be _your_ fault!" Holden shouts.

"What did I ever do to you to make you feel this way?" I ask. "I said _one_ thing, and suddenly, all of this is coming out?"

"You can't honestly believe that you've only done one thing to make me feel this way," Holden tells me. "You just can't."

"I don't... I don't get it," I say quietly, trying to follow.

Holden puts his hand to his chin. "Do you know how frustrating it is to come home from work after a long day, and then have something _else_ to deal with?" Holden questions.

My mouth gapes open in realization. "You're talking about me?_ I _make you feel that way?"

Holden nods slowly, as if I'm an idiot. "Do I have to spell everything out for you?" He asks acerbically.

"But, you could have told me. I just want to make you happy," I tell Holden. "If you had told me how you felt, I would have done something about it. You know that."

Holden narrows his eyes at me. "You won't even listen to your parents, and they want you to get some sodding _help._ Why would I think that you'd listen to me?"

"Because I would do _anything_ for you, Holden. You know how much I love you," I remind him.

"You don't love me enough to marry me," Holden points out skeptically.

I shake my head. "I love you _too_ much to marry you. I don't want you to feel trapped into a relationship with me. If you married me, you would feel stuck. I don't want that. I just want us to love each other forever because we want to, not because we feel like we _have_ to," I explain.

"As long as it makes sense to you," Holden mutters.

"It makes perfect sense. I mean, it really is terrible about your family, and I feel really guilty, but don't push me away, too," I plead.

"Belle, you know that's the last thing I want to do. You just make it so easy," Holden tells me.

"Holden, you've done things to anger me, but I've never wanted to _leave_ you," I tell him. "If you really loved me-"

"If I really loved you? If I really LOVED you?" Holden repeats, his voice loud enough to make me flinch. He grabs my arm so hard that wince. "Isobelle, I _do_ love you! That's why all the stupid shit you do irritates me so much! If I didn't love you, I wouldn't _care_ what you did! Has that ever occurred to you?"

I shake my head. "No, I just thought-"

"You thought w_hat?_ You don't give me any credit for anything I do, Isobelle! You don't know how much I really am there for you!" Holden shouts.

"I _do_ know, Holden! I never said you weren't!" I cry.

Holden ignores me. "If you think you can find someone who loves you better than I do, be my guest!" I've got no idea what's gotten into him. Of course, we've argued before, but Holden's never been so hurtful to me, and he's definitely never put his hands on me to hurt me.

"I can't. I know that no one else would love me more than you do," I assure Holden. I've known that for a while now. No one would ever love me as much as Holden does. But that isn't why I stay with him. I know that I'd never be able to love someone else as much as I love Holden. "I'm so sorry."

"Sometimes sorry isn't enough," he says, not looking me in the eye.

"Then what is? I wish I could take it back, but I can't. There isn't anything else I could possibly say, or anything else I could do," I tell Holden. "I feel as if you have unrealistic expectations of me."

Holden furrows his eyebrows and glares at me. "U_nrealistic_? How am I being unrealistic? I want you to be my _girlfriend_, not someone I have to look after! Why don't you understand that?"

"Am I really that much of a burden to you?" I question quietly.

Holden notices the fearful look on my face and loosens the grip on my arm. "Belle, I-"

"I've given you _everything_, Holden. Do you not remember all those years ago, on your birthday, what I told you? What you're saying, it's just _words!_ At least I _act_ like I love you!"

Holden lets me go and slams his fist on the wall. I suppress a frightened scream. "And how do you do _that_, Belle? By throwing yourself at me? By saying that you won't let me stop loving you? Or that you won't let me _leave_ you? You know, loving someone and being with them are two different things! What would you do if I loved you, but I wasn't _with_ you? Kill yourself? You said you can't _live_ without me!" Holden asks violently.

What a terrible choice of words. My chest feels like it's closing in on my lungs from all directions. Do I really seem that petty to him? Or that insane?

"How could you say that to me?" I demand, trying my hardest not to cry.

"Because, Isobelle, those are all of the things you've said to _me._ They sound mad, don't they?" In spite of myself, I nod. "You said you don't want me to feel trapped in a relationship with you, yet how _would_ you feel if you were in my situation? When you say that you won't let me leave you, that you'd do _anything_ to keep me, or that you can't manage without me, how am I _supposed _to feel? That isn't normal!" Holden informs me.

"I just wanted you to know how important you are to me," I say timidly.

Holden reaches out for me. He puts both his hands gently on either side of my face. I see a softness in his eyes that I haven't seen at all today, or the last time I saw him, either. "Belle, I know how important I am to you. Things just have to change, alright?" Holden kisses the top of my head.

I know this is his form of an apology, but I don't want to accept it so readily. Isn't that what Holden expects of me? He can speak to me this way because he knows I'm too afraid that he'll leave me to say anything about it. I hate it that Holden thinks of me that way, and I hate it that I've made it so.

Things _do_ need to change, from _both_ of us. I just wonder how they even got this way. I remember at one point, where I couldn't even _imagine _Holden doing anything to hurt me. It just saddens me to think that that was years ago.

* * *

_"What was it you wanted to show me, Belle?" _Holden follows me into my bedroom, and I shut the door after us.

_"Your birthday gift, of course,"_ I answer, smiling at Holden and squeezing his hand. His actual birthday was yesterday. Understandably, he spent it with his family. _"Sit here while I get it ready."_ I gesture to the bed. Holden sits down in the middle of my bed.

_"So, whatever it is, will I like it?"_ he questions, trying to make small-talk.

_"I'm hoping you will," _I answer. _"I really am."_

_"Any hints?" _Holden ventures.

I shake my head._ "Excuse me a moment. I've just got to... get it ready..."_

_"Oh, all right, then."_ I smile at Holden before I shut the bathroom door. I turn to look at myself in the mirror.

_"Calm down,"_ I tell myself. _"He loves you. He said it himself."_ Slowly, I step out of my dress. I'm satisfied enough with what I see. I unbraid my hair and brush it out, letting my curls frame my face. Normally, I'd never do something like this, but the situation calls for it. After I spray myself with a bit of perfume and run my fingers through my hair one last time, I open the bathroom the door. Holden's looking around my room, completely unaware that I'm standing before him in nothing but my undergarments.

I clear my throat. Holden's eyes widen. _"Er... Belle, w-what are you doing?"_ He chokes out. I don't say anything back. I open the cabinet above my mirror, taking out a bottle of Firewhiskey and two glasses. I fill them both halfway.

_"Giving you your birthday present,"_ I answer finally, moving to keel in front of him on the bed. I put a glass in Holden's hand_. "Don't you like it?"_

_"What is it, exactly?" _Holden questions, his face turning red_. "Firewhiskey?" _I don't understand what he's so embarrassed about. I'm the one who's half-naked.

I shake my head and take a deep breath_. "No. It's Me."_ Holden glances at the door. I put my hand on his cheek and gently turn him back to face me. _"My family isn't at home. It's just you and I,"_ I assure him.

_"Belle, what have you- what've you done with yourself?" _Holden asks hesitantly.

_"I took off my clothes, silly,"_ I answer, playing with his hair. _"You deserve something special. I just want to show you how much I love you. You'll let me do that, won't you?"_

Holden seems conflicted. _"Er..."_

_"Just drink. It'll help you relax a bit if you're nervous. It's fine, I do it all the time."_ I take a sip from my glass of Firewhiskey to demonstrate.

_"Where did you even get this from?"_ Holden questions, gesturing to his glass.

_"My dad's wine cellar. Now, honestly, I don't really want to talk about him right now. This is about you." _

I'm waiting for Holden to shake his head, to say no, to tell me to get away from him. Any of those things he normally does. _"I don't know about this..." _he admits.

I can't help but sigh. I suppose I'll have to explain this to him. _"Holden, you're seventeen. You're a man now. If I'm willing, you don't have anything to worry about. I think that, secretly, you've been considering this for a while." _I tell him, poking out my bottom lip. _"You can only deny me for so long before you stop meaning it..."_

When Holden doesn't say anything back, I know that I'm right. _"Belle, I-"_

I put my finger over Holden's lips. _"No,"_ I whisper, shaking my head. _"You've worried about me far too long. But, you see, the difference between you and I is that I can admit what I want."_

Holden opens his mouth to say something, but I cut him off. _"Look, tell me you don't love me, and I'll stop. But if you love me, you need to do something to let me know. What you say, it's just...words. Holden, I need you to show me. Show me why you won't ever leave me."_

Holden clenches his jaw. _"Belle, I'm not-"_

_"Tell me you don't love me, then,"_ I urge him. _"Go on. Say it!"_

_"I can't-"_

I tilt my head to the side. _"So, you love me?" _I ask.

Holden nods. _"Yes."_

_"Yes what?" _

Holden sighs and takes an extremely large gulp of Firewhiskey. _"Yes, I love you, Belle." _

I wrap my arms around Holden's neck. _"I love you, too. So much."_ I lean forward and kiss him. Surprisingly, Holden, puts his hand around my back, bringing me closer. I part my lips slightly, allowing him to kiss me better.

Holden looks at me- _really_ looks at me. It's the kind of look that you feel inside you, as if someone's staring into your soul. _"Are you sure about this?"_ He asks me.

I nod, leaning closer to Holden. Our chests are touching, and my knees are on either side of his legs. _"I've never been more sure about anything in my entire life."_ I bow my head and begin to place soft kisses on Holden's neck. _"I love you, Holden. I won't ever let you stop loving me. You know that, right?"_

Holden nods. _"Yeah."_

_"I mean it. I don't know how I could ever manage without you. You mean so much to me, I'd do anything for you. Do I mean that much to you?"_ I ask, looking into Holden's eyes. I couldn't imagine him not loving me. I don't know how I'd be able to survive if I knew Holden didn't love me.

_"Is that why you're doing this, then?"_ Holden asks, stroking my hair. I know he isn't rejecting the idea, because he's smiling at me. Or maybe it's just the Firewhiskey.

I nod. _"I just want to make you happy. That's all I ever want to do for you. I just want you to love me."_

_"I do love you, Belle,"_ Holden assures me. I know he means it. But maybe he only loves me for now. Sometimes, I feel like I love Holden a lot more than he loves me. I just want him to love me _forever. _

_"You won't ever leave me like Mum left me, will you?"_ I question, looking up at Holden with uncertainty. Even though Mum has been around for a good year now, the feeling never does leave. The fact that my own mother didn't even feel the need to be in my life makes it harder to believe that anyone else actually would.

Holden shakes his head, tracing his fingers up and down the curves of my hips. _"Of course not, Belle. And I certainly wouldn't be here with you right now if I was,"_ he promises me. I bite my bottom lip. _"What's wrong?"_

_"You just don't...seem happy," _I answer. _"Is it me? Am I doing something wrong? I'm sorry I'm not-"_

_"What? Belle, no it isn't you,"_ Holden promises me. _"You're beautiful, really you are. It's just, this is a pretty big thing, you know?"_

_"I know. I just want it to be special,"_ I tell Holden.

He nods in understanding. _"Of course, and it should be." _Holden trails his fingers slowly up my stomach, and I can feel butterflies. He crushes his lips against mine, kissing me more passionately than he ever has, more than I ever knew he had the ability to. I fold my fingers around the bottom of his shirt, pulling away gently for a second so I can tug it over his head. I toss it to the floor.

Holden lies me down on my bed kisses nearly every visible part of my body. I've never felt like this in my entire life_. "Belle...I...love...you..." _Holden tells me in between kisses.

I reach up and push Holden's hair off of his forehead, showing off those mesmerizing blue eyes of his. _"I love you, too." _A shiver runs down my spine as Holden kisses my collarbone, and goes further down. I drop my glass, and it shatters to the floor. I'll have it cleaned up later.

_"Holden..." _I gasp.

It takes him a second to meet my gaze. _"Hmm?"_ he mutters against my neck.

_"I don't want you to be afraid... of hurting me..." _I tell him quietly.

Holden's eyebrows furrow. _"I didn't even think about that,"_ he realizes, sounding a bit guilty.

I shake my head, silently telling him not to worry. _"I've been hurt before, and not out of love. It will be all right." _

* * *

**(A/N: Hope you liked the chapter and hope I didn't take too long to update! Leave a review, please! Thanks for reading!)**


	10. Give All My Secrets Away

***Harry Potter belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling!**

****I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season! Whatever you celebrate, I hope you enjoyed it! :)**

*****Title of this chapter comes from 'Secrets' by One Republic. Great song!**

***Leave a review! :)**

* * *

"Say, how is your younger brother faring?" Simon questions, actually looking at me for once. "Better, I'd assume?"

I roll my eyes and drop my stack of papers on his desk. "Why the hell is this so amusing to you?" I demand. "Do you enjoy angering me? Isn't it your job to put families together for _their_ better interest, not just your bigoted pro-pureblood ideals?"

Simon folds his hands and gives me a look as if this is all a joke to him. "Malfoy-"

"Either Isobelle, or Miss Malfoy. Don't disrespect me," I interject.

Simon smirks. "'Miss Malfoy', that has a bit of a ring to it. However, _Isobelle_, I believe I've explained to you before where I stand. I also believe that it isn't in your place to question me," Simon drawls, clenching his jaw.

Honestly, I'm past being Simon's intern. Nothing good's come of it, and he's just a loathsome prick. "You don't tell me what I may and may not do. I have the right to question you if you aren't doing your _job_ correctly. You can't decide who my brother's mother should be based on heritage!" I argue.

"Interestingly enough, I believe that's _exactly_ what I did," Simon counters. "Isobelle, you may honestly believe that I'm doing this for bigoted reasons, but I am not. I'm doing your family a favor by salvaging what little pride in the Malfoy name there is left. Singlehandedly, your father managed to tarnish that name. Do you want that to continue with your brother? Not only does he have a half-blooded sister and a mudb-"

"Watch it," I warn Simon, listening to him slightly.

Simon rolls his eyes. "Right, politically correct terminology. A _muggle-born _mother, could you imagine him having to say that he had no ties to his biological mother at all? You know first-hand how judgmental purebloods can be, and everything about your brother is considered scandalous in one way or another. The only thing that isn't taboo about him is his blood."

"Well, wouldn't that be enough?" I question, my voice clipped. "After all, if you've got 'pure blood', you're golden, aren't you?"

"Quite the contrary," Simon answers, shaking his head. "It isn't just about blood. It's about status as well. All that's tied in with the names, and I must say, the Malfoy name's really going down these days. At least let your brother grow up with an ounce of dignity. That can't happen with _your _mother."

I would be lying if I said I didn't understand what Simon was saying. I don't agree with it, but I understand him perfectly. Dad's decided to marry- and have children with- a 'mudblood', and people like Mum apparently are 'ignorant and uncivilized'. If Mum raises Scorpius, according to them, he'll become the same way. Scorpius will be subject to that for the rest of his life. I don't want that for him.

"Will it really be that way?" I question.

Simon nods. "Don't think I'm such an asshole now, do you?"

I suppose that in his own crooked way, Simon is trying to protect Scorpius. Being a pureblood himself, he understands Scorpius' plight far better than I do. But, where does this leave all my other siblings?

"I have three other siblings. Having Scorpius' mother back won't exactly be good for _them_," I point out.

"Well, no, but I'm sure they could make it in the world far better than your brother could. Now, before you become offended, think about it," Simon tells me. He's right. Hugo, Rose, and Nina don't have to appeal to anyone. They simply are who they are. They don't have a name to live up to, unlike Scorpius, who will be singled out terribly because he's a pureblood, and he's been raised the same as his half-blooded step-siblings.

"All right, but blood discounted, Scorpius' mother is a crazy bat. That can't be safe," I reason.

"Well, there's nothing I can do about that. You may just have to-"

"Deal with it?" I question, crossing my arms. "Is that what you were going to say?"

Simon narrows his eyes at me. "How about you let me finish my damn sentence?" He suggests harshly.

"Fine then, go ahead." I gesture my hand for Simon to continue.

"Look, I'm a lawyer, not a miracle worker. That's all I have to say. If need be, you can help out with your brother just fine," Simon reminds me.

"What do you mean 'if need be'? I'm not his mother, I am his _sister."_

"_Half_-sister," Simon interjects, as if that's important right now.

"I don't like this, Simon. It seems that Scorpius' social standing isn't worth risking Astoria," I say.

Simon looks at the papers on his desk, then at me. "Have you ever heard the muggle proverb 'keep your friends close, but your enemies closer'?" He questions.

I nod. "Of course, I've heard it. But I don't think it's meant to be taken literally."

"Why couldn't it be? Astoria's less likely to spring something on you if you can predict it," Simon explains.

"Only one problem, though. Astoria's brilliant at masking what she really is going to do," I remind Simon. Knowing Astoria himself, he should be well aware of that.

"Everyone has their tells," Simon informs me knowingly, watching me closely. "Any reason in particular you keep glancing at the clock? You aren't done until noon."

I bite my lip. "Well, I sort of have to be somewhere at half eleven," I tell Simon. That's only about ten minutes away.

Simon glares at me. Now, I know he's gone back to normal. "And were you just expecting to up and leave? When were you planning on letting me know?" He demands.

"Er... right about now, I suppose."

Simon sighs and rubs his chin. "How unprofessional of you," he mutters, rifling through all the letters on his desk. "Where is it that you need to be?"

"It's personal."

"_Personal?_ I don't think I like the sound of that," Simon says, smirking. We make uncomfortable eye contact.

"I don't mean it that way," I snap. "I'm sorry, but it really is rather important. If I have to, I suppose I can come back later on-"

"No need. I've got a case to attend the next hour anyway. You've just been doing my preparations for me," Simon tells me.

"Is it time for you to 'protect' someone else's family?" I question acerbically, all but using air-quotes. I glance at the clock again. "I've got to go."

When I walk past Simon's desk, his hand closes around my wrist. "What are you doing?" I question, giving him a hard look.

Simon stands up. "I'd just think you'd be a bit more appreciative, Miss Malfoy," he drawls. I'm stuck looking up at him, wondering what the hell is going on. "And you know, I don't do favors. I've told you that."

"According to you, you've done me two already," I point out.

Simon cranes his neck so that his lips are close to my ear. "It isn't a favor if I get something for it," he says in a low voice.

I raise my eyebrows. "What in Merlin's name are you talking about?"

Simon shakes his head. He moves his hold on my wrist to my hand. I pull away. "You'll know when the time comes. Just you remember, Miss Malfoy, no favor goes unreturned," Simon reminds me. On second thought, I really don't like it when he calls me 'Miss Malfoy'. He does it in such a way, I feel as if it's amusing him.

"Sure, I'll keep that in mind," I say sarcastically. "Now, I really do have to go. If you'll excuse me." I walk past Simon and open the door to his office. "Good afternoon."

* * *

"Hello, Miss Malfoy. How are you feeling today?" The Healer asks as I take a seat on the white sofa across from her. I haven't really wanted to go to the Healers', but Holden said I really needed to. I suppose it was him who finally made me realize that.

"Today? I feel fine, I suppose," I answer.

"No anxiety?" The Healer questions.

I shake my head. "Not today, no."

The Healer glances down at her clipboard briefly, then back up at me. "It seems you haven't seen us in over a month," she tells me.

"I haven't," I agree.

"Why is that?"

"I don't know particularly. Honestly, this entire idea doesn't appeal to me. I have more important problems than whatever this is."

"More important than yourself?" The Healer asks, raising her eyebrows. I nod. Why is it that people always seem to think that me putting others before myself is such a bad thing? Actually, it's pretty selfless. "So, why is it you're here today?"

"I had an appointment," I answer dumbly. The Healer gives me a look, and I realize that wasn't what she meant. I clear my throat. "My boyfriend thought it would be a good idea."

"And your parents?"

"Well, you know how they feel," I mutter. "Especially my mother." I don't think Dad really likes to acknowledge the fact that I'm supposed to go to the Healers, but he supports it all the same. Mum, on the other hand is adamant about it. She's the reason I'm here in the first place.

"Most importantly, how do _you_ feel about this? Your idea about it has seemed to have changed," the Healer notices.

"Of course, it has. When I was younger, this entire thing seemed appealing. But now, it's too much. I'd like to have my own life, without this," I explain. It would be liberating to not have to feel as if someone were responsible for me.

"Isobelle, you can't move on without any help. Has that worked for you yet?" I shake my head. "Especially not with your mother, am I right?" I nod. "How is your relationship with her now?"

"It's all right, I suppose. We argue a bit, though." Or Mum nags at me, more like.

"What about, may I ask?"

"Basically what I can and can't do, whether I drink or not, things like that. Like yesterday evening, she caught me taking down my tea with vodka and had a right fit," I answer. Mum doesn't understand the concept of stress-management. Or being over the age of seventeen.

The Healer's eyebrows raise again. "Do you believe she was wrong to become so upset?"

"I mean, it isn't as if she can control what I do," I reason.

"Well, after your splinching accident last year, I would assume your mother finds it necessary to be concerned for you," the Healer explains helpfully. Honestly, that entire incident was my parents' fault. Who in their right mind argues with someone who's been drinking? Of course, despite my terrible judgment, I wanted to leave. That little excursion left me in St. Mungo's for a few days. Splinching really is a nasty thing.

"Even so, she isn't making anything better. I understand her, but she's just adding more stress that I don't particularly need right now," I tell the Healer.

"And that seems like a perfect way to combat it?" She questions.

I shake my head. "Of course, not. But it's all I've got. Besides, my youngest sister knocked over my entire bottle of calming draught a couple weeks ago," I reply. "Actually, I believe it's time for me to have another."

The Healer purses her lips and shakes her head at me. "Miss Malfoy, you know that it would be imprudent of me to prescribe you any more potions."

I frown. "Why so?"

"They have to be taken in certain amounts, and_ by themselves_," the Healer answers, giving me a knowing look.

"What are you saying?" I demand, crossing my arms.

"Miss Malfoy-"

"Isn't it your job to _help_ me?" I feel myself growing frustrated. I don't even want to _be_ here, first of all. This sure as hell isn't making anything better.

"That doesn't necessarily mean prescribing you potions," the Healers informs me.

"What does it mean, then?" I question bitingly.

"I'm here to help you get some things off your chest that have been bothersome to you lately, and hopefully that will give you a better chance for the future." I've heard that bullshit line for years now.

"Well, I've got a lot to get off my chest," I huff.

"Such as?" The Healer prompts.

"Such as my boyfriend and I arguing constantly. Well, I suppose it isn't constant, but it's rather unpredictable. And my siblings' parents coming back into the picture. Both of those things aren't anywhere near good. I feel as if my brother and sister are beginning to blame me for why their parents weren't always there," I confess.

"Please continue, Miss Malfoy."

"Also, I don't want any of this to put strain on my parents' marriage, although I fear that it might. You see, normally, I tell my cousin about all these things, but we aren't exactly speaking at the moment."

The Healer leans forward in her chair. "Why is that?" She questions.

"I would rather not say."

"Well, it seems to me that you are placing much more stress on yourself than you really need to be. Do you not feel as if your parents are able to work out the problems in their marriage on their own?" The Healer questions, scrawling something on her clipboard.

I look around the room for a while, twisting my bracelet around my wrist. I don't really know what to say. I glance out the window for a long while, looking at the people walking on the street below. _All the people who aren't crazy._

"My parents hated each other. Er, I mean, they don't anymore, but they _used_ to. And when they argue, it's so terrible that I'm just not sure if they could handle anything more," I say, looking at the window still. How long will it be until I can go?

"I see, and do you feel as if your parents are more absorbed in arguing with one another than they are in raising your siblings?"

I turn to the Healer and shake my head vigorously. "No, of course not. I only said that my parents argue _sometimes. _It isn't often. And it's not like I'm forced to parent my siblings either, that isn't it. It's just that my parents don't really understand them as much as they think they do," I explain.

"It's great of you to do that, Miss Malfoy, but you cannot ignore yourself in the process," the Healer tells me. What in Merlin's name does that even mean?

* * *

I couldn't leave St. Mungo's fast enough. Afterward, I decided to take some time to myself, and just enjoy the fresh air. Of course, that didn't last long. I got distracted by a set of robes in the window of Twilfitt and Tatting's, and decided to have a look at them. After all, I'm sure this is what the Healer meant right? Do more for myself? If not, I'll have some new robes either way.

For nearly five minutes, I stand staring at the clothes rack, trying to decide which color will compliment me best. Oh hell, I'll just buy them all. If I don't like them, I'll let Rose have them, or Nina. She'd have to grow into them, though.

"Small world, isn't it?" A voice questions. My shoulders tense as I turn around. "Why, Isobelle, you don't seem too happy to see me," Astoria drawls, smirking.

"Have I ever been?" I retort, walking away from her. "Just because you want to play mummy to Scorpius now is no reason for you to speak to me." I turn my back to Astoria again. Why the hell can't she just leave me alone?

"Oh, I definitely have no intention of doing that," Astoria assures me.

I can't help but turn around. "You never cared about him then, and you don't now. What do you want?" I question, taking care not to raise my voice. There are only two other people in the shop, but I still don't want to draw attention to myself and Astoria.

Astoria puts her hand to her chest. "Isobelle, it really does amuse me how you think you're able to see through me so easily," she informs me. Honestly, I don't think I can see through Astoria at all. That's what scares me about her.

"I have no idea how Scorpius can even like you," I tell Astoria, staring her directly in the eye.

"That's because Scorpius isn't a hateful little child like you are," Astoria informs me, staring at me coldly. It's unbelievable to me that Astoria thinks she has the right to call _anyone_ else on this planet hateful.

"I'm not a child."

Astoria raises her blonde eyebrows at me. "Only children still live with their _parents,_" she says.

That comment bothers me more than I expect it to. I clench my fists slightly. "I wish I could tell Scorpius how terrible you truly are." I won't though, because Simon's words were meaningful. I also don't want Scorpius to be angry at me.

"Now why can't you?" Astoria questions, as if she doesn't actually know the answer. "Right, because Scorpius would _hate_ you, and blame you for ruining his life more than you already have. Because of you, Scorpius doesn't even have a proper mother."

"If you haven't cared to notice, Scorpius _does_ have a mother, and it isn't you," I counter.

Astoria looks as if she is actually about to laugh. "You can't be talking about that mudblood."

"Actually, I am. You know, she actually _loves_ Scorpius. And she didn't get her ass landed in Azkaban, so she could actually be there for _her_ children. But, it isn't like you were ever capable of raising a child in the first place," I tell Astoria, shrugging.

The look on her face says she could strangle me now, but there isn't anything she can do. Astoria steps closer to me. "You listen to me, and you listen well. Scorpius is _my_ son. I'm not going to let him be corrupted by your filthy-blooded whore of a mother. She's been around long enough!" Astoria whisper-yells. By now, we're alone in Twilfitt and Tattings. I don't know if I like that. I also don't like the way Astoria's speaking about Mum.

"You know something, Astoria? You can talk about how 'filthy' my mother's blood is or what have you, but at least she wasn't _forced_ to have her children. That's the thing: You treat your children a whole lot better when you actually _want_ to have them in the first place," I explain to Astoria.

"Your mother didn't want to have _you,_" Astoria points out, grinning as if she's pleased with herself.

"That may be, but she still wanted me a lot more than you ever wanted Scorpius," I remind Astoria. I step around her. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going home, to _my _family. It was a displeasure speaking to you, Astoria."

I don't give Astoria a chance to say anything before I walk out of Twilfitt and Tattings. _Without_ my robes.

* * *

After the day I've had, I just need to relax at home. Going to the Healers' didn't exactly help, not that I had high hopes for it anyway.

I walk upstairs to find Rose, Albus, Hugo, and Nina sitting cross-legged at the table in the 'games' room, playing a game of Exploding Snap. My siblings have friends over quite often.

"Hey, Al," I smile, greeting my little cousin. Granted, Al isn't he exactly related to me, but he's just as good as.

Al gives me a half-smile back. "Hi," he says back quietly. Al is the most soft-spoken out of all his siblings. With his messy mop of raven hair and bright green eyes, he looks exactly like a miniature Uncle Harry. Only, his glasses have rectangular frames instead of circular ones.

"Tell your family I said hello."

Al nods slightly. "I will."

Nina shrieks as a card explodes in her hand. "Ow!" she whines. "Hugo, I told you I didn't wanna play anymore!"

"Well, you can't just quit in the middle of the game," Hugo tells Nina, who's pouting and wincing. He has the largest deck of cards. He's winning. It's very difficult to beat Hugo at games, especially Exploding Snap.

"Yeah, we'll get you some ice after we're done," Rose assures her.

It took me a little while, but now I realize I don't see Scorpius sitting among them. That's a bit odd. "Where's Scorpius?" I question. "Didn't he invite Daisy over?"

Rose nods, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, they went up to his room a little while ago. Said we were boring them. They're probably snogging," she tells me disgustedly. Al nods in agreement.

"_Snogging_?" I repeat in disbelief. Since when does Scorpius think he can go around snogging people?

"Yeah. He and Daisy are girlfriend and boyfriend," Al tells me, quickly taking two cards from the table before they explode.

"Daisy's a tramp. She let a Fifth Year feel her up," Rose tells me. "Other than quidditch, all Scorpius can talk about is how fit she is."

I roll my eyes. This is too much. "Well, that's enough mind-numbing pre-adolescent bile for the day. I'll see the lot of you later. And Rose, don't forget about Nina's hand," I remind her, turning to leave the room. I walk down the hall until I'm standing outside of Scorpius' door. I've got no idea what's up the little bugger's bum, but since when does he think he can snog people?

I can't hear anything for at least a minute or so, so Daisy and Scorpius definitely aren't just talking to each other. Then, I hear Daisy's voice. "Speak to me in French, Scorpius. It's so cute when you do that."

Scorpius mutters something incomprehensible to me, and Daisy giggles, then says something back. I bet Dad wouldn't think those French lessons for Scorpius were such a good idea now. I can't help but open the door.

Scorpius and Daisy jump apart. Scorpius turns and glares at me. "Isobelle, get out of my room!" He shouts.

"I'm not _in_ your room. What were you and Daisy doing?" I question, crossing my arms.

"Isobelle," Daisy grins. The little cow. "Scorpius and I were just...talking." That's such a lie, considering I just saw them kissing, with my _own _eyes. They must think I'm stupid.

"Really? To me, it looked like you were _snogging_," I say.

Scorpius trains his cold eyes on me. "So what if we were? It's none of your business."

"Right," Daisy agrees, twirling her hair around her finger. "It really isn't. Scorpius and I can do what we want. That's why the door was shut." She combs her fingers through Scorpius' hair and gives me a steady gaze. I could rip her hair out.

"I remember when you were young and cute, both of you," I say. Now, they're demons. Especially Daisy."Scorpius, do Mum and Dad know about this?"

Scorpius nods. "Well, _my _mother does. She says Daisy's a nice girl," he informs me triumphantly. Well, of course sodding Astoria doesn't have an issue with this. Why would she? If anything, she'll let Scorpius do whatever he wants in hopes that it will create more drama between my parents.

"That's because I _am _a nice girl_,_" Daisy says, smiling at Scorpius. "Tell your sister to leave so we can be to ourselves. I have something else to tell you."

"You can't just barge into my room, Isobelle. Leave us alone!" Scorpius tells me, getting up to slam the door in my face.

Once the door is shut, I can hear Daisy's muffled voice say, "Scorpius, I really hate your sister."

I wait for Scorpius to come to my defense and say something, but he doesn't.

"I know," he mutters back. That hurts. I turn and stomp downstairs to Dad's study. He's always in there at this time of day.

"Dad?" I question, walking in. Mum's sitting in the chair in the corner of the room, reading a book with her feet propped up. She looks rather upset. "Oh, hello, Mum."

"Evening, Isobelle," Mum says back, turning a page of her book instead of looking up at me. What's her problem?

Dad sets his quill in his inkwell and looks up at me. "Do you need something?"

I nod. "I've just got a question for you."

"Well, what is it?"

"Do you think it's at all appropriate for Daisy and Scorpius to be snogging?" I question, feeling heated just thinking about it. I hate referring to a child badly, but Daisy really is a little bint. "I walked in on them."

Mum closes her book and looks up with interest. Dad gives me a confused look. "Isobelle, I'm afraid I don't know what you mean," he says.

"I _mean,_ Scorpius and Daisy are upstairs _snogging_ each other. Don't you have a problem with that?" I question, trying to get Dad to see the light.

"I, for one, do!" Mum agrees, turning to Dad. "Draco, you need to go speak to him!"

Dad sighs and runs his hand through his hair. These days, he's starting to look much older. I think it's all the stress he's been under lately. "I don't see what all the fuss is about."

"Scorpius is _twelve!"_ I remind Dad. "And Daisy's going to be _fourteen_ in a few months, there isn't anything wrong with that?"

"There most certainly is. Draco, they shouldn't even be_ by themselves,_" Mum says reasonably.

"Hermione, will you calm down for _one_ second? Isobelle, I trust at your age, you know better than to open a door without knocking first," Dad tells me, giving me an accusatory look.

How is he making this out to be _my_ fault? "That is _such_ a double-standard! If I recall correctly, you threatened _death _upon Holden for kissing me! And we were a lot older than twelve!" I argue, throwing my hands up out of frustration.

"You certainly aren't acting it," Dad tells me. "Besides, Scorpius is very responsible, and considering he and Daisy are most likely going to be married one day, it isn't a big deal at all." I feel terrible for Scorpius, pretty much already having his life decided for him. He can't really get out of it unless he runs away and gets disowned, or pulls the same stunt as Dad. I don't think that will work for two generations in a row.

Mum glares at Dad. "Well, this isn't 'one day', Draco, this is _to_day! I agree with Isobelle completely, that behavior is inappropriate and you shouldn't condone it! I don't know what's gotten into Scorpius lately."

Dad puts his face in his hands for a count of three. "Don't be so oblivious, Hermione. You know _exactly_ what his problem is."

Mum sets her book on the coffee table beside her. "I don't, actually. Please enlighten me, dear husband."

"Isobelle, would you give us a moment?" Dad requests.

I nod, stepping backward out of his study. I shut the door, and press my ear to it. The doors are rather thin at the Manor. Considering that sound-proofing and silencing charms exist, the doors don't really have to be too thick.

"Are you going to tell me now why Scorpius had been acting the way he has these past few days?" Mum questions.

"Isn't it obvious? I don't know what the hell Astoria's told him, and frankly, I don't care. I just want her gone. She's been poisoning his mind enough. I swear if I could, I'd march straight down to the Ministry myself!" Dad says angrily.

"Why can't you?" Mum asks.

"I can't simply keep Astoria away because I don't _like_ her, Hermione. Things don't work that way," he explains testily.

"I'm aware of that," Mum says shortly.

"It wasn't even _my _choice for her to show up again," Dad growls angrily. It's silent for a few long seconds.

"Excuse me, Draco for suggesting that Ronald actually see his children. Harry said it would be a good idea," Mum says defensively.

"You aren't married to Potter, Hermione! You're married to _me!_ I don't give a damn what Potter thinks!" Dad shouts.

"I don't understand why you're so hung up about it!" Mum argues back. "It isn't as if Astoria's still out of the picture!"

"Because, Hermione, you didn't even _ask_ me! And _I _don't have a child with Astoria that I didn't tell her about!" Dad points out. I'm glad I'm not the only one who remembers that.

"Nina is _yours_, Draco!" Mum says fiercely. "Ron doesn't even know she exists!"

"Biologically she _isn't_ mine! Ron could take you to court!" Dad reminds Mum.

"For what?" She demands. "For not telling him about Nina? I didn't have to tell him anything!"

"No, for passing her off as mine!" Dad answers. Now of course, I knew something like that was morally wrong, but I didn't know it was _illegal. _"It's _my _name that's on Nina's birth certificate! It's not Ron's name, it wasn't left blank, it's _my_ name, Hermione! That document says _I'm _Nina's father, which I'm not! We could _both_ be in legal trouble!"

"Draco, we talked this over for _months. _You knew what you were agreeing to," Mum reminds Dad, lowering her voice.

"What I didn't know, Hermione, was that there was a chance of Weasley coming back! Had I known that, I wouldn't have agreed to anything! I love Nina as if she _were _my own daughter, but Hermione, this really wasn't a good idea. I know it and you know it," Dad sighs.

"What wasn't a good idea?" Mum questions.

It takes Dad a while to respond. "We should have known this would happen sooner or later. How did we think we could raise five children with all different parents?" Both he and Mum have defeated tones now.

"Because we _love_ them, Draco. And we love _each other_. We're good parents. No matter what," Mum assures him. "But still, I'm sorry if you ever felt as if I forced Nina on you."

"I never felt that way," Dad tells Mum. "I never felt that way at all."

"I just want things to be all right," Mum says quietly. I know she's nervous for her own children, and she's nervous for Scorpius, too. He's up against a lot more than Rose, Hugo, or Nina.

"I know, Hermione. Hopefully, they will be," Dad says back. Well, my parents seem to be okay for now. I turn around to go back upstairs. I freeze, dead in my tracks.

Rose is standing right behind me, her eyes wide.

* * *

***Ah! Cliffhanger! Sorry about that! A lot happened in this chapter, sorry if it's so much to absorb, but I kind of wanted to bring together a few loose ends. **

**Hope you liked it! Thank you so much for reading! ****LEAVE A REVIEW :) **


	11. I Think I Might Totally Be Lost

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'The Girl' by City and Colour! It's Great!**

***So, I have something very important to ask. I don't know how many of you guys have read one of my other stories 'Can't Stop Loving You'. I really liked that story, and felt like it had the potential to be really strong. I feel like in the past year, I've become a much better writer, and I've considered rewriting it, and maybe changing it up a bit. Would any of you guys be interested in that? Thanks for your input!***

* * *

"Rose, I can explain," I say quickly. I don't know how the hell I'm going to explain this, but I suppose I'll have to try something.

Rose shakes her head at me in disbelief. "They're joking, right? Please say..." She trails off, knowing full well by the expression on my face that this isn't a joke.

"You can't tell _anyone_!" I tell her immediately. "If you tell- well, you heard what could happen!"

"Why the heck would they do something like that? My dad doesn't even _know_?" Rose demands, shaking her head again.

"No, and _you_ shouldn't know either," I point out. "You shouldn't be eavesdropping on Mum and Dad!"

Rose crosses her arms and glares at me. "Should you be?" she counters. "Besides, I came downstairs to get some ice for Nina like _you _said."

"Then you should be doing that. I don't know how you found your way over here," I tell Rose. I know she knows I'm frustrated with her, but I don't think she wants to back down either. She's too stubborn for her own good.

"Don't get mad at me! This isn't _my_ fault!" Rose argues indignantly.

"I'm not angry at you! Just go away!" I demand.

"Why do I have to leave? What are you going to do, stand here in front of the door like an idiot?" Rose questions, raising an eyebrow.

"It isn't up to you what I do. And how about we make a deal? If you leave, I leave," I offer. I just want to keep Rose from running into Dad's study. I've learned that simply telling her not to do so won't stop her.

"We leave at the same time," Rose decides. What the hell does the time we leave matter, as long as I'm after her? "Besides, I want an explanation."

"I don't owe you anything. Now get what you came down here for and take your narrow bum back upstairs."

Rose smirks at me. "Not until you promise to tell me more," she says. Merlin, Scorpius has rubbed off on her.

"I'm not telling you anything! Go upstairs!" I shout.

Suddenly, the door to the study opens and Mum steps out, closing it behind her. "Girls, what's all this yelling?" She questions, giving us both suspicious looks.

"Nothing," I lie. "Right, Rose?"

Rose opens her mouth to say something, then she notices the look on my face. "Right," she grumbles, giving Mum a dirty look. "Belle and I were just gonna go upstairs and talk about something."

Mum frowns at Rose slightly, then turns to me. "Isobelle, I thought you were already upstairs?"

"Me too," Rose agrees. "What are you doing down here?" I swear, I could kill her.

"I was in the library. I was about to go upstairs, and then I ran into Rose. Now we're _both_ going upstairs," I tell Mum, narrowing my eyes at my demon of a little sister.

"Oh, all right, then. I'm going to make dinner soon. Are Daisy and Albus staying?"

Rose nods. "Yeah." She grabs my arm. "Bye, Mum. Come on, Belle." Rose steers me up the stairs. I'm sure Mum is confused beyond words, probably wondering why the hell we're acting so strange.

Rose brings me to her bedroom and shuts the door. I do a quick sound-proofing charm. "Go ahead. Let it out," I tell her.

Rose crosses her arms. "Mum and Dad are both liars," She huffs angrily. "Especially Mum. How could she do that to my dad?"

"You don't understand, Rose," I tell her.

"Why the heck would I understand something like that? Were they just never going to tell Nina, or anyone?"

I shake my head. "No, they aren't going to say anything, and neither are you!"

"What if Nina _does_ find out? What if my dad finds out?" Rose questions. Obviously, neither of those things would be good. I've never worried about Ron finding out, but I know Nina would hate Mum and Dad if she ever learned the truth.

"Neither of those things are going to happen, okay? Just forget about it."

"How long have you known?" Rose asks. I don't understand what part of 'forget about it' she doesn't comprehend.

"I've known since before Nina was born. Now honestly, this conversation is over, all right? And I don't want you treating Nina any differently. Or Mum and Dad for that matter," I add. "Do you understand me?"

Rose nods. Her eyes are downcast. "Getting older sucks," she says, flopping down on her bed and sighing.

"What makes you say that?" I question.

"It's because when you get older, you start to realize that people aren't who you thought they were. Like Mum. When I was little, I thought she was like the nicest person ever. Now she's just a selfish liar," Rose explains.

"You don't mean that. You're just upset right now."

"I _do_ mean it! Mum is selfish! Look at what she did to you and Nina! Who could do that to their kids and not be eaten alive by guilt? And then she's always telling _us _how we should be kind and honest and all that junk and she's the worst out of anyone! It's not fair!" Rose groans.

I can't say she's wrong. That's _exactly_ how Mum is. But I never once thought she did any of those things to hurt us. "Rose, Mum is doing her best. You know that, don't you?"

Rose shakes her head. "Doesn't feel like it," she grumbles.

It's hard for me to try and say things to make Rose feel better. At one point, I felt exactly the same as she did. Sometimes, I still do. "Well, it's a little hard because our situation isn't normal. Mum and Dad just sort of have to play it by ear."

"That's reassuring," Rose scoffs. She's quiet for a while. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, anything."

"Do you think if it weren't for you, Mum and my dad wouldn't have got divorced?" Rose questions, giving me a serious look.

She makes it sound like it was all my fault. "Rose, from what I heard, your parents were already having problems with their marriage before I came about," I inform her.

"Well, it could have been a contributing factor. I would be mad too if the person I was married to cheated on me and had two kids, and didn't tell me either time," Rose adds. "And then brought one of them back into my house."

I frown slightly. I don't like how Rose thinks she can speak so freely with me about this. Whether she means to hurt me or not, she just shouldn't say it. "Rose, you're free to think anything about this that you want. But, I'd much rather you didn't tell me," I say.

"Why not?" Rose questions, completely oblivious.

I purse my lips for a long while, trying to think of a way to explain things to her. "I want you to step into my shoes for a moment, all right? Now think about everything you just said, and how I must feel hearing it."

"I'm sorry," Rose apologizes quietly. "I didn't think it bothered you."

"Would that not bother you?" I question, raising my eyebrows at Rose.

She nods. "Yeah, I guess it would. Really, I'm sorry. It must suck to be you."

"Thank you for that, Rose. That made me feel a lot better about myself." Rose can be so very tactless at times.

Rose's door opens and in walks Nina. She has a pout on her face as she notices me. "Belly, my hand really, really hurts. Rose never got me ice," Nina tells me, holding her hand out and giving Rose a pointed look.

"Yeah, well that's because-" I elbow Rose harshly and give her a look to shut her up.

"I was gonna say because I forgot! Geez," Rose complains. Something tells me I was right not to take any chances.

"All right, we'll go run some cold water over it," I tell Nina, getting up from Rose's bed. "Rose, you should probably go back to Hugo and Al."

"Yeah, in a minute." Rose agrees. She looks sort of upset. Nina offers me her good hand and I lead her down the hallway to her bathroom.

"Let's have a look, shall we?" I examine the small burns on Nina's fingertips and palm. Really, Exploding Snap isn't a children's game. "Looks like you got yourself good."

Nina nods. "It hurts, Belly!" she whines, poking her lower lip out.

"I know it does. Hold your hand over the sink, all right? This will make it feel a bit better." I turn on the faucet and let the water run over Nina's hand. She winces, but for the most part, she seems fine. "Does it hurt any less?"

"Yeah," Nina says quietly. "I'm never playing Exploding Snap again," she promises me.

"I think that's a wise idea. Now, go ahead and dry your hand. I'll put some burn paste on it for you later."

"Thanks, Belly." Nina rubs her hand on the pink flowered towel hanging on the rack. She turns to look at me. "Can I get ice cream?" she questions.

I shake my head. "Mum said she was going to make dinner soon. You don't want to spoil your dinner."

"But, I'm hungry," Nina whines, giving me that adorable puppy-face of hers. I can't resist it. It makes me melt every time.

"Fine," I sigh. "But this has to be our secret, okay?"

"Kay!" Nina says happily. "Wanna come with me, Belly?"

I suppose it couldn't hurt anything. Besides, Mum and Dad are always saying they want me to spend more time with Nina.

Minutes later, Nina and I are seated at the dining room table, and she has a bowl of strawberry ice cream in front of her.

"Belly, have you ever met a pink cow?" Nina questions.

I shake my head, frowning. "No, I haven't met any cows, let alone a pink one. Why?"

Nina shrugs. "I was just wondering. Because Hugo says they aren't real. I called him stupid for that," she informs me.

"Nina, that isn't nice," I chastise her. "Why were the two of you talking about pink cows?"

"Well, I told Hugo that if white milk came from white cows, and brown milk came from brown cows, then pink milk would come from pink cows. So would pink ice cream," Nina reasons, waving her spoon leisurely. That isn't at all true, but I don't have the heart to tell her so. Having had three siblings her age already, I know that if a six-year-old is set on thinking something, there's no changing their mind.

"Oh, I understand," I tell her. "But, I haven't met one yet."

"Maybe you will someday. Maybe I'll ask Daddy for Christmas. Daddy gets me what I want," Nina says nonchalantly. That _is_ true. Being the youngest, Dad spoils Nina to no end. It drives Mum up a wall.

"Thinking about Christmas already, are you? It's months away," I remind her.

"I know that. Belly, can I tell you a secret?" Nina questions, giving me a serious look. I don't know why, but that makes me feel nervous. I wonder if Nina's heard anything recently.

"Of course, you can."

"You're my favorite," Nina tells me. That makes me let out a sigh of relief.

"Well, thank you, Nina. Why's that?" I question.

"Because you talk to me like I'm a grown-up and stuff. And you're like a princess to me," Nina answers. That really makes me smile. Sure Nina and I don't always get along, but that's only because she's just six.

"That's very nice of you to say. But what about the rest of our brothers and sister? Don't you like them, too?"

Nina nods. "Yeah, I like them. Hugo's my other favorite. He's nice to me and plays with me a lot. But Rose doesn't like to play with me or talk to me, and Scorpius is mean to me," Nina says sadly. "You're my favorite sister. Am I your favorite sister?"

Most of the time, I don't really feel like Nina's sister. I feel like I'm her aunt or something. It's just that, with a fifteen year age-difference, it's easy to forget we're siblings, and it's quite hard to treat her like one.

"I don't have a favorite. I love all four of you the same," I tell Nina.

She looks a bit crestfallen. "No fair. That's what Mummy and Daddy say."

"Because it's the truth."

"Oh. But I only have a favorite because Rose and Scorpius are grumpy and mean all the time. Rose says I bother her and Scorpius says he wants to be at his mummy's house instead," Nina says. I knew Scorpius was just itching to be back with Astoria.

"Really? When did he say that?" I ask.

"He only said it two times today," Nina responds. "I don't get why Scorpius likes his new mummy more than Mummy. Mummy's really nice and she does nice things for us. Does Scorpius' mummy do nice stuff for him?"

_Hell no. _"I'm not really sure," I tell Nina.

"Oh, If I had a new mummy or daddy like Scorpius, I would tell them to go away. I love _my _Mummy and Daddy," Nina says nonchalantly, licking her spoon. I really hope that over the years, she can hold to that statement.

* * *

"Hey," I say to Teddy uncomfortably. I haven't spoken to him since the day he kissed me, and I really do think we need to discuss that.

"Hey," Teddy replies sheepishly.

I take a seat beside him on the sofa, and he looks away from me, suddenly taking an interest in his shoes. "I'm not mad at you, if that's what you think," I say finally. "I'm not upset, either."

"I am," Teddy replies quietly. "I was wrong for that."

I know Teddy was wrong for kissing me, but I was just as wrong for letting him. I don't know why I did. Maybe I was just so upset, I just wanted to feel as if someone else cared for me. "Why did you do it?" I ask.

Teddy shrugs. "I don't know, I just wasn't thinking, I guess."

"That's not what I meant. Were you just frustrated with your relationship with Victoire, or did you actually_ want_ to kiss me?" I ask. Those are two very different reasons, both with very different meanings.

"You're my cousin, Belle," Teddy reminds me, still looking away from me.

"Discount that for a moment. I'm saying that if we _weren't_ related, would you have still kissed me?" I ask.

"I don't really know," Teddy admits. "It just seemed like the right thing to do at the moment. I thought you-"

"You thought I what?" I ask, confused. "Did you think I _wanted _you to?" Honestly, I don't know what I wanted. That thought scares me. I shouldn't want Teddy to be near me in that way at all.

"It just upsets me to see you hurt all the time," Teddy admits finally. "You don't deserve that." His hair turns a deep blue color. I don't think he's even aware of it.

"Are you talking about Holden?" I ask. Teddy doesn't answer, and I take it as a yes. "Teddy, you know how Holden is, and you know he loves me. You don't have to worry about that." I think of the other day when Holden yelled at me, and it scared the living hell out of I know he only did it because he cares for me. Still, I can't imagine Teddy ever being that way with Victoire, and she can be just as infuriating.

"I know," Teddy says quietly. "I just want you to be happy."

"I am happy," I tell Teddy. I know he can tell by my voice that I'm lying, because he finally turns and looks at me. Teddy looks so guilty and upset that it makes me feel terrible inside.

"Are you really?" He questions.

"I'm happy with Holden. Teddy, we resolved our argument. He just thinks that he has to take care of me, and I need him too much. And I'm ungrateful to him sometimes. I guess I burden him more than I know. I'm glad he told me."

"Don't you hear yourself?" Teddy mutters, an edge to his voice.

"What do you mean?" I ask, furrowing my eyebrows.

"You let Holden say whatever he wants to you, and it doesn't bother you?"

I shake my head. "Not when he says things like that. I'd rather know than not know. If Holden didn't care about me, he wouldn't care how I behaved," I inform Teddy. Why does he take everything Holden says to heart?

"God, you're confused," Teddy mutters, shaking his head.

"What do you mean? I'm not confused! Holden is your best friend, you shouldn't be so hard on him."

Teddy stares at me for such a long while. "I'm not being hard on him. You just shouldn't let him make you feel so small. Belle, you're way more important than you know," he tells me.

I don't know what to say. I don't know why Teddy and Holden are so close, almost like brothers, yet Teddy feels the need to criticize the way Holden is to me. If I had a problem with it, I would have done something, wouldn't I?

"Why do you feel the need to protect me?" I ask. "It's always you. _Always._ Why?"

Teddy clasps his hands together. "Would you prefer it not be me?" He asks.

"I shake my head. "No, that's not what I was saying. It's just that, whenever I'm deeply upset, it's _you_ who knows how to make me feel more comfortable. I can tell _you _how I feel about things without you questioning me. I can cry in front of you for _hours_ and not feel embarrassed. Why is that person you and _not _Holden?" I question, putting my head in my hands out of frustration.

Teddy puts his arm around me. I want to say something, but I can't. Maybe that's what got Teddy and I into this in the first place. We're just too close to each other. We hug, and hold hands, and now we've _kissed_.

"I think that's something you need to ask Holden," Teddy tells me quietly. "Just tell him exactly how you feel. You need someone who's there for you, and won't judge you no matter what. Someone who loves you and _all _your flaws, and not just when they aren't interfering with what they've got going on."

I take a deep breath. "You know, now I think I know why everyone in our family marries each other," I say quietly. "It isn't just for the blood. Who better could understand you?" Now, of course, I don't feel _that_ way about Teddy, but it's understandable. I just hope that me being being able to understand doesn't make me any more susceptible.

"Just tell Holden how you feel," Teddy tells me again. "That's all you have to do." I only wish it were that easy. Whenever I'm about to admit my feelings to Holden, I feel like I just can't put them into words. I start crying, and I don't know why that is. Guilt, perhaps.

"Why did you kiss me, Teddy?" I question.

"I told you," Teddy says.

"Not really. You said you- never mind. It's not that important, is it? I suppose I'm just trying to rationalize in my head why I _let_ you kiss me- why I kissed you back. Am I really that pathetic?" I ask. Teddy pulled away when he realized what he was doing was wrong. I just sat there. Why didn't I do anything?

"God, no. Belle, I shouldn't have even put you in that position. I'm sorry," Teddy apologizes.

"I shouldn't have come to you. I shouldn't have stayed over. I should have just dealt with it myself. Because now, I'm more confused than ever."

"Why are you confused?" Teddy questioned.

I feel myself growing agitated, and I'm not really sure why. "Teddy, you know I've never kissed anyone other than Holden. _Anyone. _You know how Holden feels about me. And then _you _kissed me. How can I not be confused? You would lead me to believe that you feel the same as Holden," I tell Teddy. I know he doesn't feel that way about me. He can't. I just wish he would stop acting like it. For both our sakes.

* * *

**(A/N: I'm sorry this chap's short, but I have midterms all week, so I really wanted to get one up while I had the chance. Hope you guys like the chap! Leave a review! :)**

***So, I have something very important to ask. I don't know how many of you guys have read one of my other stories 'Can't Stop Loving You'. I really liked that story, and felt like it had the potential to be really strong. I feel like in the past year, I've become a much better writer, and I've considered rewriting it, and maybe changing it up a bit. Would any of you guys be interested in that? Thanks for your input!***


	12. Clarity Which Clouds My Mind

***Harry Potter belongs to Joanne Rowling!**

***Title comes from 'Thistle& Weeds' by Mumford and Sons!**

****So, I have decided that I **_**will**_** re-write 'Can't Stop loving you'. It's already in the works, so I'm very excited for that! Keep an eye out!**

***Thanks for reading! Leave a review! :)**

* * *

I sit up and look Teddy in the eye. "Why do you care about me so much?" I ask.

He gives me a blank look. "What do you mean?"

"I _mean_, why do you care so much how Holden treats me? Why do you care how I feel about him?" I ask. "It isn't any of your business."

Teddy furrows his eyebrows and frowns at me. "Belle, when you come to _my_ flat crying about something Holden's said to you, it _is_ my business," Teddy says firmly.

"I can handle myself!" I snap.

"No, you can't," Teddy says quietly. I know he doesn't mean to hurt me, but it still makes me angry. I glare at him."You needed to hear it."

"What do you mean 'I needed to hear it'?" I demand. "Teddy, you're mad at Holden for saying things like that, and then _you _say it? Look, you don't have to feel obligated to take care of me!"

"I don't!" Teddy cuts me off. "It's just a little frustrating to think that I respect you more than you respect _yourself_!"

"What is that supposed to mean? I respect myself plenty!" I tell Teddy. Who the hell is he to say whether or not I respect myself? He doesn't know the first thing.

"If you did, you wouldn't let everyone walk all over you! And you'd learn how to make opinions for yourself, not just do what everyone else wants you to!" Teddy argues.

"Is this _still_ about Holden?" I question. "Look Teddy, however he treats me has nothing to do with _you_!"

"Fine, but what's the point of being with someone who doesn't even realize how amazing you are?" Teddy asks me. Does he honestly think that I stayed with Holden for seven years without feeling as if he loved me? Teddy knows first-hand that Holden was never wrong to me. Until recently, we almost never argued. I miss that.

"What, because Holden and I argue I'm not supposed to love him anymore? Maybe you don't understand how important loving someone is, and that you don't just give up on them! You also don't go around kissing other girls when you don't even mean it!" I say fiercely, giving Teddy an accusing look.

"I meant it..." Teddy nearly whispers.

I stare at him, completely baffled. "What do you-?" Before I can even finish my question, Teddy's hands are on my face, his lips are on mine, and I'm pulling him closer to me. I don't love Teddy. Not like that. I don't feel any differently about him than I do for my siblings, or my parents. I _can't _feel any different. I can't love Teddy the same way that I love Holden. It wouldn't be fair.

Teddy tumbles on top of me, and I don't do anything to stop him. His lips are still crushed against mine, desperately and longingly at the same time. My fingers wind their way into Teddy's hair, bringing him nearer to me still. I can't think straight. It feels as if nowhere else exists other than the living room. I wish things were that way for a while. Then, all my problems would be gone.

Teddy starts placing light kisses on my neck. His fingers slide my robes off my shoulder. I put my hand over his. I don't why Teddy kisses me. Or why he says all these nice things to me that he thinks I need to hear. Better yet, I don't know why I kiss him back. When I think how Holden would feel knowing about this, Victoire even, it makes me feel guilty.

"You're beautiful," Teddy tells me, kissing me again.

"That must be hard to say, seeing as you're with Victoire," I reply quietly. Being part-Veela, Victoire is one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen. No matter what, I could never compare to that.

Teddy shakes his head. "It's not hard at all. You're way more natural than Victoire, _more_ beautiful," Teddy assures me, giving me another kiss.

"I am not." When Teddy says this, I feel like he's mocking me. How could he possibly hold _my_ looks higher than Victoire's? Even I don't.

"You just don't see it," Teddy tells me. "You don't see a lot of things that are great about you."

"And you do?" I question, wrinkling my eyebrows.

Teddy nods, brushing a stray curl out of my face. "I like to think so."

I'm silent for a long while, just thinking. Thinking about how only a couple weeks ago, I was sure that Teddy and I could never be together. I laughed at the idea of seeing Teddy as anything more than my cousin. How could I? Now, the joke just doesn't seem as funny.

"This could never work, you know," I whisper, Teddy's lips centimeters from mine.

He frowns. "What couldn't work?"

"You and me," I say. "What would everyone think? Mum would be appalled, Holden would hate us both, as would Victoire. Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny would have heart attacks. And Dad-"

"Would he really care?" Teddy questions, raising an eyebrow.

I shake my head. "Well, no. He likes you a lot more than he likes Holden. And besides, he's used to the idea. His entire family is."

Teddy traces random patterns on my collarbone with his finger. "This would be the first time your grandparents ever accepted anything you did," he realizes.

I purse my lips. That would be the truth. "Teddy, can I ask you something? And be honest."

He nods. "Yeah, anything."

"Do you think Holden loves me?" I ask. I know Holden loves me, and he says he does. I just want to know what Teddy thinks.

"Of course, I think Holden loves you. I never said he didn't. It's just, he doesn't always treat you the best," he answers.

"Oh." I nod quietly. I don't know what to say for a while. "Do _you_ love me?" I ask. Teddy looks away for a second, but he doesn't say a word. I don't know his answer.

* * *

When I come home, I hang my cloak by the door. I'm completely confused. I went over to Teddy's to confront him about what happened between him and I, and it only made things worse.

"Isobelle, is that you?" I can hear Mum ask. Really, who else would have come through the front door?

"Yes, it's me," I answer.

"Come into the kitchen, please."

"Why?" I ask. No answer. Of course, now I've got to go and find out. I walk into the kitchen. Mum is standing in front of the refrigerator with with her arms crossed.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm about to make lunch. I just can't decide what to cook," Mum answers. I don't understand why she cooks anyway.

"Just leave it to the house-elves. They always come up with something," I suggest.

Mum shakes her head. "No, they do too much around here as it is."

"You don't seem to mind it when they do the laundry," I point out. "Or clean the house."

"Isobelle, it would take me _days_ to clean this place on my own. And almost just as long to do laundry for seven people. Especially between you and your father," Mum tells me. "But cooking, I can do. There's no point in making the house-elves do more than they have to."

"That's the point of house-elves altogether," I mutter.

Mum ignores me. "I'm sure you could lend a hand around the house as well. Besides, what are you going to do when you move out?"

"Take my house-elf with me," I answer. It's obvious, isn't it? "She was a birthday present," I explain at the confused look on Mum's face.

Mum frowns. "What do you mean?"

"I mean Dad bought her for me on my birthday like any other present. What do you think happens? Scorpius has a house-elf too."

"I know that," Mum says. "But I always thought they were just your favorites or something like that. I didn't think they were really _yours."_ It's surprising how thick Mum can be sometimes.

"No, we _own _them," I say again. "As in _paid for_. They're ours."

Mum turns around to face me with a look of disapproval in her eyes. "That is _slavery_!" she says in a shrill voice. "My children will _not _be slave-owners!"

I cover my mouth with my hand to keep from smiling. "They aren't slaves, they're house-elves. Besides, we love them. What ever would we do without them?"

Mum closes the refrigerator door and huffs. "I still don't like it."

"I don't believe house-elves were the reason you wanted to come and talk to me?" I ask, sitting down at the counter. It isn't often that I'm in the kitchen. It still feels like I shouldn't be here.

"Of course, not. I wanted to ask you about Scorpius and Rose."

My heart starts beating faster. "What about them?" I question apprehensively.

"Do they seem different to you?" Mum questions.

"Well, of course they do. They're growing up, aren't they?" I answer.

Mum gives me a look. "Isobelle, you know that isn't what I mean. Behaviorally, do Rose and Scorpius seem any different to you?"

In spite of myself, I nod. "Yeah. They're... _quiter_," I say.

Mum nods, pursing her lips. "I'll say. Rose hasn't spoken to me in three days. And Scorpius, I have no idea what's gotten into him. I barely even see him, he's so shut up in his room. But he has no problem whatsoever talking to Draco."

I want to tell Mum that's because dad is and has always been Scorpius' father. It isn't that way with her. "You have Astoria to thank for that," is what I say instead.

Mum puts her hand to her forehead in distress. "Of course, I do. I really don't like the idea of her being involved with Scorpius again."

"No one does," I agree. "She's bad news all over."

"I couldn't possibly agree with you more."

Neither Mum nor I say anything for a long time. I fold my hands on the counter. "You know we have to talk about Ron," I say finally. "You can't act like that didn't happen."

Mum sighs. "I was waiting for you to confront me about that. What do you want to know?"

"After all these years, why are you even speaking to him? He's married, and you are, too."

"Isobelle, this isn't about Ron and I. Whether or not either of us are married, we still have children together," Mum reminds me.

"You can't force Ron to see his children," I tell her. "It's only going to make him resent you more."

Mum furrows her eyesbrows. "Resent me?"

"Resent you," I repeat. "You married his enemy, and you're letting him raise _his_ children. He doesn't want anything to do with that," I reason.

"Isobelle, Ron is still their father. I know that and so does he," Mum says.

"Knowing you have children doesn't necessarily mean you have to acknowledge them," I mutter, drumming my fingers on the table absentmindedly.

"Don't do that to me," Mum sighs. "I just, I don't know. I suppose I don't want Rose and Hugo wondering about their father the same way you wondered about me."

"You mean Rose. Hugo couldn't care less. He's completely satisfied with Dad. With everything, I mean. It's Rose you need to worry about."

Mum walks over to the oven and turns around so that I can't see her face. "I am worried about Rose. She's been so distant from me lately. Have you noticed that, too?"

"No," I say so quickly, it causes Mum to turn around to look at me. I couldn't possibly tell Mum all those things Rose said about her, or that she knows the truth about Nina. "What I mean is, Rose doesn't seem distant from _you_ in particular. She, er, seems that way with everyone."

"Do you think it's because of Ron? She really seemed to be upset that day."

I shrug. "Wouldn't anyone be? I mean, that was the first time she saw Ron in seven years, he barely spoke to her, and you told her to go home. It would be quite odd if she wasn't upset," I point out.

Mum nods solemly. "I know. I suppose that wasn't exactly the right thing to do. It's just that... I _am_ trying. You do know that, don't you, Isobelle?"

"Yes," I say quietly. Mum sits down beside me at the counter and hands me a cup of tea. "I know." Like Dad, Mum does seem incredibly stressed. It's sometimes hard to believe that they're barely more than forty years old.

Mum takes a sip of her tea quietly. "Isobelle, where were you this morning?" she asks matter-of-factly. I hate it how Mum always asks where I've been.

"I was at Teddy's," I answer stiffly, reminded of this morning. Just thinking about it gives me a headache.

"Oh, how is he doing?" Mum questions. "I haven't seen him in a week or so."

"He's doing great. Except he and Victoire are having some... _problems_," I venture slowly.

Mum seems interested in that. "Problems? But Victoire and Teddy always seemed to have such a great relationship."

I nod. "Yes, they did. But lately, Victoire and Teddy have started arguing a lot, and it really bothers Teddy," I tell Mum, watching her closely.

"Do they argue about anything in particular?" Mum asks.

"Not really. It's just that, well, Victoire hasn't really been treating Teddy the way she should. She just...walks all over him. He's too nice to her. He just wants her to be happy with him, and sometimes he has to forfeit his own happiness for that," I explain, messing with the teabag in my cup.

Mum doesn't seem to pick up on anything. "Is that what Teddy told you?"

"Yes."

"Well, what did Teddy say he was going to do about it?" Mum seems rather intrigued. Considering she knows them both on a personal level, and Victoire was her neice at one point, I guess Mum's got a right to be concerned with what happens between them.

"I told Teddy to tell Victoire how he feels about her, but he doesn't feel like he can do that. And then, there's this other girl."

Mum sets her teacup down. "What do you mean?" she asks carefully.

"They've known each other for a while now, from school or something like that. I don't know her. But she and Teddy are extremely close, and they've been...messing around just a bit."

"You don't mean-" Mum says, looking appalled.

"They haven't slept together," I say quickly, a bit too quickly.

Mum gives me a strange look. "That wasn't what I was going to say. I was going to ask you if Teddy's cheating on Victoire, but you've seemed to have answered that question."

I nod solemnly. "And this girl is cheating on her boyfriend, too. And Teddy knows this. He asked me what he should do, but I honestly don't know."

I wait for Mum to get angry and say that Teddy's wrong no matter what, but she doesn't say any of that. "Well, I would ask Teddy to discuss with this girl why they're so dissatisfied with their own relationships that they feel the need to cheat," Mum says. Teddy and I both know why we're dissatisfied, that isn't the problem.

"I don't think it's that, because Teddy says this girl always tell him that she is very happy with whomever she's with. But she knows Teddy cares about her, too. And sometimes, this girl feels like Teddy cares _more_ about her than who she's with. But it isn't acceptable for these two to be together because of... _reasons_," I say.

"What sort of reasons?" Mum questions, completely oblivious.

"Some people in their family wouldn't accept it. And the four people involved are very close, and they don't want to hurt anyone," I respond slowly.

"No matter what, someone _will_ get hurt," Mum tells me. "It's inevitable. No matter how difficult, if Teddy and this girl cared, they would break it off with whomever they're with. They shouldn't put them through that."

I know Mum's making sense, but things aren't as easy as she's making it out to be. "But what if Teddy and this girl aren't ready to end their relationships? What if Teddy and this girl don't really don't _know_ what they want?" I ask timidly, twisting my ring around my finger.

"Then they need to figure it out, and whatever's going on between them needs to stop until they do," Mum says firmly.

I finish the last of my tea and push the cup away from me. "All right, I'll tell him everything you said. Thank you, Mum." Well, that was semi-informative. I get up to walk out of the kitchen. I get my hand on the doorknob before Mum's voice stops me.

"Isobelle, are you cheating on Holden?" She questions. I can feel my heartbeat in my ears, and my spine goes rigid.

"No, why would you say that?" I question, shaking my head frantically. "I love Holden. Holden loves me, too. I would never do that to him. _Ever. _Why would you even say-"

"I wasn't born yesterday,_"_ Mum tells me. "I knew you were talking about yourself as soon as you began."

"I am _not_ cheating on Holden!" I say forcefully.

Mum sighs. "Isobelle, you can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to me. Why are you doing this?"

Because Teddy makes me feel as if my entire existence isn't a total mistake? Because he doens't make me feel as if I _owe_ him something? "Why do I do anything?" I retort.

"That isn't an answer. Isobelle, I don't want to ask you again," Mum tells me in a patronizing tone.

"I have needs, too!"

"What sort of needs do you have that involve you cheating on someone?" Mum asks me.

I cross my arms. Apparently, she doesn't get what I mean. "It may seem foreign to you, because you grew up feeling as if everyone important to you _loved _you! You never were a problem to everyone! But if you were, and you met someone who _didn't_ make you feel that way, you wouldn't forget that so easily!"

"Yet, I'm on my second marriage," Mum points out wistfully.

What the hell does that matter? "You are so consumed with trying to preach to everyone in this family that you can't step down for one minute and just be my mother!" I shout. "Forget about what's 'right' for one moment and just _listen_ to me! I'm not you! I don't make all the same choices as you! Why don't you understand that?"

Mum puts her face in her hands for a count of three. "Isobelle, I realize that we aren't the same person. I know that. I simply don't want you making the same mistakes as I made. You've made so many wrong choices," Mum explains. She acts as if I wake up every morning thinking of ways to deliberately hurt as many people as I possibly can.

"There isn't always a _right_ choice! Don't you think this is hard for me? I've never been with anyone _but_ Holden! Do you think I can just walk away from him without looking back? But at the same time, you would think he wouldn't want to give up seven years, either. You would think that he would try his hardest not to say hurtful thigs to me!" I tell Mum. "And I can't even _look_ at him without feeling guilty!"

Mum looks up at me. "Guilty about what?" I clench my jaw and look away from Mum. Tears sting at the backs of my eyes. I feel so childish, and so stupid.

"Holden told me that I was just something else to deal with once he came home from work. He says he doesn't feel as if I'm his _girlfriend_. He thinks of me as someone that he needs to look after. But yet, he still _loves_ me. How is that?"

"He said those things to you?" Mum questions disbelievingly. To her, Holden was always a perfect gentlemen, someone ideal for her daughter to be with. He was once that way to me, too.

"Yes," I confess.

Mum massages her temples. "He can't speak you that way. And you can't let him. First, it's things like that. Then the next thing you know, he's calling you a bad mother, and saying you're too invested in yourself to be with him, and that no matter what, no one else is going to love you," she says. It sounds more like Mum is speaking to herself than to me. I can't imagine Dad saying something like that to Mum. He could never. It may be Wizarding War Three when they argue, but Dad loves Mum instensely.

"Dad said that to you?" I ask, hoping it's not true.

Mum glances at me and shakes her head. "Of course, not. I'm not talking about your father. I'm talking about Ronald," she answers quietly.

"Oh," I mutter. I suppose that's better than Dad.

"I don't know how you feel, do I?" Mum questions sarcastically. "I don't know what it feels like to have the first person you ever loved be so hurtful toward you, and look at you like they don't even _know_ you anymore. The worst part is, they don't even tell you whether or not it was your fault."

"I didn't know..."

Mum swallows hard."Isobelle, divorcing Ron was the second hardest thing I have _ever _had to do."

Mum stares at her wedding ring for a long while then stands up. I have no idea what she means by that. She brushes past me and walks out of the kitchen, leaving me all by myself. I smell food burning in the oven.

* * *

**(A/N: I know the little kids weren't technically in this chapter, but I felt as if it was sort of time to get toward the root of Belle's feelings. I haven't really done that much since TbaM, and seeing as this story has a pretty huge gap, it felt necessary. Also, I feel as if Hemrione can be a confusing character at times, with unclear motivations. In my head, she's just so complex because so much goes on in her head that she never has one concrete reason for doingwhat she does. That being said, hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Leave a review!**


	13. The Opposite of Love's Indifference

***Joanne Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

****Title of this chapter comes from 'Stubborn Love' by the Lumineers. Please listen to that song, it's like the THEME of this chap! It was just perfect :)**

*****Thanks for reading, leave a ****review**** :)**

* * *

The next morning, I walk into the dining room and stop. What the hell are my grandparents doing here? Why didn't my parents tell me they were coming?

"Isobelle," Grandmother smiles "So glad you could join us."

I turn to Dad and frown. "You didn't say-" Dad gives me a look and I immediately know not to ask about it.

I sit down beside Scorpius. Why is Mum at the table? "Where are Hugo, Nina, and Rose?" I ask.

"Upstairs," Mum answers quietly. "They've eaten already." I don't think it's fair that they have to be excluded whenever my grandparents visit. Still, I'm sure it's much better that way. Less arguments.

"Well, why are you here?" I ask my grandparents. Dad frowns, but he doesn't say anything. I don't care if I'm being rude.

"Just paying a visit," Grandfather answers stiffly. My grandparents never just 'pay visits'. I've always believed that Grandfather and Dad looked alike, but never so much so as older Dad gets, the more he resembles Grandfather. I don't exactly like that.

Grandfather turns to Scorpius. "How are things with your mother?" He questions.

Scorpius smiles. "Great," he answers. "She's really cool." Dad cuts a scathing glance at his father. Mum's eyes are downcast. She must feel out of place, and I'm sure that's how my grandparents like it.

Grandmother smirks. "Oh, dear me. We don't mean to make you feel uncomfortable, Hermione." They're all too predictable by now.

"I don't feel uncomfortable at all, Narcissa," Mum replies rigidly. "Why would I?"

"I can name quite a few reasons," Grandfather says under his breath.

"Father," Dad growls.

Grandfather ignores him. "Draco, have you spoken to Astoria at all lately?" He questions with fake interest.

Dad shakes his head. "I take great care _not_ to speak to her. Why?" he asks cautiously. Mum looks up as well. Scorpius peers between our grandparents cautiously, as if he knows what is about to happen. That little git's always up to something.

"Oh, Draco. Regardless, Astoria is still the mother of your son. That is a special bond that the two of you will _always_ share. You really should communicate more," Grandmother tells Dad with false pity. As terrible as my grandparents are, Grandmother has always been the kinder- if even by a bit- and more sensible one. Sometimes, I wonder if she hadn't married Grandfather, if she hadn't turned into the woman that she is, would we have been able to get along better. I will never know.

"What reason would I have for that?" Dad questions. I can tell that he's growing more and more frustrated with his parents by the second.

"If you did, you would know that Astoria propositioned quite a lovely idea to your son the other day," Grandfather answers, taking a sip from his glass.

Dad sets his jaw hard. "Pray tell, Father."

"Astoria believes that it would be in Scorpius' best interest if he were to come and spend a bit of time with her. I agree," Grandfather tells us.

"No," Mum and I say in unison. There's no way on earth that is _ever_ happening.

"I've already allowed Scorpius to spend _hours _with her unattended. I believe that's more than I should have done in the first place!" Dad answers, growing heated.

"Dad!" Scorpius protests.

"Scorpius, stay out of this!" Dad raises his voice and Scorpius keeps quiet, but he doesn't seem happy about it. Dad turns his attention back to his parents. "Why isn't Astoria telling me this her damned self? I suspect the two of you are behind this. Would you really take _her_ side instead of mine?"

"Draco," Mum says, putting her hand on Dad's arm to calm him down. My grandparents seem nearly repulsed by this action.

"Draco, this is not about taking sides. This about what is best for Scorpius, and he should know his mother," Grandmother reasons.

"_Hermione_ is Scorpius' mother!" Dad says angrily. I can tell he's losing his temper quickly.

Scorpius rises angrily to his feet. "No, she isn't! She is _not_ my mother! And she won't _ever _be!" Scorpius shouts, giving Dad a hateful look. Mum gasps and her forks falls out of her hand. Grandmother and Grandfather look as smug as ever. Before I can form another thought, I'm grabbing Scorpius by the arm and snatching him out of the dining room. I push the door closed.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I demand, my eyes boring into Scorpius' grey ones.

"Nothing! Let me go!" He complains, trying to writhe away from my grip.

"_Not_ until you tell me why you're behaving like a such a selfish brat! Where do you believe you get off, saying something like that in front of Mum? The woman who has _raised_ you for more than half your life? And _she_ isn't your mother?" I ask.

Scorpius shakes his head. "No, she isn't. You know it and I do too!"

"Believe what you want, but Hermione taught you a lot better than Astoria ever did. She taught you some actual _manners_. Now you're just as inconsiderate and rude as your mother ever was."

Scorpius gives me a violent glare. "Don't talk about my mother!"

"And you don't talk about _mine!_" I counter. "Why are you being so stubborn?"

"Because you ruined my life!" Scorpius yells finally. "If you were never born, Dad and my mum would still be together! All of this wouldn't be happening! It's all your fault, and I _hate _you for it!"

There are so many things I wish I could do to Scorpius right now. Kill him, rip his head off, all of those would have been acceptable. But instead, I'm stuck staring blankly at him. The first sibling I ever knew- the _only_ one I had for most of my life- and someone who was the sweetest little boy ever. My own _brother_. And he's just told me that hates me. I can barely fathom that.

I let Scorpius go. "You definitely are your mother's son," I say quietly, my hands shaking. "Ungrateful and disrespectful."

Scorpius actually looks quite proud to hear this. I want to know what Astoria's been saying to him all this time to turn him against us. What's next? Is he going to start calling Mum a mudblood, and me a half-breed? I'm not sure that I would be surprised.

* * *

Breakfast with my grandparents didn't get any better. Hopefully, Scorpius got into some sort of trouble, but I honestly doubt it. Really, what could have been done? You can't punish someone for being ignorant. And at this point, anything we try to say to Scorpius isn't getting through. He won't listen. I hate to say, but he's just going to have to find out the truth for himself.

Someone knocks on my door. "Come in," I say unenthusiastically. Surprisingly, it's Dad. I haven't spoken to him a lot lately. We've both had other things to deal with.

"Isobelle," Dad says uncomfortably. I don't really think he knows what to say. Recently, things have been tense between Dad and I. It seems the older I get, the more complicated our relationship becomes.

"Yes?" I ask, looking up. I see a look of defeat in Dad's eyes. It's accompanied by a look of constant weariness.

"I heard what Scorpius said to you. He was quite loud," Dad explains at my confused expression.

"I was bound to hear it sooner or later," I say under my breath. If I know that, why doesn't it hurt any less? But, I guess sticking your hand in the flame you know is hot still burns you.

"It _isn't_ your fault," Dad assures me. "I just want you to know."

"I do know that. But what does that change? Scorpius thinks it, and Rose believes it as well."

Dad sighs and rubs his chin, taking a seat in the chair opposite my bed. "Hearing Scorpius say that he hated you reminded me of the night when you told me you hated me," he tells me.

I nearly forgot about that until now. Thinking back on it, I now realize how Dad must have felt then. Probably worse even, being my father. "I'm sorry," I apologize.

Dad shakes his head. "Don't be. I always was so terrible to you. I still am," he admits.

I don't know where that came from. "You aren't," I say quickly. "You were a great father. You _are_ a great father." Of course, Dad was never the best father, but I knew he loved me. And I knew he was there. But it was a lot more obvious before he married Astoria.

It seems like Dad can't bring himself to believe me. "I spent most of your life concerned with the wrong things- Astoria, Hermione, Pansy, my parents, my _job._ Not _you._ Not a day goes by that I don't regret that," Dad says guiltily.

I'm wondering why I'm hearing all this for the first time now. What made Dad finally snap? Was it the fact that he's beginning to see so much of himself in Scorpius? "You didn't know how Astoria was going to be," I reason. Even I know that isn't a good enough excuse. Still, I felt the need to say something.

"That's no excuse," Dad tells me. "I constantly put people in your life who belittled you. A father shouldn't do that."

I raise my eyebrows and look at Dad. "You didn't really _know _any people who didn't," I point out.

"I suppose you're right," Dad agrees. "I understand why you are the way you are."

"What do you mean?"

Dad takes a deep breath. "Believe it or not, I know exactly what it's like to see horrible things," he says sarcastically. Of course he knows. For part of his life, his family was devoted to serving the darkest wizard of all time. "But, I _don't_ know what it's like to have your own family be just as horrible. I couldn't imagine."

It's very awkward to be having this conversation with Dad. He isn't exactly the talking-to type.

"Oh," I say. "I just wish you would have told me all of this before."

Dad glances up at me, confused. "What do you mean?"

"Dad, I'm an adult now. Why is this the first time I'm hearing this? Maybe if I had known you'd felt bad before, or that you understood me... I just needed to know," I say. Part of me is angry that Dad waited so long to tell me. I could have really used the encouragement.

"I don't know," Dad admits. "I suppose I didn't realize that until now. Isobelle, thank you for at least trying to talk some sense into Scorpius."

"Yes well, he's being foolish. Someone should let him know," I reason. To no avail, I might add. "How did Mum take it?" I think the person who was offended the most today was Mum.

"She's definitely hurt by it," Dad answers. He seems just as hurt thinking about it.

"How couldn't she be? You know how she feels about Scorpius," I remind Dad. Upon meeting him, Mum treated Scorpius as her own son, and loved him just as much as she did Rose and Hugo. And this is how Scorpius repays her? It's like a slap in the face.

"I most certainly do. That's why I fell in love with her in the first place. And why I fell _out_ of love with Astoria," Dad adds. Both Mum and Dad made it very clear that they wanted the other to accept their children. Dad had problems with Astoria because, aside from all her other terrible qualities, she couldn't bear the thought of raising me as her own child.

"Dad? May I ask you something?" I say. I feel like a child, asking permission to ask a question.

"Sure, anything."

"How did you know you wanted me?" I ask. That question has been pressing at me most of my life. A long time ago, I saw the memory when Mum gave me over to Dad, but I've never known why he kept me.

Dad gives me a confused look. "Because you were my daughter," he answers plainly, as if that's all the reason he needs.

"That didnt stop Mum from handing me off," I point out.

"Isobelle, Hermione had her reasons..." Dad reminds me.

"But you didn't know that then. For all you knew, Mum just didn't want a child. And you knew what having a child with Mum- while you weren't _married_, let's not forget- meant. Why did you want to do that to yourself?"

Dad sighs and looks down for a moment. "I wanted to give you a chance, I suppose. You'll understand more when _you_ become a parent. When you look into the face of your child, you can't... you can't help but want the best for them," Dad explains. "You swear in that moment that you are going to give them the world, no matter what. That's how I felt with you."

I know that Dad doesn't feel this way, but in his defense, he was never a bad parent. Certain things, and people, just got in his way. Up until the time I was six or seven, I had the perfect childhood. Growing up, there wasn't a thing Dad didn't give me, love and attention included. He was the same way with Scorpius. And Nina.

"That's exactly how I feel with Scorpius, and Nina, Rose, and Hugo. With everyone that I love, actually. I understand exactly what you mean," I tell Dad. It's always hurtful to see the people that you love go through tough times. It's even more hurtful when you know that you had something to do with it.

Dad and I are both quiet for a while. I don't know what to say. I look at the ground for a little while. "Is something wrong?" Dad questions.

I shrug. "I'm just thinking about something," I answer.

"About what?"

"How do you think Holden treats me?" I don't know why I would ask Dad, because I know he doesn't like Holden. But maybe, since we aren't arguing for once, he'll be honest with me. From what Mum said yesterday, I think she thinks Holden and I should be done. But, I still love him.

Dad clasps his hands together. "Where is this coming from?" He asks.

"It's just a question. How do you think?"

"I think he treats you fine, Isobelle, from what I've seen. But, things obviously aren't going smoothly if you have to question it," Dad reasons.

"I don't know," I admit. "I think I need to talk to him about it." I don't know what Dad will say about this, but at the end of the day, I don't need his consent. I have to do what's right for me.

Dad frowns slightly, but he doesn't protest. "That may be necessary," he agrees. Finally, we're making progress.

* * *

"Holden, we need to talk," I say seriously. Immediately, the smile is wiped from his face.

"Talk? About what?" He asks.

I purse my lips. "I think you know."

Holden wrinkles his dark eyebrows. "I think I _don't,_" he challenges.

I take a deep breath and try to remind myself to remain composed. I'm here to talk, not initiate an argument. I'll let it happen on its own.

"We need to talk about _us_," I inform Holden, waiting to see his response. Holden looks confused. I'm not sure why, because he knows just as well as I do that things aren't how they used to be.

"What do we need to talk about?" he asks.

What exactly do I want to say? I take a moment to think about it. "Holden, I love you, but you have to understand that you can't speak to me the way you do sometimes. It's disrespectful." I said what I wanted, but I think the wording would have been better suited for a child.

Holden frowns. "What are you talking about?" He asks.

I wish he wouldn't play dumb. "You know what I'm talking about. Whenever we discuss something, and my opinion isn't the same as yours, you make it out as if my opinion is stupid," I explain. "Or you berate me for it."

"Name one time I've done that," Holden prompts.

"Fine," I say. That's simple. "When I told you I didn't want to marry you, you blew things out of proportion and accused me of not loving you. And, other than that, you just say hurtful things to me."

"Like what?" Holden asks. I can tell he's growing increasingly frustrated with me. I don't know why we can't just have an open discussion about this. He's doing the same thing he always does: shutting me out and asking one-sided questions to the point where I feel as if I'm talking to myself.

"You call me clingy, frustrating, something else to deal with, and you've said more than that. That isn't how you speak to the woman you love," I tell Holden.

His blue eyes flash with irritation. "Oh, is that so? Well, if you loved me, you wouldn't make me _feel_ that way," he counters.

I have to take a second to calm myself. "You act as if I behave that way on purpose. Honestly, Holden, you act as if everything is my fault and you don't need to put any effort into this relationship. You act as if you don't have to try anymore, like I'm always going the be here."

Holden makes an amused sound. "You are," he says under his breath. Have I really made it seem to him that no matter what, I won't leave him? Or his Holden just that arrogant?

"No, I _won't_ be," I correct him. "Not if we can't have a discussion like proper adults. Or if you can't see the point of giving me the same respect that I give you. I can be with someone who _doesn't _make me feel small." It wasn't until now that I understood what Teddy meant. Holden thinks that because he _has_ me, and he doesn't have to do anything to _keep_ me.

"Oh, and who will that be?" Holden's making this sound like a complete joke, and it's making me angry.

"It won't be you," I assure him. He isn't even _looking_ at me. "Holden William McKinnon, you listen to me! I'm being _serious!_"

Holden shrugs nonchalantly. "I never said you weren't."

"You're acting like this is a joke! I'm your girlfriend, and I am _tired_ of you acting like I'm everything but!" I tell Holden.

That seems to get through to him. He he clenches his jaw. "And I'm _tired_ of you acting like you forgot _how_ to be my girlfriend! Honestly, Belle, I would like to make it one day without hearing you complaining about something! _Nothing_ anyone does is good enough for you!" Holden shouts.

"That is a _lie_! Don't drag everyone else into this because of _your_ inadequacies!" I retort. "Merlin forgive me for speaking to you and thinking you're listening! I'm glad you let me know how selfish you are, at least now I can stop wasting my breath!"

Holden finally stands up from the sofa. His passive expression is gone. "And I'm glad you let _me _know how dramatic and nagging you are! At least now I can quit wasting my _time!_"

That makes me laugh mirthlessly. "Oh, this is just a waste of time? I'm glad our seven years together really meant something to you! I hope you got something out of it, because I sure as hell did!"

"Yeah," Holden nods. "Somebody who was finally willing to put up with all your bullshit!"

"I hope you aren't talking about yourself, because you've made it quite clear that you can't _stand_ putting up with all of my 'bullshit'!" I scream. This just confirms my suspicions. Holden definitely _isn't_ the same same person I met seven years ago. He isn't anywhere close.

"It gets old after a while," Holden informs me. "How many damn issues can one person have?"

"A lot! And a lot more if they're stuck in a dead-end relationship with someone like you!" I retort.

Holden clenches his fists, and looks as if he wants to say something. Instead, he takes a deep breath. "We need to take a break. I need time away from... all _this_," he says finally, gesturing his hands out to me.

I can't even help it, my mouth drops open. "What does that mean?" I ask, utterly bewildered.

Holden runs his fingers through his hair and sighs. "It means that I can't do this anymore. Not right now, I can't."

"Fine," I say. "If you don't want to resolve this, then I have nothing more to say to you." Even though I'm infuriated with Holden right now, and I know Teddy treats me better, I still feel bad for Holden. What am I going to do? Be upset for a day or two and then go to Teddy? While Holden has to deal with this by himself? Or will he talk to Teddy as well? After all, they _are_ best friends. It's a bit selfish of me to think that I'm the only one who can speak to Teddy.

I don't even know what the hell 'taking a break' even means. Are Holden and I done? Are we still together? I wish he would have specified. Whatever it, I hope it's the wake-up call Holden needs. I'm going to make _certain_ that I won't always be at his disposal.

* * *

**(A/N: Sorry for the super-angsty chapter! But yeah,sorry for bratty Scorpius, but I think it was in the cards sooner or later. I really wanted to put a nice, NORMAL Isobelle/ Draco moment, since we don't get a ton of those. And Super-Duper sorry for the Belle/Holden argument :( It kind of made me sad, but I think Isobelle needs to learn that she can be her own person, without Holden sometimes, because she was kind of his puppy. Hope you liked the chap! Leave a review :)**


	14. A Year Better Spent in Love

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

****Title of the chapter comes from 'Babel' by Mumford& Sons!**

_****Leave a review :)**_

* * *

"Yeah, and so I told her that if she wanted to come and watch sometime, I'd take her whenever she wanted," Dominique tells me, stretching her feet out on the sofa.

Rose smiles. "See, Dom, this is why you're my favorite cousin," she tells her. "Tied with Al."

Dom jokingly puffs out her chest. "Thank you, thank you. I do try," she answers.

"Well, you have to see what Mum says about it first," I remind Rose.

She rolls her eyes. "I don't _care_ what Mum says. If I want to go watch Dom play football, I will." It frustrates me that Rose and Scorpius see no point in respecting their parents anymore.

I try to silently communicate with Dom through a look. I think she understands me. "Nah, that would be kidnapping if I just took you. You've got to see what Aunt Hermione says," Dom tells Rose, winking at me over her head. I give her a look of gratitude.

"Fine, all right," Rose huffs. "But you know she's going to say no."

"Why would she?" I ask. I like to think that Mum's pretty lenient, within reason.

"I'll take this one. Aunt Hermione, for reasons unbeknownst to me, thinks I'm 'irresponsible'," Dom answers. "I'm sure whe wouldn't trust me with her dear, beloved daughter all alone in the muggle world." I can't exactly blame Mum. I love Dominique, really I do, but she's very scatterbrained. However, I'm sure Rose can take care of herself for the most part.

"Oh," I say. "Well, you never know until you try."

"I _do _know, because Mum doesn't change," Rose says under her breath, crossing her arms. "She's so boring."

"Better than my mum," Dom says helpfully.

Rose nods. "True."

"Rose, that's rude!" I chide.

Dom waves her hand. "It's all right. We all know my mum's a blonde-haired demon," Dom reasons.

"_Dominique!_" A voice shrieks.

Dom sinks back in the sofa and rolls her eyes. "Speaking of blonde-haired demons..."

Victoire comes through the hallway and stomps into the living room, crossing her arms and glaring at her younger sister. I haven't seen Victoire in a few weeks and, given everything, I really haven't hoped to.

"Why are you in my flat?" Dom demands. "I thought I changed the wards..." This makes Rose laugh. Victoire narrows her eyes at her.

"Well, you obviously didn't do it well enough. Mum and Dad sent me. You knew we were all supposed to have lunch with them today!" Victoire tells Dom, giving her an annoyed look.

"I told Mum I wasn't coming! I don't know why she sent you to come and change my mind, because you aren't," Dom says simply. I don't exactly blame Dominique. Between Victoire, Louis, and Aunt Fleur, her family really is overbearing. Uncle Bill is the only one I get along with reasonably.

Victoire groans. "My God, Dominique, do you _always_ have to behave so incorrigibly?" she questions.

Dom shrugs. "I don't know, do you always have to behave like you've got a stick shoved up your arse?" she counters. Rose smirks, but I give her a look and she stops. If I can hide my laughter, so can she.

Victoire ignores her. "Something's likely to have died in here!" she complains, looking around. Dominique has clothes strewn across the floor, along with shoes, papers, and other various items. It's complete chaos. But chaos is the perfect word to describe Dom.

"Yeah, my mood! Thanks for killing it!" Dominique retorts. "Now seriously, why don't you go back to Mum and Dad's and tell them that I'm _not_ coming! So you can get out of my flat, and Louis can enjoy himself with whoever the hell his girlfriend is this week-"

"Oh, so _that's_ what this is about?" Victoire demands, her face going red. "You don't want to go because you're still single? Well, maybe if you weren't so lazy and acted like a girl for once, someone would like you, too!" Something tells me that this has nothing to do with Dominique's relationship status, she just dislikes her family.

I'm not entirely sure that Rose and I should be here, watching them argue. Neither Victoire nor Dominique seem to care, though. They'll argue anywhere and in front of anyone.

"I wouldn't be so quick to call someone single! Teddy won't even speak to you! He's finally realized what an annoying bint you are!" Dominique shouts, giving Victoire a triumphant look.

Victoire's face goes slack for a moment. "You know it isn't just me, you idiot! Teddy's been under a lot of stress lately because of his... because of..." Victoire stammers, trying to think of something to say.

Dom tilts her head to the side and raises her eyebrows at her older sister. "Really? 'Cause Belle told me she was Teddy's flat just the other day," she informs Victoire.

Victoire trains her eyes on me. "_What?" _She questions, sticking her hands on her hips. Rose looks at me curiously as well. I didn't want things to happen this way.

"I just went to... speak to him. I had to ask him something about Holden," I say uncomfortably, under Victoire's blue-eyed gaze. That isn't a total lie. How was I supposed to know that Victoire and Teddy weren't speaking? He never told me.

"Why couldn't you ask Holden yourself?" Victoire asks, setting her jaw hard.

Oh, that's a good question. "Because..."

"Because it's none of your business, that's why," Dominique answers for me. "Now, really, you should just go back to Mum and Dad's. You're probably late."

Victoire groans and stomps away, and I can hear her disapparate a second later.

"God, I hate her," Dom tells Rose and I.

"You don't _hate_ her," I correct Dom, thinking of when Scorpius told me he hated me. I don't want Dom to be the same way with Victoire. "You just don't like her so much."

"She actually _hates_ her," Rose informs me. "No offense, Belle, but I'd hate you too if you were like Victoire." According to Scorpius, it doesn't take that much.

* * *

"Teddy, where are you?" I call. It's probably wrong, but I have to talk to Teddy about having not spoken to Victoire. Maybe Holden and I are arguing, but I never cut off talking to him completely without letting him know _why._

"In my room."

I take off my cloak and set it on the sofa, then head down the hallway. "What did you tell Victoire?" I ask, coming into Teddy's bedroom. He's turned away from me, looking out the window. "She said the two of you haven't been speaking."

Teddy rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "I didn't tell her anything. I haven't spoken to her," he reminds me, restating my words.

"Teddy, you can't do that. If I had to speak to Holden, then you have to speak to Victoire," I tell him. "It's only fair."

"Since when are things 'fair'?" Teddy mutters. He picks up one of the photographs on his bedside table. He shows it to me. "Do you remember this? It was when we were younger, before things got complicated-"

"Things were always complicated," I correct Teddy, laughing in spite of myself. "I think you mean _less_ complicated?"

Teddy nods. "Yeah, that's what I meant," he says. "So, did you talk to Holden? You said earlier..."

"I did speak to him," I tell Teddy shortly.

"And?"

I have to take a second to compose myself. Since it happened yesterday, I haven't really thought about the conversation between Holden and I. Now that I look back on it, I can't help but get emotional. "It didn't go well," I whisper, taking a seat on Teddy's bed and bowing my head.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I nod. Talking would be nice. "We-we got into this huge argument, and it ended with Holden yelling at me and saying he 'couldn't do it' anymore, and that he needed a _break_," I whisper, feeling a tear slide down my cheek.

Teddy sits down beside me and he takes my hand in his. "I'm sorry," he apologizes sincerely.

"I just never thought that he could be so hurtful," I sob. "What does this even mean? Is he- is he done with me?"

Teddy shrugs and shakes his head. "I don't know, Belle. I really don't know..." he admits.

I glance up at Teddy through my tear-rimmed eyes. He actually seems pretty beat up that I'm upset. Maybe it's selfish of me, but I like it that Teddy's upset, too. It shows that he cares about my feelings, unlike Holden. "This is all my fault," I say quietly.

"How?" Teddy asks.

"I've been trying to hold on to a relationship that I _know_ isn't working," I tell Teddy. I mean, I just haven't, I don't know..."

"What don't you know?"

I take a deep breath. "You know I've never been with anyone else," I say.

"Yeah, I know that."

"And I guess I just feel like I _have _to stay with Holden. We don't really have a reason to separate," I explain.

Teddy wrinkles his eyebrows. "What do you mean you don't have a reason? You know not all relationships last forever. You know that."

I sigh and wipe my eyes a bit. "I _do_ know that. But Dad and Astoria separated because Astoria was mental for Merlin's sakes. And Ron, he- he couldn't accept the fact that Mum had another child. Holden and I don't have something nearly important as that-"

"Him making you cry isn't important?" Teddy asks, squeezing my hand. "If anything, the fact that you guys don't have anything crazy like that happening, and he's still nasty to you makes it even worse." I suppose I never thought of things that way.

"Teddy, why is it that so many people have to go through more than one relationship before they meet someone who treats them correctly?"

Teddy shrugs. "Well, sometimes you have to have some wrong in your life to know what's right," he answers.

I purse my lips in thought. "Is this right?" I ask. The fact that Teddy and I are both cheating on someone isn't right, but say that we weren't. Then should I still feel guilty about having a happiness that I deserve?

"I need to _know_... for myself. I need to know whether or not we're being stupid, or if this actually means something," I continue slowly.

Teddy's shoulders straighten. "What do you mean?" he asks cautiously.

"I don't want to say it. That will make it sound even more mad." I move closer to Teddy and gently place my hand on his cheek. "I felt a bit bad for Victoire this morning. But the more I think about it, the less she deserves you," I whisper.

"Doesn't feel so great, does it?" Teddy leans forward, nearly closing the distance between us. His lips are so close to mine, there's only a breath between us. I pause for a second, and gaze into Teddy's eyes. He doesn't talk about his feelings a lot, but I can see by his eyes alone that he's as hurt and confused as I am.

Teddy glances down at my neck, at the silver pendant resting on my chest. The one he and Holden gave me for my birthday. He reaches around my neck and unclasps it, setting it carefully on the bedside table. I understand why he took it off. That necklace is a symbol of both Teddy _and_ Holden. It wouldn't be right for me to wear it at a time like this.

I look at Teddy again. There isn't anything holding us back except for each other. I close my eyes as Teddy kisses me. This time, it feels slightly different. There's something about being Teddy's room, in _his_ bed, and on a 'break' from Holden that makes this feel less... _immoral_.

I try not to think of Holden as Teddy's lips find their way down my bare neck. But I can't. It isn't just that easy. That's the disadvantage of only having ever been with Holden. Even when I'm with someone else, I can only think of being with Holden.

Tentatively, I pull Teddy's shirt over his head and let it fall to the ground. He stops and looks at me. "Are you sure about this?"

"Y-yes," I answer, my breath hitching. I feel Teddy's fingertips trace lightly over my stomach and around to my back. I'm glad Rose convinced me to wear a dress today. Next thing I know, my dress is coming off my shoulders and pooling around my waist. Teddy gently pulls it down my legs.

"Teddy, I have to know. Do you love me, yes or no?" I ask timidly.

"I thought it was obvious," Teddy responds, looking down for a moment.

"Did you ever tell Victoire you would marry her?"

Teddy shakes his head. "No."

"Well, did you ever promise her-"

"Vic and I never really talked about those things. We kind of just took life as it came at us," Teddy explains, doing his best to quell my fears. I couldn't be responsible for the destruction of a potential marriage.

I sigh. "Holden and I should have done that." Teddy puts his hand under my chin and leans forward to give me a kiss. I pull back."Are you going to break up with Victoire?" I ask.

Teddy seems surprised at my question. "I... I don't know," he answers. "I've been thinking about it."

"I just wanted to know there was a possibility," I admit. "You can kiss me now."

Teddy grins at me. "Thanks for the permission." I put my hands around Teddy's shoulders and he kisses me over and over. It isn't seconds until I feel Teddy's cold navy bed sheets beneath me.

"It is possible to love two people at once, isn't it?" I ask suddenly. "Like you can love me a_nd_ Victoire, and I can love you _and_ Holden? Or is that wrong?"

Teddy nods. "Sure, it's possible. Just not at a moment like this," he informs me. I can tell Teddy's a bit amused at how little I actually know about relationships, but he won't say it out loud.

"You- you won't compare me to Victoire, will you?" I ask nervously.

Teddy shakes his head. "I wouldn't even think of it. And as long as you don't compare me to Holden," he answers. Teddy really is so nice to me.

"I won't," I promise him.

"Okay then, I won't either."

* * *

I can certainly say that things went well between Teddy and I. I realized that maybe if I have to think about whether or not being with Holden is worth it, then it isn't. If Holden and I had the relationship that we should, then I wouldn't have to question it.

When I come home, I hear loud shouting and things slamming. I immediately know Dad is involved. Some things just don't change. "Dad?" I ask, going up the stairs. No one answers. "_Dad?_"

"She isn't! You can't make me think anything!" That's definitely Scorpius.

"I know that I can't!" Dad shouts back.

"You love Isobelle more than you love me! You only care about _her_!"

"That isn't true! If I didn't care about you, I wouldn't care _what_ you did!" Dad points out.

"You _don't_! You're always worried about what Isobelle does! You and Mum! And then you get mad at me and Rose when we're upset about it! Isobelle is grown up, she's supposed to be able to live by herself!" Scorpius yells. I don't feel comfortable with them talking about me like this. They don't even know whether or not I'm in the house, and they aren't taking any care to be quiet.

"Scorpius, I have explained this to you _numerous_ times!"

"That doesn't make it any better! Isobelle gets to do whatever she wants to, but if I do it, I get in trouble! You're just easy on her because she's crazy!" Scorpius shouts.

"Don't you _dare_ say that about your sister!"

"She is! She's insane, and we all know it! Even _you_ said things would be less trouble without Isobelle around!"

I can't believe it. Why would Dad say something like that to Scorpius, of all people? Well, maybe he didn't really say it. "Scorpius, you don't get to use my words against me!" So much for that.

"You lied to me," I say, coming around the corner and glaring at Dad. "You want me gone, don't you?"

Dad gives Scorpius a dark look. And, as usual, he's going to blame this on Scorpius being so loud instead of himself for actually saying it. "Isobelle, I-"

"After everything you said to me the other day? Why would you even lie to me like that? And if you've forgotten, it's _you_ who won't let me leave!" I say, raising my voice.

Dad tries again, "Isobelle-"

I put my hand up to cut him off. "No, you _wait_ a second! You thought you could just tell me whatever you wanted, and I would believe you! How _crazy_ of me, right? But I can't help it you know, because it's just habit for me by now!"

I can tell Dad's growing increasingly frustrated. Like he has a reason. "_Isobelle_-"

Scorpius gives me an annoyed look. "Since when did you co me home?"

"About five minutes ago, actually. And you might want to be careful when you talk about me behind my back, because the last time I heard you, I tried to _kill_ myself! Did you know that? I tried to kill myself! You remember that, don't you Dad? That was _quite_ a week! I don't know why I did it, though. Maybe it's because I am fucking _INSANE!_" I scream, waving my hands madly and laughing sarcastically.

"ISOBELLE!" Dad roars, his face flushing.

"Dad, don't try to control me now! You had your chance! I can't even _trust _you anymore! 'Oh, Isobelle, I understand you completely, and I want the best for you'! That's bullshit! _You _just don't want to look bad! You don't give a damn how I turn out as long as it doesn't make you seem any less of a person for it! But you never had to admit it, because you knew I'd believe whatever you told me! Am I really that stupid to you?" I don't know why, but it feels like everything is spilling out my mouth like a broken dam. I can't even help it.

Scorpius and Dad are silent.

"So, we're quiet now? Is that the game we're playing? Well, I don't w_ant_ to play! Really, I have to commend the both of you! Especially you, Scorpius! You can _both_ say that you've been manipulated by Astoria! You can't even form _opinions _for yourself! Con_gra_tulations!" I cheer, clapping my hands together so hard that they begin to hurt. "I hope I'm being crazy enough for you! I hope you enjoy it!"

"Draco, what's going on?" Mum questions, coming down the hallway with a laundry basket. Dad glances at Mum briefly, but doesn't say anything. They're probably having some silent conversation about my mental instability or whatever the hell they like to do. As if I can't understand them.

"Oh, we're having ourselves a _lovely_ conversation, Mum! Please, do join!" I invite her, pulling her by the arm. "I hope you don't have a problem with that, Scorpius, since you've taken it upon yourself to be so _rude_ to Mum! Do you have a problem with that, Scorpius?"

Scorpius looks at me wide-eyed. I don't know why, because this is exactly what he wanted. He shakes his head slowly.

"All right, then! Let's have a conversation with Mum, shall we? What are you doing, Mum? Laundry? How nice of you! Oh, look here, you're doing Scorpius' laundry, too?" I snatch some of Scorpius' robes from the top of the basket. "Oh, Mum, you're too kind! You know, Scorpius doesn't even think you're his mother! His _own_ mother doesn't even do laundry, no reason for you to! Here, Scorpius, you take these! Mum doesn't need them!" I thrust Scorpius' robes into his arms. Some of them fall to the floor.

Mum sets her laundry basket down and puts her arm on my shoulder. "Isobelle, calm down-"

"_Don't_ touch me!" I yell, jerking away from her.

"Go to your room!" Dad shouts.

"Why do I-"

"Just go! And give me your wand!"

I force my wand into Dad's outstretched hand, nearly jabbing him with it. "Fine, because that's the only damned thing that's mine in this house! I am going to my room, and I am going to drink myself into fucking _oblivion!_ No one bother me!" I scream, turning around and stomping off. "_I'm_ crazy?" I scoff. "_You're _all crazy!"

I hear Dad coming after me. "Just give her some time, Draco," Mum says sensibly. I don't know how much of this I can deal with anymore. I can't be lied to, and I certainly can't take any more stress from my family than I already have. The only people who seem to be helping me remotely are Teddy and Mum.

Before I slam my door shut, I hear Scorpius say to Mum, "So you _are _going to do my laundry, right?"

* * *

***(A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! Sorry for major Belle craziness, but it's obvious she's under a lot of stress, and we all know she isn't the most level-headed of sorts. Also, important question: Which one do you like better? Belle/ Teddy, or Belle/ Holden. Honestly, I like both for different reasons (discounting the whole Isobelle and Teddy being related thing.) Again, hope you liked the chapter, leave a review!)**


	15. Blame it on the Pain

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'All I Need' by AwolNation! **

****THANKS for the amazingly super amount of reviews I got from last chapter! It was insane! I swear, you all are the best readers ever! Thanks again, be sure to leave a review!**

*** BT Dubs... I'm going to be doing a Valentine's Day one-shot, time be willing. So, I'm taking pairing/ situation requests from anyone who wants to submit one!**

* * *

Someone knocks on my door. "Come in," I mutter unenthusiastically. After what happened last night, I'm sure that one of my parents is going to attempt to speak to me. I'm not in the mood for any words of advice, or for any apologies.

The door opens and Scorpius walks in. His eyes are downcast, and his bottom lip is pulled between his teeth in apprehension.

"What do you want?" I ask coldly, still upset from yesterday.

"To say sorry," Scorpius answers quietly. I can barely hear him.

"Why are you being so quiet now? You sure haven't minded yelling before..."

Scorpius opens his mouth to say something, then closes it. He has a look of guilt on his face. "Isobelle, are you going to listen to me?"

"You haven't said anything," I point out.

Scorpius frowns and closes the door behind him. He leans on it for a little while, his fist still closed around the doorknob. He blows air out of his nostrils. "Why do you have to give me so much rubbish for all this?" He asks finally.

"Me? _I'm _the one who's giving rubbish?" I repeat, astounded. Of course, like in every other situation, I'm the person at fault. I should be used to it by now.

"You are," Scorpius nods. "You make me feel wrong for wanting to know my mum and _liking_ her, but then you said at first that how you felt about her had nothing to do with how _I _felt about her, and-"

"Scorpius, let me make something abundantly clear. I don't disagree with you getting to know Astoria. I just don't like how you're treating the rest of us worse because of it. I mean, your mother really isn't all that-"

"Isn't what?" Scorpius questions, his eyes narrowing at me. "My mother listens to me more than Mum and Dad do. And she's actually nice to me, and lets me do what I want, and there I'm the only kid!"

"That isn't so great," I tell Scorpius bitterly. "Letting you do whatever you want isn't good parenting. It's the opposite, actually." Until I met Mum, I didn't really get that. Now, I understand exactly what she meant.

"She _is_ a good mother!" Scorpius says defensively.

It's time he knew the truth. It isn't doing Scorpius any good just telling him that he's wrong. Maybe he should know why. "Come here," I say to Scorpius, patting the spot on my bed beside me.

Slowly, Scorpius walks across the carpet and sits on the edge of my bed. His feet nearly touch the ground. "What?" He asks.

"I want to tell you a story."

Scorpius' white-blonde eyebrows come together. "About what?"

"About your mother and I. But you have to promise to listen to me, and I swear everything is the entire truth. All right?"

Scorpius nods. "Okay."

"Well, unlike you, I never knew who my mother was. The only 'mother' I _had_ was Astoria. You know, Dad didn't tell her about me at first. When he finally did, Astoria never said she disapproved of me. So Dad and Astoria went on and got married. Things were fine for a little while, you know. Dad and I got on well, and so did Astoria and I. But then, after about a year, things just... _changed_..." I tell Scorpius.

"Changed? How?" He asks, still seeming a bit reluctant to hear what I have to say.

"I don't really remember what did it. I just remember that suddenly, Astoria wasn't as nice to me as she used to be. She never wanted to talk to me, or play with me, or be _around _me. Only Dad. Of course, when Dad was around, though, she acted as though things were perfectly fine. But they weren't. Not to say that Astoria outright hated me then, but things got worse after you were born."

"Why?" Scorpius questions. He seems to be becoming slightly more interested.

"I don't know for certain. Astoria kind of disappeared for a while after you were born. Not literally, I mean she just stayed in her room all the time. Like she wasn't really interested in you, or in _anything_, actually. Of course, it took me years to understand why that was."

"Why?" Scorpius asks again.

"After Astoria married Dad and had you, she was supposed to have her perfect pureblood family. That's all she wanted- well, to be a _wife_, not a mother. And, According to Astoria, I got in the way of that. _I_ was the reason her family wasn't 'perfect'. I was the reason Dad took time away from looking after _her _son- you- and herself to spend time with me also. Merlin, did she resent me for it. By that point, she actually began to be _rude _to me behind Dad's back," I explain.

Scorpius frowns. "What do you mean?" He asks carefully.

"Astoria would say things to me like how annoying or frustrating I was to her and Dad, or how Dad didn't have time to deal with me. Or her favorite one was that you were much more of a priority than I was, and I was the biggest mistake Dad ever made in his entire life."

"She said that to you?" Scorpius wonders. His lips are set in a thin line, and he's gazing out of the window rather than looking at me.

"Every bit of it. And I know you were too young to remember, but things really got terrible around the time you were five and I was fourteen. That was when Mum finally came into my life. Astoria just couldn't take it, the focus wasn't on her anymore. And then of course it looked bad on Dad, Mum being a muggle-born and all. Apparently, all this was yet again _my_ fault and Astoria said I was to blame. She said she was tired of having to deal with a child that wasn't even _hers_. I want you to think about that for a moment. What if Mum acted like she loved all of us except for you, and you knew it. How would that make you feel?"

Scorpius is silent for a moment, and then he finally answers. "I'd feel really bad," he says honestly. I don't think Scorpius realizes how lucky he is to have a step-mother like Mum. Someone who knows being related to someone isn't the only reason you have to care about them.

"Exactly. But, I'm not done. Those problems Astoria had with me also caused problems between the rest of us, too. Dad would never listen to me when I told him Astoria treated me badly. I even remember the time when Astoria told me if I didn't move out of the Manor and go live with Mum, she'd leave Dad and take you with her," I say. Honestly, other than the day she left, that was one of the worst memories I have of Astoria. I hated the fact that she always felt as if she could use Scorpius to control Dad and I.

"Why didn't she?" Scorpius questions.

I know the obvious answer. _Because she didn't really want him. _But I don't want to hurt Scorpius' feelings by saying that. "She didn't really mean it. I think she was just trying to scare me. She wasn't around much long after that."

Scorpius is looking at me again, eager to hear the rest. It feels like I'm reading a story to him rather than telling my own. "What happened?"

"Well, a couple weeks later, Astoria decided to throw a charity ball at the manor. Mind you, things were tense enough and she thought it wise to add to all that. She just started leaving all the time, being nastier to me, avoiding and ignoring you altogether, and clinging to Dad more and more. Finally, the night of the ball, I suppose Astoria finally got to Dad. Dad and I got into an argument, one thing led to another, and I ended up running away," I tell Scorpius.

"Where did you go?"

"The only place I could think of. Mum's house."

"She wasn't angry with you for running away?" Scorpius asks. Come to think of it, I never did realize that Mum was never upset that I ran away. She was completely understanding about it.

I shake my head. "Not at all. But I ended up staying with Mum. I came home a few days later, and that night, it all came out. You ended up saying that you felt that Astoria treated you badly- you did begin to favor Mum a lot more- and Astoria was furious. She believed I coached you into saying all that, but I didn't. And then she gave Dad an ultimatum: It was either me or her. She made him choose."

"Dad chose you," Scorpius realizes. He has a hint of regret in his voice.

"He did. Astoria left that night. She and Dad were annulled shortly after that. You were a mess- so was Dad- but Mum helped us all through it."

"And that was it? I never saw Mum again?" Scorpius questions.

If only it had been that easy. "I wish. Remember that day school you went to for a year or two?"

Scorpius nods, a confused look on his face. "Yeah...why?"

"Well, one day, Dad and I came to pick you up, and you were gone. Astoria had taken you, and we had no idea where. Mister Zabini told us there could have been a possibility that we wouldn't see you again. That was the worst day of my life," I tell Scorpius truthfully. He was one of the only lights in the dismal life that I had.

"Well, how did I come back home?" Scorpius asks. He has a very troubled look on his face.

"Mum," I answer simply. "She figured it all out. And you have Uncle Harry to thank, too," I inform him.

A surprised look comes across Scorpius' face. "Mum got me back home?"

I nod. "She did. Scorpius, Mum always loved you like you were hers. You told her so many times that you wanted her to be your mother instead of Astoria," I inform him. And now that Mum is is Scorpius' life for good, he takes her for granted.

"Oh. So did my mother get in trouble for taking me?"

Merlin, did she. "Yes. Well, they gave her a trial or something like that, and she ended up confessing to kidnapping you... and trying to kill me," I admit.

Scorpius shakes his head vigorously. "You're lying," he says quietly.

"I'm not. Scorpius, you can ask Mum or Dad. And you know how Mum is about telling the truth," I remind him. Even though I'm making suggestions, I can tell by the look on his face that Scorpius already believes me. I rarely ever lie to him. And even then, those are generally white lies.

"Then what?" Scorpius asks, his voice barely audible.

"Astoria went to Azkaban. She got out about a month and a half later. But you never saw her again," I tell him, knowing he's about to ask.

_"Azkaban..." _Scorpius rests his elbows on his knees and puts his head in his hands. I rest my hand comfortingly on his back, and he doesn't say anything for a long while. I feel terrible that I had to tell Scorpius all of this, but he does need to know.

"Sorry for saying I hated you," he apologizes quietly. "And being a git."

"It's fine. I'm sorry for yelling at you yesterday."

Scorpius does something unexpected. He puts his head into my chest, embracing me in a tight hug. I haven't seen any sort of affection from Scorpius in about three weeks. It's nice to know he's still human.

"I'm sorry," he says again, his voice muffled and his face buried in my robes. "I didn't know..."

"I know you didn't. And I shouldn't have been angry at you for not knowing. I love you, Scor. I really do."

"I love you, too," Scorpius mutters.

"Now may I ask you something?" I say.

Scorpius nods. "Yeah."

"What made you want to come and apologize?"

Scorpius pulls back and looks at me for a while. "I'm leaving soon," he says finally.

I frown. "Leaving to where?"

Scorpius gives me a sheepish look. "To my mum's house. I just wanted to say sorry before I left. But, now I don't want to go with her," Scorpius tells me nervously.

"Go with her," I say under my breath. "Scorpius, is Astoria _here?_" I question.

Scorpius bites his lip again and then nods. "But just you, me, and Dad are at home," he tells me. What a coincidence, Mum has 'conviently' taken her children out for the day.

"Why is she here?" I question, unable to hide the anger in my voice. "Did Dad know?"

"I think so. She told me that she just wanted to talk to Dad next time. I don't know about what," Scorpius tells me.

"Scorpius!" Dad shouts. "Come downstairs!"

Socrpius sighs. "I guess it's time for me to go," he says dismally. I want to tell Scorpius he should stay here, but that decision is up to him. Besides, I wouldn't want it to make Astoria crazy.

"All right, then. Give me another hug."

It seems as if Scorpius has something different on his mind. "Actually, will you come downstairs with me? I don't want to go by myself," Scorpius questions.

I nod and give him a small smile. "Sure I will." I'm just glad Scorpius feels as if he can trust me again. "Now, come on. There isn't anything to be afraid of."

Scorpius and I walk out of my bedroom. He glances downward into the foyer, gripping the railing of the balcony above. Dad and Astoria are below, arguing, or having a hateful discussion. It's a little bit of both.

"Scorpius is just as much my son as he is yours," Astoria tells Dad. Her tone isn't angry. Instead, it's very patronizing. "I honestly don't like how he's been raised. Dare I say, _Isobelle_ behaves more like a pureblood than he does, and she's nothing near it. Draco, you should be _ashamed _of yourself."

"Ashamed?" Dad says in a mocking tone. "_I'm_ the one who should be ashamed of myself? What about you? You're so terribly bent on getting your revenge on me that you're using your own _son!_ Don't pretend for one second that you actually care about him!" Dad shouts. Scorpius flinches.

Astoria smirks. "How I feel about Scorpius has nothing to do with you, Draco! Besides, this isn't about him. How can you make me out to be such a terrible monster?"

"It's quite easy, you see..."

Astoria ignores Dad. "I did what I could for this family. I was _faithful _to you!"

Dad falters for a second, seeming confused. "I was faithful to you as well, Astoria," he says stiffly.

Scorpius glances at me for a moment, then turns back to Astoria and Dad. "Draco, Draco, Draco... I hope you don't think I'm _that_ stupid? We've only been separated seven years. Nina's nearly six and a half years old. I'll let you deduct the rest for yourself," Astoria tells Dad. She seems nearly at the point of laughter.

Dad frowns. Astoria really is smarter than anyone gives her credit for. And Dad knows he can't tell Astoria the truth. He has to lead her to believe that he did in fact cheat on her. Scorpius' knuckles turn white. "You've said all you need to. I want Scorpius home by eight," Dad says firmly.

"Oh, no need to give him a curfew. He'll be with me," Astoria reminds Dad, rolling her eyes.

"That is exactly what I'm worried about, Astoria."

"What? You're worried that he might actually be brought up correctly? You're so hopeless. Where is Scorpius, anyway?"

"Upstairs, he should be on his way down."

Astoria grins and clasps her hands together. "Perfect. Then, I'll just go-"

"No, you _won't._ Don't think for a second that I'm going to allow you into his room," Dad tells Astoria.

She clicks her tongue with a bored expression on her face. "Fine, then. Call him again. I'm on a rather tight schedule."

Dad cranes his neck backward. "Scorpius! Come downstairs!" At that moment, his eyes drift upward, an he sees Scorpius and I standing there, eavesdropping. Astoria follows his gaze, and an amused look crosses her face when her eyes meet mine.

"My, my. It's just like old times, isn't it?" She questions. I don't understand what Astoria means by that, but I'm not too eager to find out. "Scorpius, come down here and say hello to me."

Scorpius swallows hard and he gives me an apprehensive look. I nod, telling him it's okay to go. Astoria notices this and as soon as Scorpius turns his head, she gives me a dirty look. "Afternoon, Mum," Scorpius says quietly, his eyes not meeting hers.

Astoria clenches her jaw for a brief second, then smiles at Scorpius. "Scorpius, honey, I told you to come _downstairs_," she says again.

Scorpius takes his hands from the banister and walks stiffly past me. His arm brushes mine slightly, and I understand what he means. He wants me to come with him.

I follow Scorpius downstairs and stand beside Dad. Even though I'm still angry at him, I'll always defend him in front of Astoria.

Scorpius walks tentatively up to Astoria, and she wraps him in an embrace that he only half-returns. It doesn't take Astoria long to notice how uncomfortable he is. "What's wrong, Scorpius? Are you not feeling well?"

"No, I er, feel fine... Can I ask you something?"

Astoria nods slowly. "Yes, anything."

"Why did you leave?" Scorpius blurts out, his eyes darting between Astoria and Dad. Dad remains silent, probably wondering what excuse Astoria will come up with.

"Scorpius, I already told you why," Astoria tells Scorpius in an irritated tone.

Scorpius nods his head. "I know that. But I want you to tell me _really_ why."

"What do you mean, 'really' why? Dear, we don't have time for this. My parents are expecting us for dinner, and you still need to be dressed properly, and-"

"Was it because of Isobelle?" Scorpius asks, cutting her off. Astoria looks affronted. Dad raises his eyebrows in intrigue.

"Of course not, Scorpius! I don't know what she told you, but-"

"Why do you have to assume I told him anything?" I ask Astoria, crossing my arms. "Can't he just have a question? Unless I'd have a _reason_ to tell him something, of course..."

Astoria narrows her blue eyes at me. "Why, certainly. It's just a question isn't it, Scorpius?"

Scorpius looks between Dad and I, then nods. "Y-yeah..." he stammers. "Just a question."

Astoria puts her hand under Scorpius' chin. "Are you lying to me, Scorpius?" she questions, giving him a disapproving look. "Do you know something that I don't?"

I'm expecting Dad to step in at one point or another, but he remains silent. I suppose he's beginning to realize what's really happening.

"No," Scorpius says truthfully.

Astoria raises her eyebrows. "Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, I don't like to be lied to," Astoria chides.

Scorpius cringes at hearing his full name. "I'm- I'm not."

"Why would you ask me something like that?" She questions.

Scorpius shrugs. "I don't know. I was just wondering, because you never tallk about Isobelle. You knew her better than you knew me," he points out.

Astoria seems angered, but she doesn't say so. "Scorpius, Isobelle isn't my child. _You_ are." And there it goes.

Scorpius' facial expression changes a few times, like he's trying to think of a way to respond to that. "Well, Mum says no matter what, I'm still hers. And Dad treats Rose and Hugo the same as me. Why don't you treat Isobelle like that?" He asks finally.

A smile comes across Dad's face. "Please, enlighten us, Astoria," he tells her mockingly.

Astoria gives him a scathing look, then turns back to Scorpius. "Don't compare me to your father and _step_-mother. What happened between Isobelle and I is between her and I, and it isn't for you to ask about. Do you understand me?"

"Actually, I don't understand why it has to be kept private. Why is it, Astoria, that you like to do everything behind everyone's backs? If you don't like me, you can say so," I tell her. There's no way in hell I'd ever let Astoria play Scorpius for a fool. "If you don't want Scorpius to lie to you, don't lie to him. I believe that's fair."

Astoria turns to me. "Isobelle, I don't believe that is _up _to you to decide what is and isn't fair for Scorpius. _I'm _his mother!"

"It's frightening how life so often puts us in situations in which we don't want to _be_, isn't it?" I counter, giving Astoria a steely gaze.

Astoria's nostrils flare for a moment, but she says nothing back. "I don't have time for this. Scorpius, we need to leave now. Come," she orders, beckoning her hand as if Scorpius is a dog. Scorpius stays glued to his spot. "_Now,_ Scorpius. I won't repeat myself."

Scorpius gives Dad an uneasy look. Dad doesn't say anything, but he seems to be having a silent conversation with Scorpius.

"Actually, I _did_ lie to you," Scorpius confesses. "I'm sorry."

Astoria turns around so fast her robes billow behind her. "About what?" she demands.

Scorpius shuffles his feet. "I really _don't_ feel well. Sorry, but can I stay home today?" he asks. I can't help the smile that tugs at the corners of my mouth.

Astoria seems slightly confused and taken aback, as if she'd expected Scorpius to admit something different. "I already made plans, Scorpius. It's rude to cancel," she informs him, doing worse and worse to hide her anger.

"I know, but I really feel sick. I've been in my room all day, and then Isobelle came to see if I was feeling better, but I'm not," Scorpius lies. "I want to go, but I know it's good to stay in bed when you're sick, so I think I should do that. I'm sorry."

"Scorpius, I really am disappointed in you. But, regardless, I hope you feel better," Astoria says tightly. She gives Scorpius a loose hug, and throws both Dad and I looks of utter disgust. Dad seems to be entertained at the least.

"Goodbye," Scorpius tells Astoria. She doesn't say anything in return before she disapparates. Good riddance.

Scorpius still looks uncomfortable, and he seems confused about what just happened. "Is she mad at me?" he asks finally.

Dad nods. "Most likely," he answers truthfully. But Dad doesn't seem upset about it. I think he's just glad that Scorpius got to get a taste of what Astoria's really like. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Isobelle told me all those things about her," Scorpius admits. "I didn't know. She was always nice to me."

Dad turns to me. "You _told_ him?" he questions.

"He needed to know. You can't be angry at me for that." Then again, Dad gets angry at me for nearly everything that I do. It wouldn't be that far off.

"I'm not," Dad says. "Thank you, Isobelle."

I know this is some sort of apology from Dad, but I'm not ready to accept it. Now that Astoria's gone, I don't feel the need to take his side. "I did it for Scorpius, not for you."

I smile at Scorpius and put my hand on his shoulder. I'm just glad that there's no more tension between the two of us. That's all I'm concerned about. "Let's get you back to bed, you sick little liar."

* * *

**(A/N: Hooray for less git-Scorpius-ness! I figured it was about time that Belle told him the truth, and Astoria started being more upfront!**

**So, a lot of people are confused as to how exactly Belle and Teddy are related. I'm going to explain this the best I can. Isobelle and Teddy are second cousins. This means that they share a set of great grandparents (Cygnus and Druella Black), and that one of their grandparents would be siblings with the other (Narcissa and Andromeda). Also, one of their parents would be biological first cousins (Draco and Tonks). Second cousins pretty much means that there are two generation between you until you have a set of common ancestors (parents and grandparents for Teddy and Belle). I hope that wasn't too confusing!**

***Thanks for reading, and leave a review!**

*** BT Dubs... I'm going to be doing a Valentine's Day one-shot, time be willing. So, I'm taking pairing/ situation requests to anyone who wants to submit one!**


	16. A Thousand Lies and a Good Disguise

***Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling!**

***Sorry for being so long on the update! Hope I didn't kill any of y'all making you wait!**

****Title of the chap comes from "You're Gonna Go Far, Kid" by 'The Offspring'. Leave a review!**

* * *

Teddy finally opens his eyes and looks at me. "What's wrong?" he questions, noticing the pensive look on my face as he yawns. Teddy kisses my forehead , and dark turquoise stubble tickles the top of my head.

I shrug, glancing up at the ceiling. It's dark in Teddy's room. The blankets are pulled up to my chest, and my hands are folded over my stomach. "We can't do this forever," I inform him, my voice gravelly from sleep.

Teddy nods solemnly, wrapping one of my curls around his finger. It seems he likes to play with my hair. "Can't do what?" he asks curiously, wrinkling his eyebrows.

"We can't keep sleeping together. Honestly, I just came over to talk to you, and _this_ happened. We can't act like this is okay to do, because it isn't," I tell Teddy.

"Who's acting? I know this isn't okay," Teddy mutters nonchalantly. He places a kiss on my neck. "But I don't mind it, either."

"Then why won't you break up with Victoire?" I demand suddenly. "What are you waiting for?"

Teddy gives me a blank look. "You and Holden haven't broken up," he points out.

"Well, we're a lot closer to it than you and Victoire. Merlin, Teddy, you don't just get to be with me on the side because you're frustrated with her!"

"It sounds like you're more frustrated than me," Teddy mutters, giving me a confused look. "Where's all this coming from?"

"It isn't fair," I whisper, avoiding Teddy's gaze. "She gets to wake up to you all the time and I don't. She doesn't deserve someone who loves her as much as you do."

Teddy nods suddenly, giving me a slow kiss. He lets his lips linger near mine. "I know. _You_ deserve that."

"I don't want this to have to be a secret forever," I tell Teddy. "I love you."

"I know. I love you, too. But we have to work things out first, okay?"

"How long is that going to be?" I wonder, my voice sounding much more like a whine than I intended.

"I'm not sure, honestly. But it will be worth it. You know that, right?"

"Yes," I nod. I purse my lips in thought. "Teddy?"

"Hmm?"

"How do you do it?"

Teddy furrows his eyebrows. "How do I do what, Belle?"

"Make me feel like you love me so much. It's only been a few weeks. I've been with Holden seven _years_, and you still love me just as much," I explain. Ever since I met him, Teddy has always been so caring and understanding toward me. Still, I never thought his actions would result in _this._

"I guess I always _did _love you," Teddy admits. He looks a bit embarrassed to admit it, but not at all ashamed of how he feels. "It was just something about you. A vulnerability, I guess."

I'm sort of shocked when Teddy tells me this. When I think about it though, I suppose it was feasible. Maybe that was the reason he always was so kind to me. "Why didn't you tell me?" I ask.

"You were in love with Holden," Teddy reminds me. "That wouldn't have been what you wanted."

"And look where doing what I wanted got me," I mutter sarcastically, rolling my eyes. I glance up at the ceiling.

"You didn't know this was going to happen," Teddy reminds me, his voice reassuring.

"I'm not just talking about Holden, I'm talking about always- and _now. _How can you even look at me, Teddy? You say you're Holden's best friend, but are you really?"

Teddy nods, seeming slightly confused. "Of course, I am."

"You can't be. If you really were such a good friend to Holden, you wouldn't be with me right now. Do you understand?" I question.

Teddy frowns. "That doesn't mean we _aren't_ best friends, Belle. Remember how you said whatever we did, you would still love Holden?" he counters. I don't like Teddy's tone of voice. It sounds like he's arguing with me.

"That's _different_," I sigh.

"Yeah? How?"

"You know that Holden and I- that we're..."

"That you're what?" Teddy turns over on his side and props his head with his elbow, looking at me with interest. His expression frustrates me.

"We're taking a _break_ from each other," I say. "You're just ignoring Victoire. That's even worse."

"I don't think either is worse than the other," Teddy tells me. "We're both equally wrong. You don't think so?"

Teddy trails his finger lightly over the space between my collarbone. "I know it's wrong, Teddy, but it's just that... I mean, I feel terrible, but at the same time I don't, and that makes me feel even more guilty."

_"What?"_ Teddy questions.

I take a deep breath. "Do you remember, Teddy, when I thought my Dad was cheating on Mum, and how upset I became? And now I'm doing the same thing. I should be disgusted with myself, but I'm not. Why is that?" I questions. At first, I felt completely terrible for cheating on Holden. Now, I don't feel as bad. I just want to know why my mindset has changed so much.

"Maybe it's because this makes you feel better? Because you felt as if you were lacking something with Holden?"

"Respect?" I mumble. Teddy pretends not to hear me, but I know that he does. "And what are you lacking with Victoire?"

Teddy bites his bottom lip. "Belle, that's between-"

"I told you, now you have to tell me," I reason, giving Teddy a pleading look. I learned it from Hugo and Nina.

Teddy shakes his head, then looks at me and sighs. "My God, how can I say no to that face?"

"You can't." I give Teddy a small smile.

"Well, Victoire and I never really say eye-to-eye," Teddy starts.

"I thought the only person she ever was agreeable with was _you_?" I question. Teddy seems like he wants to laugh. "So why do you love her, then?"

Teddy shrugs. "You know those people you just love, but you don't know why?"

"No." Everyone I love, I have actual reasons for doing so. "If you can't think of any reasons, then perhaps you don't really love Victoire. Maybe you've just been with her so long that you don't feel as if you can break up with her?" Sometimes, I feel as if that's the case with Holden and I.

"I don't know," Teddy mutters. "I mean, I guess. Sounds like you and Holden, hmm?"

"Well, Holden was my first boyfriend, and only so far. Was Victoire your first?"

"No. And I _definitely_ wasn't Victoire's first," Teddy informs me, his face falling a bit.

I study his face. "Why did you say it like that?" I ask.

Teddy's quiet for a while. "Well, Victoire had a bit of a... _reputation_ a while ago. Some things happened with a few blokes, and she sort of turned to me. We'd already pretty much grown up together, and we were already friends, so it kind of just went from there," Teddy explains. He sounds like he pities Victoire a bit, and that makes me a bit jealous. I have to remind myself that I'm not yet officially anything more to Teddy than someone he can share his bed with.

"So, yeah," Teddy mutters, filling the silence. "It's not like it wasn't her fault, though." Victoire is rather talented at causing problems for others.

"Oh." Teddy and I remain silent for a while. He glances down at me. My body's curled into his, and my head is on his chest. Teddy has his arm around my shoulder, rubbing small circles. It's calm, and quiet, and relaxing. It's just what I need.

"Aye, Ted! You up?" A voice shouts, stirring both Teddy and I. I'd know it anywhere.

My eyes widen, and Teddy nearly falls out of the bed. _"Shit!"_ he curses under his breath. "It's Holden!"

"What am I going to do?" I whisper back. "I can't leave! My cloak, my shoes- they're all in your living room! He'll know I was here!"

Teddy hastily tugs on a pair of trousers. "Just... stay here a moment, and get dressed," he tells me, doing his best to stay calm.

"Teddy? You can't _still_ be asleep!" Holden calls.

"Er... I'm coming!" Teddy replies, shooing me away from the door with his hand. Teddy steps out and closes the door, locking it behind him. I press my ear to it. I can hear Teddy and Holden begin to talk. Their voices carry from the hallway.

"Did I interrupt something?" Holden asks cautiously. Merlin, did he ever?

"No, I was just in bed... sleeping in," Teddy answers, doing his best not to sound like he's making everything up.

"It's nearly eleven," Holden points out. "Besides, it sounded like you were talking to someone. Like a _girl_, Ted," Holden says suggestively. Oh, damn.

Teddy's silent for a moment. "Well, I-"

Holden starts laughing. I'm not sure whether this is good or bad. "I get what's happening."

"You _do?_" Teddy sounds choked up.

"Yeah, course I do," Holden repeats. "If you've got Victoire over, you just have to say so. I won't mind." I let out a sigh of relief.

"But-" Teddy starts.

"Nah, it's fine. I remember Belle and I used to be like that," Holden tells Teddy in a flat voice. Who's fault is it that we aren't that way anymore?

"And now you aren't?" Teddy questions, shaking his head.

Holden sounds like he wants to laugh again. That hurts my feelings. "God, no. I don't even know what Belle and I are, anymore. I mean, I love her, but I can't deal with her all the time, y'know?"

"Yeah," Teddy mutters. "But she really is trying."

"How do you know that?" Holden questions skeptically. Teddy has to answer without giving anything away.

"Because I know Belle, and so do you. Just be patient with her," Teddy says.

"I shouldn't have to be. I have to be _patient _with my nine-year-old sister. I shouldn't have to be patient with my twenty-one-year-old _girlfriend_. Especially when she keeps making the same mistakes over and over again," Holden replies. I'm not sure what to think. It isn't like Holden's never told me any of this before. It just frustrates me that he'll so easily repeat it to someone else. Can we have no privacy?

"Well, you have to look at it from Belle's perspective. She never really had anyone to teach her those kinds of things. She didn't have a relationship with her parents like you do. She _still _doesn't," Teddy reminds Holden.

"I know that, and I knew it then, too. But I fell in love with Belle when she was fourteen. She still isn't any different." Teddy doesn't say anything back. Holden clears his throat. "Yeah, well enough of that. You gonna be ready to go soon?"

"Go?" Teddy repeats. He sounds just as confused as I am.

"Victoire must have really done a job on you. We're going to the Tornadoes match, remember? Had the tickets for months."

"Oh, yeah. I just blanked, I guess," Teddy replies. I can tell that the still doesn't remember making plans for this weekend.

"Yeah, so go get dressed," Holden tells him. "They start at noon. I'll just watch T.V. or something while I wait."

"No!" Teddy says quickly. "Er, I mean, can you go make some coffee? I'm still not fully up yet."

"Um... okay," Holden agrees cautiously. "You sure you're okay, Ted?"

"Yeah, fine. I'm just going to... shower now." I hear Teddy's footsteps grow closer to the door. "Alohomora," he whispers, opening the door.

"How did you forget he was coming over today?" I ask angrily, keeping my voice low.

Teddy sighs. "I don't know, I just haven't thought about it, I guess. Look, Holden's in the kitchen right now. Just go to the living room and get your things-"

"What if he sees me?"

"He won't," Teddy assures me. "Just be quick, because I don't want-"

"Because _you_? Holden's _my _boyfriend," I remind Teddy. "Besides, why can't I just summon them? It isn't like we're muggles."

"Holden will definitely notice objects flying around my flat. Belle, I'm sorry," Teddy apologizes. "I'll see you later."

I don't say anything back before I open Teddy's door. He pulls it closed quietly. I can hear Holden moving around in the kitchen. Doing my best to be completely silent, I tiptoe through the hallway until I'm in the living room. I stoop down to grab my cloak from the sofa, and slip on my shoes. I glance over my shoulder to make sure Holden hasn't heard me. So far, so good.

Now that I've got all my things, I can leave. This went better than expected.

"Going somewhere?" My heart nearly jumps in my throat as I look up. It's Holden. He has the television remote in his hand, and a coffee mug in the other. He frowns at me.

"Home," I answer nonchalantly. If I act nervous, Holden will believe I have a reason to be.

"Why're you here in the first place?"

"I came to speak to Teddy," I answer. That isn't a lie. It's just not the entire truth.

"This early? Seems like you've been hear a while. I mean, your hair looks rather slept-in. And your clothes _don't._"

I brush off Holden's comment. "Why does it matter? You've made it quite clear you don't care about me. Now if you'll excuse me."

Holden looks absolutely enraged. He slams down his coffee mug so hard, liquid sloshes over the edge. He tightly grabs my arm. I wince.

"Holden, what are you-? Let me go."

"No. We're going to ask Teddy about this, because I don't believe you," Holden tells me, marching me to Teddy's bedroom. Without warning, he throws open the door. Luckily, Teddy's dressed. He's sitting on his bed with his head in his hands. Teddy's expression turns to one of pure shock when he sees Holden and I.

"What the hell is this?" Holden demands, raising his voice.

"Belle came over to talk to me this morning," Teddy answers quickly.

"I told you that already."

Holden ignores me. "Why'd you lie to me, Ted?"

Teddy furrows his eyebrows. "What?"

"You said Victoire was over."

"No, I didn't," Teddy shakes his head. He gives me a look, but I don't know what he means by it. It makes me feel guilty.

"You went along with it. Why?" Holden questions. I can tell Holden's growing angrier and more suspicious by the second.

"You didn't even give me time to get a word in. Look, I don't know what you're all worked up about-"

"You _'don't know'_?" Holden shouts. "Belle is _my_ girlfriend, she's at _your_ flat, and the _both_ of you are acting like there's something going on I don't know about! Why didn't you just tell me that she was over here?"

"Holden, calm down," I say gently, trying to pry Holden's hand off of me. Teddy looks on, seeming rather surprised. He must believe that this is what I've been going through with Holden the entire time.

"Don't tell me what to do," he snaps. "One of you better tell me what the hell is going on-"

"_Nothing_ is going on! Holden, you told me that we weren't together anymore, so who else am I supposed to speak to? It was never a problem _before_ that I spoke to Teddy!" I remind him.

"That's because you never talked to him in his sodding _bedroom_, Belle! Let's not pretend, we _both_ know you can be a real whore when you want to be!"

I gasp at Holden's utter display of immaturity. No matter what, he shouldn't have said that to me. "Holden..." I whimper.

"Come on, Holden. That was uncalled for," says Teddy, coming to my defense.

Holden glares at Teddy. "Don't be stupid! See, this is what Belle likes to do! She likes making herself the victim! She just wants your damned pity!"

"Maybe she _is_ the victim if _this_ is how you treat her," Teddy points out, raising his eyebrows in a challenging manner.

Holden trains his eyes on me, waiting for me to say something. His grip tightens around my arm.

"Teddy, Holden loves me. I told you that," I mutter, staring at the ground. "Holden cares about me." I feel as if I'm reciting lines rather than saying what I truly feel.

"Really, Belle? Because I've _never _put my hands on Victoire, or called her any sort of name," Teddy reminds me. From what he told me earlier, that means a lot for him to say that. "She's more to me than that."

Holden shakes his head at Teddy like everything he's saying is bullshit. "Feel free to quit stroking her ego. You're just telling her what she wants to hear!"

"Yeah, the _truth_," Teddy counters.

"That game gets old!" I'm not even sure what's going on right now. What's Holden talking about?

"What game?" I ask timidly.

Holden rolls his eyes at me. "Are you really that blind? It's what Teddy always does! He likes to take the weakest girl he can find, and feed her a bunch of shit about how special or important she is just to make her feel good about herself. That's what he did to Victoire, and that's what he's doing to you!"

Holden's lying to me. He has to be. I don't care what Holden says, I know Teddy genuinely cares for me.

"No, he isn't. Some people can just be caring, Holden," I tell him. "And you don't have to speak to Teddy like that. He's your best friend."

"I would think that my best friend wouldn't lie to me," Holden says under his breath.

"Who's lying to you?" Teddy questions.

"Both of you. Do you really think I believe that you were just _talking_? You can at least make the bed when you're done."

I feel like I've just been slapped across the face or doused with a bucket of freezing water. "Holden, it's not- Teddy and I, we never-"

"Belle, you may be stupid, but I'm not. If you want to fuck your own _cousin_, that's fine by me. If your self-esteem's really that low, then that's on you. Just don't over talk to me again," Holden tells me. He finally lets my arm goo and takes two quidditch tickets out of his pocket. He thrusts them into my chest. "You two enjoy yourselves."

I'd much rather see Holden angry than disappointed. The fact that he's given up hurts me so much more. "Holden!" I cry, going after him. "Please, just let me explain-"

"Belle, there's nothing you _can_ explain! You cheated on me with my best friend! Doesn't that mean _anything_ to you?" Of course, it means something to me, but it also means something to me that Holden just wants to give up.

"This isn't just my fault! You _hurt _me!" I remind him.

Holden wheels around, and I fear that I made a mistake in pursuing him. "So that gives you the right to cheat on me? I may have wanted nothing more than to be rid of you at points, but I would have _never_ cheated on you! Especially with someone you were close to!"

"I'm _sorry_! Holden, _please_ don't do this! Please, don't!" I beg. "I _love_ you!"

"I bet you told Teddy you loved him, too," Holden mutters. "Quit crying, I'm sure you weren't that upset before I showed up." The sad thing is, I _did_ tell Teddy that_._ But it was _Holden_ who made me feel as if I had to go to Teddy in the first place.

"You pushed me away. You treated me like shit, and I still defended you in front of _everyone! _Because I love you! You don't know how difficult it is, pretending that your relationship is going perfect when it isn't!"

Holden shakes his head. "Well, you can quit pretending now, because I'm _done_. I'm breaking up with you. You aren't my girlfriend anymore. You aren't _anything_ to me anymore!"

I reach out to touch Holden's arm. "You don't mean that. You _know_ you don't! Please, don't be so thoughtless!" I plead. Holden won't meet my eyes, and that angers me. I know I was wrong, but he owes it to me to at least _listen_. "Look at me, I'm speaking to you!"

Holden refuses to look at me.

I shake my head. "Fine, then I'm done as well. If you don't respect me, why should I even be sorry?"

I turn to walk away. Before I can, Holden's hand clamps around my jaw and turns my neck to face him. Holden's been angry with me before, but he's never put his hands on my face. _Ever._ "I don't _respect_ you?" He demands, his eyes now boring into mine. I wonder if it's a trick question. "Belle, I respect you way more than you respect me! I respect you more than you respect _yourself!_"

I pray that Teddy doesn't see this. If he does, I'm not sure what he'll do. I take a deep breath. I don't even try to escape Holden's grasp. "You think _this_ is respect? Holden, you can't put your hands on me, or call me names, or yell at me. And I can't let you. If that's what you think is all right to do, then I'm better off letting you go," I tell him quietly. It took every ounce of power left in me to speak those words.

Holden looks at me like he doesn't even recognize me. I can't say that I know who he's become, either. "Then it's over. For real," he says in an even voice.

I nod my head as best I can. "For real. Now please, Holden, let me go."

Holden's grip on my chin slackens and his hand drops. I close my eyes and exhale a shaky breath. When I open my eyes again, I see Holden walking away. He disapparates.

The next thing I know, I'm crying, and sliding down the wall until I'm sitting down, my arms hugged around my knees.

Teddy comes out of his bedroom and looks down at me. "Merlin, Belle, did he...?" Teddy's voice trails off, and he kneels down in front of me.

"He- he... _left_." Is all I am able to say. Teddy wraps his arms around me in a comforting gesture, and lets me put my head on his shoulder and cry some more. His expression seems troubled as well, like he wants to tell me something.

I know what Teddy wants to say, because I'm thinking it, too: We messed up.

* * *

**(A/N: Sorry for not updating in forever! Been busy with school, and my science team (does that sound lame?) And today, I was busting my butt to get this chap up, and then for the first time in two years, it **_**SNOWED**_**! I just had to play in it like a little kid for a bit :). **

**So, the truth finally came out. Kinda expected,the way things have been going. Still, hope it kept you all on your toes! Love y'all, thanks for reading, leave a review letting me know whtat you thought! Hope I did this chapter right!**


	17. Dwell in My Disasters

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!  
**

*** You all know that I try to update as soon as I can, and that isn't going to change. However, I've recently began working on a completely original story, and I'm hoping that doesn't get in the way of things! I just wanted to say, that I wouldn't have even thought of doing so without the encouragement of some of you! You don't know how much it means to me!**

***Title of this chapter comes from 'Empty' by Ray LaMontagne**

***Thanks for reading, leave a review!**

* * *

I sob some more into Teddy's shoulder, and he rubs my back. Holden just broke up with me. I'm still in complete shock, and I can feel my shoulders shaking. I thought I'd be better off without Holden, but now I feel as if my lungs have been stripped of their oxygen. I don't know _how _to be without Holden. I'm not positive I really want to know.

"It's okay, Belle," Teddy whispers into my hair.

"N-no, it's not!" I cry. Does he not realize that Holden just _left _me? Of course, he believes things are okay, because he's still with Victoire.

"Holden shouldn't have treated you the way he did. Things are going to be better this way, you'll see."

I think about what Holden said to Teddy, how he likes to take the weakest girl he can find... is that really what hes been doing to me?

"Stop," I tell Teddy, pulling away from him suddenly. "_Stop_ it!"

Teddy has a look of confusion on his face. I'm not sure why, because he knows exactly what he's doing.

"Stop what, Belle?" He asks.

"Stop speaking to me like that! Stop feeding me your _lies_ like you've been doing this entire time! I was _distraught_ when I came to you, I would have believed _anything_ you said! You manipulated me into kissing you that first time!" I shout, my fists clenched.

"What? No, Belle, that isn't-"

"That _is_ what happened, Teddy! You made me believe Holden was so terrible to me, when he only cared! The only one who was hurting me was _you!_" Perhaps Holden put his hands on me, but maybe I did more to provoke him than I realized. Teddy made me so blind to it, and I hate him for that. I just want him to suffer like he's making me.

"_Holden _hurt you! I saw the way he grabbed you! And you told me that he's done it before! Belle, you told me you _knew _that Holden had no business touching you like that!" Teddy reminds me.

I shake my head. "I let Holden walk away from me because of you! Holden was my boyfriend, he was trying to reprove me! You wanted to take me away from him for _yourself!_ Because I was weak, and you knew you could take advantage of me!"

Teddy reaches forward to put his hand on my shoulder. I move away. "Don't you dare touch me again! Maybe Holden was right! I _do _like to make myself a victim too much! That's what led me to _you!_"

"And that's exactly what you'll be if you try to get Holden to take you back! A _victim!_" Teddy raises his voice at me out of frustration. _I'm_ the one who's been deceived.

"I'm already, a victim, Teddy! At _your _hands!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Teddy demands.

I pull my knees protectively to my chest again and shrink away from Teddy. "I never wanted to sleep with you. You told me we could talk, and I came to your bedroom because I knew you would be in there. When you saw me, you knew I was upset. I was crying, and you- you put your hands in my hair, and you were very kind to me, and you made me trust you. And then you locked the door, and you _forced_ yourself onto me! I told you no, but you didn't listen! You said you would hurt me again if I told anyone," I explain to Teddy, all the while giving him a look of pure hatred.

Teddy's eyes widen, and his mouth gapes open. "That didn't happen!" Teddy yells. If it didn't, why does he seem so afraid?

"Yes, it did! And how could I ever tell Holden that his _own_ friend would do this to me? You attacked me, Teddy! In the most terrible way a man could _ever_ attack a woman! " Thinking about it, I begin to cry some more. "But Holden came this morning, and I _had_ to tell him the truth. I couldn't possibly have him thinking I consented to any of this!"

"Which you did!" Teddy counters.

"You can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to me, Teddy. You deserve to be punished for what you did."

"_Punished?_" Teddy repeats in disbelief. "My God.."

I nod my head solemnly. Why is Teddy acting like he's so innocent? "My father will be furious when I tell him. So will Grandfather. He has the Ministry at his every beck and call. He may hate me, but he hates you a lot more. I don't think there's going to be much hope for you," I inform Teddy.

Teddy runs his fingers through his hair and shakes his head. "This is insane..." he mutters. "Belle, you _know _I didn't do anything to you!"

"Teddy, I'm not going along with your lies anymore. I told you that this couldn't work, and you persisted anyway. Perhaps you should have listened to me. I'm going home to go speak to my parents. My mother is going to tell Uncle Harry what you did to me."

I stand up, and Teddy grabs my hand. "Belle, you can't lie about this! You'll get me sent to Azkaban! Getting me arrested isn't going to make Holden want you back!" Of course, it will. After this entire misunderstanding is cleared up, Holden will realize the mistake he made.

"You're just lying to me again!" I snap. "Let me go!"

Teddy doesn't relinquish the grip on my hand. "Belle, I'm sorry, but I can't. Not until you promise me that you know you're lying."

"_You're _the liar! Let go of me! You're hurting me!" I scream, hoping some of the residents in the flats around Teddy's will hear. "Teddy, you're _hurting_ me! _Stop!"_

Teddy rises to his feet and puts his hand over my mouth. This scares me.

"Belle, calm down!" Teddy says a bit harshly. I still scream, but my voice is muffled. I try to kick Teddy, but he's holding me back. He steers me to the chair in the corner of the room. "Sit down!" He orders, his hand still over my mouth.

Why is Teddy doing this to me? Why is he being so forceful? "Belle, I can't let you go until you understand that you're _lying_," he tells me again.

I shake my head and try to writhe away from Teddy. I am _not _lying.

"Yes, you are. Belle, you can't do this. You can't say that I did something to you that I really didn't. Look, I know you're trying to rationalize what happened between you and Holden, but you can't do it this way. Can I trust you?" Teddy questions, slowly taking his hand away from my mouth. "Don't scream."'

"Teddy, this is your fault. You kissed me first, and I didn't want you to. You took advantage of my emotions," I remind him. "If anything, you would have said I came on to _you_, if I were to tell Holden. You knew we were having problems. You _knew _he would have believed you over me."

"I never took advantage of you!" Teddy snaps. "Belle, I asked you if this was what you wanted _multiple _times! And you said yes!"

"Don't you get it? I was sad, and lonely, and you made me think you loved me. I would have said anything! You can't possibly trust what I said, or take it as consent! You _lied_ to me! You're the reason Holden broke up with me!"

Teddy shakes his head. "Belle, _you're_ the reason Holden broke up with you! If you didn't want to sleep with me, you didn't have to!"

"This isn't just my fault! You told me everything would be all right!"

"And because it isn't, _I'm_ the reason for it?"

I purse my lips. "Teddy, I'm not going to argue with you. Just let me go home, I want to speak with my parents."

"What are you going to tell them?" Teddy questions cautiously. He's still standing over me.

"I'm going to tell them the truth, of course."

Teddy narrows his eyes. "_Your_ version of it?"

"There are no 'versions'. It's what happened, Teddy. Let me go home." I stand up, and Teddy takes a step back.

"Belle, I can't let you do that. Not until you promise me that you _know_ I didn't hurt you," Teddy says adamantly.

I try to step around him, but it doesn't work. "Teddy, you can't keep me here. I want to go home. You proved to me that I can't trust you. I'm upset," I tell him.

"I know. That's what I'm afraid of. But Belle, think about what will happen if everyone else finds out you're lying..."

"I'm _not!_ You know what you did!"

Teddy takes a deep breath and covers his mouth with his hand for a moment. "Holden broke up with you because you cheated on him. We were _both _wrong, Belle. But we both agreed to do this. Now we have to deal with the consequences." He says firmly. "Do you get that?"

I feel my eyes welling up with tears again. I'm in an absolute state of grief. "H-he's gone f-forever isn't he?" My voice comes out in a set of quiet hiccups.

Teddy has a grave look on his face. "I don't know, Belle. Maybe."

I can't even handle that thought. The next thing I know, my vision goes spotty, I'm light-headed, and I feel my knees buckle. Teddy puts an arm around me to support me before I completely collapse. "You should sit." Teddy gently guides me back into the chair.

"I-I didn't m-mean it, Teddy!" I sob, trying to calm my breathing down. Nothing is working.

"What didn't you mean?"

"I didn't w-want him t-to leave _f-forever!_" I wail. "I can't b-be without h-him! You have to t-tell him I made a m-mistake!"

Teddy gives me a glass of water. My hands are shaking so badly that I spill most of it. "I think we should both give Holden some time," Teddy advises. "Don't you think so?"

I don't know what I think. The longer I stay away from Holden, the more separated we will become. I take a slow sip of water. It's coolness makes my throat hurt. I'm sure it's all the crying, too.

"I-I'm sorry," I apologize to Teddy. He doesn't say anything back, but he looks completely exasperated. I'm sure he hates me now. I just want to go home.

* * *

When I got home, I went to my room and cried myself to sleep. No one in my family bothered me for the rest of the day, not even Mum. I suppose they figured quite easily that I was upset.

Since I haven't seen my family for two days, I decided to come out for breakfast. On days like this, when the weather is nice, my family has breakfast outside. It was one of Mum's ideas.

"Good morning, Isobelle," Mum says, offering me a small smile as I take my seat. I can't bring myself to return it. I know I must look an absolute fright. I haven't taken much care to my appearance. For the first time in a long while, my hair hangs loose around my shoulders. "Would you like some tea?"

"Okay," I mutter, accepting the teacup from Mum. She gives me a concerned look, but doesn't say anything more.

Hugo taps me on the shoulder. "D'you want any strawberries, Belle? I know they're your favorites," Hugo offers, nudging the dish in my direction.

I feel terrible for refusing, but I'm really not in the mood for breakfast right now. "No... thank you, though, Hugo."

"It's okay."

Nina gives me a look of confusion. Her fingers are covered in syrup and Dad is watching her closely, making certain she doesn't touch the table-cloth. "Are you really sad, Belly?" She asks. "You look like you cried a lot."

"Don't ask her that!" Rose hisses, shushing Nina. Nina sticks her tongue out at Rose.

"Girls," Dad chastises, giving both Nina and Rose disapproving looks. Mum rolls her eyes good-naturedly. I'm glad to see my family happy and getting along for the most part, but I'm completely miserable.

"What happened to your face?" Scorpius asks me suddenly. Simultaneously, five other sets of eyes turn to regard me.

I frown. "What do you mean?"

"You've got a few bruises kind of near your chin. You didn't know?" Scorpius asks me. I haven't looked in the mirror this morning. I feel my face pale. I wasn't even aware Holden grabbed me hard enough to leave a bruise. I hope there isn't one on my arm as well.

"No," I answer quietly.

Dad gives me a hard look. "Where did they come from?" He asks, his tone accusing. It sometimes angers me that he always assumes the worst.

I know immediately that I can't tell him the truth. He'll be upset. "I...er... hit myself with my... hand mirror," I stutter.

Dad looks skeptical. "Hard enough to leave bruises? Did you hit yourself more than once?"

"I suppose, I don't really know. It was an accident."

"I don't believe you," Dad says bluntly. Mum gives him an apprehensive glance. "Where were you the other day?"

"Teddy's," I answer plainly.

Mum furrows her eyebrows. "Harry told me yesterday that Holden and Teddy were together. Were you there, too?" Mum asks. Right after she asks her question, realization dawns on her face. "Oh, Isobelle."

"Mum," I say quietly, urging her not to tell Dad anything. Rose gives me a sympathetic look.

"What is going on?" Dad demands. "Did one of them-"

"Nothing," I answer hurriedly. "I did this to myself. I _told _you. I'm not lying!"

"Hermione," Dad says stiffly, his jaw clenched. "Do you know anything about this?"

Mum shakes her head. "If Isobelle says that she isn't lying, she isn't," she responds. Even though Mum just lied for me, I can tell that she's deeply disappointed in me.

"What reason would Teddy have to put his hands on you?" Dad questions. I can tell it's taking all his self-control to remain calm.

"He _didn't!_"

"And Holden?"

"Because I- I mean..." My voice trails off, instantly realizing that I just told on myself.

Dad slams his fist on the table and it makes Mum and I jump. Hugo and Nina seem confused. Scorpius remains silent, and Rose looks at me as if I somehow deserved this. "I'm going to kick his ass!" He shouts.

"You won't do anything of the sort!" Mum says instantly, putting a calming hand on Dad's shoulder. Dad brushes her arm off and stands abruptly.

"Oh, I _won't?_ Hermione, that son of a bitch has _no_ business hitting our daughter!"

"He didn't _hit _me!" I cry.

"Hugo, take your sister inside, please," Mum asks calmly. Hugo gets up and quietly ushers Nina towards the back door.

"Is Belly in trouble?" Nina asks. Hugo doesn't answer.

"Then what _did_ he do? Tell me this instant!" Dad commands, his eyes boring into mine. I can't remember the last time I saw him this angry.

"It was...he- It doesn't matter! You don't know what _I _did, Dad!" I point out.

Mum puts her hand over her mouth and won't meet any of our eyes. Dad wrings his hands and paces as if he wants to hit something. I'm sure that 'something' is Holden's face.

"I don't give a _damn _what you did, Isobelle! I don't even care if you hit him first!" Dad yells. "That doesn't give him the right to lay a finger on you! There is nothing you can say or do to justify that sort of behavior!"

"I cheated on him!" I confess. Dad stops pacing. Rose and Scorpius look at each other, and then at me. "I cheated on Holden, and he found out! He broke up with me! Are you happy, now? Holden and I aren't together anymore! You win!"

Dad turns to face me, and I fear that I've angered him as well. "This isn't _about _winning, Isobelle. And you should be _happy_ he left you. I told you from the _beginning_ that this relationship wouldn't amount to anything! I'm glad it's over and done with!"

I look down again. Dad narrows his eyes. "Isobelle, you'd better tell me you're done with this boy!"

"I can't," I whisper. "I still love him..."

"Rose and I are going to go inside," Scorpius says uncomfortably, sensing the tension. Mum nods them farewell.

After the back door closes, Dad keeps his fit going. "You _what?_" he demands, his eyes flashing angrily. "I hope you aren't serious!"

"I can't just stop loving Holden in an instant! It isn't that easy!" I tell Dad. "Mum, _tell_ him!" I know Mum understands how I feel. She's told me that she does. It was a long while before she was over Ron, too.

Mum sighs. "Isobelle, I'm sorry-"

"_Mum_!" I protest. "You _have_ to understand!"

"There isn't anything _to _understand. Your father's right. It's time you and Holden called it quits," Mum agrees. "This isn't the first time the two of you have had a problem like this. Now, I don't doubt that Holden can be a very nice young man-"

"You should have _every_ doubt about that!" Dad interjects. "Isobelle, you aren't to speak to him anymore and that is _final!_ Do you understand me?" I'd have a hard enough time just trying to get Holden to speak back to me. He said he wanted nothing to do with me anymore, but he can't really mean that, can he?

"I don't need your permission to speak to Holden!" I remind Dad. "I'm adult!"

Dad clenches his fists. "That may be, but you are still living under my roof, therefore you follow _my _rules!"

"That isn't fair!" I complain. "It's none of your business whether or not I speak to him! He _knows _what he did wasn't right-"

"Do _you_ know that?" Dad interrupts me. Of course, I know.

"Yes, I know that. And I told him. But now that I've given it more thought, what if everyone separated whenever they had a fight? No one would be together anymore!" I point out. "You and Mum certainly wouldn't."

Mum gives me a sideways glance, but remains silent.

"Then again, I've never hit your mother, Isobelle. I wouldn't want you to consider that a contributing factor or anything."

"Draco," Mum chides, giving him a meaningful look. Dad doesn't respond. Instead, he regards me one last time before going inside.

"Isobelle-" Mum starts.

"Don't," I say. "You should have defended me. Why didn't you?"

"You know why."

"But, you and Ron-"

"Has nothing to do with you and Holden," Mum assures me. She stands up. "I don't want you seeing him either, but I know by now you that you'll do what you want. I just hope you make the right choice." Like Dad, Mum goes inside.

I put my head in my hands. I thought Mum would at least be more sensible and see my point of view. Apparently, that wasn't the case. And Dad's just happy for another reason to hate Holden.

I feel a slight tugging on the sleeve of my robes. Slowly looking up, I see Nina's round blue eyes, peering at me with concern. When she glances over her shoulder, I know that she isn't supposed to be out here.

"Belly, don't cry," Nina says quietly, climbing onto my lap.

"I'm sorry," I apologize, "but I'm a bit upset right now.

"'Cause of Mummy and Daddy?" Nina questions, putting her arms around my shoulders.

I nod. "Sort of."

"Why?"

"You wouldn't understand."

A troubled expression crosses Nina's face, then she looks at me again."'Kay, but why is Mummy sad?" she asks.

I can't help but frown. "What do you mean?"

"I heard Mummy crying last night," Nina informs me. "But I dunno why." She gives me an expectant look.

"I don't know why, either," I admit. "You didn't ask her?"

Nina shakes her head. "Daddy told me to go to bed. Nobody tucked me in," she says sadly.

"I'm sorry to hear that," I apologize quietly. I just don't want Nina's to be as confusing as Rose, Hugo's or Scorpius'. I definitely don't want it to be anywhere near mine, either.

"It's okay. Do you wanna play with me?"

I consider it for a moment. I don't particularly enjoy any of the games Nina likes to play, but she does deserve for someone to entertain her. Hopefully, it will take my mind off things as well.

"Sure," I agree.

* * *

**(A/N: I hope you liked this chapter! For once, I don't really have much to say, other than thanks for reading and leave a review!)**


	18. Can't See the Other in My Life

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

***Sorry I haven't updated in forever, it was for personal reasons, and I'll leave it at that.**

***Title comes from 'Lover's Eyes' by Mumford and Sons!***

*******_**Please **_**leave a review, I didn't get many last chapter!**

* * *

My house-elf bows before me. "Young Mistress, you have a guest."

Frowning, I close my book and get up to see who my 'guest' is. I exit the library and walk into the foyer, and I'm not pleased in the slightest.

"What are you doing here?" I ask darkly, staring Teddy in the face. "I don't want to see you!"

"I came to apologize," he tells me cautiously, as if he's just realized that this might be a mistake. "I'm sorry."

"You've apologized, and now you can go," I say harshly, pointing to the door. The idea of an apology was much better than the actual thing.

Teddy gives me a confused look. "Let me get one thing straight first. You plan to beg and plead for Holden to take you back, but you won't even accept my apology? Seems a bit hypocritical doesn't it?"

"No, Teddy. Hypocritical is encouraging me to work out my problem with Holden while you're ignoring your _own_ girlfriend! Or have you forgotten about Victoire completely?"

Teddy shakes his head exasperatedly.

"Why are you even apologizing to me? Do you have a heavy conscience?" I ask.

"I thought you wanted me to apologize because we were caught," Teddy mutters acerbically.

I don't understand why Teddy thinks I'm in the mood for his sarcasm. "You don't understand how serious this _is, _do you?" I ask. I don't even give Teddy time to answer. "Of _course _you don't! You don't have to suffer the consequences of your choices!"

"What are you talking about?"

"You've kept Victoire in the dark about the entire thing, so you can go back to her like nothing ever happened. And it's not like you have to deal with Holden anymore, considering you've probably ruined your friendship with him for good! It isn't as if you cared about him that much anyway!"

"And you do?" Teddy questions.

I stomp forward until I'm jabbing my finger into his chest. "How _dare _you ask me that question! You know how much I love Holden! And it wasn't _me _who forgot I had plans with him in the first place! If it weren't for you, this would have all been water under the bridge and he wouldn't have ever found out!"

"Go ahead and blame everything on everyone else like you always do," Teddy mutters.

"As if you didn't have a part in this!" I hiss. "Hell, _all_ of it was your idea!"

"You never objected," Teddy points out. "Well, I mean unless you count that moment where you totally lost it and almost got me arrested."

"I'm sure I wouldn't have regretted it," I say through clenched teeth.

"Whatever gets you back with Holden, right?" Teddy questions.

I'm absolutely enraged by Teddy's comment. Before I can form a second thought, I draw my hand back, prepared to slap him square across the face. Teddy reaches forward and his hand closes loosely around my wrist to stop me.

"_I'm _the bad guy?" Teddy asks, slowly letting my wrist go.

"Why would you say that to me?" I demand. I can barely stand to look at Teddy right now.

"Being with Holden's made you think it's okay to hit people?" Teddy looks me dead in the eye.

"Holden didn't-"

"Save it, Belle. I know you didn't give yourself that bruise on your chin," Teddy gives me a knowing look. "_That's _what you want to go back to?"

"Oh, please, don't make Holden out to be such a monster! You wouldn't have been his friend if he was!" I remind Teddy. It frustrates me how Teddy always has to be the most perfect one. He acts like he knows everything, and he has all the answers when he really doesn't.

"I'm not making Holden out to be anything. But go on and defend him. I'm _sure_ he would do the same for you."

I narrow my eyes at Teddy. "You can't stand the fact that I'd rather have Holden, can you?"

Teddy opens his mouth to say something, then shakes his head. "I honestly don't care. Whatever choice you make is up to you. You're the one who has to live with it, not me."

"You've made that clear, haven't you?"

I turn when I hear someone coming downstairs. "Isobelle, are you speaking to some- oh, hello, Teddy," Mum says uncomfortably.

"Hey, Aunt Hermione."

Mum looks between Teddy and I. "Isobelle, you didn't tell me Teddy was going to be over."

"Teddy didn't tell me, _either_." I back away and start up the stairs. "I'm going to my room, I'm tired." I'm not really tired, I just want an excuse to get away from Teddy.

* * *

I look into the mirror for the first time in a couple days. Teddy and Scorpius were correct. I do have a bruise on my chin. It's sort of faded now, but still visible on my pale skin.

Looking at myself, I don't know what to think. How could someone who loved me do this to me? Even so, how I could I push someone I love to the point of wanting to hurt me? Of course, I blame everyone else for my problems, Teddy was right. I wish I could just learn how to take responsibility.

Slowly, I roll up my left sleeve. The bruise on my upper arm makes me cringe. It's even worse than the one on my face. How could I ever make Holden so angry? No wonder he hates me. I hate myself for what I did, too.

I want nothing more than to see Holden. I just want to speak to him, to apologize and to tell him that I love him very much, and I was stupid to ever think otherwise. Teddy was a mistake, and nothing more. Perhaps this was the wake-up call I needed to realize that I need to be a better girlfriend to Holden. If I tell him how stupid, and selfish, and irritating I know I can be, I know that he'll want me back. How could he not?

Someone knocks on my door. "Come in, please."

When I see that it's Mum, I roll down my sleeve immediately. She has a rather blank look on her face, and I can tell that she's got a lot on her mind, whatever she's thinking about. I wonder if it's what Nina was talking about.

"Good morning," Mum says absent-mindedly. I move to sit on the edge of my bed.

"Same to you," I mutter back. "Is Teddy gone?"

Mum nods. "Yes, he seemed rather apologetic," she tells me. I roll my eyes inwardly. It's probably just an act of his.

"He isn't really."

Mum and I are both silent for a while. "Isobelle, I'm sorry about Holden," Mum apologizes finally.

"Why should _you_ be sorry?" I question lamely. "Teddy and I were the reason for it all."

Mum shakes her head. "I'm not saying what the you did wasn't wrong, but it takes two people to break up a relationship like that," Mum tells me.

I know she's trying her best to make me feel better, but this is my fault. Mum's only denying it because she knows I'm upset.

"Perhaps I should have married Holden. I'm sure we wouldn't have ever begun arguing, and- and I could have given him a son with dark hair and beautiful blue eyes. We would have been so happy," I say longingly. Now, I'm not sure if that can ever happen.

Mum furrows her eyebrows. "You said you weren't ready for any of those things," she reminds me.

"Holden was, and it was my job to make him happy. You know how miserably I failed at that."

"Well, I don't think it's doing you any good to dwell on it."

I look in the direction of the window instead of at Mum. Why doesn't she understand? "How can I move on from Holden just like that? You couldn't _ever _understand how much I love him," I assure Mum. I didn't want to be married before, and I don't think I do now, but I would do it if it means that Holden will stay with me.

"You seem a bit conflicted yourself. Sometimes, you tell me you don't like how he treats you, other times you accept it. Isobelle, you need to make up your mind," Mum tells me.

I turn to face her. "Of course, I had so many opinions. You would, too if you were allowed! But now that Holden and I may be done for certain, I know that I want him back."

Mum nods solemnly. "I suppose, but Isobelle, I can't help but feel as if you're ignoring your own feelings."

I'm sure Mum's correct. "Paying attention to my feelings is what got me into this mess in the first place. I mean, look at me."

"Mum gestures to my face. "You can't honestly believe that was only your fault."

"How can't I? Do you know what Holden said to me? He said he would have _never_ cheated on me. But I couldn't even give him the same sort of respect. How would I deserve him to be kind to me?" I ask.

"You say Holden cares for you, but if he really did, he wouldn't have done half the things he did to you, Mum tells me.

I put my head in my hands. "I _hate _myself so much for what I did. I wish I could take it all back, but I can't, and I _hate _that. I've ruined everything. I think part of the reason I'm so mad at Teddy is because I know it was just as much my fault."

"And moping around everywhere helps you to feel better?" Mum guesses.

That isn't it. I wish she could be serious. "You know _exactly _how I feel, yet you can't give me the benefit of the doubt. Why not?"

"Because I don't want you beating yourself up like I did. Guilt does a terrible thing to you," Mum answers. I know she means well,but she needs to let me get over this at my own pace.

* * *

Rose bumps into me on the way downstairs. "I wouldn't do that if I were you," she informs me. She has a book in one hand and the other hand is full of sweets.

I stop. "Why not?"

"Mum and Dad are fighting again. It's like a nuclear war-zone in the living room." Rose gestures her hand over the balcony. She's right. Even from all the way upstairs, I can hear Mum and Dad shouting at each other. I sigh. Some things never change.

"What are they fighting about?" I ask.

Rose shrugs. "Scorpius, I think."

"What did he do this time?"

"Nothing I know of," Rose shrugs. "At least Dad isn't mad at you anymore."

I rub my chin subconsciously, then wince. "I wouldn't be so sure."

Rose puts her hand on my shoulder comfortingly. "Don't worry, Belle. Holden's a jerk for treating you like that. You're better without him."

I don't say anything back to Rose. I'm not in the mood to discuss Holden right now, especially with a twelve-year-old.

"Whatever they're arguing about, it's been going on for a couple days now," Rose informs me. "I wish I knew."

Rose looks at me and raises her eyebrows.

When I realize what she wants, I shake my head. "_No._ I absolutely won't."

"Oh, come on. They'll talk about anything in front of you! Or you could just listen in on them," Rose suggests.

"If you want to know so badly, then why don't you do it?"

Rose rolls her eyes. "Because I'll get into trouble if I do. Seriously, Belle, you can't say that you aren't as curious as I am."

Rose does have a point. I really would like to know what Mum and Dad are arguing about. Maybe it's for the same reason that Nina said Mum was crying.

I exhale. "Fine, whatever," I relent. Rose's face lights up.

"Belle, have I ever told you how much I love you?"

"Not recently," I mutter, continuing down the stairs. I look up at Rose again. She shoos her hand at me, an eager expression on her face. I really need to stop doing what Rose tells me.

I go down the long hallway until Mum and Dad's voices are clear enough for me to hear.

"Draco, I swear if you do this, I'll _never_ forgive you!" Mum says fiercely.

"At this point, I honestly don't care whether you do or not! This isn't about you! It's about _Scorpius!_" Dad argues back.

"Scorpius is just a boy! Do you honestly think you're doing him any kind of favors, planning out his entire life for him?" Mum questions.

"I _am,_ Hermione! Excuse me for trying to give my son a chance!"

"Scorpius is _my _son, too! Sometimes, Draco, I think you forget that!" Mum shouts. I pray that Dad doesn't get into technicalities.

I hear Dad sigh. "Hermione, I'm Scorpius' father. I know what's best for him. In this case, the marriage would be good for him. He's even agreed to it, and I'm sure that doesn't happen often." Marriage? Scorpius hasn't even hit puberty yet.

"You're completely overlooking the fact that Scorpius is _twelve_! What if he changes his mind about Daisy by the time he's old enough to marry her? What then?" Mum asks. They must be arguing about Scorpius and Daisy being married one day. Still, I wouldn't see that as something for Mum to cry over.

"It isn't like that's going to happen. They've known each other since before they could walk. This would be great for Scorpius, Hermione. He'd have a respectable wife, we're already friends with the Zabinis, and their children would be-"

"Would be pureblood? Is that what you're worried about, Draco?" Mum demands.

"It _is_, Hermione. Don't you understand? I'm not doing this for any thoughts of superiority, I'm doing this so that Scorpius can actually _belong_ somewhere!"

I understand Dad completely. I just wish Mum wouldn't be so stubborn about it. "And this is the only way to do it? This isnt fair."

"Hermione, raising Scorpius as a pureblood, then having him not fit into that lifestyle would be unfair!"

"Does rasing Scorpius as a pureblood mean not letting him enjoy anything? You're going to take his life away from his before he has a chance to live it! You make him so concerned with pleasing us that he's afraid to make any sort of mistakes! He's changed Draco, he's...he's turning into _you_!" Mum realizes.

It was such a mistake for her to say that. I know that will make Dad angry.

"What a surprise, Hermione, that _my son_ is anything like me! Hopefully, his marriage will _last_, and he won't have to be on his _third _engagement!"

I hope Dad doesn't mean what I think he does. "Are you implying something, Draco?" Mum asks, dangerously quiet. "What'_third_ engagement'?"

Dad makes a groaning sound. "Don't be so extreme, I wasn't referring to anyone after you. I was promised to Pansy before- well, before Isobelle happened," Dad tells Mum. I know my existence is a mistake, but knowing he was to be married to Pansy, I'm sure Dad's glad I happened.

"I should have known, the way you two were always so _close_ to each other," Mum mutters in a suggestive tone.

"Oh, please. We both know that Pansy is an idiot, and that relationship had no emotion behind it whatsoever. Besides, I was much younger than Scorpius when I was told about my marriage. "

"How old were you?" Mum questions.

"About eight or nine. And I thought nothing of it, because it was what was expected of me, just the same as Scorpius," Dad answers. He's right. Pretty much his entire life, Scorpius has allowed Dad to mold him perfectly. He's rarely ever complained.

"I don't believe this," Mum says in a defeated tone. "Scorpius is a human being, not your pawn! He should be able to make his own choices, not follow a path you've laid out for him!"

"Scorpius agreed to this and, Hermione, I honestly don't need any more of your input, not that I ever asked for it in the first place! At least I'm concerned about being a father! Weasley not wanting to see his children has _nothing _to do with me!" Dad shouts.

Not wanting to see his children? What kind of parent just refuses completely to see their child? Well, there's Mum... but she at least had some sort of a reason.

"According to him it does, Draco. Apparently he'd rather not be involved with Rose and Hugo now that I've married you. That isn't fair to them at all."

It takes me all of a second to realize this was why Mum was crying. Anything to do with Ron and her children makes Mum completely sad and emotional. I just wish she would forget about him for good.

"This is the last thing you want to hear, but if that's how Weasley feels, then it's probably better that he _isn't_ in Rose or Hugo's lives," Dad reasons. I know Mum won't be willing to accept that possibility so easily. She's extremely stubborn and dead-set on Ron somewhat being in her childrens' lives.

"Draco, they at least deserve the opportunity to know their father- their _biological _father," Mum adds matter-of-factly.

"If Weasley doesn't want to see his children- if he'd rather forget that he _has_ any children- what would make you think he would be kind to Rose or Hugo, given the chance to meet them?"

"Draco, I know how you feel about Ron, but will you put that aside a moment-"

"I'm not that immature. Feelings discarded, it's a horrible idea. Things are going fine without Weasley, I don't see why you would want to upset that." Hopefully Dad can talk some sense into Mum.

"Things were going fine without Astoria, too," Mum counters, and edge to her voice.

"Are you seriously going to play that card?" Dad demands.

"And now, you're even crazier about Scorpius than you _ever _were! Are you forgetting that you have three other children _and _Isobelle?" I don't particularly like the way Mum says 'and Isobelle'.

"Of course not, Hermione. And what _about _Isobelle?" Dad questions.

"You keep talking about Scorpius being married, when you have a child that's around the actual age for it! This is what you always do between the two of them!"

"Please tell me, _what _do I always do?" Dad questions. I know exactly what Mum's talking about.

"You're raising Scorpius like _he's _the oldest, and not Isobelle! How do you think she feels knowing that Scorpius is more likely to be married than she will? You've already stressed the fact to her that aside from her inheritance, she won't get a _thing _from you!" Mum reminds dad heatedly.

I've gotten to the point where it doesn't really bother me anymore. Ever since we found out Scorpius was going to be a boy, Dad has been preparing me for this. I always knew that whether I was married or not, Scorpius would be. And whenever he does marry, he gets Malfoy Manor and everything that comes with it. Even when Dad dies, Scorpius will get everything from him and I nothing. Even if Scorpius and I had the same parents, things would still be that way because I was born a girl. The only way I could possibly inherit the Manor is if Scorpius dies before he has a child. To me, it just isn't worth it.

"To be completely honest, Hermione, I'm certain Scorpius would much rather be in Isobelle's place! I know I would have! At least she can _choose _who she wants to marry, and she doesn't have any expectations of her!" Dad argues.

I know from his standpoint, it must seem amazing to be that way. In reality, I'd want nothing more than to actually belong amongst one of my parents' backgrounds. I'm still not comfortable enough around muggle things to fit in with Mum, yet my blood isn't 'pure' enough to live the life I've been raised to have. Honestly, I'd much rather be muggle-born than a half-blood. It's better to be at one end of the spectrum than in the middle.

"Do you not think it hurts Isobelle to see you give Scorpius so many opportunities and her so little?" Mum questions.

"If that's your argument, then what about Hugo, Rose, or Nina?" Dad reminds Mum.

"They're Scorpius' step-siblings! They know the difference! And Nina is _six. _None of them were really brought up with Scorpius like Isobelle was! What are you so bent on, anyway?"

"You don't understand," Dad says finally.

"I don't understand what, Draco?" Mum's voice is softer.

"You don't understand how much I've managed to ruin for this- the Malfoy- family in a single generation, and it's my job to fix it. The only way I'm able to do that is through Scorpius. You may not like it, but it's what has to be done. I honestly believe that Scorpius has the potential to be a much better man than I ever could be, and I want his upbringing to reflect that," Dad explains.

"What reason would you have to believe that it hasn't?" Mum asks.

"The last time Astoria came over, she told me that she doesn't believe Scorpius is being raised the way he should be," Dad informs Mum. I don't understand why anything Astoria says would ever bother Dad. It hasn't for seven years.

Mum doesn't say anything for a long while. "Why would you listen to a word she says?"

"Believe me, I know that Astoria is a terrible, self-centered human being. That's why I'm sure that if she ever felt Scorpius would be a bad reflection upon her, she would say so," Dad reasons. He does have a pretty good point. Whether she raised him or not, Astoria would like nothing more than to present a 'perfect, pureblooded son' to the world. A son she never even wanted.

Mum sighs. "Draco, you know how I feel about this..."

"I know, Hermione. But this really is for the better. You'll see," Dad assures her.

Mum and Dad don't say anything more after that, and I suppose they've resolved the whole thing.

What am I supposed to tell Rose? That Scorpius has an arranged marriage and Mum thinks Dad's putting Scorpius above the rest of us? I don't think she would be interested in any of that.

But I couldn't possibly mention to her that her own father wants _nothing _to do with her or Hugo. That would absolutely crush her.

* * *

**(A/N: So, yeah, Belle wants Holden back. Honestly, it's not like she would have thought she could made it long without him. That's what happens in those sort of relationships. And yeah, Ron's a bit of a loser (in this story, at least). But in this situation, I'm sure this is how he's act, like that little kid pouting in the corner. Sorry again I kept you all waiting! Thanks for reading! Leave a review!)**


	19. If You Dare Come a Little Closer

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

***Hope you guys like this chap! Leave a review :) Happy St. Patty's Day!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Stay' by Rihanna and Mikky Ekko. That songs sort of reminds me of Belle!**

* * *

I'm about to step onto the lift at the Ministry when someone catches my eye. I turn around slowly, hoping it is who I think. Simon can wait.

I begin to walk faster, partly elbowing my way through the crowd, muttering apologies of 'Excuse me, pardon me, and I'm sorry'. If I wouldn't look like a total idiot, I would have taken off running.

"Holden! _Holden!_" I call, reaching forward to take his arm. Holden's shoulders go stiff and he turns around slowly. He doesn't look at all too pleased to see me.

"What, are you following me now? Get away from me," Holden says, staring down at me with a disgusted look. I barely pay it any attention.

"Are you here to visit your father? I remember you used to do that sometimes-"

"I _said_ to get away from me." Holden's jaw clenches.

I knew he would be angry with me still, but I expected him to calm down a bit. In fact, he seems even _angrier. _

"Can't we talk a moment? I need to talk to you," I plead.

"I don't care," Holden snaps. He looks away in disinterest. Other people are going by, and some are starting to look on. I would hate for either of my parents, especially Dad, to see me speaking to Holden.

"Please, just come over here," I gently lead Holden to a more secluded part of the Atrium. I take a deep breath. "I was wrong for doing what I did to you, I know that. And I was being stupid, and selfish, and _everything _you said I was. You just don't understand Holden, how much I loved you, and how much it broke my heart to think that you didn't feel the same. But you were right, no one on this planet loves me better than you do."

Holden looks skeptical. He shakes my hand off his arm. "Not even Teddy?" he questions, his voice biting.

I shake my head vigorously. "Of course, not. You were right about him. Teddy is a terrible liar, and you have to believe that _he _started this, not me. Everything you said about him is true. If I hadn't been so stupid-"

"You probably can't help it by now," Holden interjects, crossing his arms.

I ignore Holden. "I changed my mind. I don't want us to be broken up, and you can't seriously want that either. Do you really want to give up seven years?" I ask, searching for some sort of forgiveness in Holden's face. I don't find it.

"_You _ended the relationship, not me. I wasn't the one who cheated. I was open with you, and you went behind my back. And then you blamed it on me." Holden reminds me.

Everything he says is true, and it makes me feel immensely guilty.

"I know, and I'm sorry."

"What the hell is saying 'sorry' going to fix? You just don't understand how much you messed up, do you?" Holden demands. I can tell by his body language that he wants to yell at me, or do something to really get his message through to me. He can't, though, because he's in public.

"I _do, _understand Holden, and I regret every last bit of it! But, all those times you told me you loved me, you can't just stop in an instant, can you?" I ask.

Holden doesn't answer, and that scares me.

"I've been doing some thinking, and all those times you were hurtful to me, or you belittled me, I overlooked that because I _loved _you. People who _love _each other can overlook some of those things," I tell Holden. "Like last week when you- you _grabbed_ me. I did at first, but now I don't care about the bruises. Because those go away. But if _you _leave me, I'll never forget that."

Holden shakes his head slowly. "You overlooked it because you realized how much of your shit I deal with," He informs me.

"Because you love me," I add quickly. "Right? Holden, please say-"

"You don't even realize how pathetic you're being right now, do you?" Holden asks, looking at me with genuine interest for the first time. "When I said we were over, I meant it."

"You can't have," I whisper weakly, my lower lip trembling.

I frown slightly, looking at Holden. I may be wrong, but it feels as if he enjoys making me feel terrible about myself. Why is he acting like this?

"You have no idea how much I regret this," I say again.

Holden shrugs. "I could say the same."

"I changed my mind about marrying you."

Holden raises his eyebrows. "Well, it's too late for that, isn't it? Y'know, I am rather glad that you said no. It's the only smart decision you've made so far."

I'm trying to think of something to say when someone behind me clears their throat. I can tell it's a man.

"Is there a problem, Miss Malfoy?" Simon steps forward and makes no point to hide the look of disgust he's giving Holden. "You seem to be having a bit of trouble making it to my office."

"I was on my way," I say quickly, directing my attention back to Holden.

Holden cuts a glance at Simon, then narrows his eyes at me. I almost forgot they hated each other. "Really, Belle? That's low, even for you."

What is he talking about? Of course, I never told Holden about my 'working for' Simon. It was Teddy I told.

"Simon and I... we aren't..." I stammer. "It's not what you think!"

An amused look crosses Simon's face. "I must say, McKinnon, you seemed nervous for a moment." Simon turns to me. "The two of you don't seem to be the loving couple you were made out to be." It's sad that he's correct.

Holden gives me a scathing glance. He probably thinks that I told Simon about us. "Holden, I never said anything-"

"Save it," Holden cuts me off. "Do whatever you want, I don't give a damn."

Simons makes a 'tsk'ing noise and shakes his head. "Now, now, that isn't how we speak to women," he chides in a condescending tone.

It's taking a lot for Holden not to explode. He's looking between Simon and I like he can't decide which of us he wants to hit the most. "This doesn't concern you, Simon." His voice is clipped.

"Considering the fact that Miss Malfoy was supposed to be in my office five minutes ago, this _does _concern me. As of now, she's on _my_ time. Later on this afternoon, you can resume your little beratement party. However, until then, you'll have to put it on hold," Simon informs Holden, stepping in front of me.

I can't tell whether or not Simon is defending me, or he's just looking for an excuse to put Holden down. I'm not too comfortable with either. I don't know what reason Simon would have for defending me, considering he's always been just as rude.

Holden doesn't say anything. He turns and walks off. "Holden!" I shout after him. "_Hol_-"

Simon puts his hand out to stop me. "Desperation isn't at all attractive."

"I'm not trying to be attractive," I snap.

"All the better," Simon replies. I'm not sure what he means. "Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to go back to my office."

"Fine," I mutter, following Simon like a small child. He turns to look back at me a few times, but says nothing.

Once we're in his office and Simon shuts his door, I turn to face him. "Why did you do that?" I demand.

"Do what?" Simon questions, playing stupid.

"Approach Holden and I. Couldn't you have just waited?"

Simon shakes his head. "Miss Malfoy, I expected you in my office at noon. You weren't there, what was I to do?" He asks simply, idly tidying the papers on his desk.

"I don't need you to come hunting me down. I can handle myself," I inform Simon.

"You didn't prove that so well, the way you let McKinnon speak to you," Simon counters.

I'm tired of people using Holden's words against me. "You've been more rude to me than he ever was," I point out.

"I'm also not in a relationship with you."

"Which is perfect reason for you to stay out of this. Why do you even care?" I ask, putting my hands on my hips.

Simon glances at his papers again, then at the filing cabinet. He looks anywhere but at me. "You remind me of someone is all," he says nonchalantly.

"Who?"

Simon's eyes meet mine again. They're blue, but a different blue than Holden's. "My first wife."

I smirk at Simon. He must be joking. "You aren't much older than me. You can't have been married and separated already."

Simon folds his hands on his desk. The harsh look he gives me tells me he's completely serious. "I don't understand what you find amusing."

"I'm sorry, I didn't think you were serious. Why did your marriage end?"

Simon gestures to the chair in front of his desk. This is the first time he's ever offered me to sit. I take him up on it.

"Honestly, I didn't love her at all," Simon admits. "And I'm sure she knew. I cheated on her multiple times, my side of the bed was always empty."

"You slept with all your interns," I say, remember Simon telling me so. "I think you have a problem with that."

"Please, there were only eleven," Simon informs me. _Only?_

"That's still a very high number. So you cheated on your wife because you didn't love her?" I ask.

Simon nods slowly. "Yes, and no. I figured if I pushed her away enough, she would get the message eventually. That wasn't the case."

"What happened?" I don't know why I'm so interested in Simon's story, or why he's even telling it.

"It seemed to only bring her closer to me. She begged and pleaded with me to love her back, and it was downright pitiful. I hated seeing it, and it made me dislike her more. It disgusted and bewildered me that she wished to be loved so badly by me when I cared absolutely nothing for her. If she didn't want better for herself, I didn't care to want better for her, either. The way you were pleading with McKinnon reminded me of her. Just don't ever do it," Simon tells me.

I don't know what to think. Does Simon really care what happens to me more than Holden? "Simon, what happened to your wife?"

Simon puts his hand to his chin. "I'm not positive. I was finally able to have one of my lawyer friends dissolve our marriage, and she left. I never heard from her again. Granted, I haven't really cared to."

"It was an arranged marriage, wasn't it?" I ask.

Simon nods solemnly. "Yes, and it was nearly impossible to obtain a separation. I was almost sure one of us would have to die to finally be out of that marriage."

When Simon says this, I think of Scorpius. What if they're friends now, but he grows up to dislike Daisy as much as Simon disliked his wife? What if he feels so trapped in his marriage that he purposely does things to hurt Daisy? I don't want Scorpius to end up like Simon, especially at such a young age.

"I'm sorry," I apologize. From the way he behaved, I assumed Simon was completely satisfied with his life. He sure acted like there was nothing better than being pureblooded.

"There's nothing that can be done about it. I've answered your question, now Miss Malfoy, I'd quite like you to answer mine."

"Okay."

"Now, we both know you aren't pureblood," Simon begins.

"And you love to seize any opportunity to remind me," I reply derisively.

Simon shakes his head. "I wasn't going there. I was going to ask, since you are in no way obligated to, why do you want so badly to be involved with McKinnon?" he questions.

I'm prepared to respond, but I don't think my usual 'because I love him' will sit well with Simon. "Comfort," I answer. "I've known Holden for so long, and I would like the think I know him better than to think he would give up on me."

"You believe you know him better than to think he could be rude to you?" Simon clarifies.

I nod.

"Did you ever believe I could be civil toward you?" Asks Simon.

"No. I never thought you were anything more than a blatant racist."

Simon tilts his head slightly. "I'm not a racist, Miss Malfoy. I simply understand how the world works. Some of us are expected to have certain beliefs, and we must uphold them. Besides, muggles and half-bloods are a different thing altogether."

"How do you think half-bloods ever came about? _Because _of muggles."

"I can respect _some_ magic blood better than I can respect none. My point is, you never truly know _anyone._ No matter how much you think you know someone, they always find a way to surprise you."

"They certainly do," I agree.

Simon and I make eye contact for a long moment. I can't understand his expression. It's as if he's studying me, but he's looking _into _me rather than _at _me.

"I've never looked at you closely before," Simon says.

"Oh."

"Your eyes are absolutely captivating. I can't help but say that you're a rather attractive woman," he tells me. "Do you believe so as well?"

I don't know how to answer. I look the way I look. "I suppose..."

Simon sets his quill in its inkwell. "You don't sound so sure."

"I'm not sure about many things," I admit.

I feel Simon's hand on top of mine. His fingers are cold. "Your cheeks are flushed, Miss Malfoy," Simon informs me, his voice low. "Is something the matter?"

"Shouldn't we be working?" I ask hesitantly.

Simon looks for a second like he doesn't remember why I'm actually supposed to be here. "We're busy at the moment. Let me ask you another question. Why did your relationship end?"

"We had slight differences," I say vaguely.

Simon isn't convinced. "Everyone has their differences. From the way McKinnon was behaving, you _did_ something," he reasons.

The way Simon looks at me, it feels like he's prying the answer out of my mouth. "I... I slept with someone else," I respond slowly. I don't dare mention Teddy's name.

Simon's smirk comes back to his face. "Well, I must say, that's a side of you I never expected. Do you see what I mean? People are surprising. You aren't like my ex-wife at all. She would have never thought to level the playing field."

I shake my head. "I didn't cheat on Holden to get back at him."

"No, you're too good for that sort of thing, aren't you?"

"I hope so," I say quietly.

Simon's eyes meet mine. "I don't believe you are." I really wasn't with Teddy to spite Holden. That was the last thing on my mind. Simon stands up and walks around his desk, tugging my hand slightly and urging me to stand as well.

"Do you know what I believe?" Simon questions, looking down at me.

"No..."

"_I_ believe that you really aren't as naive as you like to think you are. I know it from the way you've spoken to me. You're brilliant, Miss Malfoy, much more than I'm sure you're given credit for," Simon tells me.

Simon _is_ right. Everyone seems to feel the need to treat me like I'm stupid and can't make any decisions at all for myself. "You treated me like an idiot," I point out.

"I'd assumed if you were smart, your mother would have found a better job for you than an internship," Simon replies. "But then, I heard the way you spoke about your family, and I realized that you actually knew something about the world."

"I know enough to be aware of how unfair the world is. And not just for people like me and my mother. For _everyone_," I say. I don't think it's fair that people are classified by something that isn't even controllable, like blood. Something so petty can determine the course of your life.

Simon moves his hand to touch my face. Instinctively, I flinch. When I do it, I feel disgusted with myself almost. If Simon notices something, he ignores it.

"You and your mother have something in common," Simon tells me. Being so close to Simon gives me an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"Excuse me?"

"You both have a talent for charming pureblood wizards." It takes me a second to realize what Simon is saying.

"I'm sure it's completely unintentional."

Simon seems to be considering something. "May I kiss you, Miss Malfoy?"

I try to think enough to formulate an answer, but Simon's face is so near mine that I can't concentrate. Teddy and Holden never asked to kiss me, they just _did_. At the same time, though, I can't forget how uncomfortable Simon's made me feel before, and how he most likely has no sense of commitment whatsoever. _He's dangerous. _But he understands.

Simon curves his palm around my waist and pulls me closer to him. I can feel him watching me, reading the indecisiveness on my face. I feel like he can see everything I'm thinking and read my emotions as easily as a book.

I open my mouth to say something, but before I can get words out, Simon's lips crush against mine in a deep, suffocating kiss, leaving me no choice but to return it. The fresh pine smell of his cologne fills my nose, and smothers me almost. His hands slide forcefully across my body, ripping my robes away to allow him better access to my hips and making me feel exposed. When Simon's forceful hands don't quit roaming, I pull away. Simon's eyes open in shock.

"I'm sorry, I can't," I apologize, fixing my robes. I feel warmth rising to my cheeks again. "Not this soon."

Simon is absolutely bewildered. "What are you talking about? I've known you for-"

"A few weeks. And you've only been civil to me for about a half-hour. That's far too soon to do anything with you. I'm sorry," I say again.

"It isn't fair to tease me," Simon tells me, his tone begrudging.

"I'm not teasing you. I'm just trying to make better decisions. I don't want to have sex with you- not here, not this way," I tell Simon, hoping he won't be too angry.

"How could you possibly ask me to resist you after you kiss me like that?" Simon questions, running his hand through his hair.

"Like this. Please, Simon, I don't want another ruined relationship, and I'm sure you're tired of sleeping with random women as well. If you aren't, how can I expect you to treat me any differently?"

Simon seems to be contemplating it. "You confuse me," he says finally.

"How so?"

"It's quite obvious that you understand the makings of a relationship, yet you can't seem to apply them to yourself."

I know that Simon is talking about Holden.

"I'm trying to sort it all out," I inform Simon. "There was more to Holden and I than sex."

"Remind me, Miss Malfoy, how did that relationship end for you?" Simon questions, raising his eyebrows.

"Don't put that on me. I cheated on Holden. _I _had just as much to-"

"Come to lunch with me this afternoon," Simon offers.

My mouth hangs open. Did Simon just... "_What?"_

"Lunch, this afternoon. Come with me," Simon repeats. "Or have you lost all grasp of the English language?"

I blink a few times just to make sure this is still reality. "No, of course, not. _Absolutely_ not," I answer.

Simon seems offended. "A simple 'no' would have sufficed. But why not?"

"Holden and I just broke up. I can't go out with you. This is just too much. How about we do what we're supposed to be doing and get some work done?" I face my back to Simon, finding myself upset with him.

He takes hold of my hand. His fingers are gentle. "I don't have anything for you to do today."

"Then let me go home."

"You're still mine for the next two hours," Simon reminds me, his voice low.

"Well, you should think of something to do so I'm not sitting here twiddling my thumbs like a damn idiot."

"I can think of _plenty _of things." Simon presses his body against mine and place a kiss on my cheek, then the spot between my neck and collarbone. A shiver runs down my spine and I bite my lip.

I let my eyes close. "This wasn't...what I was...talking about."

"Miss Malfoy, when was the last time you cleared your head entirely, and just relaxed?" Simon questions, his lips grazing my ear.

"I... I don't remember," I answer honestly. Perhaps that's a bad thing, but I have many things to worry about. I don't have time to 'just relax'.

"It's no wonder you're so tense, then," Simon murmurs, his hands working my shoulders. I won't admit that it feels amazing. "You need some loosening up."

"Simon, please don't-"

"But I'm drawn to you now, Miss Malfoy," Simon tells me, his nose buried into my neck. "You're so very fascinating, I'd like to figure you out."

"You've implied that you've already got me figured out," I remind Simon.

"Yes, but not entirely. And I intend to do exactly that."

My muscles tense again as one of Simon's hands trails from my shoulder to my lower back. "Why?"

"Now it wouldn't be any fun if I told you, would it?"

"I'm not looking for fun."

"That may be your problem. Don't think," Simon whispers, walking slowly around me until we're chest to chest again.

"I can't help it," I reply.

Simons smirks at me. "I could fix that."

He leans in to kiss me again, but backs away as someone knocks on the door. Simon gestures for me to stay put as he opens the door.

"Mister Malfoy," he says loudly, in a professional voice. I look up in interest. I can't hear Dad well, but Simon's nodding like they're having a conversation. "Yes, of course you can have a word with her. Might I add that your daughter is quite a pleasure." I notice the suggestive undertone in Simon's voice and pray that Dad doesn't.

"Thank you, Simon," Dad responds.

Simon beckons me over to the door. The expression on Dad's face seems rather urgent. "What's wrong?" I ask cautiously.

"I need you home right now," Dad tells me, wasting no time at all.

A look of confusion crosses my face. "Why, what happened?"

Dad sighs. "Isobelle, can we not?"

I purse my lips and look at Simon. He nods his assent. "Fine, I'll be home in a moment. What about Mum?"

"She's at home already," Dad's tone suggests that's the issue.

I turn around dumbly to face Simon. I'm almost positive Dad knows nothing, but it's still rather uncomfortable for him to be here. "I apologize, there seems to be an emergency at home." I don't know why I tell Simon that, because I'm sure he just heard my entire conversation with Dad.

Simon shakes his head slightly. "It's no problem at all, Miss Malfoy. Good afternoon."

"Good afternoon," I reply, following Dad out. I wonder why he won't tell me what's happened.

* * *

**(A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! I'm sort of throwing around the idea of Belle/Simon in my head, I sort of like it. Any guesses as to what happened?**


	20. Love Was Made for the Light

***Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Slow It Down' by The Lumineers.**

***Thank you all for the overwhelmingly amazing amount of reviews from last chapter! It really does make me feel great to know that you enjoy my writing, and it encourages me to improve!***

* * *

As soon as I get home, I know things will end terribly. I can hear the defeated tone in Mum's voice. I glance over the balcony. She's arguing with... _Ron. _I nearly do a double-take. What can he be doing here?

"Dad, shouldn't you-"

"I promised Hermione I'd let her settle things on her own. Unless it gets out of hand, of course," Dad answers. If his expression is any indication, he's hoping for the chance to give Ron a piece of his mind.

"Well, then why did you make _me_ come home?" I question. Honestly, whenever this happened, I didn't want to be a part of it.

Dad doesn't answer. Instead, he averts his attention to Mum and Ron below us.

"I just want to know if it's true, Hermione. Yes or no?" Ron asks harshly.

Mum refuses to answer. "Why would you think so? What reason do you have to believe anything like that?"

"Oh, I have _plenty_!" Ron replies. "You've already proven to me that you have no qualms over hiding from me the fact that you have extra children! Do I need to remind you why I wanted a divorce in the first place?"

Mum shakes her head slowly."Isobelle didn't ruin our marriage, _you_ did! If you weren't so immature-"

Ron makes a face like that's the most ridiculous thing he's heard in his entire life."_I _was the immature one? Hermione, you were pregnant at _nineteen_! Not to mention you didn't even-"

Mum sighs and puts a hand to her temple. "This is getting off the point. What do you want? You've made it completely clear that you want nothing to do with Rose and Hugo, so why are you here?"

"You know _exactly _why," Ron says in a hinting tone. "This isn't about Hugo, or Rose, or Isobelle. You _know _who."

I know Ron's talking about Nina. I turn to look at Dad, but he doesn't move. His hands are gripped to the balcony and he's staring at Ron with enough hatred to burn holes in the side of his head.

"If Draco and I have another child, that's none of your concern," Mum responds stiffly, crossing her arms.

"But if you and I do, that _is _my concern," Ron counters.

"I don't care _what_ Astoria told you. It isn't as if you know her at all." _Astoria_? How couldn't I have guessed that she would have something to do with this? If it's possible, Dad looks even angrier.

"I don't care if I know her, Hermione! What reason would Malfoy's ex-wife have to come and tell me that I have another child with you? For her own health?" Ron demands.

"You should have asked her when she came to you," Mum retorts bitterly.

Ron narrows his eyes at Mum. "I want to see her," he resolves.

"Of course, not,"Mum answers immediately, taken aback that Ron would ever make such a request.

"Why not? If you don't have anything to hide?"

Mum scoffs. "Don't be silly, Ronald. I'm not going to bring her down here so she can go back upstairs and tell Rose and Hugo that you've come by without even asking to see them."

Ron takes a considerable step closer to Mum. Dad's shoulders tense.

"Dad, don't." I whisper, knowing that his temper's rising violently. I don't want him doing anything rash.

"Hermione, I swear I'll get the _muggle _police involved! What you did is illegal!" Ron threatens. I don't know what this means, but I know it's bad by the tone of Ron's voice.

"Honestly, Ron, police?" Mum questions in an exasperated tone.

"Yes, Hermione, because I'm sure they'll do a hell of a lot more about this than Aurors. Or have you forgotten about muggles altogether?"

"No, I haven't forgotten!"

Ron raises his eyebrows. You could have fooled me. All of _this_ isn't you, Hermione! Which is why I have no problem whatsoever-"

Dad takes off, charging down the stairs angrily. "Weasley, I swear to it all, if you threaten my wife one more time-"

"Dad!" I shout coming after him. "Dad, don't do anything!" I reach out to grab the sleeve of Dad's robes before he can murder Ron.

Dad jerks his arm away from me. "Isobelle Delphine, you get out of my-"

"The both of you, stop!" Mum orders, looking absolutely appalled. "Draco, I told you I could handle this!"

"Hermione, I don't care _what _you told me! Weasley isn't going to speak to you like that!" Dad shouts back, turning to face Ron. "If you so much as speak another word against my daughter- or _any_ of my children, I'll see to it personally that you-"

"Calm down!" I snap. "All of you! I'm sure you can be heard all the way on the other side of the Manor!"

Mum sighs, and I notice her move to stand in front of Dad. He's seething. "Isobelle..."

"I need to say something to you, Mr. Weasley." Ron seems a bit disgusted at me addressing him directly, but I ignore it. "You may hate my father, but he's done something you could never do: he loves children that _aren't _his. You should be grateful that at least _someone_ wants to be a father to your children, since you didn't want to be. You haven't for once thought of how they'll feel when they get older, finding out that one of their parents doesn't even care for them," I tell Ron calmly. I don't understand how he can show up so angry about Nina. Whether or not she's his, I know he won't want anything to do with her. He only wants to spite Mum and Dad.

Ron's attitude doesn't change a bit. Instead, he looks at me as if I'm telling him some sort of lie. I'm not, I know exactly how everything about that situation feels.

Ron clenches his jaw. "Hermione, I'm not asking you again."

Mum turns around and gives Dad a meaningful look. "This was bound to happen," she whispers. "Please, Draco, I think-"

"Fine," Dad relents, looking past Mum and at Ron. "Under one condition, you're never to show your face around my family again."

"I have no plans to. You can be sure of that," Ron replies.

Dad nods in my direction, and I turn to go upstairs. I walk quickly, my heart pounding in my chest. I hope Nina's in her room. If she's with Rose or Hugo, what can I say? Slowly, I walk down the hall to Nina's door.

I reach out and knock. "Come in!" Nina calls from the other side.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door. Nina's at the easel in the corner of her room by the window, fingerpainting. Rose is on Nina's bed, reading a book. Damnit. "Hey, Belly," Nina greets, smiling at me. Rose looks up, too.

"Hey."

"Hello, both of you. Nina, can I see you for a moment?"

"I'm busy painting," Nina informs me. "They're flowers."

I sigh. "I see, and they're very beautiful flowers, but do you think you could clean your hands for a moment and come with me?"

Nina wrinkles her eyebrows. "Why?"

"Because Mummy and Daddy want to see you," I answer, trying not to lose my patience with Nina.

"Am I in trouble?"

"No, but Nina, Mummy and Daddy want to see you _now._"

"Fine, you don't have to be mean," Nina grumbles, getting down from her stool to go to the bathroom and wash her hands.

Rose puts her finger in the middle of her book. "What do Mum and Dad want with Nina?" she asks curiously.

I shrug. "I'm not sure. They don't tell me everything, you know."

"Just about," Rose mutters, not meeting my eyes.

"Why don't you go check on Scorpius and Hugo?" I suggest in an attempt to keep Rose busy.

"They're playing chess. They asked me if I wanted to watch a few minutes ago. I said no," Rose tells me.

"Fine, then. Just read your book," I say as Nina comes out of the bathroom. "Don't dry your hands on your dress. You have towels in your bathroom."

"I know, Belly, but I forgot," Nina explains. I'm not sure how she 'forgot' her hands were wet, but I decide not to ask.

Nina takes my hand in hers. She always does that to me. "Why do Mummy and Daddy want me again?" she asks.

I'm not sure how to answer. "Er... I'm sure they'll tell you."

"Okay." Nina skips down the stairs and nearly drags me over to Dad. "Daddy, Belly said you and Mummy wanted me!"

I don't know whether or not he means to, but Ron's entire body tenses when he sees Nina. Nina stares at Ron with a confused look. "Mummy, who's that?"

Mum fumbles for a response. "Er... this is Mister Wealsey... an old_... friend_ of mine. Say hello."

"Hi," Nina smiles. "You have hair the same color as my brother."

Ron's expression tightens, but he doesn't say anything. He just stares at Nina intently, at the identical pair of blue eyes and freckles looking back at him. Nina does look a lot like Mum, but I notice she does resemble Ron quite a bit, too. There's no way he can't know that she's his. My heart feels like it's going to beat out of my chest, and I'm sure Mum's feels the same way.

"I can't believe you, Hermione," Ron mutters under his breath, looking up again to give Mum a scathing glance. _"Why?"_

"There were multiple reasons," Mum replies in a quiet voice.

Ron shakes his head in disbelief. "I don't even know who you are anymore."

Dad clears his throat and gives Ron an expectant look. "Our deal?" he prompts, gently pulling Nina back.

Ron straightens up and gives Nina one last look. He looks at Dad, then me, then finally Mum. "I'm glad we're divorced," he says before turning and disapparating.

Mum lets out a deep breath and chances a glance at Dad. She's extremely upset.

"How the hell did this even come about?" he asks angrily. Dad knows, but I know he's just trying to see if Mum will tell the truth.

Mum purses her lips. "Apparently, Astoria said something to Ron. How could she have possibly known _anything_?" she asks in a distressed voice.

Dad shakes his head. "It was only a matter of time," he reasons. From the day Astoria came back, it was obvious she knew something wasn't right about Nina. "But I promise you, if Weasley decides to be the idiot I know he is and try to do something about this, he'll regret it."

"Draco," Mum says. "I don't want you doing anything foolish over Ron."

"Please, Hermione. I know better than to get my hands dirty."

"My hands were dirty earlier, too, but then Belly made me clean them. I was fingerpainting," Nina informs Mum and Dad, trying to keep up with their conversation.

Mum gives her a weak smile. She looks shaken. "Have you finished your painting?"

Nina shakes her head, her pigtails waving back and forth. "Not yet. Almost."

"Well, how about you go upstairs and finish your painting, and you can bring it to me and Daddy when you're done? I think Isobelle would quite like to help you," Mum tells Nina, giving me a look to let me know I don't have a choice in the matter.

"Kay, come on, Belly. Let's go finish my painting." Nina takes my hand again to lead me back upstairs.

"Mummy's friend seemed mad to me," Nina realizes, talking to me as we go upstairs. "Did he seem mad to you?"

"A little," I nod.

"And he looked at me weird. Did you see that, Belly?" Nina asks, opening the door to her room.

"See what?" Rose looks up. "What are you guys talking about?"

I open my mouth to answer. "Noth-"

"Mummy's friend!" Nina answers loudly. "He just left."

Rose closes her book and her eyebrows furrow. "Who's Mummy's friend? Didn't you know who he was?"

"Nina shakes her head. "No, I never saw him before. But he had hair the same color like Hugo, and Mummy said his name was-"

"That's enough, Nina," I interject. "Finish your painting."

Rose gestures for Nina to keep talking. "What was his name?"

Nina looks at me. "What was it, Belly? It was kind of funny. 'Mister Wheezy' I think is what Mummy said."

Rose stares at Nina blankly for a second, trying to figure out who that could possibly be. The realization slowly comes across her face, and her mouth sets into a deep scowl and her eyes glare daggers at me.

"Why didn't you say anything?" She demands, slamming her fist on the bed.

"I wasn't supposed to," I answer simply. "Rose, I'm not arguing with you about this. It's not my decision."

"I don't care! You're my sister, you could have said _something_!" Rose argues.

"Why? So you could have your feelings hurt again? I'm sorry that I'd rather not put you through that."

"Yeah, my feelings _definitely _aren't hurt now!" Rose shouts acerbically.

"Why can't you be more like Hugo?" I demand. "Why can't you see that things are better for you this way? You just want trouble!"

I don't mean to be so angry at Rose, but it frustrates me that she doesn't see that Dad cares about her a hell of a lot more than Ron does. I don't know why she wants so badly to ignore that.

"You're _such_ a hypocrite, Belle! All you ever _do_ is get in trouble!" Rose retorts.

"At least I know when things don't concern me!"

Nina gives both Rose and I disapproving looks. "No fighting in my room!" she orders. "I don't like everybody fighting all the time! I'm gonna kick you out if you don't stop!" When Nina says this, it makes me think of things from her perspective. It must be terribly frustrating to see all of us arguing, especially when she doesn't understand why.

Rose picks up her book and tucks it under her arm. "No need. I'm leaving," she mutters. Rose pushes past me and slams Nina's door behind her.

I sit on Nina's bed and rest my chin in my hands. "I'm sorry, Nina," I apologize. "I didn't mean to argue with Rose."

"I know, Belly. But it's still annoying," Nina tells me, dipping her finger in a jar of paint. "And I wish it didn't happen."

"I'm afraid arguing is a part of growing up," I inform Nina.

Nina makes a displeased face. "Oh, then I don't ever want to grow up," she decides. I know, I wish I never had to, either.

* * *

"Isobelle, come downstairs, please. It seems that you have some..._mail_," Mum calls in a resigned voice. She's been awake since early this morning. I don't think she got much sleep last night.

I come downstairs quickly, wondering who could have possibly sent me something. Also, I don't want to irritate Mum by being slow. I know she's terribly upset about everything that happened yesterday.

"It's in the dining room," Mum tells me as I follow her. For some reason, I'm increasingly anxious. Whenever I'm sent something, I expect it. I'm not one for surprises.

The rest of my family is at the table. The mood is somber, and there isn't much chatter like there normally is.

"Good morning," I offer into the room quietly.

"Morning," Dad and Scorpius reply.

"Belly, you got something!" Nina says excitedly, seeming completely unphased by yesterday. Oh, to be six-years-old.

"Yes, Mum's just told me. Where is..._oh_." In my place is an immaculate bouquet of flowers in a vase and a long, velvet box. "These _can't _be for me."

"They are," Mum nods. Cautiously, I walk over to the bouquet. I'm instantly overwhelmed by the sweet smell of roses and lilies, and my eyes can't take in all the colors at once. The beautiful flowers remind me of the ones in our garden. Tied to a red ribbon around the vase is a card. Tentatively, I pull it off and read it to myself. '_Miss Malfoy, I can't resist you'. _I know it's from Simon.

My family looks at me curiously. Finally, Scorpius speaks up. "It's not from Holden, is it?" He questions, making a face.

I shake my head, still completely shocked

"Thank Merlin. What's in the box?"

"I don't know."

"Open it," Hugo suggests. Yes, that would be a good idea.

I sit down and place my hand on the lid of the box, hoping whatever is inside is appropriate for my family to see. I wouldn't put it past Simon. A large gasp escapes my lips as I open the box.

Three necklaces are inside, each more beautiful than the last. They're all set with diamonds and other beautiful jewels, and they catch the light wonderfully. They seem more precious even than some of my jewelry, which is a feat in itself. Just looking at them makes my neck feel heavy.

"Isobelle, what is- oh, dear," Mum puts her hand to her chest. "Who sent you these?"

"S-Simon," I answer, hesitantly, waiting for either of my parents to get angry.

Dad looks up in interest. "Did he?"

I nod. "Yes..."

"Those are really pretty!" Nina beams.

"What could you have done to deserve all of this?" Dad doesn't seem upset in the slightest. Actually, he seems intrigued.

"I don't know," I admit truthfully. Granted, Simon and I kissed and things grew a bit temperate, but he still has no reason to send me any of these gifts.

"You can't accept these," Mum decides. "They're too expensive."

Dad raises an eyebrow. "Hermione, _who _are you married to? _Nothing _is too expensive for Isobelle."

"Draco..." Mum says, letting her voice trail off once she realizes there is no point in arguing it.

Dad turns to me. "I told you things would turn around once you were rid of that dead weight." I know he's talking about Holden.

"You did," I agree, for the sake of the conversation. "I still can't figure why Simon would see it necessary to send me any of this."

Rose raises her eyebrows. "I hope you have _some_ sort of fee." I know she's still angry with me from yesterday.

"Rose!" Mum chastises. "I don't ever want to hear you speak like that again. Apologize to your sister."

"Sorry," Rose mutters, dejectedly pushing her food around her plate with her fork.

I nod. "It's fine, but still, I don't know what to say." It does make me uncomfortable to think that Simon would want to shower me with all these lavish gifts. Can I even accept them without looking like I can be bought?

I glance up, and my family is staring at me once again. "Um... I suppose I should have the flowers moved to my room," I decide, gesturing for a house-elf to take them off the table. "And the necklaces, too."

"You're _keeping _them?' Mum questions in disbelief.

"I really don't think Simon would take them back," I reply. "I'll thank him when I see him again."

Mum doesn't seem too pleased, but she knows there's nothing she can do about it.

For the first time in days, Dad smiles at me. "This is great. I'm proud of you, Isobelle. You're finally maturing."

My eyebrows furrow. "I haven't done anything."

"Obviously, you have," Dad counters. I think he believes that there's _much _more to Simon and I than I'm letting on. Really, there isn't. Dad probably thinks that I had some sort of doing in this.

"No, I didn't. I can't help that Simon's fascinated in me for whatever reason. I don't want you to idealize anything, because I'm certainly not."

Dad shakes his head. "Isobelle, I'm not idealizing anything. Simon comes from a great family is all," he says simply.

"I'm sure I know what you mean by 'great'," I say in a biting tone. "And you can leave that sort of thing for Scorpius."

"Dad was only saying," Scorpius says in what he assumes is a helpful tone.

I know Dad doesn't mean anything by it, but I know he's already throwing around the idea of a marriage between Simon and I in his head. I can tell by the look on his face. I just don't want him to rush into anything, because I'm not. I'm not sure yet what Simon wants from me, and I don't know what I want from him.

"I knew he seemed rather interested in you," Dad continues. "Isobelle, I really do want you to try your best with him. Now, I'm not forcing you to do anything, but since you have the opportunity-"

"Draco!" Mum hisses in a biting tone. "Leave her alone for Merlin's sake! What did we discuss not five days ago?"

That was when Mum told Dad about how much she disagreed with Scorpius' engagement to Daisy, and Dad told her I could marry whomever I wished. I know that's completely true but, given the chance, I'm sure Dad would much rather see me make a pureblood marriage. I won't even lie to myself.

"Hermione, I remember perfectly what we discussed. You told me I was putting Scorpius above Isobelle, and now I'm doing my best not to," Dad replies in a calm tone.

Scorpius wrinkles his eyebrows. "What? Mum-"

"Finish your breakfast, Scorpius," Dad orders him. Scorpius gives Mum and angered look before turning to speak to Hugo instead.

"Like I was saying, Simon's had interests in a lot of women. I honestly don't think _I'll _be any different," I tell Dad.

"I'm sure he hasn't sent any of the others flowers and jewelry," Dad says helpfully. It's been a while since he's been so optimistic toward me.

I shrug. "For all I know, those necklaces could have belonged to his ex-wife," I mutter.

Mum frowns. "Simon was _married_?"

"Yes, but he and his wife were annulled. He didn't love her," I assure Mum. I'm not sure if that makes anything better.

"That's what he told you?"

I nod again. "He mentioned it yesterday. I couldn't believe it, either."

"Do you think he wants a new wife?" Mum questions.

That thought never occurred to me. "I'm not sure. Either way, I'm not rushing into anything. I want to get to know Simon first, and I want him to know me as well," I answer.

"Poor guy," Rose mutters under her breath. Hugo elbows her.

"Rose, did you say something?" Dad questions, giving her a chance to fix her attitude.

"Rose is mad at Belly," Nina tells Dad helpfully. Scorpius rolls his eyes. Nina's terrible at knowing when and when not to say things.

"Why are you upset, Rose?" Mum asks. I can tell she knows that it has to do with Ron.

"No reason. Can I be excused?" Rose crumples her napkin in her fist and drops it in the middle of her plate. "I'm not hungry."

Dad doesn't say anything. He just waves his hand dismissively. Rose practically leaps out of her seat and disappears from the dining room.

"Why's everyone so tense?" Scorpius asks, oblivious to what happened yesterday.

"Yeah, Rose has been like that all morning," Hugo agrees.

"It's Rose, she's always in one mood or another," I say, knowing Mum and Dad don't want me to say anything more than that. "I'm sure she'll be fine later."

"I hope," Hugo says. He perks up like he's just remembered something. "Mum, Dad, can Scorpius and I go to Hogsmeade with Uncle Harry tomorrow? Al and James wrote us asking if we could come."

"Of, course, that's fine, boys," Mum agrees.

"I wanna go, too!" Nina pouts, crossing her arms.

"I'm sure Aunt Ginny would be nothing short of thrilled to see you tomorrow," Mum tells Nina. "Rose, too, hopefully." If Rose has plans to come out of her room, that is.

"What about Belly?" Nina asks, turning to look at me. "You don't wanna see Aunt Ginny?"

"Of course, I'd like to go see Aunt Ginny. But I'm going to the Ministry tomorrow," I tell Nina.

"For Simon?" Scorpius asks, waggling his eyebrows. "Are you going to give him an extra special 'thanks' for those necklaces he sent you?" Hugo starts laughing.

"Scorpius," Dad chastises. I can tell he's trying to hide a slight smile from Mum, who doesn't approve of Scorpius speaking that way at all, especially in front of Nina.

"No, like it's any of your business, you nosy little git. You didn't go to school just to see Daisy, did you?" I ask Scorpius.

"I can see her whenever I want," Scorpius informs me proudly. "She's going to be my _wife_! And not my second one, either!" I know Scorpius is referring to Simon, but he made a quite a poor choice of words. He didn't even think of Mum.

"I don't want to hear any more about it!" Mum snaps. "Honestly, you two. This isn't even an argument you two should be having!"

Dad sighs in exasperation. "They aren't arguing, Hermione-"

"And you're _encouraging_ it!" Mum stands up and throws Dad a dirty look. "I'm going to check on Rose."

"I'm going to go with Mummy," Nina decides, excusing herself from the table.

Dad puts his hand under his chin and watches Mum walk away, Nina bouncing behind her. He doesn't say anything.

Scorpius lets out a gust of air. "These women," he mumbles. "Touchy, touchy." It earns a smirk from Hugo.

"Let that be a lesson to you, Scorpius," Dad says nonchalantly. "Marriages aren't always happy."

* * *

***(A/N: The secret's out! Of course, Astoria had **_**something **_**to do with it! I think things could grow serious between Belle and Simon... Let me know what you thought of the chapter! Leave a review, please!)**


	21. Loved for What You're Not

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!  
*Thank you all for getting me to 300 reviews! Means a lot. **

***Sorry for not updating. I'm on spring break, and also I've been doing a lot of research for a story I want to write. I'm throwing around the possibility of a little historical fiction action! **** I really want to be a writer. **

***Of you didn't know, my #1 fandom is Percy Jackson/ Heroes of Olympus. Just thought I'd share with those of you that I FINALLY saw the S.O.M. trailer. Despite the few inconsistencies, it looks WAY more promising than T.L.T!**

****Title of the chapter comes from 'I Am Not a Robot' by Marina & the Diamonds. Been really into her music lately!**

***Thanks for reading, leave review! On to the story!**

***By the way, since so many of you have asked about it, I imagine Simon to be around 24 years old, since he's about Holden and Teddy's age!**

* * *

"Miss Malfoy," Simon gives a me a knowing smile as I walk into his office. "Did you receive my gifts? I had them made especially for _you_." So, they didn't belong to his wife.

I nod shortly and take a deep breath. "Yes I did, and they were very beautiful, but-"

_But?" _Simon repeats, frowning.

"They're too much. You and I, there's _nothing_ between us and you know that," I remind Simon.

His eyebrows wrinkle. "Nothing?"

"Not so far. And you've got my father thinking there is!"

Simon makes a face like this isn't such a bad thing. "I've always liked your father," he tells me matter-of-factly.

"Well, thank you for that, but he doesn't understand _anything!_ All he sees you for is your last name and your blood!" I inform Simon. "And knowing who my mother is, you know what sort of conflict that's going to cause."

Honestly, I'm more concerned with how my relationship would affect Mum and Dad than how it would affect me. I know with all my heart that Dad truly doesn't only see people for their blood, or else he wouldn't have married Mum. He's just so blinded by the opportunity that I have with Simon to remember that.

"What are you saying?" Simon questions, looking amused. "You don't want me to behave so much like a pureblood? What would you rather I be, then?"

I sigh. "That isn't what I meant. You know I don't care for blood, and no one- don't make that face- in my family does either. And then you come along giving me gifts and everything, making my family think we're together when we aren't. Normal people don't do that!"

Simon raises an eyebrow. "It's normal for me," he counters. "Because I _am _a pureblood."

"_I'm_ not. My mother isn't. Other than Scorpius, none of my siblings are. Because of your pureblood generosity, my father believes that we're in love or what have you, and my mother's absolutely furious!"

"This is my fault?" Simon questions. From his position, it probably sounds completely stupid, but it was rather careless what he did.

"Not entirely, but please, don't do anything like that again, all right?" I ask in a defeated tone. "You can't just send me fancy jewelry and expect me to fall for you."

"Oh, I don't believe that _at all_," Simon tells me. "I sent you flowers as well, didn't I?"

"I hope you aren't serious."

Simon puts his hand on his chin. "Why do you fail to see that I wish to have you?" He questions, stepping closer to me.

"I see that quite clearly," I assure him. "But you've told me how you are. I'm not just going to sleep with you at the drop of a hat, if that's what you think."

Simon twirls a strand of my hair in his fingers. "You make me out to be so terrible," he murmurs.

"No," I shake my head. "I'm just not allowing myself to be hurt again."

"Who's going to hurt you, Miss Malfoy?" Simon questions, his lips close to my ear. "Do you believe _I _will?"

I shrug, hoping I didn't offend Simon. "I don't know. And I'm afraid of _not _knowing. If you're interested in me like you say you are, you'll be willing to get to know me."

"I'd love to know everything about you," Simon assures me.

"Why?" I ask, my voice small.

"Because I'm certain that, deep down, there's another side of you that I would very much like to see," Simon answers.

I have no idea what he's talking about. "Where did you get that idea?"

"Miss Malfoy, I _know _people. I know that you desire nothing more than to impress your family," Simon tells me.

"That depends on what part of my family you're talking about," I correct him. "And I'd never think to do that through a _relationship_."

Simon takes hold of my hand, his thumb pressing into my palm. "Don't confuse my intentions. I'm only saying that if you wish to elevate yourself, I would be the person to do it for you. You come from one of the most renowned wizarding families, and you aren't even treated like it. Does that not bother you?" He questions.

I can't say that it doesn't. But at the same time, I'm not going to use Simon to get ahead. What other people think doesn't mean that much to me, and I certainly won't be a hypocrite to my family.

"I've dealt with it this long."

"And you wouldn't have to any longer. Now, I know you aren't pureblood, but you're a Malfoy nonetheless. If I believed you were good enough for me, then wouldn't others?" Simon reasons.

I understand where he's coming from. Lots of pureblood men end up with half-blood women. But very many _don't_ as well_. _

"Good enough for everything other than marrying you or having your children," I remind Simon bitterly.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," he decides. "Besides, I'm sure you'll be a good match for me."

"Why is that?"

"You may actually prove that I can maintain a relationship," Simon answers nonchalantly.

I frown. "Since when are we in a relationship?" I question, not remembering ever having made that commitment.

Simon kisses me slowly, making this his answer. "As of now. I think it will benefit both of us."

"What does that mean?"

Simon makes a face at me as if I'm a hopeless puppy. "Imagine the look on McKinnon's face when he finds out you and I are together," Simon tells me, smirking. "And I'm sure being with the 'innocent' Isobelle Malfoy will clear my image a bit, and you'll finally get the treatment you deserve."

"I'm not interested in making Holden jealous," I say firmly. Actually, I'd prefer to leave him out of this completely.

Simon shrugs. "Then think of it as an added bonus."

"Who considers me to be innocent?" I question, changing the subject. "Not that I haven't given a reason for people to think otherwise."

Simon scoffs. "Not that they know of. And just about every non-pureblood wizard thinks so. I hear a lot coming in and out of the Ministry."

"Oh."

I bite my lip for a moment, thinking of something. "Will you promise me something?" I question.

"What?"

"You have to promise me that if this relationship interferes with my family and I can't continue it, you'll understand," I tell Simon seriously.

I nearly want to cry when he shakes his head. "Of course, I won't understand it," he tells me.

"Why won't you?" My voice sounds much more like a whine than I want it to.

"Because that isn't ever going to happen," Simon promises me.

I can't hide the relieved smile on my face. "You scared me for a moment."

Simon tightens the grip on my hand. "There's nothing I can't give you, Miss Malfoy. I want you to remember that."

"Of course," I say quietly, thinking of something absolutely brilliant. I look back up at Simon. "I'll have everything that I ask for, won't I?"

Simon nods. "That and more." He checks his watch. "I have to be at a meeting this afternoon. I was rather hoping you'd accompany me." Simon's voice sounds as if he'd had plans for this.

"What sort of meeting?" I ask hesitantly.

"It's nothing serious. I'm only meeting my older brother for lunch, and a bit of talk. I thought I'd bring you along after we're finished for the day," Simon invites me.

"Why?" I question. Simon and I have been 'together' for less than five minutes, and he already wants to show me around.

"He doesn't believe I can get a respectable woman," Simon answers, as if it's an outlandish remark to make. "And I'd love nothing more than to show him differently."

"What would you have done had I said no?" I ask.

"Invited you anyway. I'm sure you can lie just as well as anyone."

I don't know what Simon means by that. "All right, well, I suppose I can come. Should I dress differently?"

Simon shakes his head. "Of course, not. You look absolutely stunning," he assures me.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now, I'd like to finish work early so that we can meet my brother and get it over with."

* * *

A couple hours later, Simon is leading me into a restaurant. I've been here before, but only on a few occasions. As we near a secluded table far in the back, Simon murmurs to me out of the corner of his mouth, "My brother's much worse than I am." I don't know what to make of it, because everyone likes to think that they're better than their siblings.

Simon's brother stands as we arrive at the table. I would guess that he was about five or six years older than Simon. He and Simon resemble each other greatly, except Simon's brother's hair is a darker shade of gold. They both have that air about them that suggests they can't think of anything better than themselves.

"Isobelle, this is my brother, Eric. Eric-"

"Isobelle Malfoy," Simon's brother finishes, while he generously extends a hand in my direction. "I've heard much about you."

I can't say the same. "Simon's told me about you as well. It's a pleasure to finally meet you."

Simon pulls out my chair for me so I can be seated. Eric gestures to the woman beside him. She's pretty, with dark hair and hazel eyes. Simon gives her a quick kiss on the cheek. "Isobelle, this is my wife, Jane."

"Pleased to meet you," I say politely.

Jane gives me a very stiff smile, as if it pains her. "Likewise."

Eric meets me with a surveying gaze that makes me feel a bit uncomfortable. "Miss-"

"Please, just call me Isobelle."

Eric gives Simon an amused look. "Do excuse me. _Isobelle_, you're quite lovely," he comments. Eric's compliment sounds completely platonic, unlike Simon's suggestive voice.

"Thank you," I smile.

"Young and beautiful are two of the best things a woman can be," Jane adds kindheartedly. I'm sure the third thing has to do with blood.

"Young?" I repeat, confused. "I'm twenty-one." Jane's made me sound like a child.

Eric seems rather impressed to hear this. "Simon, it seems your taste in women's finally aged. How old was that last girl? Seventeen? Eighteen?" I'm rather surprised to hear this, but I don't say anything.

"Of age," Simon replies stiffly, narrowing his eyes at his brother.

"No, not the one from last week. The week _before_!" Jane jokes. Simon doesn't seem entertained. I'm not either. I just feel uncomfortable.

Simon's jaw clenches. "We can speak more about women if you'd really like to," he offers. The smile on Eric's face leaves. The atmosphere grows more and more tense. "But I don't think that's the reason you wanted to talk to me originally?"

"No," Eric shakes his head. Simon looks smug. "It isn't. Actually, I wanted to give you this. It's a letter from Father."

Simon takes the envelope of parchment and regards it stiffly. "What does it say?"

"I didn't read it," Eric scoffs. "It's for you."

The waiter comes by and Eric and Simon place their orders. I open my mouth to speak, and then close it once I realize Simon's already ordered for me. He turns back to Eric as if this is normal. Jane certainly doesn't see a problem with it.

Simon slips the letter into his robes. "Well, you can tell Father that I have no interest whatsoever in-"

"Still upset, are you?" Eric questions, raising his eyebrows. Jane shakes her head and makes a disapproving sound through her teeth.

"Of course, I am," Simon snaps.

"Excuse me, am I missing something?" I ask.

"Simon's father wrote him out of the will," Jane answers with no sympathy whatsoever. "Eric and I told you not to separate from Catherine. What did it get you?"

I feel terrible for Simon. He may be a bit shallow at times, but I don't feel he deserves to be punished for not wanting to be with a woman he didn't love. I know he's only a product of his environment.

"I think his choice was admirable," I say, coming to Simon's defense. Simon looks as if he's been slapped across the face. "Perhaps Simon thought he should be able to think of his _own_ happiness for once."

"Don't be fooled, Isobelle. Simon thinks of his 'happiness', as you put it, a fair bit," Eric tells me, taking a slow sip of his drink. "If he didn't, he'd still be married and clear out of trouble."

How can Eric talking about ignoring his own happiness for a marriage while sitting right beside his wife? And how can she not have anything to say about it? It's sickening.

"That would depend on what you consider trouble- being out of a will or being in a dead-end marriage," I inform Eric.

He doesn't seem too pleased. "My, you certainly are opinionated. You're nothing like your brother."

I frown. "How do you know my brother?" I question.

"I've met him quite a few times. Your father brings him to the Falcons' matches quite often. Among his many business pursuits, my father happens to be team manager," Simon tells me. Of course, Dad's mentioned that once or twice before. Hell, even Astoria has. How could I have forgotten?

I nod. "Being related doesn't automatically give us the same beliefs. I'm sure you know that."

Eric throws Simon a dirty look. "Indeed I do."

Jane purses her lips. "So, how did the two of you meet?" She questions, trying to diffuse things.

"Miss- Isobelle is my intern," Simon answers rigidly.

"There are other ways to meet women," Eric mutters into his plate.

"Why are you so bothered by everything that I do?" Simon demands, raising his voice slightly. "The last time I checked, _none_ of my choices affect you personally!"

Eric takes a deep breath, the kind Dad does when he's sick of telling Scorpius or Hugo not to do something. "Your actions are a reflection on this family. How many times do we have to tell you that? How can you go into the Ministry, behave professionally all day, and then go sleep around? You should at least care that people don't find out."

Simon has a look on his face as if he wants to say it's quite easy. However, he decides against it. "I'm not sleeping around," he says through clenched teeth.

Jane and Eric frown slightly and put their attention on me. I shake my head. "Well, I didn't expect that," Jane mutters. It's sad just how rude Eric and Jane are to Simon. I'd be angry too if I were him.

"How long have you been together?" Eric questions.

"Just this week," Simon lies. I haven't even been seeing Simon for an entire _day_, but I'm sure admitting that wouldn't much help his case. "I'm sure this is the beginning of more weeks to come."

Jane gives me a sympathetic look. "A dragon never changes its scales," she tells me.

"I think that'll be for me to decide," I let Jane know.

Simon looks like he could snap his fork in half. Eric gestures his glass in my direction. "It's the truth. Isobelle, don't let my brother trick you. I'm sure he finds your naïveté-"

"I refuse to listen to this!" Simon snaps. He stands up, slamming some galleons onto the table. He turns to Eric with a look of utter disgust. "I was at least upfront about cheating on _my _wife! Don't think I don't know that you're just as dishonest as I was! The only difference is _you're_ still married!"

Simon turns on his heel to leave, giving me no choice but to follow him. The last I see of Eric and Jane are the horrified and embarrassed looks on their faces.

"Simon!" I call, trying to draw as little attention to myself as possible while exiting the restaurant. "_Simon!"_

I catch up to him outside, and Simon finally turns around. I give him a moment to calm down before speaking again.

"You didn't have to cause a scene," I say. "It wasn't worth it."

"Wasn't worth it? You have no idea," Simon tells me gruffly.

"You're absolutely correct. I don't know what it feels like to be put down by my own family," I mutter back. "You didn't have to out your own brother like that. Think of how his wife must feel."

Simon rolls his eyes. "I honestly don't give a damn how she feels. I'm sure my brother doesn't, either."

"It's beyond me how you and your brother can cheat on your wives with no guilt whatsoever. When I-"

"You have to care about the person in the first place to care what happens to them," Simon cuts me off. He has a point, but I still don't want Simon to think that sort of thing is all right. "It's beside the point, anyway. I'm not concerned about that in particular."

I know what Simon's talking about. I put my hand on his arm comfortingly. His muscles are tense. "Well, maybe you could just read the letter, and then talk to your father? Maybe he'll understand."

"Isobelle, how can you prove to me one day that you know how things work, and now you act like you don't?"

"I'm fully aware, Simon. I just think that you should at least try to work things out with your family. You may regret it if you don't."

Simon won't look at me. "Not every family is as caring as yours. My father is _never_ going to accept what I did." Simon is right. My family does have its quirks, but we try to be supportive of each other for the most part.

"What about your mother?" I suggest helpfully.

Simon shakes his head. "If my father won't, then neither will my mother. My parents are going to be angry with me unless I take another wife." Simon lets that statement hang in the air.

"You still have plenty of time for that," I assure him. I don't know what else to say.

"This isn't for you to worry about," Simon tells me in a frustrated tone. "Don't concern yourself with me."

"Yes, I do," I argue. "If I'm going to be your girlfriend, I'm _supposed_ to be concerned with you," I explain. Simon cringes at the word 'girlfriend'. I'm sure he's never used it before.

It's rather odd to see this side of Simon. Normally, he's assertive and commanding, but now I see a sort of vulnerability in him much like the one I see in Scorpius. I'm sure if I said any of this to Simon, he would readily deny it.

I don't know how I _can't _worry. Whenever I look at Simon, I feel as if I'm seeing the man Scorpius will grow up to be. I'm not sure if I like that.

Simon sighs, his eyes focused straight ahead. "Isobelle-"

"You can't change how I feel," I say adamantly, taking Simon's hand. "If I care, I care. If you think your family changes my opinion of you, then you're wrong."

Finally, Simon looks at me. He has a hungry expression in his eyes as he pulls me closer to him. I stumble clumsily over my feet. "We need to go somewhere. Somewhere _private_," he tells me, his voice low.

I shake my head slightly, trying to keep my facial expression from changing. After all, we're in public. "You don't know me well enough yet."

"Of course, I _know _you. We've been out on a date," Simon persists. I hope he doesn't really think that train wreck counts as a date.

"Fine, if you can answer this for me," I say nonchalantly.

Simon's eyebrows rise, and his hand snakes to my lower back. "Anything."

"What's my middle name?" I ask.

"That isn't fair, you haven't told me it yet," Simon complains.

"My birthday, then," I prompt.

"Sometime this year," Simon answers, as if this is a good enough answer. "We can go to my-"

Despite myself, I laugh. "Nice try. _No._"

* * *

"I'm home," I call into the house, wondering where my parents are. I know all my younger siblings are out for the day, and I'm rather grateful for it. The house will be a lot quieter.

"Isobelle," Mum says from the sitting room. "I'm in here." I come in and take a seat in the chair by the window." Mum is opposite me, reading a book. She closes her book and smiles at me. It's forced.

"I didn't expect you to be home so early," she tells me. "Have you eaten?"

"I was supposed to have," I mutter.

Mum's eyebrows furrow. "What do you mean?"

"Well, after we'd done everything, Simon offered to take me to lunch-"

"That's nice," Mum says absentmindedly, her lips pressed into a thin line and her expression stoic. "Are you and Simon…?"

"Apparently so," I nod. "But it was terrible, Mum. We met Simon's brother and his sister-in-law, and they got into an argument and Simon stormed out."

Mum frowns. "What were they arguing over?"

I want to answer, but I feel like it'll anger Mum even more. "Because Simon left his wife, their father wrote him out of his will. Simon's brother thinks Simon's a disgrace to their family, and it's obvious his wife thinks the same. They were so mean to him," I say.

"That's horrible," Mum agrees.

"That isn't the worst of it. Simon thinks he needs to _impress_ them, it's disgusting."

Mum gives me a distasteful look. "I know the sort." Something tells me she and Dad still haven't gotten over their argument from yesterday. Come to think of it, they didn't really speak to each other at breakfast, either.

"You're still angry at Dad?" I guess.

"Isobelle, your father and I are having our differences at the moment," Mum says stiffly.

I don't know why she won't just say yes. I hope she and Dad can forgive each other soon. "I know. But, you two really need to talk about it. You know Dad loves you more than anything," I assure Mum. "That hasn't changed. And you know he loves all of us the same."

"I know," Mum tells me shortly. "But your father and I both agreed on how this family should be run. He isn't exactly holding up to that at the moment."

"Well, Scorpius-"

"I'm not talking about Scorpius anymore. That's a losing battle."

"Me, then?" I ask. Mum nods. "I don't like Simon for his blood, and Dad knows that."

"I'm sure that won't affect his thoughts."

I'm silent for a while, trying to think of something to encourage Mum to talk things out with Dad. "Don't you think Dad knows that blood has nothing to do with how good a marriage is? The both of you were married to purebloods and _that_ didn't work out," I reason. "If he cared so much, he wouldn't have married_ you_."

"I suppose," Mum admits. "But a wife and daughter are two very different things."

"What do you mean?"

"To be honest, I feel your father thinks that a pureblood man would be inclined to treat you better," Mum says.

I shake my head vigorously. "That isn't true at all. Holden and Teddy both were very kind to me, while Simon and his brother have _both_ cheated on their wives," I reason. "Blood has nothing to do with anything."

Mum looks uncomfortable. "Isobelle, it does bother me that Simon has… _gotten around_ as much as he has. I don't want him to be that way with you as well."

"He won't be," I assure Mum. "Simon's only the way he is because no one's ever refused him. Really, he does like to be helpful, I think." I'm sure Simon's completely capable of being in an honest relationship, if only he learned to show his emotions more.

"I just don't want him to mistreat you," Mum says again. We both turn around as footsteps echo into the room.

It's Dad.

"Hermione, do I have to tell you anymore that Simon is a perfect gentleman?" He questions, coming into the sitting room. The look on his face is unreadable. I debate whether or not I should leave while I still can.

Mum's body goes rigid. "Draco, I'm referring to Simon's character, _not_ his heritage."

Dad turns to me. I hope he isn't going to ask me to take his side. "Simon treats you well, doesn't he, Isobelle?" he asks.

I nod hesitantly. "Yes…"

"Of course, he does. If you're anything like your mother, then he would have no choice," Dad says, glancing at Mum instead of me. I know this is Dad's lame form of an apology. I almost want to smile.

Mum drums her fingers on the cover of her book in thought. I can tell she doesn't want to accept Dad's apology so quickly, but she will eventually. This has been the dynamic between my parents for years. One of them finally works up the humility to apologize to the other, and then after a bit of grudge-holding and serious conversation, my parents are perfectly fine again.

"Isobelle, would you mind giving your father and me a moment to talk?" Mum questions. I can tell she's already thinking of the million things she wants to say to Dad, and he's coming up with the other million ways to justify himself. It's like clockwork.

I shake my head and stand up. "No, I don't mind at all."

* * *

**(A/N: Sorry I didn't update for a while, I'm on spring break! Hope you guys liked the chapter! Leave a review!)**


	22. He Says I'm in Love

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!  
**

**********SO SORRY**** for not updating in like three weeks. I've been working on this chap since I uploaded the next one, but I've been so busy with school. Last week, we had semester midterms, and I was on a field trip to the beach this entire week! Again I'm sorry to everyone I kept waiting! I feel terrible!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Big Parade' by the Lumineers!**

***Leave a review!**

* * *

The past few days have come and gone rather uneventfully. For the most part, Mum and Dad have reconciled.

Since I have nothing to do today, I've been all but trapped into 'watching' my siblings. James, Lily, Al, and Daisy are over, once again, and Mum's asked me to listen out for them. I'm sitting in Nina's room with the door open. I'd much rather have the day to sleep.

"Belly?" Nina questions as she looks up at me. "Are you gonna keep reading?"

"I'm done," I tell her. "The story's over." I've been reading to Nina for the better part of twenty minutes. She can read herself, but she says she prefers hearing my voice.

Nina shrugs, and then takes the book from my hands. It's Scorpius' tattered old copy of _Beedle the Bard._ He gave the book to Nina because he finds the stories stupid now. They used to be his favorites.

"Read this one now. Mummy and Daddy haven't read it to me in a long time."

"Nina, do I have to read to you?" I question, trying my hardest not to sound exasperated.

Nina shakes her head. "Not if you really don't want. We could have a tea party, or play dress-up, or hide-and-seek, or whatever you want. What do you wanna do, Belly?" Nina stares at me with wide eyes, waiting for an answer.

"A nap would be lovely," I answer. "How about we both take one?"

"That's boring!" Nina scrunches her nose and her freckles form a blurred line across her cheeks. "It's not late, why are you sleepy?"

"It's just one of those days. I'm sure it's the rain," I answer, yawning.

Nina laughs. "I want to go into the rain," she decides, eyeing her pair of pink flowered rain boots.

"You'll get sick. Mum and Dad won't be happy about that."

A crestfallen expression crosses Nina's face. "But I've never done it before. Have _you _ever played in the rain, Belly?"

I think back to the first and last time I ever did, with Holden. I shake my head stiffly. "No, it's a very stupid thing to do."

"How do you know, then?" Nina counters.

"I just do."

Nina wrinkles her eyebrows in thought. "If we can't go in the rain, we can take a nap if you want. Now there's nothing else fun to do."

"Thank you, Nina."

"Welcome. You can sleep in my bed with me, and I won't take all the blankets. Mummy will come wake us up for lunchtime."

I can't help but smile at my youngest sister. She really is the most generous little thing on the planet, and it's amazing how much she takes after Hugo. I hope she doesn't lose her character when she grows up.

I'm about to respond to Nina when a loud shout from down the hall cuts me off. It sounds a bit like Rose, but I can't make it out clearly. I wonder what she's on about now.

"Did you hear that?" I ask Nina.

She nods. "Yeah. Someone's yelling."

I press my finger to my lips to quiet her so we both can listen. Another voice is shouting at her, a voice that I presume is Daisy's. I roll my eyes inwardly. Then, I hear Scorpius' voice, and James' voice joins in as well. I'm sure Al is part of the conversation, but his voice is always so quiet, there's no way I could hear it from down the hall.

I hear a loud slam, then Rose shouts, "You stupid bint! I'll _kill_ you!"

"_ROSE!"_ James shouts.

I sigh. I suppose I have to go see what's going on. If it isn't one thing, it's another. I turn to Nina. "Just stay right here. I'll be back in a moment."

Nina nods compliantly. "Kay. I will."

When I go into the games room, my face sets into a frown. The table in the middle of the room is overturned. Rose is being held back by James, and she looks absolutely enraged. Scorpius and Daisy are sitting on the other end of where the table is supposed to be, and Daisy looks smug as ever. Al is staring at the four of them, wide-eyed.

"What is happening in here?" I demand.

"Your sister tried to attack me like some mad _animal_," Daisy informs me, narrowing her eyes at Rose.

I refrain from telling Daisy that she most likely deserved it. "Rose, why would you do something like that?" I question, gesturing to James that he can let her go. Rose has something in her fist, but she won't open it.

She falters for a moment. "Because… because Daisy-"

"Because I _what_?" Daisy questions, tilting her head to the side. Now she's just trying her best to get a rise out of Rose. "I didn't do a thing."

"Then what reason would Rose have to try and hit you?" I ask.

Daisy shrugs. "Because she hates me? I don't know. Do _you_ know, Scorpius?"

I don't know whether or not I'm asking in vain. I'm not sure who Scorpius will want to defend. Scorpius shakes his head, and Al gives him a disapproving look. "Al?" I question, hoping he'll speak up.

"They were fighting over a necklace," Al tells me quietly, adjusting his glasses as if making that statement was emotionally taxing.

"Thank you, Al." I turn to Scorpius' abominable fiancé. "Do you have something that belongs to Rose?"

Daisy raises her eyebrows in disbelief. "Are you accusing me of something?"

"I'm asking you a question. Do you or do you not have it?"

Rose doesn't say anything but by the look on her face, I can tell she fears she might be in trouble.

Daisy reaches into her robes pocket and pulls out part of a silver necklace. She dangles it from her fingers. "Well, _part _of it, anyway. It's rather ugly, I don't want it."

Rose clenches her jaw. I step forward and yank the necklace from Daisy. It's _mine._ "How did you get this?" I question, glaring between Daisy and Rose.

Daisy points to Rose, smirking. I could take her head off.

"I know _that._ Rose, how did you get it?"

Rose is infuriated to the point of tears. We may not be in each other's favor right now, but I won't give Daisy the satisfaction of embarrassing her.

"Rose, come with me," I say gently, gesturing my hand for Rose to follow me. I glance over my shoulder back at Albus, Daisy, James, and Scorpius. "I don't want any more arguments. James, you're in charge." He's definitely the most responsible out of the lot. Scorpius isn't worthy of that title.

I shut the door, and put my arm around Rose. She avoids my eyes. I walk her down the hallway a fair bit, so no one else can hear us.

"Why do you have my necklace?" I question softly.

Rose takes a deep breath. "Teddy sent it back to you," she admits. "His owl came this morning, and you were still asleep, so I took it. I planned on giving it back to you later, then it fell out of my pocket and Daisy took it and I didn't know what she was going to do with it, so I tried to get it back, and she wouldn't let go..." Rose's explanation comes out in one long sentence. I only catch one word of it.

"_Teddy_?" I repeat.

Rose nods. "I was going to tell you. I promise."

"I know," I assure Rose. "I believe you."

Rose's eyebrows wrinkle. "You aren't mad at me?"

I shake my head. "No, it isn't your fault. Besides, I don't really care for that necklace anymore anyway."

"Why not?"

I open my mouth, and then close it. "It doesn't really mean anything to me anymore," I tell Rose. "You can get rid of it if you want."

Rose looks uncomfortable, but she doesn't ask me to say anything else about it. "Please, as much as we _all _dislike her; _try_ to get along with Daisy. She's going to be around for a while, and it'll be easier on us the lesser conflicts we have."

"I_ was_ trying," Rose protests. "But then she took your necklace, and I lost it."

I know Rose won't outright say so, but her actions are some sort of an apology. "I understand that, but really it's no need to hit. There are better ways to handle things."

Rose gives me a knowing look. "Really? Because Dom told me that you-"

"That was different," I tell Rose quickly. She gives me a small smile. "Are we all right, now?"

"I guess," Rose agrees.

"Great, because I'd really like to have a nap, and Nina needs someone to entertain her."

Rose frowns. "Do I have to?" I don't understand why Rose and Scorpius have such an aversion to Nina. They act as if she's a house-elf and not their sibling.

"She's your _sister_," I remind Rose. I gesture to the window beside us. Raindrops violently pelt the window. "Besides, it's raining. What else are you going to do with your time?"

"Read a book," Rose suggests. "Anything else."

I shake my head. "No you won't. The least you could do is spend some time with Nina. How would have felt if I always ignored you?" I question, crossing my arms.

Rose mulls this over for a moment. "Fine, but if I have to do anything princess, I'm pitching myself from her balcony."

I nudge Rose on the shoulder. "I wouldn't make a promise I don't intend to keep."

Rose stops and turns around with a puzzled expression on her face. "Why did Teddy have your necklace in the first place?" She asks.

I don't know what to tell her. I can't tell him the truth. "I left it at his flat," I say vaguely.

"That must have been forever ago," Rose realizes, stuffing her hands in her pockets. "You haven't seen Teddy since that day when…"

She's tactful enough not to say that day when Dad lost it over Holden. "I know, it's been a long while."

Rose stuffs her hands in the pockets of her jeans. "How come you haven't spoken to Teddy in such a long time?"

"We, we just aren't the best of terms with each other at the moment."

Rose seems sorry to hear this. Even she knows how close Teddy and I were. "You guys talked like every day. Now he really only talks to Dom a lot."

"Dom?" I ask, before I can help myself. I have an uneasy feeling in my stomach.

Rose nods. "Yeah, Teddy broke up with Victoire. Dom says it's because Teddy said he loves another girl. If you ask me, Victoire deserved it. Anyway, so is Teddy mad at you?" Rose asks.

I shake my head. I'm not sure whether it's from answering Rose's question, or being in complete shock. Teddy broke up with Victoire? And he loves someone else? "W-why would he be angry with me?"

"Because you cheated on Holden," Rose reminds me. "And Holden's his best friend."

Her reasoning is a lot better than the truth. I decide to go along with it. "I'm sure that's why."

Rose gives me a sympathetic look. "Maybe if you didn't like Holden anymore, you could have told him?"

"It wasn't that easy. When you get older, you'll understand."

Rose pushes back the curtain and sits down on the window seat. At least now that she's below me, we aren't eye-to-eye anymore. Rose hasn't said anything for a few seconds, but I feel as if she's judging me in her thoughts.

"I don't see why no one ever stays together," she tells me sadly, playing with the curtain. She looks out the window instead of at me.

"That isn't true for everyone," I assure her. I don't know how to make Rose believe me, because all the people close to her have made some terrible choices for companions.

"Just about. What about Mum and Dad? What about _my _dad and Scorpius' mum? What about you and Holden? And Teddy and Victoire? Everyone tells people that the love them, and then later on they don't," Rose explains.

I put my hand to my forehead for a second, trying to think of something to say. "It isn't that it's a lie, it's just- sometimes, the person you're with isn't always the same person you initially fell in love with," I tell Rose.

"People change all the time, though," she persists. "Of course, they aren't the same.

I shake my head. "This is very different. I mean, at first that person is incredibly sweet and kind to you, and you're positive that they love you. And then, sometimes, when all the fun of it wears off, they don't exactly like to be around you anymore, or they take you for granted. Does that make sense?"

Rose still seems confused.

"Think of it this way: Think of how many new dolls and toys Nina gets. When she first gets them, she's incredibly excited and s_wears_ they'll be her favorite forever, right?"

Rose nods.

"But then a week later, they're stuffed under her bed and forgotten about to collect dust. Well, sometimes it can be that way with relationships," I explain. "And if you're lucky, sometimes it isn't."

"Well, how do you know when it's not?" Rose questions.

I shrug, and I can tell that this wasn't the answer she was hoping for. "You never really know, I suppose. You just have to hope that person cares about you as much as you do them. Sometimes you get hurt, but other times, you don't. It's worth finding out, or so I've been told."

Rose puts her fist under her chin and nibbles her bottom lip. "I'm sorry for getting mad at you about my dad. And I'm sorry about those comments I made about Simon," she apologizes.

I wave my hand. "I forgive you. I could have handled it better."

Subconsciously, Rose nods. "Yeah. But I mean, Mum and Dad love each other a lot, right?"

I don't understand how Rose can have any doubt in her mind about that. I haven't for years now. "Absolutely."

"So we don't have to worry about them breaking up?" She asks. When Rose won't look at me, I can tell this has been bothering her for quite a while.

"Not in this lifetime," I promise her.

* * *

Dinner feels rather tense. Scorpius and Rose aren't particularly speaking to each other. However, Mum and Dad seem to have gotten over their little argument. Hugo is recounting all the details of his afternoon flying with Lily.

When Hugo finishes, Dad clears his throat. We all look up. "I need to make something clear," he announces.

"What?" Nina asks.

Dad looks between the five of us, and Mum looks as if she's expected it. "_None _of you are special."

Scorpius frowns. "My self-esteem just took a hit," he mutters. Rose rolls her eyes.

"I'm serious," Dad persists. "The seven of us are a family, and we need to start acting like it. Now, I understand perfectly that we aren't all always going to get along, but these constant arguments are getting downright ridiculous."

"I agree completely," Mum says. "We used to all get along so well, and now it seems to be an a_ccomplishment_ if something terrible doesn't happen. Things aren't going to be that way anymore."

Rose gives Scorpius an accusing look. "I think you need to explain the concepts of being a family to Scorpius more than anyone," she suggests bitterly.

Scorpius rolls his eyes.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Dad questions.

"It means that Scorpius shouldn't take Daisy's side over mine!" Rose says indignantly.

"Shut up," Scorpius hisses.

Mum and Dad both look completely confused. "When has that ever happened?" Mum asks.

"About three hours ago," Rose answers accusingly.

Nina nods in agreement. "Yeah, they were yelling really loudly. Me and Belly heard them _all_ the way from my room."

"Yelling about what?" Dad questions. I'm not sure who, but I can tell that either Scorpius or Rose is about to be in trouble. Perhaps both of them will be. Hugo and I sit and watch as were at a play.

Neither Scorpius nor Rose says anything. Scorpius pretends to be interested in the rain beating on the windows. It sounds louder in the silence.

"I'm not asking again," Dad tells them both, a disapproving look on his face. "What _happened_ this afternoon?

Rose sets her fork down and looks at me. A pleading expression is on her face. "Rose and Daisy got into some silly argument. It was rather petty," I lie, covering for Rose.

Mum makes a face. "You were there, Isobelle?"

"Well, I...er… they were raising their voices, like Nina said, and I went to see what the commotion was. They were arguing over some game."

"And Scorpius, you took Daisy's side over Rose's?" Dad reiterates, revisiting the problem at hand.

Scorpius nods. "Kind of. Rose was wrong, though. I wasn't making favorites," he promises. I can tell Rose just kicked him under the table. None of us can acknowledge it, though, because we're all lying.

"In any case, it's only a game, Rose, and you shouldn't make such a big deal out of small matters," Dad tells Rose.

She tries her best to look shameful. "I know, Dad. I'm sorry."

Dad takes a sip from his glass, ending that topic of conversation. Rose breathes a sigh of relief. "As your mother and I were saying, we don't want any more divides amongst the five of you. You're all siblings, and you need to _treat_ each other as such. And your mother and I need to treat you that way as well."

"Huh?" Hugo asks. "Don't you do that already?" Oh, poor, naïve Hugo.

"To a certain extent. We're just trying to work on being fairer to all of you," Mum answers kindly.

Nina looks up. "More fair? Can I go play in the rain?"

"No," Mum and Dad answer together.

"You don't want to be sick in the summertime, love," Mum tells her. I don't know why Nina's so bent on going out in the rain, anyway. It isn't great at all.

Nina pouts. "That's _not_ fair!"She complains. "Belly said I couldn't go out in the rain and now you won't let me, either."

"That's correct," Dad responds. "You know how terrible you are when you catch cold." When Nina gets sick, it may as well be the end of the world. She swears a stuffy nose is a death sentence.

"More terrible than normal," Scorpius mutters. Still, he's loud enough for Dad to hear him.

"Scorpius, that's exactly the kind of behavior your mother and I were talking about. Apologize to your sister."

Scorpius looks as if he's just been told to do the unthinkable. Dad raises his eyebrows, waiting for Scorpius' apology. "I'm sorry," he mutters.

"That's okay," Nina replies, most likely unaware that Scorpius even said anything to begin with. She pushes her dessert around with her spoon. "Daddy, if I can't go in the rain, then can I have a pink cow?"

* * *

"Doesn't it get lonely living here on your own?" I ask Simon. To make up for that horrible meeting with his brother, Simon's invited me over to have tea at his house. It was a kind gesture, but I can't help but be rather apprehensive. I don't know why.

Simon shakes his head. "Not at all, I normally have…" his voice trails off, and I'm rather glad he didn't finish. Simon clears his throat. "Anyhow, I'm sure it's better than having children running around all day."

"That isn't so bad. Well, you get used to it, at least," I assure Simon. Now, I couldn't ever imagine Malfoy Manor being completely quiet. That would almost scare me.

"I couldn't ever," Simon mutters, a disgusted look on his face. Something tells me he isn't so fond of children.

Simon's home really is beautiful. However, it's very dark inside. I glance out the window, at the garden at the far end of the lawn. Finally, some color. Some of the flowers are rather familiar, and I realize that they were most likely the ones Simon sent to me. "I never took you as someone to have a garden," I say, smiling.

His expression is stiff. "I don't. It was my wife's idea," he says bitterly. I want to kick myself. I should have known so.

"Oh, I didn't…" I'm not sure what to say. Luckily, Simon ignores it. Before I can think of something better, I say, "Do you ever think about her?"

Simon seems caught off-guard by the question. He's probably wondering why I want to know. I'm not even sure why. "No, of course not. We aren't married anymore; I don't have a reason to."

That isn't a valid reason. Mum still thinks about Ron, I'm sure Dad thinks of Astoria, and not a day goes by that I don't think of Holden, and we weren't even married. "I wouldn't be upset if you did," I assure him, reaching out to touch Simon's hand. It's cold.

"I've told you. I never loved nor cared about my wife. That isn't going to change."

I decide not to press matters with Simon. I don't want to anger him. "Do you ever want to be married again?"

"I have to get married again," Simon informs me. The tone in his voice reminds me of the reason why.

"That's right," I mutter. "You _have_ to. If you want your inheritance. But maybe your father is testing you. Maybe he wants to see if you can really be your own person."

Simon gapes at me like I'm telling a stupid joke. He presses his lips into a thin line, and he looks at me for a long while. "My father doesn't play games. I have to remarry."

"Oh."

Simon squeezes my hand. "And when I do, I'd like you to be my wife."

I pull my hand away from Simon so quickly, one of my rings comes off my finger. "Are you _mad?_" I question, not knowing what to think. I dearly hope Simon is toying with me. But, I think he's just as serious as his father.

"No, I'm perfectly sane," Simon replies brusquely, as if I've offended him.

"You can't be. _Sane_ people don't propose marriage after a week of dating. If you can even call this dating! I'm sorry, but I can't… I don't…"

Simon puts his hand on his forehead and sighs. "I'm not asking you to marry me _now._ Believe me, when I propose to you, you'll know. Now would you please sit down?"

I didn't even realize I was standing. Slowly, I take my seat again. "We can't talk about marriage right now, we need something to work toward."

"Excuse me?" Simon questions. I've finally met someone who knows less about relationships than I do.

"When you think of marriage, all that comes to mind is just doing what your parents say. A real marriage is much more than that. It's based on love, and caring, and trust, and all sorts of other things. And I'm positive you don't love me yet," I tell Simon. "You don't know yet that you want to marry me."

Simon blinks slowly, and his blue eyes look dazed. "You're beautiful, and passionate, and loyal, and brilliant. Out of all the women I've ever slept with, they've never been as intriguing as you," Simon tells me. I take it as a compliment.

"Er…thank you."

"You don't have to thank me," Simon tells me. He wrings his hands. "Just stay with me. Words can't possibly describe how much I want you." I'm sure this is the most romantic thing Simon's ever said to a woman.

I grin at him. "I know that,"

Simon raises a golden eyebrow with a smirk. "Do you, now?"

"Absolutely," I nod.

Simon stands up and extends his hand toward me. "There's another place I want to show you."

I take his hand and follow him through the sitting room and up the stairs. There aren't any pictures, but instead some very interesting paintings are hanging. Some of them I've seen before, others I haven't.

"You have great taste," I comment.

"I know I do," Simon replies, a hint in his voice. He leads me down a long hallway.

I take a deep breath. Something's been nagging at me for a few days now, and I've wanted to ask Simon about it. "Simon, I was wondering if-"

Simon opens a door. When I see where he's taken me, I stop roll my eyes inwardly. I should have known. "It's your bedroom," I say. Simon's room is a calm, deep green color. Everything matches perfectly, down to the wood colors of the bed frame and dresser.

"Correct." Simon turns to me.

"You never quit, do you?" I ask, growing rather amused at this point. Simon's like a teenage boy. "I had to ask you something, do we have to do this right now?"

Simon comes closer to me. "I can quit when you finally say yes," he whispers, seeming more interested in my lips than the words coming out of them.

"You may be waiting a while." I put my hand out to hold Simon at bay. It isn't even worth it. He moves my hand and kisses me, slow at first, then as if his life depends on it. I suppose anything I wanted to say is going to have to wait.

Simon's teeth graze along my neck and across my throat. His hands move rapidly along my chest, rushing to undo my robes as quickly as possible. As his fingers near the last button, I pull away to stop him. Simon gives me a look of displeasure.

"I've waited for so long. You can't possibly tease me any longer", he growls, reaching for me again.

I shake my head playfully. It really is gratifying to see Simon in such a state.

"I understand. And I know it hasn't been easy for you, and you've been so wonderful to me despite everything."

"Not wonderful enough," Simon murmurs, a pouting expression on his face. It makes me want to laugh.

I tap my finger to my chin. "Well, I suppose you've earned a small _something_…"

Without warning, I go slowly to my knees, kneeling in front of Simon. I reach for his belt and grin at the look of pure bliss on his face.

"This should do," he murmurs.

"I thought so," I agree, pulling Simons trousers and boxers. I walk my fingers up and down his legs, playing with him.

Simon's hand presses hard against my hair. "Don't toy with me!" He snaps harshly.

I bite back a laugh at his tortured expression. "Patience...It's all part of it. I'm just as experienced as you, just not with so many different partners."

Simon gives an amused sigh and his eyebrows rise. "Why didn't you ever tell me you were this... adventurous?" he questions.

"Had to leave something to the imagination."

I bow my head. Simon takes a sharp breath, and then lets out a sigh. Subconsciously, his hand goes back into my hair, doing his best to control me.

"You still are," Simon points out in a begrudging tone, his voice ragged.

I stop to look up at him, at his protesting expression. "Do you want to complain? Because I don't have to do anything..."

Simon shakes his head quickly. "By all means, continue," he says, trying his best to sound like he isn't affected. I'm not fooled for one second.

Apart from the occasional grunt of approval, Simon remains silent. It really is sad how simple it is to entertain him

When I'm done, I take Simons hand and bring myself to my feet.

"Thank you," I say again, smiling.

"I'm going to have to give you more reasons to be grateful if this is how you plan to repay me,"

Simon mutters. "Those lips of yours are quite talented."

"Oh, this won't be an everyday thing, I can assure you," I tell Simon.

He frowns. "You torture me."

I shake my head. "You're never happy, are you?"

Simon circles his arm around my waist. "Do you know what will make me even happier?"

"_Waiting," _I answer for him. "Besides, I have a favor I want to ask of you." I tilt Simon's chin upward to face me, trying to give him my best pleading face.

Simon's unperturbed. "Haven't I told you, I don't _do-_"

I roll my eyes. "That's such a lie. You've done me favors before, and I've just done one for _you._ And what was it you told me? 'No favor goes unreturned'?" I question, playing with the buckle of Simon's belt for reminder.

"You're using my own words against me," he mutters. "What is it that you want?"

I take a deep breath. "Well, you remember how you told me I could have anything I wanted from you?"

Simon nods. "Of course, I remember. Is there something you need?"

"Yes, actually, and it's rather important. But I knew you would be able to do it?"

"What is it?" Simon questions.

"Well, my family's beginning to get on really well again, and I don't want anything- or anyone- to jeopardize that. If it isn't too much to ask, could you find a way to keep Astoria away from my family? I know how you feel about her, but you know how I feel, and this is my family-"

"Consider it done," Simon tells me.

I can't help my look up surprise. "That easily? You aren't going to argue? I remember last time you said you couldn't do anything."

"You wouldn't have asked me if you knew for certain there was absolutely _nothing_ I could do," Simon reasons. He raises a fair point. "And, I'm quite sure I could pull some strings if need be."

I can't tell Simon how grateful I am. Finally, one of our problems is solved. "You won't get in any trouble, will you?"

Simon shakes his head. "As if that's a possibility. I can do what I like. And if it's what you want, then it's going to be done. I told you, you're going to have _everything."_

I smile at Simon and give him a kiss. It seems that things are finally falling into place. I hope that doesn't change.

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**(A/N: Hope you liked the chapter! Again, sorry for not updating in like a century! Please leave a review! (My birthday is Tuesday and it would make my week **** ) Love you all!**


	23. And When They Go, They're Gone

***Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling! **

***Rather surprised at how quickly I got this chapter up!  
**

***Title comes from 'Morning Song' by the Lumineers.**

_***Leave a review!**_

* * *

Ever since I've come home from Simon's, there's been this idiotic smile on my face that I can't seem to get rid of. Simon really is opening up more, and he isn't as rough as his exterior's made him seem. Better yet, being with him hasn't only made me happy, but it could possibly help my family as well. Astoria's going to be out of our lives for good. Life couldn't get any better, and I can't wait to tell my family the great news.

I turn the page of my book. I'm not exactly positive what I'm reading, because my thoughts are so thrilling that I can't entirely focus on the words. The warmth of the sun makes me want to discard my robes for a lighter set, but I can't be bothered to go back inside. I'm comfortable sitting on a stone bench in the front lawn, shaded by a tree and surrounded by the summery smell of flowers. Seeing the garden at Simon's house has encouraged me to spend time in my own. I do love my siblings, but I'm enjoying the quiet.

Slowly, I look up as I hear the tell-tale sound of apparition. My book falls from my hands. Holden is going up the walkway to the Manor. His lips are moving slightly, like he's rehearsing something. I'm frozen for a moment, in complete shock. I never thought I'd see Holden again, at least not at my _home._ This moment doesn't even seem real. I don't know what I should say to him, but I'd rather speak to Holden than have him run into Dad. I'm not exactly positive how that would go.

I clear my throat. "Holden," I call. My voice comes out as a hoarse whisper. He doesn't hear me. I try again. _"Holden."_

Hearing his name, Holden turns his head slightly. When he catches sight of me, he nearly does a double-take. His eyes widen. I don't know why he looks so surprised, because he apparently came to see me. Trembling, I beckon him over. Holden walks slowly, his back rod-straight. When he's close enough to me, I stand up.

"Wh-what are you doing here?" I ask, frowning. I'm not angry. I don't know how to feel.

Holden gives me that puppy-face he used to always give me when I was angry at him. This time, it seems more sincere. "I wanted to apologize," he tells me.

Funny, whenever I apologized to Holden, it wasn't acceptable. And now he comes to do the same thing to me?

I have no idea what to say. I don't even know if I want to accept Holden's apology. I just stare at him, my mouth gaping open. "I was an ass," Holden admits. "I shouldn't have blamed everything on you. I was- I was having a lot of problems with my parents, and I took it out on you."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I question, my face still blank of emotion. I feel as if I'm only engaging Holden so that I can keep him here a moment longer.

"I don't know. We only ever talked about _your_ problems, it was like mine weren't even important."

"That wasn't true. You could have said anything to me, and I would have listened," I tell Holden. I don't know where he ever got it in his head that he couldn't confide in me. "You didn't even try."

Holden seems to realize that for the first time. He gives a small nod of recognition. "I know. And I was wrong to be angry at you for something you didn't even know. I just wish you hadn't gone about it the way you did."

"I wish I hadn't either," I agree. Whether or not the relationship between Holden and I continued, I still regret cheating on him. "I was wrong, too. I take back what I did, but not my reasons for doing it."

"That's understandable," Holden says quietly. "Have you and Teddy talked?"

I shake my head. He doesn't need to know everything. "Not really. Have the two of you?"

"We're done for now," Holden informs me. Honestly, I didn't expect their friendship to last much longer. It's sad it was ruined, but we were all equally guilty.

An uncomfortable silence falls between Holden and I. He looks down at his shoes. "I was lying."

I glance up at him. "About what?"

"When I kept telling you I didn't love you anymore. I did- I _do. _I just- you made me so angry when I found out, and I wanted to hurt you as much as you hurt me. It was stupid, I know-"

"Y-You still love me?" I stammer, baffled. How could Holden act like he hated me so much, and really not? Who is that fair to?

Holden nods. "Yeah, I do. I love you, Belle. And I really want to start over. From the beginning."

He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear like he did the first time he kissed me. He hasn't touched me with any sort of affection for weeks. Holden's hand rests on my face as he moves in closer to me. Almost automatically, I turn my head to the side, not allowing his lips to touch mine. Afterward, I feel a terrible pulling in my stomach as if I've let go of something permanently.

I take a tentative step away from Holden and gently move his hand from my face. When I am finally able to bring myself to look at him again, I want to cry. Holden's eyes look like shattered glass.

"Belle…" his voice is full of hurt, and I'm amazed that it was my doing. Holden's hurt me many times, but I never knew I had the capability to do the same to him.

"I'm sorry," I apologize. "But I couldn't, I can't… we agreed it was over. Both of us, together. And I- I moved on, and I've been trying so hard not to think about you and everything there was between us, because it just makes things harder. Please… don't make things difficult." With each word, I feel as if I'm ripping out Holden's heart. Pieces of my heart seem to be leaving my chest as well.

Holden looks as if he's just been hit by a ton of bricks. He's stunned. "You've _moved on_?" he repeats. "You mean… there's someone else?"

I nod. "I don't expect you to be happy about it, but _I'm _happy, Holden. And if you love me, then you'd want that for me," I say calmly.

"You don't love him. Not like you love _me_," Holden says firmly.

"That isn't for you to decide." I know I'm not in love with Simon yet, but that's only because we haven't been together long enough.

Holden frowns. "Then you lied to me, too," he says flatly. I can't tell if he's upset or not.

"How did I lie to you?"

"You told me that you weren't going to stop loving me."

I cross my arms. "And you used it as an excuse for being so terrible to me. You told me you were always going to love me, too."

Holden shakes his head. "No, I didn't."

"Even if you did love me, it's not like I can read your mind." I purse my lips. "I'm happy you apologized, but I just don't want to get hurt by you again."

Holden looks appalled that I would say such a thing, as if it's coming from nowhere. "You weren't the only one that got hurt," he reminds me.

"I know that, but you can't guilt me into anything. You don't know how much hell you put me through, Holden. You really don't know. I'm not blaming you for anything I did, but you could have supported me more. I feel that you know that just as well as I do."

"I do," Holden admits, "and now you won't give me the chance."

I don't know what to say to Holden to make him understand. Is this how he felt speaking to me? "Why? So that things can go badly again? I know that you could be telling the complete and honest truth, but I just can't put myself in the situation to find out."

I move my hand to run it through my hair. Holden's hand closes tight around my wrist. He isn't being forceful, but it still catches me by surprise.

"H-Holden…" I say quietly. "I'm serious."

Holden pulls me closer to him, his hands around both my wrists now. I can't get away from him. "I love you, Belle. You love me, too. I_ know_ you do."

"Stop," I say breathlessly. "I don't… want anyone to see us. My dad- he's already upset with you," I tell Holden.

"What did you tell him?" Holden demands.

"I told him what you did," I whisper.

Holden's eyebrows furrow, and he looks angry. "Why did you say anything?"

"I didn't mean to," I assure him. "I tried to lie, but he knew. I really didn't want to say anything-"

Holden looks away for a moment, and throws a dirty glance at the Manor. "Great, give your Dad one more reason to hate me than he already has."

How can Holden possibly put this on _me_? "You would be upset too if something like that happened to your sister, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah, but this is different. Belle, I only did that stuff to you because I love you. You don't understand-"

"Am I supposed to?" I question. "You left bruises on me because you _love _me?"

I hope this sounds as stupid to Holden as it really is. "I didn't want to," Holden protests. "Belle, you made me."

What the hell? "I didn't make you do anything! There shouldn't be anything that I can say or do to make you angry enough to want to physically hurt me! What's worse, you think it's my fault, and you had me believing it, too! You don't love me, you just want to control me!"

"_Don't_ say that!" Holden snaps harshly, shaking my wrists hard enough to make my shoulders jerk. My eyes widen. I don't want to go through this again. "God, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Holden, let me go," I plead. "I'm not kidding. I'll- I'll scream…"

"Don't," Holden tells me, shaking his head quickly. "Just hear me out."

"I already have. And I've made up my mind. No matter how much you say you love me, I can't be with you. I can't be with someone I'm afraid of. I gave you the chance to have me back, and you didn't take it. I'm not giving up what I have for another chance with you. I'm sorry."

Holden doesn't seem to understand what I'm saying. "What?" He asks. "You're not…"

I shake my head and feel tears coming down my face. "I c-can't. I'm so sorry… I'm sorry, Holden, I'm-" I can't stop apologizing to Holden and I don't know why.

He lets my wrists go. My hands are trembling. Holden sighs. "I just don't know where things went wrong," he says quietly. To be honest, I'm not exactly positive either. "I hope you're happy."

I can't tell whether or not he's being sarcastic. "I-I will be."

Holden gives me a half-hearted look before turning around and disapparating.

For at least five minutes, I can't move. I just stand there with my head in my hands and cry.

Once I've finally got myself halfway together, I take off inside and slam the door. How could Holden have done that to me? How could he have just shown up without notice and expected me to take him back after her made it abundantly clear things couldn't be the other way around? How else was I supposed to answer?

Mum sticks her head out of the dining room door. She sees me before I can turn around and retreat to my room.

"Isobelle, you're just in time to join us for lunch," she calls.

"I'm not hungry," I mutter back, facing away.

"I'm not forcing you to eat. You've been on your own all day, you should at least sit with us for a short while," Mum replies.

Why can't she leave me be? "I seriously don't want-"

"I'm not_ asking_ you, Isobelle. We haven't seen you all morning."

Reluctantly, I turn around and walk slowly in the direction of the dining room. Mum gives me an uneasy smile. "Are you all right?" She questions in a low voice, looking me up and down.

I shake my head. "No."

"Has something happened?"

"No."

Mum decides not to press matters, and I'm thankful. I follow her into the dining room and sit at the far end of the table, next to Scorpius and Rose.

"Good afternoon," Dad greets me.

"Afternoon," I mumble back.

Nina smiles at me. "Did you just come from outside, Belly?" she questions. I nod. "You look sad."

"Nina, not right now," I say in much harsher a tone than I mean to. I feel terrible that I can't be bothered to apologize. My head is pounding and my encounter with Holden left me distressed and with the feeling that I need to vomit. I just want to forget it ever happened.

To make myself feel a bit better, I pour myself a glass of champagne to loosen me up. I intend for it to last much longer than it actually does. For once, I can rightfully blame something on Holden. Still feeling immensely upset, I pour myself another glass and down it. I'm not sure how long this continues, but by the time anyone notices anything, the bottle is empty and I'm reaching for another.

"Isobelle," Scorpius whispers. "You should stop."

Mum and Dad stop talking to Rose and Hugo and finally turn to look and me. "Isobelle! What has gotten _into_ you?" Mum demands, frowning at me.

I can hardly register the fact that she's speaking to me. I raise my eyebrows, or at least I think I do. "Huh?"

"Just what do you think you're doing?" I'm positive that was a different question from last time.

"Forgetting," I answer simply, putting my elbow on the table to prop my head up. It feels rather heavy.

"Forgetting what, may I ask?" That's Dad. He doesn't sound all too happy.

"Doesn't matter," I respond. Has it always been so bright in here?

"It absolutely _does_ matter, and you'll tell me this instant before I have a mind to-"

"Draco!" Mum hisses. She turns back to me with an uncomfortable look. "Isobelle, what's the matter?"

I'm surprised Mum hasn't yelled at me yet. Hugo smartly asks to be excused, and Nina gets up to follow him. Mum looks back at me. "_Isobelle."_

"I can't say," I answer, looking in the other direction.

"You'd better," Dad warns. "I don't have the patience for this sort of behavior today."

"Holden said I can't tell you anything else!" I say heatedly, slamming my glass on the table. "He's mad 'cause I told you anything at all!"

"Holden?" Mum repeats, frowning. "Isobelle, when did you speak to Holden?"

"Minutes ago. He still loves me, d'you know that? He didn't want to let me go! He came here to tell me that."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Dad demands. "I don't want him stepping _foot _on my property, and I don't want you seeing him either!"

"I wasn't!" I protest. "He just showed up and said sorry and that he loved me again then I told him I was with Simon and then he got really upset and he left."

Dad curses under his breath, and Rose gives me a disapproving look. "He didn't do anything to you, did he?" She asks.

I shake my head quickly, and it makes me terribly dizzy. "Why?"

Rose gestures her fork at me. "Well, you're sort of rubbing your wrists, and I was just wondering-"

"I'll kill him," Dad mutters, his jaw clenched tight.

"He didn't!" I snap. I know Dad knows I'm lying. My face probably doesn't look all that convincing.

"Holden has a habit for grabbing you. Well, you said he didn't want to let you go…" Scorpius adds with a smirk. I hate how funny he thinks he is.

I throw my younger brother a dirty look. "You don't know the sodding half of anything you think you do, so how about you finally shut the hell up for once and-"

"That's it, you need to go to your room," Mum decides, standing up. "Come on."

"_Why?"_

"Because you're drunk!" Scorpius responds, rolling his eyes.

"Am not. No one asked you!" When I stand up, I manage to push my chair out hard enough to knock it over, which doesn't much help my case. Rose jumps.

"We're going to speak in the morning," Dad assures me in a stiff tone. I don't think that will be a pleasant conversation.

Mum puts her hand on my shoulder to usher me out of the room. "Isobelle, _leave_ the glass on the table," she orders.

"I don't _want_ to go to my room anymore," I inform Mum. "When I wanted to, you told me no!"

"That's too bad," Dad answers for Mum. "Hermione."

"Why does everyone get to tell me what to do? You're making me go to my room; Holden says I can't not love him anymore-"

"Not another word about Holden!" Dad raises his voice. "I _said_ I will see you in the morning!

I roll my eyes. "Fine. This isn't fair."

"Neither is life."

The dining room door closes behind us. "Isobelle," Mum says in a low voice. "I thought we were past this."

"I thought Holden was past _me_."

Mum looks at me for a long while, and I just stare back at her. Suddenly, I burst into tears and turn into a sobbing mess. Mum seems to be the only person in this family who remotely understands anything. She awkwardly pats my hair, my head resting on her shoulder.

Mum doesn't say anything for a while, and then finally, she opens her mouth. "You really need to go sleep. We'll settle all this in the morning."

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The following morning, I feel extremely well-rested. I figure I must have gone to bed early, because I can't remember anything beyond late yesterday afternoon. However, I do remember speaking with Holden. I couldn't believe he had the audacity to want to work things out between us, after everything he put me through. I had no choice but to say refuse.

Mum's told me that dad wants to see me in his study. The way she said it made me feel as if I was in trouble for some reason. She's been acting rather strange around me all morning.

I reach out to knock on the door of Dad's study. "Come in," he calls.

I open the door and close it behind me. Dad glances at me briefly, then gestures for me to sit down. I take a seat in the chair on the far end of the room, near the book shelf. A sheet of parchment partly shields Dad's face, and he keeps frowning at it as if he is conflicted. Whatever it is, it can't be good.

"You wanted to speak to me?" I ask apprehensively.

Slowly, Dad nods. "I wanted to speak to you." He's sitting in front of me, but he doesn't seem _here._

"Yes, I know that. What did you want to speak to me about? Did something happen yesterday that I don't know about?" Dad nods again, then he shakes his head. "What does that mean?"

"It means that isn't important right now," Dad answers shortly.

If what he wants to tell me isn't important, why has he still called me here? "Then why am I here? And what's that letter?"

Dad sets the sheet of parchment down for the first time and rubs his temples. He always does that when he has a lot on his mind. "It's about Astoria," Dad responds flatly.

What more can Astoria possibly do to this family? My heart sinks, until I remember my conversation with Simon. "Actually, I have some good news about Astoria."

Dad's eyebrows shoot up. "Good news?" he repeats, as if this is remotely impossible. I nod.

"The other day I spoke with Simon and asked him for a favor. He's had it arranged again that Astoria can't interfere with _any_ of us again without getting in trouble. So you don't have to worry about her any longer."

I wait for Dad to smile and jump with joy. He doesn't. If anything, he seems more upset. That confuses me greatly. "What's wrong?" I ask. "Since when do you care that Astoria can't see us?"

Dad shakes his head at me. His eyes are dull. "It isn't that Astoria can't see us, it's that Scorpius can't see _her."_

Has Dad gone mad? "I thought that was what you wanted? Since when do you want Scorpius to see Astoria?"

Dad takes a deep breath and looks me straight in the eye. "Since this morning, when I found out that she may possibly die."

At first, I smile, thinking Dad's joking. My smiles fades when his expression remains grave. "_Might die?_ What are you talking about?"

Dad taps the sheet of parchment absentmindedly with his finger. "Astoria's become terribly sick. I'm not certain what with yet, but I'm sure there are a few ideas," Dad tells me. "Mrs. Zabini found out yesterday when Daphne brought her to St. Mungo's, and Blaise apparently, thought it would be an act of kindness to tell me. From what he's described, things don't at all look positive."

I'm not sure what to say. Granted, I hated Astoria immensely for the better half of my childhood. She made my life miserable and turned my entire family against me. Still, for the simple fact that she's Scorpius' mother, I never wished death on her.

"Who all knows?" I ask uncomfortably.

"The Zabinis, her family, you, and I. Isobelle, I really need you to keep this a secret," Dad tells me.

"I will," I promise right away. My body feels cold.

Dad rubs his chin. "Between you and I, from what Blaise described, I don't think Astoria will survive it. It sounds like a sickness I've heard of before, and every case I was familiar with was fatal."

I understand how much Dad dislikes Astoria, but he and I are in the same position. No matter what, she's still the mother of his son.

"Scorpius is going to hate me," I realize, putting my head in my hands.

"It isn't completely your fault," Dad assures me. "I'm sure Scorpius will find a way to blame me as well."

Whether or not, I'll know in my heart that I was responsible for such a terrible thing. "Maybe I could talk to Simon…"

Dad shakes his head dismally. "It isn't any use. If Simon's already passed an order, then there absolutely won't be any undoing it. You know that."

I do know, but the hopeful part of me wishes that Simon may make an exception in my case. The realistic side of me knows that can't happen. Because of me, Scorpius won't be allowed to contact Astoria in any way. He can't see her in the hospital, and she may die without him ever having the opportunity to say goodbye. How can I live with that?

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***(A/N: Plot twist! I hope you guys liked the chapter! You had to know Holden wasn't gone forever! Glad Belle can finally break ties, no matter how stressful it is. Throughout this story and TBAM, many of you were hoping for Astoria's death. But, when put into perspective, Scorpius is still a child, and that's still his mother, no matter how terrible she is. Had fun writing this chapter, PLEASE leave review! Thank you all my amazing readers!**


	24. He Has Me by My Heart

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

** *Tile of the chapter comes from 'Off to the Races' by Lana del Rey. That song reminds me so much of Belle and Simon it's crazy. Give it a listen!**

** *Please leave a review!**

* * *

Simon steps slowly around me, looking me up and down. He adjusts my robes slightly, and his cold fingers nearly make me shiver. He runs his fingers over the top of my chest. "I do quite like green and silver on you."

"Thank you," I say quietly, glancing at myself in the mirror. I haven't had to dress so formally for a long time. I haven't been required by Dad to go any of the Ministry functions, and nothing interesting has happened with our family. But now, Simon wants me to meet his parents and he hopes that I make an impression. He's quite on edge.

"Your hair looks nice as well," Simon adds. My hair is pinned up tightly in a few braids except for the loose curls that hang around the small of my back. "But something is missing…"

"What?" I ask, glancing down at myself. I seem to fine, I wonder what Simon thinks is wrong.

Simon reaches into his pocket as if he's rehearsed this. He pulls out a jeweled bracelet, and it matches perfectly with my dress robes. Now I know why he's told me what to wear tonight. Simon takes his hand in mine and clasps the bracelet onto my wrist. "I want you to wear this tonight."

I open my mouth apprehensively. "It's beautiful-"

"So are you," Simon interjects. He seems rather distracted.

"But…"

"But?"

"I told you I didn't want any more gifts," I remind Simon, trying not to sound ungrateful. Simon looks at me briefly, but he says nothing back. The silence makes me think of what I wanted to ask him. I take a deep breath. "I'm sorry, but may I ask you something?"

Simon glances up. "Can it wait?"

"I'd rather it not."

"Then that's too bad." I'm caught off-guard by his sudden change in attitude.

"Oh, I'm sorry," I apologize quickly, looking at my shoes. The next thing I know, Simon is tilting my chin upward and giving my lips a soft kiss, his form of an apology.

"I've enough things on my mind," he tells me gently. "I want for my parents to like you at least half as much as I do. Charm them, please."

I don't like how Simon's making it seem as if his relationship with family is riding on me. That sort of pressure is difficult to handle.

"If I can, do you think your father will change his mind?" I question.

Simon shakes his head. "I'm not positive. You know why."

"My blood?"

"Possibly. Or the fact that he only sees me as extremely immature," Simon adds.

Now, I have to admit Simon has some rather wild ways about him, but he's a very put-together man when he tries to be. "I think tonight could go well," I say, trying to be hopeful. Really, I don't know how much I believe that.

Simon checks his watch. "I suppose we should go downstairs. Here's to nothing." I take Simon's arm and he leads me to the dining room. His parents were nice enough to allow us a room to ourselves before dinner began. I think they wanted Simon to be as stressed out as he could be.

"Don't show them you're nervous," I say encouragingly, rubbing his arm.

"I'm not," Simon lies, opening the dining room door. My stomach flutters terribly. Simon's parents are seated at the far end of the table, his father at the head. Both Eric and Jane are at the table. Simon curses under his breath. I didn't know they were going to be here tonight, either.

Stiffly, Simon leads me to the table, and pulls out the chair beside him. No one says anything, and I feel four pairs of eyes watching my every single move. Simon sits down beside me.

"Good evening, all of you. Mother Father, I'd like to introduce you to Isobelle Malfoy. Isobelle, these are my parents."

"It's a great pleasure to meet you both," I greet them, forcing a smile. No one returns it. Simon's parents continue to stare me down. His mother turns to exchange a look with Jane.

"Likewise, Miss Malfoy. We're pleased to have you in our company tonight." Somehow, I don't believe that's true.

"Thank you."

Eric clears his throat. "Isobelle, I do believe you're the first woman Simon's ever brought home," he tells me.

I try to say something, but Simon's hand brushes my thigh. "I'm honored," I reply bitterly instead.

"Excluding Catherine, of course," Eric adds, his voice full of an undertone. I remember her name vaguely as being Simon's first wife. Simon's mother casts a sideways glance in my direction, curious as to how I'm going to react to this news. I have no reason to be angry.

"Yes, Simon's told me about her. It_ is_ terrible what has happened."

"You're quite used to seeing marriages end, I'm sure?" Simon's father questions.

"Father," Simon mutters.

"It's a proper question. And yes, Mr. Montague, I am. I'm sure you're aware of that. I can guarantee you, though, that both my parents are happier now, and hopefully Simon will be the same way with me."

"You're going to be married?" Jane questions, raising her eyebrows. Eric gives her a harsh look, as if he wanted to be the one to ask that question.

"We haven't made any plans for it," Simons answers quickly, before I can say 'no'.

A house-elf comes around, placing glasses of wine on the table. When it comes around to me, I shake my head politely.

"No, thank you. I'd rather have water, if I could."

"The wine's for this occasion, though," Eric assures me, drawing attention to my refusal. "I think you should have some."

"No, I don't think I should," I reply. "Honestly, water's fine." With all the stress I'm under at the moment, I couldn't trust myself with any alcohol.

"Well, that took absolutely _no_ time…" Jane mutters into her glass.

Simon's mother gasps dramatically. "Miss Malfoy, I can't help but ask…?"

I glance between Jane and Mrs. Montague, confused. Suddenly, I realize what they're hinting at, and it angers me. I'm even more upset that I can't show it. "Oh, no, of course not!"

"Isobelle isn't pregnant," Simon informs his mother, his jaw clenched tightly.

"If you and Simon _were _to marry, I'm sure that you'd be in the position for children to follow?" Mr. Montague questions, his eyes never breaking contact with me.

"I'm sure," I reply, sipping my water. "Yet, I'm much too young to want to find out."

Thankfully, our dinner is served. Hopefully that will save me from having to speak too much more.

Simon gestures his fork toward his brother. "Tell me, Eric, how are your sons doing?"

"Sons?" I repeat. I never knew Eric and Jane had children.

"Two twin boys about the age of your youngest sister," Simon tells me out of the corner of his mouth. He turns back to his brother. "Eric?"

"They're doing well, I suppose," Eric answers nonchalantly. "They haven't written recently, have they, Jane?" I wonder why he doesn't know that.

Jane shrugs, looking rather disinterested. "I don't have any reason to know. Their marks haven't come, and they haven't gotten into any trouble, I'd assume. We should write them on their birthdays," she suggests matter-of-factly. "It's coming up, I think."

"That settles that," Eric mutters, ready to drop the subject as easily as if it were the weather.

"Your sons go to boarding school?" I question.

Both Eric and Jane stare at me as if I'm trying to accuse them of something. "Of course, they do," Jane answers. "Didn't you?"

"Never. My brother and I had private tutors." Even after I left school, I simply resumed being tutored at the Manor. It was much better.

"Jane and I don't have the time to chase children around all day," Eric replies bitingly, as if my comment meant him any harm.

"We sure don't," Jane agrees. "And anyhow, their education costs the same whether or not they're at home." It disgusts me how little Eric and Jane want to do with their children. It's also surprising how normal they act like this is. I couldn't imagine my parents ever being this way.

"What is it that your husband does?" I question, turning to Eric.

"Well, he-"

Eric cuts Jane off. She seems rather upset about it, but says nothing. "I can speak for myself. I work in the Department of Mysteries. It involves a great deal of travelling." He says this in a tone that implies this is a perfect excuse for ignoring his children.

"I'm sure. I remember my father travelled quite often when I was younger as well. When he was at home, though, we always made it a point to spend time with one another. I would feel that's important."

"Do you always have such opinions, Miss Malfoy?" Mr. Montague asks me. I can tell he isn't happy and I've allowed myself to get carried away. I promised Simon I'd help him as much as I could. I don't think I'm doing a good job of that right now.

I shake my head quickly. "Not very often. Only certain subjects are important to me, but I try mostly to keep quiet about them." It sounds like a rather submissive, satisfactory answer in my head.

"I can't imagine that any of her 'opinions' would be convenient to you, Simon," Mr. Montague drawls, expecting his son to say something to agree with him.

"One-sided conversations are_ more_ of an inconvenience," Simon replies hotly. His mother frowns at him, and his demeanor changes. "Actually, so is constantly reminding Isobelle to _remain_ in her place. "I'm so taken aback at Simon's words that I can't help the affronted look on my face.

Jane smirks at me. "Just be something to look at. That's your only job," she whispers. Perhaps Jane's satisfied with something like that, but I'm not. I know that Simon's only trying to keep up appearances with his father, but he didn't have to go that far.

"Let her say what she wants. We'll only have something to fear if she has anything to say about the Ministry," Eric jokes. "It's entertaining to hear women who think they know a thing about politics."

Jane gives me a tight smile. I ignore it. "Excuse me Eric, but is sexism in the Ministry considered a political issue to you? Because I could speak a great deal about _that _right now," I suggest. "Or sexism in general, whichever you prefer." I know I shouldn't have said anything, but I can't stand it. Simon's entire family is awfully abominable.

Eric raises his eyebrows as if he's surprised that I'm addressing him. "Simon, I do believe you may want to say something to her." Simon isn't my father. I don't need him chastising me.

Simon glances upward. "Why? She's only humoring you. As if she knows _anything_ about the way the world works. Perhaps Jane should grow a sense of humor like Isobelle's. You said you wanted to be entertained."

I'm so angry at Simon that I can't stand to look at him. He's suggesting that I'm stupid, just to keep his family happy, when he knows for a fact that I'm not.

"I'm certainly entertained," Eric agrees. "A little too entertained, might I add. I don't know how you deal withher so often."

"Whether she's a foolish little girl or not, she can still file my papers," Simon reasons. "And I like to laugh just as much as you."

I sink back in my chair, in that moment losing all hopes for this dinner. Under the table, Simon tries to grasp for my hand. I pull away. "I make mistakes with it quite often, though," I inform Eric. "I'm too much of an idiot to pay any good attention. I'm surprised Simon even trusts me with such a task."

"I believe it's time for dessert," Mrs. Montague announces, ignoring my mood completely. I'm sure Simon's family wants nothing more than to see me absolutely annoyed and upset.

"You look like you want to say something," Simon tells me, giving me an apologetic look.

"If I have your permission, of course," I whisper coldly. "I wouldn't want to say anything foolish and embarrass you."

Simon purses his lips. "Go ahead. Say it."

"You came here to reconcile with your father and you haven't spoken to him once. All any of you have done is be rude to me and laugh at me. If I knew this was what I was coming for, I would have stayed at home," I tell Simon under my breath, taking care to make sure only he can hear me.

He seems to take my words into account. Simon casts a defeated glance in his father's direction. "Am I your son or not?" He questions finally.

Simon's father seems to be confused. "Of course, you're my son. What do you mean?"

Simon looks at me, then at his father again. "Excuse me, but after you die, will I _still_ be your son?"

Realization crosses Mr. Montague's face. "You want to know if I'll consider writing you back into the will."

Simon nods. "Now's as good a time as any. Where do you stand?" I can tell Simon's nervous as to what his father might say, but he won't ever say so.

Mr. Montague trains his eyes on Simon and Mrs. Montague sits even straighter in her chair. Once again, Eric and Jane seem attentive as well. "I must admit, I've thought about it some."

Simon raises his eyebrows. "And?"

"I've decided I'll wait until you're married again to give you my answer," Mr. Montague informs Simon. "After all, if you're as enthralled by Miss Malfoy as you say, that shouldn't be so far off."

I wish Simon's family would quit pressuring him into a marriage. It's only causing him to put more pressure on me. Besides, I don't think they'd be too happy if I became his wife anyway.

"I understand." Simon doesn't sound like he understands or agrees with his father's decision at all. He drops his napkin on his plate. "Dinner has been lovely, but I believe it's time Isobelle and I tell you good evening." Simon gestures for me to stand. Without hesitation, I do.

"Leaving so early?" Eric questions, satisfied as ever. "We haven't even begun an interesting conversation."

"If it couldn't be done in an hour, then I don't think a few more minutes will help," Simon says brusquely, taking my arm. "Good evening, all of you."

"It was a pleasure Meeting the both of you," I say to Mr. and Mrs. Montague. I nod in Eric and Jane's directions. "Eric, Jane."

Simon leads me out of the dining room, allowing the door to swing violently shut behind him. Immediately, I free my arm of his grasp. He puts a soundproofing charm on the door. "Isobelle, I'm sorry."

I wave my hand at him. "Don't apologize to me! I'm much too stupid to understand you!" I retort, turning away from Simon. "I don't know _anything_!"

Simon sighs. "You know I had to say those things. You know full well that I couldn't defend you. Besides, I told you not to say anything like that!"

"As if I planned on it! Regardless, you didn't have to go on and on! It seems you rather _enjoyed_ making fun of me! If I remember correctly, you defended me the first time we met your brother! What's changed? The fact that the man who's will you want to be in was sitting at the table?" Simon doesn't know how embarrassed I am. I tried my best for him, and he's completely overlooking it.

"Do you think I _enjoy_ having to lie to my family?" Simon questions.

"You could have had me fooled. Or perhaps that's only because I know _nothing_ about the world!"

"Will you stop it?" Simon raises his voice at me. It makes my blood run cold. "I regret what I said, and that's the _end_ of it! I'm not begging you to forgive me for something you _knew_ I had to do!"

I may be taking things a bit too seriously, but the way I see it, Simon's behavior toward me in public may be a sign of things to come. If he'll do this to me in front of his family, will he treat me that way toward everyone?

"Because you don't _care_! You don't care how everyone else sees me as long as I'm appealing to you! You're just as sickening as your brother!"

I turn around to stomp off, but Simon's arm wraps around my middle, coaxing me into turning around and dragging me back to him. "Get the hell off of me!"

I look up to meet Simon's fierce, stormy blue eyes. One look and I can tell he's just as angry as I am. "_No,_" is all he says.

"Let me _go!_ I'm serious!"

Simon shakes his head. "I don't care." The heels of his hands press my shoulders firmly into the wall. It hurts. Simon cranes his neck to kiss me harshly, and I do my best not to return it. I'm so angry at him right now that I can barely control myself.

I writhe away from Simon just before he tries to kiss me again. To stop him, and to show him just how angry I am, I rear my hand back and slap him across the face. Simon gives me a look of shock. Immediately he grabs hold of my sleeve. I jerk my arm back and hear the coarse rip of fabric as the sleeve of my robes tears.

"I _hate_ you right now!" I hiss.

"You've never been more attractive to me," Simon whispers gruffly, moving his hold to my upper arm and pinning me to the wall. My breathing hitches. "Kiss me."

"No."

"_Kiss_ me," Simon repeats.

"I won't." Every time I refuse, I feel myself wanting to give in to Simon more and more, but I don't feel any less angry. That scares me.

"Yes, you will." Simon cups my cheek with his hand and kisses me again. This time, begrudgingly, I reciprocate it. I clutch the front of Simon's robes, trying to keep him from getting any closer to me. It doesn't work. Simon's so much taller than me, and so much stronger. As Simon continues to kiss me, I feel the sudden urge to leave his house, just to be somewhere _else._

The next thing I know, Simon and I are in my room. I must have disapparated us both without a second thought.

Simon and I are kissing each other angrily, throwing insults, and all but tearing each other's robes to shreds. The concepts of buttons and laces have been completely forgotten.

"You sicken me," I mutter. Simon's lips leave mine as he pushes me backward onto my bed. He climbs on top of me, and I drag my fingernails across his back. Simon groans in discomfort, and I give him a wicked smile. His teeth graze along my neck, then he bites me hard. I stifle a scream.

"Two can play at this game," Simon informs me.

I wind my fingers into Simon's hair, roughly pulling him closer to me, our lips just barely touching. "I'm _not_ playing."

Simon pulls my hand from his hair, placing warm kisses up my arm. The sensation makes me shiver, and I clutch the bed sheets. "Of course, you aren't," Simon mutters sarcastically, his fingers digging into my side. It makes me cringe and want to catch my breath at the same time. I don't think he has any idea of how to be gentle.

"Is this how you treated all your other women?" I question, narrowing my eyes at Simon. "Hurting them, leaving bruises? Do you get off on that?"

"You hit me first," Simon replies. His hand trails roughly from my stomach to my thigh.

"You seemed to have liked it enough. And I didn't want you to kiss me."

"Yes you did. I saw that look in your eyes and I see it now."

I shake my head. "You made it apparent you don't see_ anything_ in me."

"You'd be stupid to think so," Simon tells me, his lips crushing against mine. I pull away.

"What a poor choice of words," I deadpan.

"If I didn't, would I be here with you right now?"

I wonder if that's a trick question. "As long as my legs opened wide enough," I murmur, turning away from Simon. He makes it his turn to pull my hair, forcing me to look at him. I give him a slow, bored gaze, waiting for him to show me that I've offended him.

"I told you that you were different!" Simon snaps, his shoulders tensing. He jerks my neck as if I'm a doll. "But if you'd rather I not treat you like it-"

"Did I hurt your feelings?" I smirk, batting my eyelashes at Simon. "I didn't mean to, I'm only a foolish little girl."

Simon's eyes flash with anger, but he decides not to give me any more satisfaction. "You're _my_ fool," he speaks into the side of my neck, tightening his grip on my hair. I want to close my eyes and enjoy it.

"How sweet of you," I throw back, not really meaning it.

Simon knows he's annoyed me. "How angry are you really?" He questions, trying to read my facial expression. "Will you be willing to _show_ me?"

I roll my eyes. "At this point, does it even really matter rather or not I'm willing?"

"I thought I'd be kind and ask," Simon replies. "Since, either way, it would be impossible for me to resist you any longer. I want to have you."

I would be lying to say that I don't want Simon as much as he wants me right now. I meet his eyes. "You'd better go ahead before I change my mind. _Apologize _to me."

* * *

A hard jab to my shoulder rouses me out of my sleep. I groan and shoo the person away with my hand. "Go away…" I mutter. I don't know what time it is, but I know it's far too early to be bothering me.

"Belly, wake up," Nina whispers, poking me continuously. "Mummy wants you downstairs. We're going to see a play today."

I wanted to go, but considering how tired I am, I'm thinking of deciding against it.

"Bel-_ly_!" Nina whines, tugging my arm. "Wake up!"

"What the hell is all that noise?" Simon complains, his voice gruff with sleep. I nearly have a heart attack when I realize that he and I fell asleep together afterwards. There's absolutely no way that I can explain this. Luckily, my blankets are covering us both.

"Who's that?" Nina questions.

"Who are _you_?" Simon retorts, giving Nina a look distaste. It seems he's about as serious as his sleep as I am. Simon rests his head on my shoulder.

Nina smiles at Simon like he's telling a joke. "I'm Belly's sister," she replies.

"Nina, go downstairs," I say quickly. "I'll be down soon."

"But who _is_ that?" Nina protests.

"Doesn't matter. Just go, please." Nina doesn't seem happy about it, but she does as I tell her.

Unfortunately, she leaves the door gaping open. "Mummy, Belly won't come downstairs! And there's some man in her bed!" She shouts.

"Shit," I curse under my breath. Simon sits up. His hair's in complete disarray. His left cheek has a bit of a rosy tint to it. I'm sure I don't look much better off. After last night, Simon and I probably look like we tried to beat each other up. "I'm sorry."

I make to stand up, holding my bed sheet over my chest. "What are you doing?" Simon demands, looking at me as if I'm insane.

"I'm going to shut the door!"

"Use your wand!"

"Do you really think I can find it right now?"

Simon knows I make a point. "You can't leave me naked in your bed!" He points out.

"It'll only take a second. Er… here." I toss the violet bathrobe by my night table in Simon's direction.

"I'm not wearing this!" He snaps.

I roll my eyes. As if he could fit into it. "I meant _cover_ yourself with it!"

Simon doesn't object. "I don't understand why you brought me to your home anyway," he grumbles.

"I don't know, we were in the heat of the moment. And besides, you didn't object!"

"I forgot you don't live own your own!" Simon replies, an edge to his voice.

I sigh. "Let's not argue."

"Fine," Simon relents, running a hand through his hair. "You know, I did rather enjoy last night..."

"Just let me shut the door."

I can't even sit up completely before Mum and Dad appear in the doorway. Just in time, I clutch the blankets to my chest and Simon wraps them around his waist as well. Articles of clothing are strewn everywhere about the floor. Mum's eyes widen. Could things get any worse?

"Oh, dear heavens," she mutters under her breath. She can't bring herself to look at me or Simon. Dad frowns at me. His expression isn't readable.

"The two of you remember Simon," I say uncomfortably, for lack of anything else.

"Good morning," Simon greets, trying to sound as casual as he can. "I'm privileged to be with your daughter."

"Indeed you are," Dad agrees, sounding like he's about to choke.

"Could you give us a moment?" I ask. My cheeks are burning with embarrassment.

"Of course," Mum says all too quickly. "Simon, you're more than welcome to join us for breakfast."

I nudge his foot from under the covers. I've had enough of family meals for the time being. "I wish I could, Mrs. Malfoy, but I suppose I've got to be in to work soon," Simon declines politely. "Thank you, though, for inviting me."

"You're welcome." Mum turns away and Dad quickly shuts the door. I sit in bed a moment, too stunned by what's just happened to move.

Simon's hand on my shoulder stirs me. "That went better than expected," he mutters, giving me a kiss good morning.

I don't know what to say. "I suppose."

Simon glances at the clock in my room. "I do seriously have to be to work in about an hour. Do you plan on coming today?" _Simon has to go to work._ That reminds of what I wanted to ask him yesterday, but never got the chance to."

I shrug. "Later, maybe. I haven't decided yet."

Taking my bathrobe with him, Simon stands up. "Do you mind if I use your shower?" He questions.

I shake my head. "Not at all."

Simon turns back around. "Do you want to join me?" He invites.

"I'll wait," I say half-heartedly, now consumed with the thought of Astoria.

Simon senses that something is bothering me. "What's the matter?"

I wave my hand. "Nothing, I'll just wait until you're out of the shower," I decide. I don't want to make Simon late for work.

Simon shrugs. "All right, but I have something to tell you as well."

I glance up at Simon. "What is it?"

Simon gives me a serious look. "I think I may have fallen in love with you last night."

* * *

***(A/N: I hope you liked the chapter! Please leave a review! I'm really starting to love Belle and Simon***


	25. Surrender Up My Heart

**J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter**

***Song Title comes from 'Lego House' by Ed Sheeran**

***Leave a review **

* * *

I sit on the edge of my bed in deep thought, my fingers folded. My robe feels heavy on my shoulders. Simon's moving around in the bathroom, and then the door opens. He's dressed in his robes from yesterday, freshly repaired, and his damp hair is combed back.

Simon wrinkles his nose. "I've never smelled so feminine in my life," he murmurs.

"Don't make such a big deal. I'm sure you've smelled like perfume before," I reply without thinking. Slowly, I turn around to see how Simon will react to my comment. He has a grave look on his face. "I'm sorry," I apologize quickly.

Simon purses his lips. "You still don't think any differently of me, do you?" He asks. I can't tell if Simon's upset or angered by what I said.

"No, it's not that. It's just… never far from my mind," I admit. "You said you loved me, but sometimes, I don't think you know what that means."

Simon crosses his arms. "How do I not?"

"You won't defend me in front of your family, you only like to buy me things, and you put me on this pedestal, yet you belittle me at the same time," I try to explain.

I can tell Simon doesn't follow me. "Excuse me?"

"Why do you love me?" I ask, changing the subject. "Honestly, can you give me one good reason?"

"Why are you so offended?" Simon questions.

"Because I _know_ how it goes! You'll say you love me for as long as it's convenient to you. But if your father won't allow you back into his will because of me, you'll let me go without a second thought!" I answer.

Simon raises his eyebrows. "Do you honestly think so?" He questions, actually seeming surprised. I nod. "Is this what you think whenever a man says he loves you?"

"Only you," I answer.

"Why?" Simon demands.

"You sleep around! And I try to act like that doesn't bother me, but it really does! Why _should_ I be any different to you? You keep saying I'm different, but I don't know _why_!" I've been with Simon a little more than two weeks and I'm already overwhelmed with the fear that he may cheat on me.

Simon rubs his jaw. "I can't explain why. But, when I look at you, I'm filled with this sudden urge to give you everything, and I have no idea as to why that is," Simon tells me.

"You're infatuated with me," I say simply.

Simon shakes his head. "I'm not a boy."

"But you've never been in love with a woman," I point out.

"I think I should be blaming _you_ for how you make me feel, not the other way around. I can't control how anyone's treated you in the past."

I frown at Simon, as if he's accusing me of something. "I know that. And I'm very flattered that you feel the way you do, but-"

"There's always a 'but' with you," Simon mutters. I give him a look.

"But think about these things: your parents don't approve of me, I can't give you a pureblooded heir, and I have no idea how to be a wife. Considering all that, do you still want to be with me?" I question.

Now that I've put things into perspective, I'm ready for Simon to decline. He doesn't seem the type to make sacrifices for others.

"My brother has two sons," Simon says instead. "And you're already the perfect wife for me," Simon assures me, sitting down beside me on my bed.

"Your first wife was more perfect than me," I say quietly.

Simon shakes his head. "If that was true, we'd still be married. I want to marry _you_," Simon reminds me, putting his fingers gently under my chin.

"Don't say that," I chide him.

"If I don't marry you, I won't marry again," Simon promises me. "Will or no will."

"Don't say that either," I whisper.

"But I mean it," Simon assures me.

"What reason would you have to give up your family for…_me?_" I question. "What have I done to make you treat me like this?" Not once had I ever flirted with Simon or given him any reason to think I was looking for a relationship between the two of us. He's making it seem as if we have this burning, inseparable love for one another, when I'm not even exactly positive how I feel.

Simon looks ahead, deep in thought. "I wouldn't say you've done anything on purpose, but watching and listening to you, the loyalty and love you have for you family- and had for McKinnon too, admitted- was rather astonishing. I suppose I wanted to be treated that way as well."

I can't help but smile. That's the most sincere thing Simon has ever said to me. "Thank you."

"I haven't ever cared really what happened to any of the women I had an interest in, but I think of you all the time," Simon continues. "It rather frightens me."

I don't deny that Simon has feelings for me, but the fact that they've grown so intense so quickly alarms me.

"Why does it frighten you?" I ask.

Simon shakes his head in thought. "I feel as if you don't think the same of me."

How can I reply to that? I take a deep breath and shrug my robe closer to myself. "I do," I assure Simon. "Really, I care for you deeply, but I just won't allow myself to rush into anything. I can't."

"Why do you believe so firmly that we're rushing things?" Simon questions.

"I believe _I_ am. Maybe you're at the place in your life where you're ready to be married again. You're older than me."

"Not by much," Simon reminds me.

"Still, you are. I don't have everything figured out like_ you_ do. I don't have a plan for my life."

"Didn't you plan on being married?" Simon questions.

I nod, and then shake my head. "I suppose I did at _some_ point in my life, but I never put much value on marriage. It wasn't important whether I was married or not."

"What do you want for yourself?" Simon asks me. I'm surprised that he's interested to hear.

Despite Simon, I shrug. "I don't really know," I admit quietly. "I've never really _had_ to know. My parents more or less approve all my major decisions."

"I would never treat you with such fragility," Simon promises me.

That means a lot to me. I really do want someone who isn't constantly suggesting to me how I should behave, or how I should pass my time, or who I should love, even.

"My parents see it necessary," I say. "They expect me to act like an adult, but whenever I try, I'm criticized for it."

"Only adults get married," Simon presses.

"Simon…"

"Isobelle, I know what it's like to be married to a woman I don't love. I wouldn't be stupid enough to make the same mistake again," Simon tells me. He does raise a fair point. "I could take you away from all your problems."

That sounds incredibly tempting. Simon _may _justbe the solution to more than one of my problems. "I can't…"

"You _can_," Simon corrects me, his hand caressing my cheek. "I want you to think for yourself. Don't let your family, or mine, or anyone else interfere. Think of yourself _only. _Do you want to marry me?"

I close my eyes and try to concentrate. I could be happy with Simon. He's been raised better than to treat me badly, and Simon really is a great man. He's respectable, has a nice paying job, and he loves me. Perhaps Simon may be a bit too secure in his gender role, but those things can be fixed. I could have a _future _with Simon.

"Yes," I whisper shakily. "I believe so."

Simon smiles at me, the first genuine smile of his I've ever seen. He kisses me deeply, and then his eyes lock with mine. "I'll take perfect care of you," Simon promises me.

"I'm going to hold you to that," I say quietly. "No other women, I mean it."

"I wouldn't dream of it." I hope that's the truth.

Simon tilts his chin to kiss me again. I pull back. "I want to wait a while," I tell Simon. "I want to wait until everyone accepts this, or as much as they can, and until we know each other fully well."

"Of course," Simon agrees reasonably. "I'd like to properly introduce myself to your parents."

"This morning was quite proper," I laugh, thinking back on it. Simon isn't amused. "Sorry. Besides, both my parents already know you."

"Still," Simon persists. "I want them to _trust_ me with you. I'm sure you told them what you thought of me before we were on pleasant terms, and I want them to know that I now love you immensely."

"Maybe I should soften the blow first," I suggest. "For my mother at least." I can imagine Mum not taking the news well.

Simon raises his eyebrows in surprise. "You're going to tell them so soon?"

"I'd like to. If you're going to keep your word, I didn't think it was important when I said anything."

"No, it doesn't matter at all," Simon says, shaking his head. "I only thought you would have wanted your ring first."

I wrinkle my eyebrows. "My- oh, I hadn't even thought of that. I'm not too concerned with it, though."

"I could have it finished by tomorrow, however you want it to look. But I'd really like to propose to you, Isobelle. The correct way. I've never gotten to do that before."

I smile at Simon. He has so much, yet so much has been taken from him at the same time. "You have to do everything by the books, don't you? If you wanted to propose to me, then why did you ask me to marry you already?"

"I wanted to know you wouldn't refuse," Simon explains. I should have known. "Where should we go tomorrow? To dinner? And you enjoy art, don't you? I could take you to a-"

"Whatever you want to take me, I'll be happy with it," I assure Simon, taking his hand in mine. He really is being so kind to me, and in all of this, I've forgotten what I really need to speak with him about.

"What's the matter? You don't look pleased," Simon notices, frowning. "Do you not want this?"

I shake my head. "No, I'm very thankful for all this, but there's something else I need to ask you."

"You can ask me anything," Simon says. "What is it?"

I take a deep breath. "I understand completely if you can't, but I need to know if there's any way you can help."

"If I can help what?"

"A few days ago, my father told me that Astoria's become really sick, and she may die. If that's the case, I want Scorpius to see her before then. He can't do that without permission from the Ministry," I explain with a pleading look.

Simon puts his hand to his chin in thought. "This is a problem," he says under his breath. "It's much easier to get a 'no-contact' order than it is to lift one. Something like that could take up to two weeks, and that's assuming everything goes perfectly according to plan."

"We won't have that long," I tell Simon. "Please, I'm not asking for me. I'm asking for my brother. He deserves to see his mother at least one more time. Say you can do _something._"

Simon's silent for a long while, and I know that isn't a good sign. "Not anything of much help, I'm afraid. All I could do for you is see about lifting it, if that will even be allowed."

I didn't really expect Simon to be able to do too much. Still, I feel as if I'm letting Scorpius down immensely. "Well, thank you for doing what you can, " I say resignedly.

Simon seems troubled by my upset. "If there was any way for me to do more, I absolutely would," he assures me.

"I understand. It's not your fault." Simon checks his watch. "You can leave if you need to. Sorry for keeping you so long."

"I thought I'd stop by my home and change my robes before going into work," Simon informs me, standing up. "I'm expecting I won't see you again today?"

I shake my head solemnly. "No, probably not."

Simon bends down to give me a kiss before disapparating.

When I'm by myself, everything settles in on me. I've just agreed to marry Simon.

* * *

Looking into my parents' faces at breakfast is rather uncomfortable. From how Rose and Scorpius are regarding me, I can tell Nina's said something to them as well.

"Good morning," I say uncomfortably.

"It is, isn't it?" Scorpius agrees, waggling his eyebrows at me. Rose rolls her eyes.

"Has Simon left?" Dad questions, not mentioning anything else.

"Only a few minutes ago. We had a long conversation," I say cautiously, not wanting to say everything at once.

"What about?" Mum questions, turning her head. "Nina, wipe your hands. Don't reach; ask Hugo to hand you a napkin." She averts her attention back to me.

I look at my entire family. Mum raises her eyebrows in interest. "Simon and I discussed getting married."

All at once, everyone turns to look at me. Rose and Mum don't seem happy.

"So soon?" Mum questions, struggling to hide her disapproval. If the way she's stabbing her food is any indication, I'd say she didn't expect to hear this from me for a long time.

"We aren't getting married very soon, I don't think. But, I suppose Simon and I are-"

"_Engaged_?" Rose demands, her jaw clenched. "You're lying! Where's your ring?"

"Simon said he's going to propose to me tomorrow. He-we just sort of talked about things today," I explain.

Mum turns to address me again. "Isobelle, I believe Simon is a nice man, but everything you told me about him is rather alarming. I don't like how many women he's been with, and I also don't like how he thinks he can buy your love," Mum tells me.

"He doesn't think that, he just likes to _show_ me that he loves me, with jewelry and things of that sort. I told him I didn't like it either. Simon knows how important it is to me that he stays faithful. He can do it," I promise Mum.

"Hermione, don't attack her. Perhaps this isn't a terrible idea," Dad says in my defense. I knew he wouldn't have a problem with it.

"Who was it that had a fit upon finding out Holden wanted to marry her?" Mum points out.

"Holden isn't nearly as mature as Simon," Dad reasons. "Simon also wouldn't be stupid enough to try anything with Isobelle. I know his family personally." Dad makes it sound like all his threats to hurt Holden are nothing compared to what he'll do to Simon if he doesn't treat me the way he should.

"How long have you been dating?" Scorpius questions. I can tell he's happy for me, but something else is bothering him.

"Not long enough to get married," Mum answers for me, frowning. I haven't seen her so upset about anything I've done in quite a long time. "Why would Simon want to marry you so quickly, Isobelle? Is there something you need to tell your father and I?"

I shake my head. There's nothing that I know of. "What do you mean?" I ask, completely oblivious.

Rose rolls her eyes. "My God…"

Mum gives me a knowing look. "What?" I ask.

"Isobelle, don't make me ask you…"

I wrinkle my eyebrows. "Ask me _what_?"

"Are you pregnant?" Mum questions, raising her voice. Even Dad seems surprised at her behavior. Mum's definitely the calmer of the two of them. "Isobelle, I'm so disappointed in you! Your father and I told you _numerous_ times to be careful-"

"Careful with what?" Nina questions.

Dad shakes his head. "Nothing."

"You're having a baby?" Hugo questions. _"Cool!"_

"Not-"

Mum won't let me speak. "I should have known you were spending so much time with Simon for a reason! There's absolutely no other reason two people get married so soon! Don't look at me like that, I can't _believe_ you right now. Draco, say something to your daughter!" She commands, talking a mile a minute.

Dad takes a deep breath and inwardly rolls his eyes. "What else is left to say? You've covered everything," he deadpans.

"Other than the fact that I'm _not_ pregnant," I add helpfully.

Hugo and Nina look a bit crestfallen.

Mum lets out a sigh of relief. Perhaps if she let me speak she wouldn't have given herself a near heart-attack. "Don't ever scare me like that again. Why else could you and Simon possibly be getting married?"

"We love each other," I answer. "Why else do people get married?"

"Don't be smart with you mother," Dad chastises me.

"I'm not. I'm just confused. Are you upset that I'm getting married, or that I'm marrying _Simon_?" I question.

"A bit of both," Mum answers. "Isobelle, you know how I feel."

I furrow my eyebrows. What happened to Mum being the accepting one? "Well, Simon says he'd like to make an effort with the two of you, so I'd like you to do the same."

"Of course, I will. But you're moving entirely too fast with Simon," Mum says. "I don't like it."

"It doesn't matter what you like," I say tightly. "And it isn't as if I'm marrying him next week."

"When _are_ you thinking of getting married?" Dad questions.

"I don't know, not very soon. If planning our wedding will be anything like yours and Mum's it won't be for a while," I answer. Their wedding was very beautiful, but I don't even dare mention Dad's wedding to Astoria. It was one of the grandest things I'd seen in my life.

"Belly, it should be on my birthday!" Nina suggests, smiling at me.

I shake my head at my youngest sister. "Sorry, but I don't think I'd like to share my anniversary with your birthday," I say gently.

"When are we going to meet Simon?" Hugo asks, looking to Mum and Dad instead of me.

"I'm not positive, but it will be soon. He had to work today," I answer.

"I met him!" Nina announces. "He was sleeping in Belly's bed!" Hugo and Scorpius share a look.

Mum gives her a silencing look. "Are you going to the Ministry today?" She asks me accusingly.

"Actually, no. Simon and I can stand to be apart if that's what you're implying," I answer bitingly. "Why can't you be more like Dad?" I never imagined I'd say that in my lifetime. Dad seems rather surprised to hear that, too.

"What are you talking about?" Mum questions.

"Why can't you just be happy for me?" I snap. "I thought you might appreciate that someone actually loves me and cares for me! Instead, you're being so negative!"

"You can't fall in love with someone over two weeks!" Mum argues.

"Well, I_ have_!" I wasn't sure that I loved Simon, but now my urge to defend him says otherwise.

Mum shakes her head vehemently. "You aren't in love with him!"

"You can't tell me who I love!" I shout.

"I _can_ tell you that you don't love Simon!"

I nod my head sarcastically. "Right, because you _know_ that for a fact! You know _everything_, don't you?"

"If your father hadn't suggested that you be interested in Simon, you wouldn't have given him so much as a second glance!"

Dad puts his hand up in defense. "Don't blame this on me."

"That isn't true! I don't love Simon because of Dad, or you, or anyone else! I love Simon because he treats me as if he actually cares about me, and he's willing to take me away from all this! How could I love anyone _more?_"

"What about a few months down the road when you discover that Simon hasn't changed at all, and he cheats on you?" Mum questions skeptically.

I groan at Mum. "People can change, you've said so yourself! I think you should know more than anyone how terrible it is to judge someone!"

"I'm not judging Simon; I just want you to be careful!"

How can she say that she isn't? She can't be serious. "You _are_ judging him! So you can understand when I'm with someone who _scares_ me, but you can't give Simon the benefit of the doubt for_ loving_ me?" I demand.

"Hermione, she has a point," Dad says helpfully.

"Draco, stay out of this!" Mum says harshly. What the hell is her problem?

I take a deep breath. "There's no need to get mad at Dad for understanding me for once. It seems no matter what I do, I can't please everyone. Maybe I should just focus on myself. If I want to marry Simon, I will, and there isn't a thing you can do about it."

Mum sighs in defeat. "You're absolutely correct, Isobelle. I suppose I'll have to allow you to make your own mistakes, won't I?"

"Marrying Simon won't be a mistake. It's as if you _want_ there to be conflict between him and I! Simon and I may have only been together for two weeks, but we a_ren't_ keeping secrets from each other!" I counter.

Mum opens her mouth to say something, and then closes it. I know I've upset her. The entire table is quiet. Sensing the tension, I drop my napkin in the middle of my plate and stand up. "Excuse me."

Mum and Dad don't say anything, but their eyes follow me out of the dining room. I'm so angry with Mum right now, I can't even believe her. Wasn't she the woman who, being a muggle-born herself, married an ex-Death Eater? She fell in love with Dad over the course of_ one_ summer, and they were married a few months later. It seems that she's forgetting all the similar choices she made and deciding only to chastise me for mine.

* * *

I feel like a stranger in Teddy's flat. I haven't visited since the day Holden caught us together, and I haven't cared to. But, I've been feeling so alone in my decision to marry Simon that I'm willing to reconcile with Teddy. I just need someone to talk to.

Teddy and I look at each other uncomfortably for a moment. He clears his throat. "Belle, I'm sorry," he apologizes.

"Don't be." Honestly, I'm past anything that Teddy and I ever did- or had- together. It was a stupid mistake, and I regret it deeply. The only benefit was that it finally got me away from Holden.

"Did you want to talk to me about something?" Teddy questions.

What am I supposed to say? 'I haven't spoken to you in a while, but I'm engaged'? I feel like that wouldn't be appropriate.

"I heard you broke up with Victoire," I blurt out. I wish I could take back what I said right afterwards.

Teddy nods solemnly. "I did."

"How did she take it?" I can imagine Victoire was absolutely devastated, but it was probably for her own good.

"Not well at all," Teddy answers, not bothering to go into detail. "It wasn't like I expected her to."

"It's understandable."

Teddy gives me that forlorn look of his. It makes me shift in my seat. "What about you? How have you been?"

"All right, I suppose," I answer slowly.

"Have you spoken to Holden?" There's a hint of hopefulness in Teddy's voice.

I shake my head. "No."

Teddy seems hurt for a second, and then quickly recovers. "Honestly, I thought the two of you would get back together," he tells me. "I guess we're both out of luck, huh?"

"Not exactly…" I start hesitantly.

Teddy raises his eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

I twist the ring on my finger and look up at Teddy. Tomorrow, I'll have a new one. "Actually, I'm engaged."

Teddy looks at me blankly, his mouth gaping open. "I'm sorry, _what_?" He asks in disbelief.

"I'm engaged," I repeat. "I'm going to get married."

"Yeah, I gathered that much. But um, who are you marrying?" Teddy asks. He doesn't seem so much as he seems uncomfortable.

"Promise you won't be upset," I implore.

Teddy nods and gives me his word. "Just tell me."

"Simon Montague."

Teddy blinks a few times and he wrings his hands. His spine goes arrow-straight. "Belle, you hate him," Teddy says in a confused voice.

"I wouldn't marry a man that I hate," I inform Teddy bitterly. "Simon and I have been together for a little while now. We love each other."

"You know what kind of an asshole Simon is. He's probably using you."

The blunt tone of Teddy's voice catches me off-guard. "What could he be possibly be using me for?" I question heatedly.

"I don't know, sex-"

"Why would you say that?" I demand. "I'm not stupid enough to fall for that. And if that _were _the case, I don't think Simon would feel the need to marry me to sleep with me."

"I was just saying," Teddy says defensively. "It's just something to think about."

"I've thought about it a lot. Teddy, you never used to speak so badly to me about my decisions," I point out.

"Yeah, well I think we can both agree that the dynamic between you and I has changed," Teddy mutters. I couldn't agree more. Teddy used to be my best friend.

"If I want to marry Simon, you should be happy for me. Part of the reason I wanted to reconcile myself with you was because I missed that," I explain.

Teddy frowns at me. "So you pretty much just wanted the make up with me for some affirmation?" Teddy questions. When he puts it like that, it makes it sound as if_ I'm_ using _him_.

"Not only that, I just miss you. And I can't speak to Holden anymore-"

"So I'm second best?" Teddy questions, crossing his arms.

"What are you talking about?"

"You don't want to speak to Holden, so you come talk to me? You know I've broken up with Victoire, and you come and tell me you're going to get _married_ to someone you used to hate!"

I don't understand why Teddy's being so childish. "My parents used to hate each other," I point out.

"Yeah, but Aunt Hermione's a lot smarter-"

"A lot smarter than _me?_ Is that what you were going to say?" I ask, my fingers gripping the armrest of Teddy's chair.

Teddy shakes his head quickly, and I know that he's lying. "No, Belle, I only meant that she thought things out a lot better before she married your dad. Don't you think it's possible you're just marrying Simon to get over Holden- or me?"

I roll my eyes. "Teddy, there was nothing between us to 'get over'. We slept together a few times, I thought I loved you, but I didn't. You were just at the right place at the right time, and I think you know that just as well as I do. I think I've come out a lot better for it, though, so thank you."

Teddy seems offended by my words. "You know, the last day I spoke to you, I really thought about some things. I honestly don't think you're as innocent in all this as you seem. Maybe you _did_ give Holden a reason to want to break up with you," Teddy shoots back, glaring at me.

I can hardly take him seriously. "What makes you think that?"

"How you're acting!"

"Please tell me, Teddy, how am I acting?"

"Like you're better than me and you can't do anything wrong! But maybe you _aren't_ acting, because at this point you seem to believe it!" Teddy answers.

"That's ridiculous. What have I done to you, Teddy, to make you _so_ angry at me?" I lean forward, awaiting Teddy's answer. "Are you really that hurt by the fact that I don't love you?"

Teddy doesn't answer. "You and Simon are perfect for each other."

"A lot better than you and I," I point out, narrowing my eyes at Teddy.

Teddy reclines in his chair. "Do you know what I think?"

"No. Tell me, please."

Teddy gives me stare that drives its way deep into my soul. "You think if you marry Simon, you'll be just as good as him, don't you? Because that's what you really want, isn't it? To be approved of? To finally be like the rest of your family?"

I shake my head. "I have no desire to be like you," I drawl.

Teddy shrugs. "That may be, but I really don't think you're all that different. You see, I think at times we both forget who should matter to us the most," he tells me nonchalantly.

I don't know how to reply to Teddy's comment, and he seems pretty satisfied with himself. He can't be correct, can he?

* * *

I glance upward as Dad walks into the library. "What are you doing?" He asks.

"I'm writing a letter to Teddy. Some words were exchanged, and I just wanted to let him know I regret them." After I came home from Teddy's I decided that I didn't want to go out with the rest of my family. Mum's terrible mood toward me and my anger at Teddy ruined things.

"The two of you got into an argument?"

I nod, setting my quill into its inkwell. I can't hold a conversation and write at the same time. "Earlier today. I thought we could fix our problems, that didn't happen. It only made things worse," I sigh.

"What were you arguing about?" Dad questions, taking a seat on the sofa opposite the desk I'm sitting at.

"The same thing as Mum and I. Do you honestly think it's such a bad idea that I marry Simon?" Hopefully Dad can be honest and give me some serious advice. It seems I'm in dire need of it at the moment.

"If Simon loves you as much as you say he does, and you don't have any doubts about his character, then marry him," Dad tells me. "Those are my thoughts."

I bite my bottom lip. "What do you mean if I don't doubt him? I'm sure you and Mum still doubt each other at times. I'm positive any couple would."

"Of course, that's true. But any doubts you have about Simon, you should be able to overlook if they don't ever change," Dad explains. "Do you understand what I'm saying?"

I nod. "Simon's proven to me how much he's changed, but everyone else seems to think differently. Are they seeing something I'm not?"

Dad shrugs. "That's difficult to say. Isobelle, I honestly believe that your mother knows you're perfectly aware of who Simon is. Her only fear is that if your relationship doesn't work out, you won't be able to bring yourself to leave him."

I want to say that isn't the truth, but I don't exactly have the best track-record against it. "Mum can't be a part of this marriage, though," I say instead.

"I think that's what frightens her. Isobelle, your mother likes to control things," Dad says.

"I had no idea," I deadpan.

I think I see the tiniest hint of a smile cross Dad's face. "I keep telling her that some things have to happen on their own whether she likes them or not, and I feel this may be one of them."

"How long do you think it's going to be until she starts speaking to me again?" I ask. Mum and I haven't shared a word since breakfast. She's made it clear she intends to keep things that way.

"I have no idea. She's brilliant at giving the cold shoulder," Dad reminds be. He's been on the receiving end of it quite a few times.

Dad doesn't talk for a short while and neither do I. Finally, I open my mouth to say something. "Marriage wasn't the only thing Simon and I talked about."

Dad seems interested to hear this. "What did he say?"

I sigh. "It isn't good. Simon's promised to do what he can, but it may take two weeks for Scorpius to be allowed to see Astoria. I told him we didn't have that long."

"We sure don't," Dad agrees solemnly.

"Have you considered saying anything to Scorpius to prepare him?" I ask.

Dad shakes his head. "I haven't wanted to do anything until it was set in stone."

"Well, what if Astoria _does_ die and he has to find out elsewhere? He'll never forgive you."

"I know, Isobelle. I worry about that, too."

"I know it won't be easy, but maybe you should tell him," I suggest. "It may be the lesser of two evils."

Dad runs his hand through his hair. He appears to be the most conflicted that I've seen him in a long while. "You may be right, Isobelle. Honestly, that's what I'm afraid of."

* * *

**(A/N: Hope you all liked the chapter! Leave a review!)**


	26. Everything You Thought You Had

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Broadripple is Burning' By Margot and the Nuclear So and So's.**

**** So, today is a very special day to me. It marks the one-year anniversary since I uploaded the first chapter of 'To Be a Malfoy'. It may seem crazy, but writing that story really has changed my life. I feel as if that story greatly improved my writing, and it opened me to a new world of amazing, supportive readers that I couldn't have possibly written any of this without. You all reading my stories is just as important as me writing them. Through writing, I've also discovered more about myself, and I've finally decided that I want to do with my life: **_**write books**__**.**_** So, thank you all for any type of feedback and support you have ever given me, and I dearly hope that it continues in the future! I love and appreciate you all :)**

***Thanks again for reading! Leave a review!**

* * *

Simon and I glance at each other for a couple quiet seconds. Since yesterday, he's officially become my fiancé. Simon did propose to me rather well, and my balcony is covered balustrade-to-balustrade with flowers to prove it.

"My mother still won't talk to me," I inform him quietly. "She doesn't want us to get married; she doesn't trust how you'll treat me."

Simon appears to be troubled by this, but he won't say so. "And your father?"

"He likes the idea of it. It's one of the few points we've ever agreed on."

Simon seems rather distracted. "I'm glad to hear it."

I tap my finger on his desk, making him turn to look at me. "I don't think I should be your intern anymore," I venture carefully, making idle motions with my quill. "It's rather… _odd_ now." I barely do any work for Simon anymore as it is. Mainly, I only hand him things or keep him company. It just doesn't seem right anymore to consider him my superior.

Simon puts his hand under his chin. "I suppose you have a point, but then I'd have to go looking for a new intern," he informs me.

I don't like the idea of that. "Not another woman," I mutter under my breath.

Simon clears his throat. "Hmm?"

"I said that I don't want you working all day closed up in an office with some other woman," I repeat, waiting for Simon to challenge me on the matter.

"Then what am I supposed to do?" Simon questions. "File my _own_ papers? Prepare myself?"

I decide not to mention that it's a possibility. "I'm not saying you _can't _have an intern. I just don't want it to be some stupid tart that's falling all over you," I reason.

Slowly, Simon looks out the window then at me, a deep frown on his face. "You don't trust me, do you?"

"I didn't say that."

"You implied it."

I take a deep breath, not in the mood to initiate an argument. I try a different route instead. "It's not that I don't trust you- things happen. I mean, you never expected to fall in love with _me_, did you?"

Simon considers this for a moment. "Would it make you more comfortable if I allowed you to choose my intern _for _me?" He questions mockingly.

I smile and nod, not showing any sign of picking up on his sarcasm. "The most comfortable."

Simon shakes his head gently. "Whatever makes you happy."

"I'm _very_ happy now," I assure Simon. I give him a teasing smirk and run my fingers up and down his arm. "I think I'll choose some old ugly woman just to torture you all day, and then you'll be even more relieved when you get to come home to me."

Simon takes my hand in his much larger one, my engagement ring pressing into his palm. "Nothing could ever make me any happier to see you," he tells me, kissing my lips gently.

"I'm going to hold you to that remark," I warn him.

"Please do."

Someone knocks at the door and Simon lets my hand go. "Come in," He calls.

"Is Belle here?" An overly-excited voice asks. I'd know it anywhere. Simon wrinkles his eyebrows.

I turn around, a confused look on my face. Dominique almost never comes to visit me at the Ministry.

"Do you know her?" Simon whispers.

"She's a friend of mine," I nod, turning back to Dom. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I'm on my break, and I had to tell you something!" She gushes excitedly. I notice the way Dominique is looking at Simon, and it rather upsets me. I try to remind myself that she doesn't know that we're together.

"Er, what is it?" I ask hesitantly.

Dominique opens her mouth to tell me, and then she reconsiders. "Do you want me to tell you now or in private?"

"Is it inappropriate?" With Dominique, you never know what you're going to get.

She shakes her head. "No, course not."

"Fine, tell me." Simon and I have a brief conversation by means of disapproving facial expressions.

"So, I was talking to Teddy the other day, you know, congratulating him on finally breaking up with Victoire and everything, then I asked him why he did it. He said he was in love with someone else, but he wouldn't tell me who."

"Pity," I mutter, not too enthusiastic to hear anything about Teddy. He still hasn't replied to my owl. Simon covertly rolls his eyes. I'm glad to know he isn't interested in Dominique.

Dominique waves her hand. "I'm not done! So I kept asking him, right, and he still wouldn't tell me. And then one thing led to another, and we got into this big argument because he just _wouldn't _tell me, and then he finally blurted it out. Guess who it is?"

I'm fully prepared for Dominique to inform me that she's now dating Teddy. I suppose he likes to keep it in the family.

"Who?" I deadpan.

"_You!"_ Dom squeals. "I mean, I knew Victoire didn't like you for a reason, but God, I didn't expect-"

Simon faces Dominique. I haven't even thought of how he must feel. "Leave my office," he commands, his face expressionless.

Dominique frowns at Simon's temperament. "What the hell?" She asks, looking at me for clarification.

I don't know how to explain this to her. "Dom, I –"

"_Leave!_" Simon repeats impatiently.

Not one to be told what to do, Dominique sticks her hands on her hips. "What are you so worked up about, Simon? I was just telling Belle-"

Simon leans forward at his desk, narrowing his eyes at Dom. "You were just telling my _fiancé _that another man loves her!" He raises his voice.

"Calm down," I tell Simon quietly. It isn't as If I have feelings for Teddy anymore. I don't know what to think of the fact that he's just let it slip to Dominique that we're to be married.

Dominique's eyes widen. "You're… you two are _engaged_?" She gasps.

Simon nods, gesturing to my left hand.

"God, look at the size of that thing! It's _huge!_" I have to admit that I have my reservations about the size of the ring as well. It isn't anything like the simple one that I asked for, and it's already gotten tangled in my hair three times since yesterday. I should have expected it, considering Simon finds it impossible to be understated about anything.

"Dom, please don't tell anyone," I ask. I love Dominique dearly, but she has a rather large mouth.

She seems more confused than anything. "I thought you and Holden-"

"We broke up," I say shortly, avoiding Simon's gaze. "I mean it, don't say anything."

"My lips are sealed," Dominique promises me. She drums her fingers uncomfortably on the door. "I guess I'll just… leave you two, then." Dom wrinkles her nose as she shuts the door behind her.

I sigh, waiting for Simon to bombard me with questions.

He looks as if he can't decide what to say first. "What did she mean, Lupin loves you?" Simon questions, his nostrils flared.

"I suppose she means that he loves me," I reply flatly.

Simon clenches his jaw. "That wasn't what I meant. _Why_ would Lupin have any reason to love you?" He rephrases.

I can't possibly go into full detail. "Teddy and I have been very close for a while. I suppose it just… happened. I don't have any feelings for him, though, I can promise you that. In fact, we aren't on very good terms with each other at the moment."

"I genuinely hope not," Simon mutters bitterly.

I cross my arms. "It doesn't feel so great, does it?" I question, tilting my head.

"What doesn't?" Simon looks as if he's only trying to humor me.

"Feeling that you have to be jealous- which, I haven't given you any reason to be," I inform him.

Simon rolls his eyes at me. "I haven't given you a reason to be jealous of me, either."

"But you've-"

Simon holds up his hand to cut me off and, I don't know why, but I stop talking. I'm rather frustrated with myself for obeying him so easily. "I'm growing immensely tired of hearing you say the same thing over and over. I know I've slept with a lot of women, and I don't need you to remind me. But in the time that we've been together, have I ever cheated on _you_?" Simon questions, his eyes boring into mine.

"I wouldn't know that, would I?" I retort.

Simon remains completely still for a moment. Then, he knocks all the papers off his desk in one swift motion. His inkwell clatters to the floor, making me jump. "I wouldn't know that you haven't cheated on _me_!"

"I haven't!"

"Do I know that for a fact?" Simon pushes his chair back with force and comes to stand in front of me. He doesn't know how to stay seated when he's upset.

"I'm telling you now! I'm not lying!" I snap, tilting my chin up to look Simon in the face.

His face is inches from mine. "All I have is your word?"

"Yes!"

"And all you have is _mine_," Simon drawls with finality.

I frown at him. "What? That's it?" I demand.

Simon nods brusquely. "Nothing more needs to be said." He turns around and glances at the flurry of papers on the ground in front of his desk as if it's more important. "Call someone to fix this. I don't like messes."

I laugh mirthlessly. Why does Simon always get to end the conversation on his own terms? "You can't be serious! I think that you're forgetting-"

At once, Simon wheels around to face me, angrier than I've seen him in a long time. "I think that _you're_ forgetting that I'm not the only one who's been unfaithful in a relationship!" He shouts.

I don't forget that one bit. I'd like to, but I can't. "Simon-"

"How can you expect your mother to accept me when _you _can't? Trust works _both_ ways!"

"I _do_ trust you!" I protest.

"No, you don't!"

I throw my hands up in frustration. "Yes, I do! And you don't' get to use my mother as an example when _both _your parents are just as horrible!"

"My parents don't _apply_ to this situation! How about you listen to what I'm saying instead of behaving like a child?" Simon suggests.

"So I'm a _child _now?" I repeat in disbelief.

Simon leans against his desk. "If the shoe fits. I'm sure more adults know to judge on present behavior rather than past. Then again, I may be wrong."

With those words, I realize how juvenile I'm being about the whole thing. Simon's right. My expression softens. "Look, I'm sorry," I apologize resignedly. "It's just hard thinking that you _honestly_ want me. I still can't believe it."

Simon wraps his arms around me in a forgiving embrace. "I understand. But don't doubt me when I haven't yet given you any reason to. That's one thing I can't stand, especially from you."

I suppose it frustrates Simon that he's constantly around people who doubt him, and I now feel obligated to not be the same way.

* * *

Sitting in the backyard with my family should feel more comfortable than it really is. Nina's sitting on my lap, talking to me and Rose idly as we watch Hugo and Scorpius throw the quaffle in the open space away from the manor. Mum and Dad are sitting beside each other in tall-backed chairs, watching them closely. All the convincing in the world won't ever persuade Mum that quidditch isn't as dangerous as she thinks.

Dad leans over to Mum. "I think Hugo would make a fair chaser," he says. "And Scorpius would be a rather talented seeker."

"Their studies are more important than quidditch," Mum reminds Dad.

Dad nods understandingly. "I realize that, but it's good to have a bit of fun."

Mum glances at me, and I know she's doing it on purpose. "I'm sure it is."

Rose nudges my arm, as if Mum's being more subtle than she really is. "Can't we talk about this?" I ask Mum finally.

"Hermione," Dad urges, telling Mum not to ignore me.

"There isn't anything to discuss. If Isobelle wants to marry Simon, then she can. She doesn't need my approval," she replies nonchalantly, smiling as Hugo waves to her.

"I_ am_ going to marry Simon. I just wish you would give him a chance." After the argument Simon and I got into, I do realize that he's right. My behavior was almost like an extension of Mum's.

"Hermione, you do owe that to Isobelle, at least," Dad agrees.

Mum doesn't respond, and I decide not to waste my breath pressing matters.

"Mummy's mad at you," Nina whispers, playing with my hair.

"I know." It seems she always is.

Scorpius flies overhead, causing Mum to have a near fit. "Boys, _not _near the house!"

"He's going to seriously get hurt one day," Rose huffs, eyeing Scorpius' flying form with distaste.

"Let's hope that's later than sooner," Dad replies. He gives me an apologetic look. I want to tell him that for once, things aren't his fault. Doesn't Mum realize that giving me a hard time isn't helping anything?

I sit in silence, not in the mood to say anything. If I knew it wouldn't make things worse, I would go inside.

Mum and Dad are immersed in conversation, Rose is reading her book, and Nina is busying herself watching Hugo and Scorpius. Would it really be that big a deal if I didn't live at home anymore? Mum and Dad have each other to talk to, and my younger siblings have each other as well. I don't have anyone my age to interact with at home, and that does make things rather dull. If I married Simon, we'd have each other.

The back door opens. "Mister Malfoy, a guest," one of our house-elves says.

"I'll see who it is," I volunteer, a bit too eagerly. I nudge Nina off my lap and stand up. "I'll be back in a moment."

Neither Mum nor Dad says anything as I walk inside. I wonder who it is. For some reason, I have the slightest feeling that Simon's come to visit me. I don't know why he would, though; we've already resolved our argument from earlier.

When I walk into the foyer, my mouth drops open. It's Daphne. Like Astoria, she hasn't aged much since I last saw her, which must have been some eight years ago. The two of them are alike in nearly every way, except Daphne's eyes are green instead of blue. Also, as personalities go, she's much worse than Astoria, something that shouldn't even be humanely possible. Her black and silver robes make her pale skin look even icier.

"Isobelle," Daphne scowls rudely, as if she isn't standing in my home right now.

"Daphne," I reply, happy that I no longer have to address her as my aunt. Having to do that nearly drove both Astoria and Daphne mad.

Words can't describe the look of distaste Daphne gives me. I'm sure she's heard countless stories of how terrible I am from her sister. To Daphne, I'm the reason her sister's life has been ruined. She always treated me as if that were the truth.

Daphne looks around, her jaw clenched tightly. Her expression seems rather upset and urgent. "Where are your father and brother?"

"I don't know if I should tell you that," I say hesitantly.

Daphne seizes the front of my robes, and I'm taken completely by surprise. "You bring them to me _now, _or I swear you'll regret it!" She hisses.

I'm confused as to why she's here, but something tells me that I should do what Daphne says. She can threaten me all she wants, but I know she won't do anything in front of Scorpius.

"Wait here," I say calmly. Daphne lets go of my robes and gives me such a threatening look that I know I have no choice other than to do what she says.

"Be quick about it!"

I hurry off, wondering what I'm getting myself into. I peer out of the glass door leading to the backyard. My family seems so happy, and I know that I'm about to ruin that.

Rose turns to look at me as I open the door. Scorpius and Hugo are now sitting beside her, drinking cold pumpkin juice. "Who was it?"

I don't answer. "Dad, Scorpius, can I see the two of you inside?" I question, trying not to show how nervous I am.

Scorpius wrinkles his eyebrows. "Why?"

"Just… please."

Dad stands up, a curious expression on his face. I give him a look to tell him not to cause any panic. He puts his hand on Scorpius' shoulder, urging him to come inside. Dad glances over his shoulder at Mum. "We'll be back in a second."

Dad shuts the door behind him. "Who's here, Isobelle?" He questions apprehensively. Still, I don't answer. "_Tell _me."

"Daphne," I whisper.

Scorpius looks up at me with confusion. "You mean _Aunt _Daphne?" he asks. I nod solemnly. "Why's Aunt Daphne here? Is my mum here, too?"

When Scorpius says that, Dad and I share a fearful glance. Now, I think I may have realized why Daphne's here.

When Scorpius sees Daphne standing in the foyer, he gives her a reserved smile. "Hi, Aunt Daphne."

Daphne doesn't say hello back. Instead, she sets Dad with a pure look of hatred. "Your mudblood wife has something to do with this, doesn't she?"

Scorpius looks uncomfortable at hearing the word. Surprisingly, Dad remains calm. "Something to do with _what,_ Daphne?"

"You know _damned _well what I'm talking about, Draco! You're so worried about pleasing your mutt of a daughter that you're letting Scorpius suffer for it! Astoria should have done away with her when she had the chance!" Daphne screams.

I'm not excited to hear what other derogatory comments might come out Daphne's mouth. She's unpleasant enough when she isn't angry.

"You're just as insane as Astoria," Dad replies.

Daphne raises her eyebrows as if she begs to differ. "I didn't marry you, did I? And I sure as hell wouldn't let some child I didn't even _want _to have run my life!"

Subtly, Dad clenches his fists.

"What's wrong?" Scorpius asks urgently.

Daphne averts her attention to Scorpius as if she's just noticed him in the room. For the first time in my life, I see a human expression on her face. She puts both her hands on Scorpius' shoulders and looks into his eyes. It's uncanny how alike Daphne and Astoria are. They both become totally different people to Scorpius than they are with me or Dad.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know how to tell you this, Scorpius," Daphne says uneasily.

"Tell me what?" Scorpius looks between the three of us, fear apparent on his face. "Aunt Daphne…"

Daphne purses her lips. "Scorpius, your mother died this morning." She speaks flatly, as if each word is causing her a great deal of trouble to speak. I suppose it would. Even though Daphne's a terrible person, she's still just lost her sister.

"Huh?" Scorpius repeats, as if he didn't register a word Daphne said.

"She's been very sick for a while, and she tried her hardest to get better, but it got the best of her."

Scorpius' face goes blank. "No," he croaks. "You're playing a joke on me… right?"

Daphne shakes her head and rubs Scorpius' shoulder comfortingly. "Believe me, she wanted _nothing _more than to see you one last time, but your father was against it," Daphne tells Scorpius, glaring daggers at Dad and me.

Scorpius turns around to face Dad, a look of pain and agony on his face. "Dad…"

"That's a_ lie_, Scorpius!" Dad says harshly.

"A lie, Draco? Tell me then, why _couldn't_ Scorpius ever come to see Astoria?" Daphne questions, waiting for an answer.

Dad grapples for an answer, but one doesn't come.

"She asked for Scorpius. Merlin _knows_ she did, and she was told that she wasn't allowed to see him by order of the Ministry of Magic. That was _your_ doing, Draco," Daphne explains.

I'm not positive what Daphne knows for sure, but she does know that either me or Dad is responsible for Scorpius not having been able to see Astoria. Dad knows it was me, but he won't let me take the fall for it. Not in front of Daphne. That just makes my guilt even worse.

Dad doesn't say anything to Daphne. Instead, he focuses his attention on Scorpius. "Scorpius, you have to believe-"

"I don't have to believe _anything_!" Scorpius shouts, his face going red. "You didn't let me see her! You didn't tell me you knew! I _hate _you!"

"Scorpius!" I cry, trying to get his attention. "It isn't our fault, we thought-"

Scorpius turns on Dad again. "Aunt Daphne's right! You do everything you can for Isobelle, and then you forget about me! Go to hell!"

Dad's shoulders stiffen, but he doesn't show any sign of anger. "Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, don't you _ever_ speak to me that way," he says quietly, his voice broken.

"I suppose now isn't a good time to tell you that Astoria wished that you'd raised him well?" Daphne questions acerbically. She scoffs."As if you could have done that."

"Did you come here just to mock me?" Dad asks in a defeated tone.

Daphne shakes her head. "Your parenting abilities are enough of a mockery. My parents have arranged for the funeral to be next week, and Scorpius _will _be there. He should still at least be able to say goodbye to his mother, since you've ruined that chance the first time."

"I want to go to your house," Scorpius tells Daphne, pleading with round grey eyes as if he's five years old again. He wipes a few stray tears with the back on his hand. I can't remember the last time I've seen Scorpius cry or even shed a tear. "I… I don't want to be here right now."

"Scorpius, no," Dad answers for him. Scorpius doesn't show any sign of hearing.

Daphne pulls Scorpius close to her. His facial expression lifts, if only by a small bit. "I'm sorry, love, I'm a bit busy today. I'm clearing out Astoria's things from her house," she informs Scorpius, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you soon."

Astoria gives both Dad and I a hateful look before disapparating.

Scorpius faces both Dad and I. "I'll never get to talk to her again and it's all your faults!" He turns to run upstairs, but I grab his arm.

"Scorpius, I'm truly sorry about Astoria, but just listen. If we'd known-"

"I don't care!" Scorpius cuts me off. "You two always wanted to keep me away from her! She probably didn't even do all those things you said she did! I hate you _both_!"

Scorpius yanks his arm free of mine and turns to run upstairs. Seconds later, his door slams loudly. I won't see Scorpius for the rest of the day.

I sigh and look at Dad. "Was this the way you wanted him to find out? You could have said something just in case."

"Isobelle, what could I have said? What could I have _possibly _said? Please tell me, because I have no idea," Dad responds sarcastically. He puts his head in his hands for a count of three.

"I'm sorry," I apologize. "Thank you for not telling Scorpius what I did."

"He's heard enough bad news for the day," Dad reasons. "I'm going to leave him be for a while."

I suppose that's a good idea. "Do you think he really hates us?" I question. Scorpius has told me he's hated me before, but never with so much force and meaning.

Dad nods. "I'd be worried if he didn't."

I don't blame Scorpius for being angry or saying any of the things that the did. Perhaps if I'd pressed Simon a bit more about things instead of worrying about a marriage, Scorpius would have been able to see Astoria. Maybe Dad could have done things differently, too. As much as I hate Daphne, she may have been making sense.

Right about now, I hate myself, too.

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**(A/N: Please leave a review! Hope this chapter was dramatic enough for you! Leave a review :) **** )**


	27. The Woman We Could Blame

***Joanne Rowling owns Harry Potter.**

***Thanks for getting to 400 reviews on this story! Stay awesome! :)**

***I uploaded the new version of ****Can't Stop Loving You**** a couple days ago. It's called ****Till the End of Time. ****Personally, I believe it's a lot better and I've become a better writer since uploading it. Check it out and let me know what you think!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Jezebel' by Iron& Wine. That song reminds me of Belle so hard!**

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* * *

Scorpius hasn't come out of his room for two days. Dad's tried to get him to talk to us, but he won't. He keeps saying that he hates Dad and I, and I feel as if he's finally gotten to the point where he means it.

"Maybe I should try and talk to him?" Mum suggests thoughtfully. She's even more worried for Scorpius than we are, and that's because she doesn't know everything that's going on.

"No," Dad answers, rubbing his chin. He looks like he hasn't slept. "It won't help anything."

Mum frowns. "I'm surprised he didn't even want to go visit Albus today with the others. Has he said what's bothering him yet?"

Dad doesn't say anything.

"Draco?" Mum questions. Dad still doesn't answer. "I know that things have been hectic lately, given everything that's going on, but Scorpius is _still_ my son."

"That's the thing," I mutter under my breath.

Mum glances in my direction. "Excuse me?" This is the first time Mum's spoken to me in days. She still isn't too happy with me.

Dad gives me a meaningful look. I can tell he doesn't want to say anything but really, he _has_ to. Mum needs to know this.

Dad takes a deep breath. "Astoria passed away a few days ago," he says gravely.

Mum glances between Dad and I. it doesn't seem to register. "Astoria… _Greengrass_?"

Dad nods stiffly. It was pretty stupid of Mum to ask. "How many people do you know named Astoria, Hermione?"

"I just didn't expect you to say something like that out of nowhere," Mum says defensively.

"It wasn't out of nowhere," I inform Mum. "Her health had been bad for a little while, she was very sick, and well, she didn't make it."

Mum clenches her jaw. For some reason, she seems angry. "The two of you _knew _about this?" She asks.

"Yes," Dad admits.

Mum slams her book shut and sets it on the end table. "The least you could have done was let Scorpius _see_ Astoria one more time! I don't care how _either _of you feel about her-"

"It wasn't that," I protest, a bit upset that Mum's automatically blaming Dad and I for something she knows nothing about.

"Then what was it?"

"Astoria wasn't _allowed _to see us," I say feebly.

"She was a few weeks ago," Mum counters accusingly. "What happened?"

I cast a sideways glance at Dad. He isn't doing anything to defend me. "Well, Astoria and Scorpius weren't getting along well anymore, so I asked Simon-"

"So you _asked _Simon?" Mum repeats mockingly. "You asked him to keep Astoria away, didn't you?"

Suddenly, I can't find any words. I nod my head in defeat. This only seems to make matters worse.

"Isobelle, Scorpius is your _brother!_ Have you forgotten that? He has every right to be angry with you, you're putting your wishes above his! And Draco, you should be ashamed of yourself for _letting_ her!" Mum argues.

Dad furrows his eyebrows. If there's one thing he can't stand, it's to be blamed for something. "Hermione, I didn't _know _Astoria was going to die! If this hadn't happened, you wouldn't have thought anything of it!"

Mum shakes her head at Dad as if to say he's dead wrong. "No, Draco, if this hadn't happened, I wouldn't have _said_ anything about it! I've thought this for a while, now. Honestly, the way you and Isobelle use and get rid of people is blatantly disgusting! You have _no_ regard for others!"

What the hell is she talking about? Mum is making herself out to be more innocent than she really is. "_What?_ I don't-"

"Let me finish!" Mum snaps. "Neither of you see people for anything other than how they can benefit you! And once you find out they can't, you get rid of them! You don't understand the concept of having compassion for other people, or doing things simply to _help_ them, and I am so entirely _fed up_ with that!"

Dad clenches his jaw. "Hermione, you aren't making any sense," he says in a rigid voice. I couldn't agree with him more.

"I'm making _perfect_ sense! Draco, you and I talked for _months_ about the dynamic of this family and lately, you've been ignoring _everything_ I ever said to you! We have five children _together_- Isobelle and Scorpius aren't just yours to allow _whatever_ you please! Since when did we agree on arranging a marriage for Scorpius? To be honest, a girl like Daisy is the _last_ thing Scorpius needs! And Simon for Isobelle? Draco, you only agree with that because of his blood and nothing more!"

I know Mum is yelling at Dad currently, but the way she constantly puts down Simon is much more than I'm willing to handle. She knows how I feel about it, and she continues to do it anyway. How hypocritical.

"I'm _sick _of you telling me how much you hate Simon! You don't even understand our relationship or what he does for me!" I argue.

"Isobelle, what _you _fail to understand is that Simon is not a pawn for you to use whenever you want something from the Ministry! I don't care _how _much you say you love him, that just isn't how things are going to work!"

Well, if that isn't the dumbest thing I've ever heard. "Why wouldn't I do that? Simon's my fiancé! That's _not _using, and I've never behaved that way toward anyone else!"

Mum crosses her arms and raises an eyebrow. "Isobelle, don't you _dare_ lie like that! What about Teddy? He has never been _anything_ less than kind to you! He's been trying so hard to apologize to you and you just won't hear it!"

"You _know_ what happened with Teddy!" I shout. "You _know_ why I don't speak to him anymore!"

Dad looks between Mum and I, completely confused. He doesn't know that I cheated on Holden with Teddy. I wish Mum would just shut her damn mouth before ad finds out something he really doesn't have to.

"Of course, I know why you don't speak to Teddy. It's because you blame _him _for what _you _did to Holden!"

How could Mum say that to me? Teddy was just as guilty as I was, and if anything he was _guiltier_. He knew how I felt about Holden, and he persisted anyway.

"He was wrong, too! I _don't_ think I should have to speak to Teddy after that! If Teddy really cared about me the way you think he does, then he wouldn't still be after me after I'm engaged! I don't _love_ Teddy! He isn't what I want! He can't-"

"He can't _what_, Isobelle? Buy you the ridiculous things Simon does? Give you what you want without a second thought? Help your self-esteem? Isobelle, no one can do that but _you_!"

My fists clench at their sides. That's a sensitive subject for me. "Stop it," I mutter. I don't want to lose it completely.

"You need nothing more than to hear the truth at this point! _Both_ of you!" Mum continues. What makes her so qualified to tell either of us the truth, as if she hasn't got any shortcomings of her own.

Dad raises his hand in a placating gesture. "Hermione, it's me your angry with, not Isobelle. Give it a rest."

Mum shakes her head. Once she's adamant about something, Mum pretty much becomes a brick wall. "Draco, don't tell me how I feel! I'm angry with you both, and you and I are definitely going to discuss this _later_. If Isobelle wants to be an adult, then she can hear what I have to say."

It's funny when Mum only wants to acknowledge my age when it works to her advantage. I'm not going for that. "I don't want to hear it."

Mum ignores me. "If you're as grown up as you say you are, then you should at least be able to take what I'm saying into consideration. It's time you quit putting everything you wanted above everyone else. I'd have assumed you'd have realized what sort of trouble that-"

"_Quit_," I say again. I feel myself growing seriously angry with Mum, so angry that it's beginning to scare me.

"Hermione," Dad says calmly.

Mum seems to just be getting started. "Isobelle, you only think of yourself. You don't mind causing problems because it isn't ever _you_ who has to deal with the consequences-"

"That's bullshit and you _know_ it!" I scream, taking a large step toward Mum. "_I_ don't ever have to deal with the consequences? Because of what I did, Scorpius fucking hates me! Because of what _I _did, Holden left me! I kept Ron being back from Rose, and I _know_ she's still upset about it! It was my fault Scorpius and Rose were even able to write to their parents! All this is_ my_ doing, and I sure as hell didn't come out any better for it! Don't tell me about not having to deal with consequences, because that's _you!_"

Dad grasps my arm, holding me back. "Don't speak to your mother like that," he says flatly. His tone makes it sound like he's beyond given up on me.

How am_ I_ in the wrong in this situation? "She's yelling at _me! _She's blaming everything wrong that happens on _me!_ Apparently, everything is my damned fault! Mum blames _me _if it rains, and she s_till_ blames me if it doesn't!"

Dad doesn't answer. Is he turning against me, too? I thought he was on my side about this, but apparently not. No one's ever on my side about_ anything_.

"Isobelle, there's no need for you to shout-"

I shake my arm out of Dad's grasp. "I understand what's happening! The two of you are plotting a_gainst_ me! You always have been! This is some sort of plan, isn't it? What are you trying to do to me? _Tell me!_" I demand, glaring at both my parents. They only stare at me blankly, as if _I'm_ the mad one.

Dad glances at the door as if he wants nothing more than to leave.

"I want an _answer_! If you're going to be against my, you can at least be honest about it!"

Mum's facial expression changes and I know that I've caught her. "No, Isobelle, that's not-"

"What are you trying to do? You're trying to make me feel bad about being with Simon, aren't you? And you _want_ Scorpius to hate me! You just want everything to go badly for me, and you _want_ me to be alone for the rest of my life! You're _punishing _me!" I scream. I don't understand why my parents are doing this to me. Why do they hate me so much?

"I told you to stop yelling at her," Dad mutters to Mum under his breath, as if I can't hear them. "See what you've done. I don't have the patience for another episode."

Mum sighs and purses her lips. "Isobelle, your father and I aren't turning against you. You simply cannot behave the way that you do, and this counts as one of those situations. Is that clear?"

Mum's calm voice is annoying the hell out of me. Just two minutes ago, she had no reservations whatsoever about yelling at me. "Just leave me alone!" I snap. "I'm going to my room!"

I turn around, and Mum makes a sound of protest.

"Hermione, just let her go," Dad says. I'm sure he's not only trying to avoid an argument, I believe he no longer cares _to_ argue with me.

I go upstairs, completely upset. Why does it seem that_ nothing's_ able to go my way? I can't even trust my own parents. Just when I think I'm doing well for myself, something bad always happens to me. I'm beginning to think that's just how things are.

I glance up as I hear footsteps coming in my direction. Mum and Dad are downstairs still, and Scorpius is in his room, isn't he? I suppose not, because I'm looking at him right now.

Scorpius and I lock eyes. His face is expressionless and it looks like he hasn't combed his hair the entire time he's been in his room. "Scorpius," I say, hoping he'll be at least _partially_ willing to speak to me. That doesn't seem to be the case. "I thought you were staying in your room?"

"I'm going outside to think," Scorpius mutters, looking past me instead of at me.

"To think about what?" I ask dumbly. I just want him to talk to me.

"What do you think?" Scorpius retorts harshly, brushing past my shoulder. "Don't talk to me."

"I'm sorry," I apologize, making Scorpius stop in his tracks. "I didn't know. I feel just as terribly as you do."

Scorpius wheels around and his face is red with anger. His grey eyes look more intense than I've ever seen them. "No, you don't! You _hated_ my mum, and that's why you and Dad did what you did! You didn't even think about me!" He growls. "No one _ever_ thinks about me!"

"Scorpius, that isn't true. We didn't _want_ you to become someone like Astoria. Scorpius, I understand that she's your mother, but-"

"But you don't care about her because she isn't _your_ Mum," Scorpius finishes angrily.

That's nowhere near the truth. Even though it didn't last long, there was a small period of time where I _did _care for Astoria and I _was_ somewhat happy to have a step-mother. Astoria ruined that, not me.

I shake my head at Scorpius. "Things happened in this family that you don't even remember. If you did, maybe you would stop being so hard on me. I thought you finally understood what Astoria was really like," I say, referring to her last visit a couple weeks ago.

Scorpius doesn't seem too happy about me pointing this out. "You still could have_ told_ me! No matter what, you and Dad were wrong! I wouldn't care if my mum was a bloody Death Eater! I'd still deserve to know her!"

"No, there are some things that you just shouldn't know for your own good!" I argue.

"That isn't fair! I deserve to know a lot more than you!" Scorpius protests, his eyes boring into mine.

"How so?"

"I act my age!" Scorpius answers. "And I don't do stupid things that cause more stress for this family than we already have! I wish you would _grow up_. I heard you yelling downstairs like you always do! I wish you would quit going around acting like you're so great, because you're not! You're a sodding basket case!"

Scorpius' words hit me like a ton of bricks. You never truly know how someone feels about you until they're angry with you.

"Scorpius, I never wanted you to feel the way you do about me. You have to believe that I've _never_ tried to do anything to hurt you. You're my little brother. There's no one on this _planet _more important to me than you," I assure him.

Scorpius brushes off my apology. "Well, you_ did_ hurt me. That's all you ever do is hurt everyone. I don't know why people still act so surprised about it."

"I don't do it on purpose! I wish I could take _everything_ back that I've done to make you hate me so much! Scorpius, you were the _last_ person I believed could ever turn against me! Maybe I don't show too often anymore, but I love you a lot!"

"You don't love anyone but yourself," Scorpius corrects me, shaking his head. "I know that now."

He presses his tongue to the inside of his cheek and glances over his shoulder. I think he's checking to make sure we're alone. When Scorpius faces me again, I can see how hurt he truly is. Everything about him looks broken, as if he wants nothing more than to fly into my arms and cling to me the way he used to when he was only five years old. No matter how much he wants to, I know he won't let himself. Things are different now.

"You can't honestly believe that. Scorpius, you _can't_," My voice is breaking, and I know by now that it sounds as if I'm pleading with Scorpius. I don't want him to turn out the way I did, or the way Dad did, and I see it happening more and more every day. Slowly, Scorpius is losing hope for everyone. He's setting himself up to belief that everyone he allows himself to be close to will end up failing him. If he doesn't stop, he won't e_ver_ be able to.

"Yes I can, and I do. You put yourself before everyone- before _me_. You weren't supposed to give up on me! You weren't supposed to ever leave me!" Scorpius reminds me harshly. I can finally see the tears pooling in his eyes. It's a pain and relief at the same time to see him showing some emotion.

"I know, Scorpius, I know. I should have been there to help you through e_verything_. But I checked out, and I'm sorry for that. I didn't even notice it happening, and if you resent me for not being the sister I could have been, I understand. I just don't want you to," I admit. It would hurt me beyond repair if anything ever happened to ruin my relationship with Scorpius permanently. I couldn't bear it. There is _nothing_ I wouldn't give to make Scorpius happy.

Scorpius' hands are shaking. "I don't want to be mad at you either, but I can't help it. Dad never listens to me anymore, and I know Mum is getting uncomfortable around me, so I thought the only person I could go to was _you._ But you turned on me, too," he says quietly.

I never knew that Scorpius' problems with Mum and Dad went beyond Astoria. I didn't know that he felt truly _detached _from them. I should have been there for him to tell me all of that. It was my job as a sister to make sure Scorpius had someone to talk to, and I failed him miserably.

"Everyone turned on me, too," I whisper, starting to cry as well. "Mum, Dad, Holden, _you._ Scorpius, somehow I think you and I let go of _each other_."

I don't know if Scorpius is taking my statement too literally, or if he's just overcome with emotion. He lunges forward and wraps his arms around me in a desperate hug. Scorpius buries his face into my robes and lets out horrible, racking sobs. I know he's been holding them in for a while, so I let him cry. Besides, he'll be less concerned with me crying as well.

I run my fingers through Scorpius' light hair. I haven't seen him behave this vulnerably for years. He hasn't been allowed to. Dad has always made Scorpius behave with such an adult exterior; it became easy to forget Scorpius is still just a little boy. Scorpius and I _both_ had to deal with situations that we couldn't have possibly been expected to handle for the age we were. Hopefully, we'll learn greatly from them in the future.

"I love you," I whisper to Scorpius, my voice still shaky. "I promise to start being there for you again, all right? You aren't alone. I don't want us to fight like this again."

Scorpius doesn't say anything. He only nods his head against my shoulder, and I take that as him agreeing with me. I kiss the top of Scorpius' head.

Scorpius' crying subsides and eventually turns into smaller sniffs. "Scorpius, look at me," I say quietly. Scorpius takes his head off my shoulder to look at me with those sad eyes of his. "I want to tell you something, and I want you to remember it."

"What is it?" Scorpius questions, frowning slightly.

"Sometimes, things _don't_ go the way we plan and people hurt us, but that doesn't mean everyone you ever meet is going to hurt you. You have to forgive people, Scorpius._ Especially _family. If you don't, you're going to find yourself so much more alone than you really have to be," I tell him seriously. I never understood that until now. It took Scorpius for me to realize that some difficult relationships really are worth saving.

"Okay," Scorpius nods. He looks rather ashamed to have been crying in front of me now. "I don't hate you really." It's sad that I can count the number of times Scorpius has said that to me.

"I know you don't."

Scorpius looks at his shoes, and I can tell he's a bit upset about his behavior. I won't hold it against him, because we both have a lot to change.

"You almost left _me, _do you remember that?" Iask after a long pause.

Scorpius shakes his head. "When did I do that?"

"It was a long time ago. Grandmother and Grandfather asked you to live with them permanently, and you said yes."

I can tell by the look on Scorpius' face that he doesn't remember a word I'm saying. "What stopped me?" he asks.

"You said you would have missed all of us," I tell Scorpius. "Me, Dad, Mum, Rose, and Hugo. Your- _Our _family."

"I would have," he realizes, thinking about it. I know I haven't exactly been there for Scorpius as much as I could have lately, but I'm still grateful to know he was at least _there._ Things could have been much different.

I give my younger brother a weak smile. "You made the right choice to stay. You're not getting away from me. You know that, right?"

Scorpius nods, and I think I can see him smiling too. "Yeah, I know. I love you, Belle."

* * *

***(A/N: Sorry for the long while it took updating. I tried to show a bit of much-needed evolution of Belle and Scorpius' character, and bring back that strong relationship they had in the first story.**

**- Sorry for the angsty chapter. I've been in the mood to write some angst lately, considering I'm in a pretty Scorpius-y mood right about now. I've been trying to write an original story –that was the **_**only**_** thing I was looking forward to doing this summer- but things just aren't working. It frustrates me to no end see all these great encouraging comments from you guys, and then when I try something on my own, it feels like I'm not living up to anyone's expectations. It just sucks to feel like you're failing at something you really enjoy and want to take seriously, and don't know why. I don't know, I'm just at a loss, I guess. Nothing seems to be working in my favor at the present. Enough of my horrible rambling…**

**~Regardless, thank you all for being lovely loyal readers and sticking with this story! Leave a review and have a great day… or night… **


	28. Now You Treat Me Like a Stranger

***SO SORRY for not updating in like a century! But, as is common to me, my laptop decide to crash (yet again). So, I had to start the chapter over from a different computer. I tried to get it up ASAP! Really hope you like it, sorry again.**

***A lot of people are asking me what they think Belle looks like. The closest human being I can find to my vision of her is Perdita Weeks as Mary Boleyn in the Tudors. Like, Perdita in general doesn't look like Belle to me, just her as Mary Boleyn does, if that makes sense!  
**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Somebody That I Used to Know' by Gotye. **

****Please leave a review! **

* * *

"Rose, it would be lovely if you just stopped complaining for once," I snap, glaring at my younger sister. "Simon's invited us to come today and whether or not you want to be here, it's rude to act like you don't."

Rose huffs and narrows her eyes at me. "You know how much I hate quidditch. _Everyone_ knows how much I hate quidditch! And it's bloody hot out!"

"Language, Rose," Dad chides. "Anyhow, it's high time you left the house."

"Fine, Dad. _Sorry_. It's hot out, and Belle made me wear these stupid robes. I don't understand why we have to look nice at a quidditch match anyway." Whether or not the occasion calls for it, it's still a good idea for Rose to brush her hair. And I do think that her green robes look nice on her. She'd much rather be in jeans, and she's making it obvious.

"Simon's father is team manager. We can't show up looking like complete rubbish," I reason. "And besides, we're going to his private box to view the match. It will be much cooler in there."

"Yeah, Rose, it's just like always. We never watch the quidditch matches _outside_," Scorpius adds, shuddering at the idea. "It's hot, and the people act so ridiculously."

Rose crosses her arms. "Still…"

"Quidditch is fun. Who doesn't like seeing the Falcons win?" Scorpius questions, bumping Rose on the shoulder. She punches him in the arm.

Hugo clears his throat. "The _Arrows _are going to win," he says proudly.

Scorpius raises a blond eyebrow. "Would you like to put some galleons on that?" He challenges.

"How many?"

"Boys, you know I don't like it when you bet," Mum sighs.

"Sorry, but the Falcons don't lose! Besides, I'd like some extra galleons," Scorpius smiles. Slowly but surely, he's been getting happier since our conversation the other day. Astoria's funeral is in a few days, and Dad's agreed to let him go. I think it's fair, but I just don't want the idea of it all to upset him again.

Nina tugs at the bottom of my robes. "Belly, there's Simon!" She points.

Sure enough, Simon is coming toward us. He looks absolutely handsome and important in his grey robes, perfect for my fiancé. If all goes well, we've decided to get married this winter, a few weeks after my birthday. Thinking about having a life of my own makes me nervous.

"Be nice, all of you," I tell my family, aiming the comment mainly at Mum and Rose.

I smile as Simon comes nearer to us. He gives me a quick kiss. Rose coughs.

"Good afternoon, Isobelle," Simon tells me, his blue eyes shining. "You look absolutely radiant."

Our eyes are connected a little too long for Mum's liking. She gives me a look. "Simon, I'd like to introduce you to my family. You know my parents, of course, and my brother Scorpius. This is my sister Rose, my brother, Hugo, and my youngest sister, Nina."

I don't think Simon's able to put their names with their faces. "It's a pleasure to meet you all."

All my siblings seem to be studying Simon at once as if he's an odd new toy for them to play with.

"Thanks for the tickets," Hugo finally say, smiling.

"You're welcome."

Nina cranes her neck to look Simon in the face. "I know you! You were in Belly's-"

"Yes, I know you, too," Simon replies quickly, sharing a look with me. Mum and Dad seem rather entertained by his embarrassment.

Nina giggles. "Can we get free tickets whenever we want now?" How incredibly rude.

"Yes, if you'd like."

"Thanks!"

Rose gives Simon a rather apathetic look. "So, you're marrying Belle, huh?" She questions.

Simon nods slowly. "Yes." I can tell he's overwhelmed by all of my siblings. I don't think he likes children much.

"You buy her really expensive jewelry. It's nice." Rose doesn't make any sort of point to hide the fact that what she's just said isn't anywhere near a compliment.

Simon frowns slightly. "Er, thank you…?"

"Rose."

Nina puts an end to the tension between Simon and Rose. Sadly, I fear she's about to create some of her own. "When you and Belly get married, you should have kids!" She suggests happily. "Don't you think so, Belly?"

Simultaneously, five pairs of eyes turn to look at me. "Um, well…I…"

Lucky for me, Nina decides to bombard Simon with yet another question. "Do you have kids?" She asks.

Simon looks as if he's about to choke. "No, I don't have any children."

"I think that's enough for questions," I say, giving my parents a pointed glance. Had they been speaking to anyone else, my parents would have already said something about how rude they're being. "I'm sure we're all looking forward to the match."

"I am. I'm ready to make some money," Scorpius says, smirking at Hugo.

Simon wrinkles his eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"Hugo and I bet on the matches," Scorpius explains. "I say that the Falcons are going to win, and Hugo thinks the Arrows will. So, I'm going to win that bet, right?"

Simon looks conflicted. I know he wants to agree that the Falcons will win the match, but he also doesn't want to look bad for discouraging Hugo.

"I suppose we'll have to see," he says finally, checking his watch. "As a matter of fact-"

"_UNCLE HARRY!"_ Nina shouts, taking off in the opposite direction.

Mum wrinkles her eyebrows. "Did she just say 'Harry'?" she questions, turning around.

Sure enough, I see the Potters making their way toward us from the other end of the stadium. Uncle Harry is holding a very excited Nina in his arms.

"Sweet!" Hugo says, running up to Lily.

I'm always happy to see the Potters. They're part of the small number of Weasleys who continued to speak to Mum after her divorce from Ron. I think she's grateful for that, too.

The smile is instantly wiped off my face when I see that Teddy is with them. Could things become any more uncomfortable? As if on cue, Simon puts his arm around my waist and possessively draws me closer to him.

"I think I have one of yours," Uncle Harry says, Nina squirming in his arms. He gives both Mum and Dad a greeting smile. I think it's always interesting to see Dad and Uncle Harry interact considering they used to hate each other.

"She needs to be put on a leash," Scorpius mutters. Dad gives him a look.

Mum smiles at Aunt Ginny. "Why didn't you tell me you all were going to be at the match today?" She questions.

"I didn't know either until this morning," Aunt Ginny answers, shrugging. "Harry surprised the kids with the tickets this morning and insisted Teddy come since he's been in a terrible mood." She talks about Teddy as if he's one of her children. He may as well be.

I chance a quick glance at Teddy. He does have a rather brooding, upset look on his face. He won't meet my eyes. I'm sure this is even more uncomfortable for him than it is for me.

"So, what are you all doing here?" Aunt Ginny asks, making conversation.

Mum purses her lips. I have the strangest feeling that I won't like her answer.

"My fiancé invited us to the match today," I answer. "Uncle Harry, Aunt Ginny, this is my fiancé, Simon Montague."

Simon extends a handshake to Uncle Harry and smiles amiably at Aunt Ginny. "It's quite a pleasure to meet you both."

"Isobelle, I didn't know you were getting married," Uncle Harry says, quickly turning his face away from Nina to prevent her from grabbing his glasses. Dad gives her a disapproving look.

Aunt Ginny shakes her head. "Neither did I!" Teddy, did you know?" she questions.

Teddy nods begrudgingly, finally looking at Simon and I. "Yeah, I did. Congratulations." He looks away again. Maybe I'm mistaken, but I think Mum gives me a look of what I'm guessing is sympathy.

Rose wrinkles her eyebrows and turns to look at me. "Belle, I thought you and Teddy-"

"Are close. Of course, I told Teddy I was getting married," I interject. I know that that was about to point out the fact that I told her Teddy and I weren't speaking. I also told Simon that Teddy and I weren't speaking. I don't need any reason for him to believe that something's going on that isn't. His fingers tense on my hip.

A horn blows, signaling a few minutes until the beginning of the match. Uncle Harry looks around, no doubt trying to keep track of his children. He sets Nina down. "Well, I suppose it's time for us to start making our way to our seats."

I want to say something to Teddy, but I know that I can't. I keep trying to catch his eye, to somehow convey to him that I_ am_ sorry, but I don't want Simon to see anything and get the wrong idea.

Finally, Teddy and I meets eyes. He has such a hurt expression on his face that it upsets me. I give him a faint smile.

Simon clears his throat, and I notice that he's looking at me. He smiles widely, but I can see in his eyes that he really doesn't have any intent to be friendly.

"Actually, Mr. Potter, I've invited Isobelle and her family to view the match from my private box. It would honor me if your family were to come as well."

I feel as I've just been slapped across the face. I can't help but turn to Simon, absolutely bewildered. "Simon, don't impose. I'm sure they've already paid for their tickets and-"

Simon waves his hand. "I could refund you in full, if you'd like. It's up to you, Mr. Potter."

"Simon that's very kind of you to offer," Aunt Ginny says hesitantly. I'm waiting- and desperately hoping- for her to refuse.

"It's no matter," Simon assures Aunt Ginny. "Any family of Isobelle's is family of mine. Including you, Mr. Lupin."

I want to scream at Simon for how rude and unfair he's being. Why would he put Teddy and I in a room together given everything that's going on? Why does he have so much against Teddy?

At some point, Lily, Albus, and James, must have heard in on Simon's invitation. I've never seen them look so sweet and innocent, except for Al.

"Please, can we, Mum?" Lily questions.

Aunt Ginny and Uncle Harry share a look. They must realize that saying no will put them in the position to deal with seven angry children, which is more trouble than it's worth. Uncle Harry sighs. "I suppose…"

"Yes!" The children cheer excitedly.

"What do you say?" Aunt Ginny prompts, giving a very motherly look to her three children.

"Thank you!" they chorus.

Simon grins. Funny, he didn't seem this happy around my siblings. "You're quite welcome."

Teddy looks as if he's seriously contemplating the idea of turning and running away. At that moment, Nina decides to slip her hand into his, sticking him with us.

"Teddy, can you turn your hair pink?" she questions. She's absolutely enthralled with the idea of Teddy being a metamorphagus.

"Maybe later," he mutters.

Simon seems rather satisfied with himself. "We wouldn't want to be late for the match. Now, if you'd all follow me."

As soon as my back is turned, I give Simon a disgusted look.

"Is something wrong?" he questions innocently.

"You know _exactly_ what's wrong!" I whisper angrily. "How _could _you?"

"You said you wanted me to get to know your family better. What better way?" Simon retorts, using my words against me.

"Don't turn this around on _me!_ You're just showing off to make Teddy feel inferior!" I turn around slowly, making sure that none of the others can hear us. If they can, they don't show any sign of it. I meet eyes with Mum, and the look in her eyes is clear. _This isn't going to end well. _

Not wanting anymore negativity, I turn back around. Simon places a kiss on my temple. "I love you, Mrs. Montague," he mutters huskily into my ear. It sends a chill down my spine.

"Don't call me that," I snap.

Simon doesn't say anything more to me as he opens the stadium door. He pulls a key from his robes, opening another door. The far side of the room doesn't have a wall, but is instead a floor-to-ceiling window. The players are on the opposite side, circled up to being. We're perfectly level with their main area of play.

"This is so cool!" Lily says excitedly, pressing her nose to the window. Her brothers look just as awed as her. That's one large difference between Uncle Harry and Dad. Even though he and Aunt Ginny are pretty wealthy, he prefers for his children to have as normal lives as possible. Dad doesn't agree with that.

Nina lets go of Teddy's hand and scurries up to the window. "I can't see!" She complains, trying to push Scorpius aside.

"Too bad, gnome!" He laughs.

"Scorpius, that's mean," Albus says quietly. Have I ever mentioned that he's my favorite Potter?

Hugo steps aside to let Nina stand in front of him. "Can you see better now?"

Nina smiles and nods. "Thanks, Hugo!"

Simon nudges my shoulder. I brace myself for him to make another stupid comment.

"_Yes?"_ I ask bitterly.

Simon wrinkles his eyebrows slightly, as if he doesn't have the slightest idea why I'm upset. He decides it isn't worth it to act like he knows. "I'm going to go talk business with your father and Mr. Potter."

"Fine." Simon turns and walks away.

I sigh. He's being terribly arrogant, and I can't stand it.

I'm brought out of mood by the sight of the quidditch players flying past the window.

"Come on, come on, come on… fly faster," Scorpius mutters, his eyes glued to the window.

"Going for the Falcons?" James questions.

"Of course," Scorpius answers. "They're going to win, I've got galleons on it."

Well, at least the children seem happy and entertained. Mum and Aunt Ginny are sitting at a table, smiling and talking animatedly about something. As Simon said, he, Dad, and Mr. Potter are most likely discussing some extremely insignificant occurrence at the Ministry that they don't even have the power to change.

The only person who looks as unhappy as me is Teddy. Slowly, I make my way over and sit in the chair opposite him. Teddy and I glance at each other for a painfully long minute.

"Did you get my owl?" I question, searching Teddy's face for some sort of expression.

I know he doesn't want to talk to me, and I don't blame him. Still, I hope that he will say something. "Yes," he nods slightly.

"I'm sorry," I apologize. "For _everything_."

"None of it was your fault, remember?" Teddy reminds me stiffly.

I didn't expect him to forgive me so easily. "I was wrong, and I was being immature. What happened between us _was_ my fault, I admit that. Refusing to do so really ruined a good friendship," I say wistfully.

When I say the word 'friendship', it looks as if Teddy's hurt by it. "Yeah, it did."

Teddy's trying to shut me down, but I can't keep all this on my conscience. It's been eating at me for days. "You were there for me when no one else in my family was. You always have been. I can't forget that, Teddy," I say.

"You act like you can," Teddy says back.

I want to argue with him, but he's right. "I was horrible to you. I realize that now."

"Now that you're angry with Simon?" Teddy asks. How can he tell? I open my mouth to ask, but Teddy cuts me off. "Belle, I _know _you. I can tell when you're upset."

"I'm not apologizing because of Simon," I assure him. "I'm apologizing because I miss our friendship. I miss always having someone to talk to and make me feel as if things can get better. You don't know how powerful that is."

"I do. That's why I wouldn't marry anyone who _didn't_ make me feel that way," Teddy says in an accusing tone.

I glance at Simon. His back is turned to me, and I can only catch parts of his conversation. He's talking to Uncle Harry about how his father is the manager for the Falcons, and he's been left in charge of things for the day.

I turn back to Teddy. "You don't know anything about Simon and I, and that's not what I want to talk about. I want to talk about _us._"

"You made it pretty clear there _wasn't_ an 'us'," Teddy says dejectedly.

I know it hurts him that I don't want to return his feelings. It makes me feel terrible, too. "Why me, Teddy? After all this time, after how much I've hurt you, why can't you let go?" I ask desperately. I know this isn't the time nor place to have this conversation, but I _have_ to know Teddy's answer.

He runs his hand through his turquoise hair and looks away for a moment. "I don't know," he admits. "But it doesn't matter. You want something different."

"What is that?" I ask.

"You want all _this_," Teddy questions, gesturing around to room with one hand. He then sets eyes on my engagement ring.

I'm hurt that Teddy thinks I'm so superficial. I'm not, I just don't know anything different. "You mean this lifestyle? Teddy, how I live isn't going to change whether or not I marry Simon. I love him, _not_ his money."

"And he loves you, too?" Teddy questions.

I think it's rude for him to ask me something like that. Regardless, I answer. "Yes, he does love me. No matter what you think of Simon, he's different from his family. " _Whether he's being a pompous ass at the moment or not…_

"Just like you, right?" Teddy asks. I don't know what to say. Teddy truly has stopped believing in me. How can he love me, yet act like he's so disgusted with me at the same time?

"Are you really even happy?" Teddy questions, looking deep into my eyes. I remember when he said they reminded him of his mum's. I bet he wishes he could take that back now.

"You shouldn't ask me that," I say uncomfortably.

Teddy ignores me. "_Are_ you?"

Why shouldn't I be happy? I have a family who loves me, and I'm getting married. Or am I oversimplifying things?"

"No," I say, "I'm not happy."

Teddy looks as if he didn't expect me to confess. "Why aren't you happy?" He questions.

"Because things are ruined between us. I want to change that, but I can't," I say with defeat. "Teddy, you don't understand how much I need you. I didn't understand either. But now, I really am alone. I don't have anyone to talk to who truly _understands._ That person was always you."

I reach out and gently take Teddy's hand in mine. He quickly looks to make sure Simon isn't watching. It's only a friendly gesture, but I suppose it's better that he doesn't see.

I can see the regret in Teddy's eyes. "You don't need me," he says, shaking his head.

I squeeze Teddy's hand. "If it weren't for you, I wouldn't be here, Teddy. You saved my life," I remind him. "More than once. You made me feel important again. "

"A lot of good that did me," he mutters. I hope it isn't teasing Teddy to tell him how important he is to me. I just want him to know.

"Do you forgive me?" I blurt out.

"For what?" Teddy asks.

"For ruining things. Between us, between you and Holden, between you and Victoire…?" The list could go on.

Teddy doesn't say anything for a while. He nods. "I'd give up _all_ those people all over again for you," he tells me.

I can barely help the strangled sound that comes from my lips. I feel like such a terrible person. Maybe if I hadn't blamed Holden breaking up with me on Teddy, maybe things _would _have ended differently. Now, I don't think I'll ever know.

"_WHAT IN MERLIN'S NAME? YOU CALL THAT A PASS?"_ Scorpius shouts, beating his hand on the glass so hard that I jump. It's a good thing the glass can't break. One of the players gives Scorpius a confused look before flying off. James and Hugo laugh.

I'm rather thankful for the distraction. Seeing my siblings and cousins- with the exception of Scorpius- happier makes me feel slightly better. Even Rose seems to be enjoying herself talking to Albus. He's much kinder about explaining quidditch to her than Scorpius.

Simon looks in my direction, and I immediately let go of Teddy's hand. He says a few quick parting words to Uncle Harry and Dad before making his way over to me.

Simon sits down in the chair beside me, setting Teddy with a cold stare. "Simon," I say. "Are you done talking to-"

Before I can finish speaking, Simon's lips are on mine, giving me an intoxicating kiss. I pull away.

"Not in front of everyone," I whisper to Simon, showing no sign that I know he's only being affectionate to me to annoy Teddy.

"You know I can't resist you," Simon tells me, trying to kiss me again.

"Well, you're going to have to try for the time being." The way Simon is behaving and the conversation I just had with Teddy are definitely complicating things.

Realizing that I'm not happy, Simon decides to talk to Teddy instead. "Enjoying yourself, Lupin?" he questions smugly.

"The match is all right. Thanks for inviting me," Teddy replies, refusing to be intimidated by Simon. I hide a small smile.

"I wasn't talking about the quidditch match. I was talking about you holding hands with my fiancé," Simon says bluntly, an edge to his voice. "I trust you're enjoying Isobelle's company _more _than the quidditch match?"

"You aren't being a very good host," I inform Simon rigidly.

Simon takes my hand in his, bringing my knuckles to his lips. "My apologies, love. You, too, Lupin. Perhaps we should get to know each other better? Isobelle's told me quite a lot about you, and I'd like to hear some of it for myself."

Teddy doesn't seem interested in taking Simon up on his offer. "I know you well enough, thanks."

Simon pretends to be disappointed at Teddy's reluctance. "We haven't spoken in _years_. I'm afraid we now only know each other _through_ Isobelle."

I'm taken aback by Simon's comment. Teddy and I look at each other, and it's then that he realizes that I've told Simon everything that's happened between Teddy and me. I didn't think that was a bad idea until now.

"I can't believe how rude you're being!" I tell Simon, knowing Teddy's thinking the same thing as me. "I'm not comfortable that you're treating my friend this way."

Simon leans so close to me that his lips brush my ear. Teddy pretends to suddenly be interested in the quidditch match. "_I'm_ not comfortable with the feeling that there is something going on that I don't know about," he counters. "You told me you and Lupin weren't friends, or _anything_ for that matter."

"We reconciled," I say through clenched teeth. "I can have male friends."

"Yet I can't have friends of my own?"

"You share your bed with _your _friends," I remind Simon.

Simon leans back in his chair and considers me for a moment. He gives Teddy a tight smile. "Excuse me, Lupin, but I'd like to have a word with Isobelle _outside_." Simon stands up and extends his hand to me. "Will you come outside a moment?"

I'm not in any mood to argue with Simon, but I know that if I don't go with him, things will just get infinitely worse. I stand and accept Simon's hand. "We'll be back in a minute," I promise Teddy.

Teddy doesn't say anything. He just gives me a look similar to when I used to have private discussions with Holden. I'm not in any way afraid of Simon, though. Mum looks up from her conversation with Aunt Ginny and gives me a worried look. I try to let her know that things are all right. She doesn't seem convinced.

Simon shuts the door behind us. I glare at him, unable to decide what I want to say first.

Simon thinks of something to say before I do. "I want to hear the truth about you and Lupin," he demands. "_Now."_

I cross my arms. "Firstly, not even my father speaks to me that way, so you aren't going to. And second, I already _told _you the truth."

Simon nods slowly. "I wasn't aware that your version of the truth involved you and Lupin making eyes at each other."

"We weren't! We were _talking!_ Perhaps we wouldn't have had that chance if you were more concerned with treating me like your fiancé instead of just showing off! You're acting _exactly_ like the sort of man I didn't want you to be!"

Simon comes closer to me. "Me? I can't even turn my _back_ without you flirting with Lupin! That isn't how you speak to a man you aren't on good terms with!"

"You made it plain you didn't know how to speak to him either! Your behavior was _appalling!_ I thought that you changed! Or was that just bullshit you were going to play along with until I agreed to marry you?"

"I _have_ changed!" Simon protests, his eyes flashing indignantly. "Had you been my first wife, I wouldn't have given a damn _who_ you were talking to or _what _you were doing! But, I'll be _damned_ if I stand idly by and let another man treat you that way!"

"Are you really that jealous that you won't let anyone else _care_ about me?" I question. "Quit being so damned proud and just admit it, already!"

Simon's face flushes. "I'm not discussing this right now." He turns around to go back.

I put my hand on Simon's shoulder to stop him. "Don't walk away from me! If you can accuse me of things, then I can do the same! Admit that you're jealous of Teddy! No matter how much money you have, or how much better than him you act, that doesn't make me any happier! It just makes things _worse!"_ I inform him.

Simon clenches his jaw, and I can tell that he's coming dangerously close to snapping. "How the hell do you think it makes me feel to see you and Lupin looking at each other that way? You've _never_ looked at me that way!" Simon points out. _He really is jealous…_

Perhaps I look at Teddy that because he's actually willing to make _sacrifices_ for me. Simon says he will, but so far I haven't seen too many.

"I'm not marrying Teddy, I'm marrying _you!"_ I remind Simon, clutching the front of his robes and forcing him to look me in the eye. "Quit hiding behind your money and admit that you're human! People get jealous, but that's _life! _Sometimes we do things we wish we hadn't, or we push away people who really care for us, and sometimes you can't fix it completely! No matter how rich you are, you_ can't_ avoid it!"

Simon seems to be looking through me rather than at me. "Are you talking about you and me? Or you and_ Lupin_?"

"Which one of you am I marrying?" I question. "I'm talking about _you_."

"Let's not act like naïve little children. Marriages and feelings aren't related."

I know that Simon doesn't believe that completely. If he did, he wouldn't have ever felt the need to marry me.

"Sometimes they _are!_ Believing that doesn't make you naïve! Maybe you need to believe in_ something_ after all we've been through together! I can't just give up- Teddy, I_ love_ you!" I cry desperately. "Why don't you understand that?"

Simon removes my hands from his robes, a look of near-hatred on his face. "I understand perfectly," he snarls.

Why does he seem so upset? I reach for his hand, but he snatches it away. "You do? Wonderful, then how about we just put all this to rest? We're getting married, we don't want to ruin that."

"There's no way in hell I'm marrying you anymore!" Simon snaps, backing away from me like I'm some monster.

My eyebrows wrinkle. Is he really going to let one argument ruin things? "_What?_ Why not? It isn't like we've never argued before, and this won't be the last time. You can't just break things off over an argument."

Simon narrows his eyes at me. "I can when you tell me plain and clear that you don't _love_ me! What else would you expect me to do, after everything I've given you?"

Simon's acting like an idiot. I put my hands on my hips. Where is all this coming from? I told him that he couldn't give up on me. I'm on _his_ side. "When the hell did I ever say…" Suddenly, it dawns on me. "Oh, Merlin. No, Simon, you don't understand. I didn't mean-"

"Yes, you did. And honestly, I don't give a damn. I'm not allowing myself to be hurt by some half-blooded whore," he drawls, as if it nothing would please him more than to hurt my feelings.

"How can you call me that?" I question, nearly beside myself.

"How can you say that you love Lupin?" Simon demands. He doesn't even give me time to explain myself. "Most likely, I should be_ thanking_ you. Your confession probably just saved me a great amount of unnecessary trouble from my family. Perhaps ridding myself of you will be one step toward them finally accepting me."

"You said you loved me," I say quietly, my lip trembling.

"You said _otherwise_ yourself," Simon retorts. "Keep your engagement ring, I don't care. Just know that you aren't getting another ring for me."

"Simon-"

"This conversation is over. Now, I'm not immature enough to cause a scene. I won't act any differently around your family for the remainder of the match, and I expect you to do the same. Afterwards, though, I don't expect to hear from you ever again. You and Lupin enjoy your lives together." Simon's voice has no emotion in it whatsoever. _He's serious._

How can one accidental sentence change the course of my life so much? Not five minutes ago, I was still marrying Simon. I was conflicted over my relationship with Teddy, but I'm not sure I would have intentionally given up everything for him just because he was willing to do the same for me. In reality, though, I _have_ lost nearly everyone except for Teddy. This realization causes part of me to think that maybe my confession _wasn't_ all that accidental.

* * *

***(A/N: Hope you guys liked the Belle/Teddy reconciliation. It just broke my heart when they were apart. Do you think they're going to be end game! Let me know what you thought of the chapter! Leave a review!**


	29. You Couldn't Stop If You Tried

***The beautifully talented Jo Rowling owns Harry Potter!  
*Last week, I was encouraged to enter two short story writing competitions. I won't get the results back from either around fall, so hopefully I can let you guys know how I did. It's very nerve-wracking to have any of my actual writing **_**out there**_**, like, with my actual **_**name **_**attached to it! However, it is thrilling at the same time, and I wouldn't have been confident enough to do it without any of you! **

**-Speaking of which, if any of you know of any other places I could possibly get my writing out, **_**PLEASE DO NOT HESITATE TO LET ME KNOW! **_ **Thank you in advance!**

***Recently, I made a Tumblr page that I'm thinking of sharing with you guys, maybe posting some writing on it and taking requests on what to write if you want. How does that sound?**

********_**SORRY**_** for all the rambly- rambles. I had a lot to say this time around. Title of the chapter comes from 'Beneath Your Beautiful' by Emeli Sande and Labyrinth. Lovesss it!**

****Thanks for being awesome and reading! Leave a review! **

* * *

The Falcons lost the quidditch match. For Scorpius, this was the worst news he could have possibly heard. For Hugo, it meant another amount of galleons he could add to his stash. For me, nothing could have compared to what happened between Simon and I. Just two days ago, everything was perfect and we were going to be married. I couldn't have been happier. As usual, I did something stupid to ruin that. I didn't even _mean_ to say that I loved Teddy. It just came out. Simon had made me so angry, and Teddy and I were finally getting along and all of that confused me. I regretted it as soon as I said it. I just wished Simon would have listened to me instead of getting angry and practically ignoring me the rest of the afternoon. It was as if we didn't even know each other. I couldn't have been more hurt.

Why did I even say that I loved Teddy? Granted, Teddy and I were very close, and we did some things we shouldn't have, but that still shouldn't have warranted any sort of feelings between us, especially not from my end. But Teddy was right about what he said. I shouldn't marry anyone who doesn't understand me. But, Simon_ does _understand me. He doesn't always have to say so, I just know it. I wouldn't have agreed to marry him if I didn't truly care for him. Despite what Teddy believes, I'm not interested in Simon for his money. I'm interested in his heart, which can be just as kind as Teddy's.

Maybe if Teddy really cared about how I felt, he wouldn't have said all those things to put Simon down. If I loved Simon, he should approve whether or not they got along. I'm not excusing Simon's behavior, because he was equally rude, but I just don't know what to say. Hopefully Teddy will know. I just need someone to speak to. I don't have anyone else.

"Teddy!" I call, desperately knocking on his door. "Are you there?" I should have apparated.

I hear Teddy's footsteps coming to the door. He answers the door with a confused expression as if he didn't expect to see me for a while. It's pretty late in the afternoon, and I've very rudely showed up unannounced. But this is _Teddy._ He won't refuse me, he can't.

Teddy bites his lower lip. "Belle, are you all right?" He asks carefully.

I open my mouth to say something, but I can't think of what. There's _too_ much to say, too much that has to deal with him.

"Belle? Isobelle?"

"I messed up," I say quietly, so that Teddy can barely hear me.

"What do you mean?" Teddy asks. "Come in."

Teddy shuts the door softly behind him. He turns to look at me and her eyebrows knit together. "You look like you didn't sleep at all last night."

He's probably right. I couldn't be bothered to do my hair, or put on any robes. I'm sure that I look like any average muggle in my plain blue dress. Other than my engagement ring (wearing it has become wishful thinking on my part), I don't even have any jewelry.

"I didn't- I couldn't," I admit.

Teddy gestures for me to sit down beside him on his sofa. "Why not?"

How am I supposed to answer that question? _Because I told Simon that I love you, and I'm not even sure whether or not that's true. _

"Simon and I got into an argument," I start, twisting my engagement ring absentmindedly. "Things ended…badly."

An alarmed look passes Teddy's face. "What do you mean, _badly_?" I feel like Teddy wants me to say that Simon did something terrible to make him look bad, but he didn't. Things with Simon weren't like they were with Holden. It was all my fault.

"I don't know if we're still going to get married," I admit sadly.

It angers me that Teddy looks a bit hopeful to hear this. What should I have expected? "Why not?"

I sigh. "We...we got into an argument."

"Over what?"

I can't look at Teddy. "Over how I felt about you…." I confess.

Teddy's silent for a long while. I can't tell what he thinks. He runs a hand through his turquoise hair. "How _do_ you feel?" He questions.

"I don't know," I admit. I know I told Simon that I loved Teddy. But I didn't do that consciously. Teddy is extremely important to me, but he_ isn't _the man I want to marry. "Teddy, you have to understand this isn't easy."

"What isn't?" Teddy questions. He sounds childlike.

I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I have to be honest. "Teddy, I _do_ love you, and I don't think that there can ever be a part of me that _doesn't _have feelings for you. But, I can't be with you forever. You and I both know that. We've hurt too many people, and ruined too much," I tell him seriously.

Teddy looks confused. He glances at the television, then back at me. "Belle, I told you that it didn't matter to me-"

"That's selfish, Teddy!" I snap. "I can't _be_ with you, don't you get that? It wasn't fair to Holden, or Victoire, and it isn't fair to Simon. It's not fair to me, either!"

"How is that not fair to you, Belle? At least I actually care about you!" Teddy argues.

"And because you do, you're set on believing everyone else doesn't! Teddy, if you cared for me as much as you say you do, you'd want me to be happy no matter whom I chose to be with. Whether it was you or not."

Teddy shakes his head. "It's not that easy. You don't know what it's like," he assures me dejectedly.

He's right. I don't know what it's like to be hopelessly in love with someone who cares for someone else, but I can imagine it's a terrible feeling.

"I know that you deserve better," I tell Teddy comfortingly, looking him in the eye.

"So do you."

"Don't tell me that. Teddy, I love Simon. I _need_ Simon. You don't understand. Simon treats me as an _equal_. I need someone like that, to challenge me, to see through me when necessary. You and I don't have that."

Teddy looks like he wants to argue, but he knows that he can't. Simon doesn't patronize me. _Ever._

"I don't want you to turn into one of them," Teddy admits quietly, looking down.

"Teddy, what do you-_ oh,_" I realize in a small voice. "You know me better than that. I won't ever be like that. If anything, I felt I was rubbing off on Simon, if only a little bit. I had plans for our relationship, some things in his family needed to be different," I admit.

I don't know how Teddy is going to take this. Saying it even surprises me. When I was with Holden, I was a_fraid_ of the future. With Simon, everything felt tangible and real.

"Plans?" Teddy half croaks.

I nod. "Yes, plans. I wanted to help him remodel his house- he says it reminds him too much of his wife. And I wanted to spend time with his nephews; Simon's brother and his wife seem to not care for them at all. It's very sad."

"You're too good for him," Teddy mutters. I wish he would stop saying things like that.

"No, I'm not. I just care about him is all. And if I could find a way to apologize to Simon and have him actually listen to me, I know things would get better."

Teddy and I fall silent for an uncomfortable while. I know he's secretly hoping that things _don't_ get better between Simon and me. Why won't he just come outright and say so?

"I thought we had a chance," Teddy tells me all of the sudden. "The other day at the quidditch match, when we were talking, I felt like you and I had something again."

Why can't Teddy let me go? "I told you I had feelings, too. I'm admitting that. But, I'd think I'd rather wonder what _could_ have been than to actually find out. I just don't want that again."

I don't mean to hurt Teddy, but the look of absolute pain on his face makes me feel like a monster.

"Belle…" Teddy reaches out to caress my cheek. I nearly recoil at his touch.

"I mean it, Teddy. This-this isn't what I want," I stammer. Still, I can't find it in myself to move away.

"I know, Belle. But I just have to kiss you one more time, okay?" Teddy pleads.

It seems like such an inappropriate thing to ask, but is it really? Teddy only asked to kiss me again, and nothing more. I certainly won't let it evolve into anything more. After all we've been through together, maybe some sort of closure is a good thing.

"Okay," I agree quietly. "One kiss."

Just after I manage to get the words out, I find Teddy's lips on mine, slow and soft at first, but then as if he'd have died if her could never kiss me again. His fingers run through my hair, drawing me closer to him. I drape my arms over Teddy's shoulders, bringing him closer to me as if he himself were a lifeline. This is more than a kiss. This is me saying goodbye to any chance of forming a relationship with Teddy again. It's a door that I have to close. I _have _to end things with Teddy.

I hear a strangled sound, a mix between a scream and I gasp. I pull away from Teddy to see a completely horrified Victoire, holding a cardboard box filled with what seem to be Teddy's things. Mouth gaping open, Victoire drops the box, and items spill out of it. The fire place is still roaring with acid green flames.

"Wh-what the hell is this?" Victoire demands, shaking her head in disbelief.

I don't know what to say. I'm stuck, sitting beside Teddy on the sofa and looking at him like an idiot.

Teddy stands quickly, holding his hands up in a placating gesture. "Look, Victoire, I can explain-"

"There's nothing to explain, Teddy!" Victoire shrieks. "I come to bring you back the things you left at you flat and I see _this?_ Isobelle is your cousin!"

Victoire glares daggers at me. Now, she has a legitimate reason to hate me.

Teddy sighs. "…'Toire-"

"_Don't _call me that!" Victoire snaps harshly. "I should have known, you two were always so close. You cheated on me, didn't you? _Didn't_ you?" Victoire's hands are trembling with rage. I wish I could say something to fix things, but I can't.

Teddy not saying anything is answer enough for Victoire. Her eyes well up with tears and for the first time in my life, I pity her. "Why did you have to do that?" she questions. "I _never_ gave you a reason to do this!"

"You didn't care about me!" Teddy says. "Everything was always about _you_!"

Victoire scoffs. "So, to get away from that, you decide to snog some idiotic, self-important, spoiled alcoholic? Don't act so surprised, Teddy, that's what _you _called her! Don't you remember?"

I look up at Teddy. Even in his anger, that doesn't sound like something he would say.

"I never said that," Teddy says, his jaw clenched.

Victoire laughs, but there isn't any happiness behind it. "Fine, lie to dear little Isobelle like you lied to me! I honestly don't care. I just hope you're happy together."

"We-we aren't together," I say in a small voice. I'm not sure whether or not this will help things. "Victoire, I'm sorry."

Victoire doesn't want to hear it. "Save it. Just because Holden dumped your pathetic ass doesn't give you the right to go snogging whoever the _hell _you please!" she shouts, jabbing a threatening finger at me.

"It didn't happen that way," Teddy says, coming to my defense. "And you and I aren't together anymore. Whatever I do isn't your problem."

Victoire narrows her eyes at Teddy. "You're a disgusting piece of shit."

I can see the well-masked look of anger in Teddy's eyes. "You know, you're not really in the position to name-call."

Victoire silently glares at Teddy. Then, she rears her hand back and gives him a hard slap across the face. "Don't speak to me or my family again," she says before disapparating.

I feel terrible for Teddy, but part of me wants to tell him he brought this on himself. I told him that he needed to break up with Victoire sooner. He should have listened.

* * *

I knock on the door to Scorpius' room. "Come in," he calls from the other side. I open the door to see him and Rose sitting cross-legged on his bed, playing a game of wizard's chess. It's been a while since I've seen them getting along this way. Scorpius has a small smile on his face.

"Hey, Isobelle," Scorpius says distractedly, moving a chess piece. It smashes Rose's castle to bits.

"Bollocks," she curses. "Every time."

"Hey, you two."

"Do you need one of us?" Scorpius questions expectantly. I actually wanted to ask him about Astoria's funeral. I know Dad probably hasn't cared to say anything to him, and if Scorpius feels the need to talk, I want to let him know that I'm here for him.

"No, I was just coming to say hello," I lie.

"Where did you go earlier?" Rose asks curiously. I'd rather not be reminded.

"Out."

Scorpius waggles his eyebrows. "To see Simon?" he asks. Neither of them knows the truth yet. No one in my family does. I don't want to hear any I-told-you-so's from Mum.

"Then where did you go?" Rose questions again. Why is it so important?

"I told you, I went out."

" 'Out' can be a lot of places," Scorpius points out accusingly.

"Oh, won't you two come off it already?"

Scorpius shrugs. "Fine, fine. No more questions. Rose, you suck."

Rose punches our brother in the arm. "Shut up. We're pretty neck-and-neck."

I decide to leave them be for the time being. "Where's everyone else?"

"Dad's in his study working," Rose answers. "Mum is upstairs getting the laundry, and Hugo and Nina are somewhere playing."

"Oh, well, I suppose I'll say hello to them. I think dinner's going to be ready soon, so be sure to finish up your game. We don't need a repeat of what happened last time the two of you left the chest pieces out."

Both Rose and Scorpius smile sheepishly. "We caught them all before they destroyed anything," Scorpius argues lightly.

"Still, just put them away, all right?"

"Fine," Rose complies.

I shut the door after them and turn to go down the hallway. A little giggling body flies past me, nearly knocking me off my feet.

"Nina!" I call, just before Hugo dashes past me. "Quit running up here, both of you, before you slip and break your necks."

"That's not gonna happen," Hugo assures me.

"Yeah, we're just playing tag," Nina adds.

"I understand that, but Dad doesn't want the two of you running up here for good reason. You could seriously hurt yourselves, especially so close to the stairs."

Nina sticks her fists on her hips, making her look exactly like Rose. "We're not going to get hurt!" She protests. "And Daddy said we could play whatever game we wanted as long as we were quiet."

Hugo nods beside Nina, and I can't help but smile at my younger siblings. "Nina, I could hear you laughing from a mile away," I assure her. "Just be careful, all right?"

"Okay!" Nina and Hugo say in unison. Not a second later, she turns and runs off, followed by Hugo. It's as if I said nothing.

Mum pokes her head out of the door of Hugo's room, frowning. "Georgina Alexandra Malfoy, are you running in this house?" She questions dissaprovingly.

Nina cringes at hearing her full name. She stops in her tracks and shakes her head vehemently. "No, Mummy," she answers.

"I think your father and I have told you numerous times not to run in this house. You could get hurt," Mum reminds her. "And Hugo, stop chasing your sister. Don't think I didn't see you, either."

"Sorry Mum," Hugo apologizes guiltily.

"I told the two of you," I say triumphantly. "You especially, Georgina."

Nina frowns at me and takes Hugo's hand. "We're gonna go play a different game," she decides.

"That's fine by me, as long as it doesn't involve running. Dinner's going to be ready soon. The house-elves are cooking tonight," Mum says resignedly.

"Kay, Mummy," Nina says, ushering Hugo off.

My eyebrows rise. "Not you?" Mum's usually so adamant about doing all the cooking herself. If she's allowing the house-elves to make dinner, then something must have happened.

Mum shakes her head bitterly. "I just don't have time for it today, Isobelle. Between talking with Scorpius and having to do so much laundry, the afternoon's really gotten away from me."

"Talking to Scorpius?" I question. "About what?"

Mum looks to make sure Hugo and Nina are out of earshot. "His mother," she tells me.

I can't help but frown. Since when has Scorpius talked to Mum about Astoria? "What about her?"

"It wasn't anything terribly particular. He told me a little bit about how the funeral service went," Mum says. "I think he just needed someone to talk to and get a bit off his chest."

It should have been me that Scorpius talked to. I was too busy caught up in Teddy.

"What did he say?" I ask.

Mum looks like she doesn't want to tell, and I briefly fear that she won't. I'm thankful she's being civil toward me again. "Scorpius apologized to me for behaving the way he did, and he'll begin treating me like his actual mother again. I think he's just lonely."

"Lonely?" I repeat. "But he's got-"

"Admitted none of us really understand what Scorpius is going through, not even Draco," Mum sighs. Of course, Dad doesn't understand. Until I came about, he didn't have any real conflicts with his family.

"I try my best," I inform Mum. There's just so much going on in my life at the moment that I feel my relationship with my family is beginning to suffer because of it.

"I know you do, Isobelle, and Scorpius knows, too. He really does look up to you."

I can't imagine why. I haven't done anything yet that Scorpius- or any of my siblings- should be proud of.

Subconsciously, I glance down the hall in the direction of Scorpius' room. "Thank you for talking to him," I say quietly.

Mum seems rather confused that I'm thanking her for this. She doesn't know how important Scorpius' well-being is to me. "Scorpius is my son," she reminds me, glancing at her watch. "You got home rather late this afternoon."

"I went to Flourish and Blotts," I lie quickly. Mum stares at me for a long while. If she doesn't believe me, she doesn't say so.

"You should have taken Rose, she's been begging Draco and I for days."

"I…" my voice trails off, grappling for a response. "I wanted to go by myself, to clear my head."

Mum gives me an understanding look, knowing I'm talking about the day of the quidditch match. Only she doesn't know how horribly it ended. "Are you all right, Isobelle?" she questions earnestly.

I nod. "I'm fine. I spoke to Teddy. He knows that things are over between us. He accepts that." I don't know how much of that statement, if any of it, is true.

"That's a good thing," Mum says in a forced tone, making a point to ignore the elephant in the room. I'm glad she doesn't want to talk about Simon either.

"Yes, it is."

Mum clears her throat. "I'm going downstairs to see about dinner."

"All right." Mum turns and goes downstairs, not saying another word. For a long while, I stand there with my hand rested on the banister and watch her go. I realize she didn't even make a point to question me in any detail, or argue with me. Does she know something I don't, or has she just decided to allow me to make my own choices?

A loud explosion sound jars me out of my thoughts, followed by heavy footfalls. "Mummy!" Nina shrieks. "Hugo burned me with the cards!"

"No, I didn't! It was an accident!" Hugo says, coming quickly after her. "Stop being a tattle-tale!"

"Mum said _not _to run!" I chastise them both, not bothering to turn around. Their footsteps come closer and heavier, and I know that they're ignoring me. They're wearing my nerves thin. Someone's going to get hurt.

"Did you not hear what I said?" Just as I turn, Nina sidesteps Hugo and runs around me down the stairs. Just before he's able to stop himself, Hugo's body slams full-force into mine, causing my hand to slip from the bannister. I stumble backwards, finding no place for my foot and no ground beneath me. I reach for anything to stabilize me but there's nothing but stone stairs beneath me as I fall. It seems to be almost endless.

"Belly!" Nina gasps, watching in horror. This is _her _fault.

This is it. This is where I die. I'm disturbingly reminded of the time I fell from the tree in the backyard and broke my arm. There's no way I'm surviving this with only a broken bone, if even at all.

I can only manage to scream, even though I know it won't help anything. I hit my head and everything goes black.

* * *

***(A/N: This is why your parents say not to run in the house! **** Hope you all enjoyed the chapter. Again, I'm going to briefly explain how Belle and Teddy are related, there seems to be confusion about that. They're second cousins, meaning two generations between them until they share common ancestors (Cygnus and Druella Black). And, personally, I do like Teddy and Isobelle as friends, really, I do, but I just don't find their personalities compatible. It's very interesting and great to see how all of you have your own opinions of that, it makes my character even feel more real to **_**me!**_** Anyway, thanks for reading! Leave a review!)**


	30. Hope Here Needs a Humble Hand

***Harry Potter belongs forever and 'Always' to J.K. Rowling! **

***Thanks for reading and encouraging my writing! It means a lot!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Black Flies' by Ben Howard**

***Yesterday, I got a PM from a reader asking if they could put my story on their blog. It doesn't bother me if you post my stories online AS LONG as I'm credited for them. If you want to, just contact me. If it's not for some crazy reason I'll pretty much say yes **

***Thank you all for reading! Leave a review!**

* * *

Death seemed preferable. My entire body was filled with sharp pains, so much so that lying on an overstuffed hospital bed was uncomfortable. Even with my limited range of motion, every move I could half-way manage sent a needle-sharp pain coursing through my veins. I couldn't bring myself to actually cry, but tears welled up in my eyes. The pain was unbearable.

Upon waking up (which was two days after my fall, the mediwitch informed me), it took me twenty minutes to actually look at myself. I'm no good at seeing injuries and knew that I'd vomit if I looked half as bad as I felt. I was correct.

"Oh, dear," the mediwitch gasps sympathetically as I fill yet another one of the sterile white hospital buckets with the contents of my stomach. "Has the morning sickness been going on long?"

It's at least noon, and I've only recently woken up. I have no idea what morning sickness is supposed to mean. The grotesqueness of my injuries is what's making me sick. There are almost no parts of my body that aren't covered in horrible green-purple bruises. Some seem to be faded to the best of their ability. I'm sure there's only so much that can be done at this point. The stairs at Malfoy Manor are a complete death-trap. Me being me, I had to manage to be the first in the family to fall. Well, I didn't fall- I was _pushed._ But still, it was _me_ in the hospital bed and my family outside worrying. This scenario was all too familiar to me.

A knock comes from the other side of the door just as the mediwitch helps me take a sip of water from a glass. "I hope you don't mind we told your family that you've waken up."

"No," I say slowly, then instantly regret it. The muscles in my neck ache. I wince and the mediwitch gives me a sympathetic look. She steps back as the door opens and my family rushes in. I try not to look so much in pain. After all, they've been worrying about me for going on three days. It's the least I can do.

"Belly!" Nina cries, running toward me.

"Don't touch her," Scorpius reminds Nina in a resigned voice. I feel sorry for him. How many times has he come to see me in the hospital now? Too many for me to not feel guilty.

"I won't," Nina says quietly, coming to the edge of the bed so that her face is level with mine. "I'm sorry, Belly! Me and Hugo didn't mean it!" She apologizes, about to cry.

"We are sorry" Hugo agrees, equally upset. "We aren't ever running in the house again and we're _always_ going to listen to what you tell us. Swear!"

I try my best to give my siblings a smile. It comes out as more of a grimace.

"How are you feeling?" Rose questions, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Scorpius, whom I know most likely won't say anything to me. He never can at times like this.

"Better," I answer in a labored voice.

"You look much better," Mum tells me in what I assume is a helpful tone. The stress and worry is apparent on her face.

"Thanks." I try to sit up straighter, so my family doesn't have to see me all bruised and battered _and_ with poor posture. A whimper escapes my lips. Dad hasn't said anything the entire time, but the well-masked look of anguish on his face guts me. Having seentheexpression so many times as a child, I can read straight through it. I can deal with the pain of closing my eyes if it means I don't have to see his face.

"Are you tired?" Rose asks.

"No."

"Do you need anything? Is there something I can get you?" Mum asks. What can I possibly need at a time like this?

"Champagne w-would be nice," I say quietly, trying again to smile. It seems like a small favor to pay Mum to humor her, if even a little bit.

"Absolutely _no_t! Not in your condition," The mediwitch interjects, giving me a stern look.

"Kidding…."

The corners of Mum lips turn upward, if only a little bit. "Oh, Isobelle," she mutters, squeezing Dad's hand. His expression doesn't change.

"What's that?" Nina questions as she points to the needle in my left arm.

"Pain potions." Or what are _supposed_ to be pain potions. They're terribly weak, and I'm in a lot of pain.

"I don't think they're working," Hugo observes.

"There's probably only so much that can be done for falling down a flight of stone stairs," Rose tells him. The mediwitch nods her agreement. "And breaking lots of bones."

My eyebrows rise in hopes that someone will answer my unasked questions. When I fell, I understood the inevitability of breaking bones, if not dying altogether. But which ones, I still haven't been told.

"Two of your ribs are still mending, sweetie," the mediwitch tells me. "Right side. Such a fright, so dangerously close to your abdomen."

I don't know what she means nor do I have the energy to ask.

"When is Isobelle able to come home?" Mum questions, taking my next unasked question from me.

"I can't tell you for certain at the moment," the mediwitch begins. Mum's face noticeably falls. Dad doesn't seem in the least bit surprised. "But she will have to stay for the next couple days, just to monitor her. Everything seems to be all right now, but we'd like to be certain."

Everything _seems_ all right? What else could go wrong? Could my ribs not heal? That's impossible, considering SkeleGro is inarguably one of the ingredients in the cocktail of potions seeping into my arm.

"I understand," Mum says resignedly. "By Thursday, then?"

"They don't know," Dad reminds her in a low voice. "They never do."

If the mediwitch hears Dad, she doesn't acknowledge him.

I decide to focus on Scorpius, who looks as uncomfortable as I've seen him in the past couple weeks. Having a mother who just died from sickness, I'm sure St. Mungo's is the last place he wants to be. I wonder if he was secretly preparing for _my_ funeral until he heard that I would be all right. Yet again, this was a time I could not be there for Scorpius. Will he tell Mum how all this made him feel when he got home? Will he _ever_ tell me?

Scorpius bites his lip and looks away from me. Rose comfortingly places her arm around his shoulder. The only solace I have in this entire situation is that for once I didn't put myself in the hospital. I want to apologize to Scorpius, but I know he won't say anything back to me.

I hear arguing from the other side of the door. It sounds like a woman and a very angry and insistent man. I'd know that voice anywhere.

The door bursts open, and I hear the faint cry of another mediwitch saying "Sir, you _need _to sign in!" The man doesn't sign in. He just looks at me.

Simon Montague is at the foot of my bed.

The immediate twinge of pain in my chest isn't from falling down stairs. It's from seeing Simon again, even if I can't look anymore terrible. He doesn't say anything to me. What can he say? The last time we spoke, he said he never wanted to see me again. Now, here he is in all his handsome, blond-stubbled chin and uncombed-hair glory. It's easily apparent that he hasn't slept. How long has he known?

"We'll be in the waiting room should you need us," Dad says, gesturing for Mum to leave and not seeming the least bit surprised. _He_ must have told Simon about me. My siblings each take turns bidding me goodbye for the time being before finally leaving. Scorpius just lowers his chin in my direction.

Simon and I are now alone except for the mediwitch, who seems to very well hate my family. I can't so easily move out of my sitting position, so I wait for Simon to do something first. For a while, he stares at me unblinkingly. What if he's only come to tell me that I got what I deserved? The thought makes my insides hurt even more.

Before I can process anything, Simon rushes over to me, sitting hurriedly on the side of my hospital bed. He takes my face in his hands, desperately crushing his lips to mine over and over again. It's causing me an indescribable amount of pain, but I don't want Simon to stop. If he only ever hurts me from loving me so much, I'm perfectly fine with that.

Finally, upon hearing my slight sobs, Simon pulls away from me. His breathing is heavy and his crystal eyes bore into mine. "Don't _ever_ scare me like that again," Simon says, his voice faltering. "You have no idea how I felt- what I thought…"

I can't do anything but cry, from the pain shooting into my cheek, and the hurt look on Simon's face. "Y-you said… you said…" is all I can manage, my throat seemingly punishing me for forcing it to form words.

"I know what I said. I regretted it as soon as I did," Simon tells me. I know he genuinely means it. He looks damn near broken himself and he didn't even fall down a flight of stairs.

"Me t-too," I cry. "Not Teddy… _you. _I love you_."_

"I know," Simon assures me quietly. He takes my engagement ring from the bedside table and slips it back onto my finger. When I whimper in pain, he shoots a glance at the mediwitch, daring her to tell him that he can't give me my ring back. She stays quiet.

"I was serious about wanting you to keep it," he tells me, kissing my hand gently.

"I know…" I want to tell Simon that I hadn't taken it off until my fall, but I don't have the energy. Maybe he knows.

"Only you can manage to nearly die and still look so beautiful," Simon says, moving a stray hair from my face. He sees me wince and finally restrains himself from touching me.

Simon's lie flatters me. "Oh, please…" I mutter. "I'm horrible."

"How so?" Simon questions, raising his eyebrows like I'm not covered head to toe in bruises and a needle isn't dripping potions into my arm.

"L-look at me."

"I am, and I still see your beautiful face and your beautiful brown eyes. You're very beautiful to me," Simon says sincerely.

I give a small laugh, and instantly feel it in my shitty ribs. "El… eloquent," I manage out, trying to adjust into a position that will ease the pain. No such luck.

The mediwitch clears her throat. "Miss Malfoy needs her rest," she says stiffly.

I've been unconscious for two days. How much more rest could I need? "I'm fine…" I protest.

"She's fine," Simon agrees, defending me.

The mediwitch purses her lips, seeming thoroughly annoyed with Simon and I. I sneak a quick glance at her left hand and realize she probably doesn't know what it's like to be loved the way Simon loves me. "That isn't for you to decide, I'm afraid. I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"No," I say. Simon can't leave me. Not again.

Simon turns to me. "I'm not going anywhere as long as you don't want me to," he promises me.

The mediwitch seems to be contemplating whether she wants to crack her clipboard in half or break it over Simon's head. "You don't have that option."

"Y-yes he does…"

"Yes, I very well do."

"No, you _don't_!" The mediwitch snaps. She sighs and regains her composure. "I'm terribly sorry but Miss Malfoy, for the sake of you and your son, you_ need_ your rest."

I blink at the mediwitch a few times, and then look at Simon. He's doing the same thing as me, but in reverse. "If I didn't make it clear by putting a _ring_ on finger, I'm her fiancé, and that's a bloody ridiculous joke," he snarls. My stomach finally does a happy feeling. _He's my fiancé again…._

The mediwitch frowns at Simon and I as if we're hopelessly stupid children. "Are you not aware that you're expecting, Miss Malfoy?"

"Expecting her to do what?" Simon demands. Suddenly, a look of realization dawns on his face. "Oh, fuck." He wrings his hands.

"What?" I ask, looking between Simon and the mediwitch. Something bad's happened, that's obvious. But what's worse than me being in the hospital?

The mediwitch clears her throat and faces me with an earnest expression. Damn time she acted professionally. "Miss Malfoy, I'm afraid you were unaware, but you're pregnant," she tells me.

If I hadn't hurt myself trying last time, I would have laughed again. What bullshit. Is that some sort of payback because Simon won't leave? _I'm _pregnant? As if.

"Impossible…" I mutter back, rolling my eyes. Maybe I _should_ rest. These potions aren't making me feel better, but they're apparently making me loopy as hell. Simon looks like he's actually buying into this.

"Take a look." The mediwitch holds a large black panel in front of me. On it are xerographs of what I assume are my bones, considering my name is printed at the top. It should be interesting to see what sorts of damage Hugo and Nina have done to me.

I see my arms, both of them fine except for a small piece of my left arm where the bones don't line up perfectly by a very small bit; a result of the time I broke my arm when I was fourteen. My eyes move down the panel. Two broken ribs that I already found out about. Knowing this is how I look on the inside makes me feel sick again. I smirk to myself as I glance over the image of my abdomen, the only one that moves. _Pregnant_, I scoff in my head. What utter dragonshit.

Suddenly, I have the urge to die again.

I can see it. My entire stomach is a grey color, except for a black spot in the middle. Inside, there's a tiny white spot, perhaps the size of my thumbprint, that resembles some kind of baby humanoid. I've only seen something like this one other time in my life. That was shortly after Mum found out she was pregnant with Nina. My body runs cold, and I no longer have the desire to laugh.

"It's a miracle your baby is still safe. You took a nasty fall," the mediwitch tells me, setting the panel back. In what world is _this_ a miracle?

"_N-no…"_ I almost wail. I feel the unsettling pressure rising in my chest and before I can do anything to stop myself, I've vomited on the hospital floor. Simon doesn't seem the least bit repulsed. In fact, he looks jealous that his current condition doesn't warrant him to do the same.

Without hesitation, the mediwitch cleans up the floor with her wand.

"How…?" I stammer, trying to recover. "I- no _signs_." I can't fathom my words into sentences; much less process any of this. When Mum was pregnant with Nina, she _knew_. She had feelings about it, and she threw up a lot (_not_ due to grotesqueness of injuries)_, _and she had odd hormonal behavior that I assume is normal for a pregnant person. None of that has happened to me. Both Simon and my parents asked me if I was pregnant, and I'd been so certain that _wasn't _the truth. I just didn't know.

"No two pregnancies are the same," the mediwitch tells me. "Some have symptoms earlier on than others, some have none at all."

Simon opens his mouth, then closes it, then opens it again.

"You mean to tell me you have the technology to tell us that she's having a boy after one _month_, but you can't get her out of this hospital?" He questions. I don't know who he's angry at, the mediwitch, me, or himself.

The mediwitch doesn't answer.

I'm still trying to figure out how all of this is possible. One month? Simon and I…_oh_. I'm reminded of the night of that horrible dinner with Simon's parents. What happened afterward definitely could have caused this. We were anything but careful. But it was only _once_. Weren't it for bad luck, I wouldn't have any luck.

"Should I leave you two alone to talk a minute?" The mediwitch suggests, sensing the utter shock and confusion between Simon and I.

Simon waves his hand over his shoulder, signaling for her to leave. When the door shuts behind us, I immediately burst into tears. Simon touches my hand gingerly, but doesn't say anything. I know what he's thinking.

"Is there any chance Lupin…" his voice trails off as he notices the expression on my face.

Ignoring the sharp hurt coursing through my neck, I shake my head. Simon doesn't say anything more on the subject. He probably realizes is wouldn't behoove me to lie to him. If this baby doesn't have his blond hair and blue eyes, it will be obvious.

"Sorry," I cry, wishing I could do anything right now other than exist. "_Sorry."_

"This isn't your fault," Simon says fiercely. "Don't blame yourself for this."

How can I not blame myself? The baby is inside _my_ stomach. Because of _my_ birth, Simon's parents aren't ever going to accept me or this child. _Or Simon._ And he says it isn't my fault.

I try to calm myself down. Crying is only making my chest hurt and muddling my thoughts even more. Simon seems to be in deep thought as well.

I reach out to tap his arm to get his attention. Slowly he turns to look at me. My lip trembles. "If y-you don't want… we don't have to- I can get rid of-"

"No, you _won't._" Simon says vehemently. "I won't even entertain such a disgusting thought. Perhaps this is sooner than we planned for, but a child was soon to follow regardless. "

"Your family," I say in a small voice. Simon told me that if he left me, he might be able to reconcile with his family. He seemed hopeful for that, and now it won't ever be possible.

How can Simon be calm about all of this? Of course, he has a well-paying job, and he's nearly four years older than me. We're at different places in our lives.

"But w-we aren't…." I slowly raise my left hand to Simon, reminding him that we've yet to be married. Despite our short falling out, Simon and I still didn't plan to get married for months. That's going to have to change.

"We'll get married soon, whenever you want. It will be perfect," he promises me. "That's the least you deserve."

I'm thankful that Simon's doing his best to comfort me, but I couldn't be any more frightened. Pretty much from the time I understood what had happened to me, I've lived in fear of becoming a mother ever since. Now, I don't have that choice.

Other than being able to afford it, I'm in no way prepared to be a mother, and there isn't anyone I can ask for help. I know immediately that I have to keep this a secret from Mum for as long as I possibly can. She'll be absolutely devastated when I tell her. She was only a year younger than I am now when she had me. If Mum wasn't ready for a child, then I know I'll never be. I don't want anything to happen to my child- my _son_- that happened to me.

"Love you," I whisper to Simon.

"I love you," he replies in a distracted voice, kissing my forehead. I barely feel it. I want to ask Simon what he's thinking of, but at the same time I _don't_ want to know.

"Sorry," I apologize again before I can help it.

Simon shakes his head. "No apologies, I mean it."

"Sorry." Simon smirks at me, and then I realize what I just said. "I'm sor- Merlin, I'll stop."

"Do you plan to tell your parents?" Simon asks, reading my thoughts.

"After marriage," I answer. "You?"

"Then as well," Simon agrees. His expression is still rather numb. I know he's nervous, but he's trying not to show it for me. "A son…" he mutters absentmindedly under his breath.

My head begins to hurt again, and Simon decides that maybe I should try to sleep some more. After a few embarrassing cries of pain, Simon manages to help me to lie down. Hopefully, the mediwitch can't hear me. Even if every bone in my body was broken and I was having twins, I'd still be happier without her.

I hear Simon take a seat in the chair at the other side of my hospital bed. He doesn't say anything for a while, and neither do I. I lay there with my eyes closed, trying not to focus anymore on any of my pain. When I don't, the potions seem to be working just a bit.

"I'm relieved that you're safe," Simon says in a quiet voice. He must figure I'm asleep. "I wouldn't want anyone else to be the mother of my child."

Even though I know I can't, I try to smile because Simon can't see me. He may have his less-than-desirable qualities, but I don't doubt him. If he can be this loving toward me, then he can be a great father and husband. I only hope all this won't cause him to compare himself to Eric. Simon will be _twice _the father his brother is.

I wish I could be completely happy, but I can't. Whether or not Simon's a good father, _I'm_ still going to be this baby's mother. Our families are still going to be disappointed and angry with us. And, worst of all, I won't be with my family much longer. I'll have to start my own. The thought of that hurts worse than falling down stairs.

* * *

***(A/N: Surprise! Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, I've been so excited to write it! Thought's on Belle's pregnancy? Thoughts on any reactions? Leave a review! Thanks for reading!**


	31. Worth Living if Somebody's Loving You

***J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter!**

***I've got a great friend on this site called 'Lexis9712'! Check out her new story called 'Stay With Me'!**

***Title of the chapter comes from 'Video Games' by Lana Del Rey! Love it!**

****So, since Belle's pregnant and all, I thought that I'd let you guys give me your input on what the baby should be named (it's a **_**boy**_**). If I end up choosing one of your names, I'll totally give you a shout-out and you'll get a lovely heartfelt PM **** haha!**

***Since so many of you are asking me questions about Belle's background and personal life and everything, I thought it was time to include some of my headcanons I've had, even since beginning TBAM. They'll be at the bottom of the chapter if you want to read them!**

***Leave a review!**

* * *

When I wake up again, I feel considerably better. Most of my bruises have faded drastically and I'm not in as much pain. Mostly my joints are sore, but I can deal with that. I sit up and look over at Simon. He's fallen asleep in the chair beside my bed. I don't know if I'll ever be able to look at Simon the same way again. Now, he isn't only someone that I was looking forward to having a growing relationship with, he's the father of my son. _I'm pregnant. _I'm tied to Simon forever, whether I like it or not.

I reach out to touch his shoulder. "Simon…" I whisper, shaking him gently. "Simon, wake up."

Simon stirs a bit before finally opening his eyes. He looks around a bit, taking in his surroundings. Then he sighs, probably remembering the news we got an hour ago.

"How are you feeling?" He asks immediately, taking my hand.

"A lot better," I assure him. Simon seems pleased to hear this. Still, it looks like something's bothering him. "What's wrong?"

"I hope you know that I'm not angry with you," Simon says carefully.

"I didn't think that at all."

"I really do love you. More than you'll ever know," Simon says.

"I know. I love you, too."

"I'm not ever going to leave you."

"I know."

Simon doesn't say anything for a long while. I think he's still too stunned. "Jane was only a year older than you when she had her children," he tells me. I think this is supposed to make me feel better. It doesn't.

"And look at her," I say miserably. "I don't want to be like that. I want to be loving and caring and-"

"You'll be all of that and more," Simon assures me.

"How can you be so sure?" I question doubtfully.

Simon tilts my chin forward with his fingers, trapping me in his beautiful blue eyes. "I know you. You _are_ caring and you _are_ loving. I'm not worried for you one bit," he assures me.

I look away from him bashfully. "What are we going to do?" I mutter. Simon seems to have all the answers, or at least be comfortable with acting like he does.

"Well, now would be a great time for us to remodel my home. You can oversee it if you'd like," Simon tells me.

"But it's _your_ home," I protest.

"It will be yours, too, soon enough," Simon reminds me.

"How could I forget?" After I say this, I notice the stiff expression on Simon's face. I hope he doesn't think I'm not looking forward to living with him. I am, I'm just nervous about it, too.

Simon purses his lips. I know he's trying his hardest to make me feel better, but he can't really do much more to comfort me at this point. "About the wedding," he starts.

"What about it?"

"When were you thinking of having it?"

I shrug slightly. "I haven't really given it much thought." Honestly, the thought of being married to Simon frightens me. I've never really known anything outside of my family. Living with someone else will be completely foreign. "I'll decide soon."

"All right."

"It's a lot to plan, and I'll have to choose robes before I get large, and flowers, and a location, and invite people. Do you think your family will come?" I ask apprehensively.

Simon shrugs. "I'm not certain. I think they will. But that isn't anything for you to worry about, or me either for that matter." How can I not worry about all this?

"It's a _lot_ to worry about! Simon, I'm nervous. What if your parents disown you because of this? I don't want that to happen to you, it isn't fair…" I cry. I know I sound like a child, but I honestly can't help it.

Simon places a calming hand on my shoulder. "Isobelle, when I told you not to worry, I meant it," he says firmly. "Whatever my parents do has nothing to do with _you_. They can do whatever the hell they please as long as I have you. Now please, _calm down._"

"Okay," I relent. "I won't say any more about it." I adjust myself in my bed and sit there for a while, quiet.

"Do you need the mediwitch to check on you?" Simon questions with a distasteful look.

"No. Are you going to work today?"

Simon shakes his head. "Not until you're better."

"Simon…"

"I can't leave you," Simon says in a firm tone. "Not like this."

"You said that already," I remind him.

"I mean it. Isobelle, you are the greatest thing that has ever happened to me," Simon tells me. I'm not sure how to reply to that, considering I'm probably also one of the largest complications in his life at the moment.

Luckily, I'm saved from having to come up with a response by a knock at the door.

"Come in."

Mum opens the door and walks in slowly. She's by herself. Immediately, Simon goes rod-straight.

"Mrs. Malfoy," he says with a small smile.

"Hello, Simon." I'm glad she doesn't have it in her right now to be biting.

"I should give the two of you some time to yourselves," Simon decides, standing up. As an afterthought, he leans down to kiss my forehead. "Feel better," he whispers before leaving. Simon shuts the door behind him.

I turn to look at Mum, who's now sitting where Simon sat just minutes before. She looks at me for a long while, and for a second I suspect that she knows something. Eventually, Mum sighs. "I see now that Simon really does care for you," she tells me. Even if she does acknowledge that, I don't think that will make her like him any more.

"He does," I agree. "He really does."

"You need someone like that."

I nod. I really do. "Where are the others?" I ask.

"Draco took them out for lunch. He deserved some time away from this place," Mum answers sympathetically.

"What do you mean?"

"Draco practically sat at your bedside day-in and day-out while you were recovering," Mum informs me. "He really hates seeing you this way."

I feel that it's unnecessary for Mum to say something like that. Who would _want _to see their daughter in the hospital?

"Not any more than Scorpius does," I say sadly.

Mum nods wistfully. She looks away as if she has to say something, but is thinking of how to say it.

"What is it?" I ask.

Mum takes a deep breath. "Draco and I had a long talk while you were sleeping…."

My heartbeat rapidly increases, which I'm sure can't be healthy right now. "What about?"

"Isobelle, I don't want my asking to upset you-" I hate it when Mum stalls.

"Just tell me, Mum."

Mum gives me an uncertain look. "I was considering adopting Scorpius," Mum tells me. I don't understand why that would upset me. That would be the perfect thing. We could be even _more_ of a family, and Scorpius won't have any more ties to Astoria's side of the family. It's a win-win situation.

I frown slightly. "That doesn't upset me…"

Mum looks uneasy. "Well, I wasn't sure how you'd take it… considering Astoria and Draco discussed doing the same for you-"

"Astoria didn't want to adopt me, she didn't want any responsibility for me. She just wouldn't say so outright so Dad wouldn't be angry with her," I inform Mum.

She nods in bitter understanding. "That's the difference. I would like full, undisputed responsibility for Scorpius. Draco believes it's a great idea. This isn't going to change how any of you are treated," Mum assures me.

I nod. "I know. But what about Grandmother and Grandfather? They aren't going to be happy with this." Grandmother and Grandfather refuse to acknowledge in any way that Mum is Scorpius' mother. This will only make the situation worse.

"It doesn't matter to me what they think," Mum says firmly. "Not a bit."

"I know. I was just saying. Still, I think you should do it. Have you spoken to Scorpius about it?"

Mum shakes her head slowly. "No, not yet. I'm not certain what he will say."

"I don't think he'll be upset about it. I mean, you're his mother in every other aspect, and Astoria is dead. Why would he have a problem with it?"

"I don't know…I just fear it," Mum says solemnly. "I don't want him to think that I'm trying to replace her, or to think I'm completely disrespecting Astoria's memory."

It speaks to me how much Mum cares and how much she is willing to do for Scorpius. I'm sure that what with me and my accident, Mum doesn't want to take the chance of not having much jurisdiction if anything like that ever happened to Scorpius. It would tear her apart.

"Don't be afraid," I say quietly, resting my hand on Mum's. It feels rather odd for me to be consoling her, but it's a rather enjoyable feeling at the same time. "Scorpius won't mind it. If he does, he'll come around eventually."

Mum nods shortly and pulls herself together. "Thank you, Isobelle."

"You're welcome." I fidget with a loose strand of my hair.

"I spoke with your mediwitch…" Mum starts vaguely.

A knot goes into my stomach. _Does she know? She can't!_ "A-and…?"

Mum breaks into a wide smile. Is she actually _happy_ that I'm pregnant? I certainly didn't expect this. "Don't be so nervous, Isobelle. I spoke to your mediwitch, and she said you can come home tomorrow," Mum informs me.

I breathe a sigh of relief. "_Oh…_ that's great," I say unenthusiastically. It isn't that I _don't_ want to go home, but I feel as if it will make things more real. Even so, I know that I'll be back in the hospital in a couple months.

"You sound upset," Mum frowns. "Is something wrong?"

I shake my head quickly. "No, everything's fine. I'm just tired, I suppose," I lie.

"Do you want me to leave so that you can rest?" Mum offers.

"No." As childish as it may sound, I don't quite want to be alone right now. I don't dare say that out loud.

"I'll stay as long as you want me to," Mum resolves.

"Thanks." Mum gives me a small smile. "I love you, Mum."

Mum pats my hair and gives me a very motherly look. "I love you, too, Isobelle. I _really _love you."

"I know." I feel like when people tell me that, I have no idea what to say back. I mean I love Mum, too, but it would seem rather perfunctory to say that back. "No matter what, right?"

"Of course, Isobelle. There isn't a thing you can do to make me stop loving you." I wouldn't be so sure of that.

* * *

"Belly, you're home!" Nina cheers, wrapping her arms around my legs. I wince in pain.

"Don't squeeze her," Rose chastises, smiling at me as well. I try my best to smile back. I'm happy to be home, I really am, but I know Malfoy Manor won't be my home much longer.

"Lunch is ready. Dad had all your favorites made," Hugo tells me, pointing to the back door. As soon as we got home, Mum went outside to talk to Dad, presumably about Scorpius.

"Great, I am rather hungry. I haven't had any real food in nearly three days."

"Dad said to come out when we're ready," Scorpius says in a quiet voice. I still don't think he's gotten over me being in the hospital. Now, I'll have to leave him permanently.

"Then I'm going to go now," I decide, crossing the room to open the back door. Mum and Dad instantly turn to look at me.

"Welcome home," Dad says with a forced smile. He seems distracted.

"Thanks." My siblings rush past me and all take seats at the dining table outside. I sit down in between Scorpius and Dad. Scorpius pushes his food around with his fork.

"I'm glad you're okay," he says finally, not looking at me.

I know that's progress, so I'm not too picky. "Thanks. I am, too."

"I know_ Simon's_ happy," Rose smirks. "The way he dramatically rushed into the hospital to see you, it was like it was out of a book or something. How romantic…"

"Rose," Dad chastises. "Isobelle, just came home and the least you could do is not make fun of her."

"I'm just trying to keep things normal. Isn't that what we're supposed to do whenever-"

"_Rose." _Dad meets Rose's eye and she stops talking. I know what they're talking about. This is the normal 'Let's behave like everything is normal when Isobelle comes out of the hospital so she doesn't feel out of place' routine. I hate every second of it.

"Sorry," Rose apologizes. "So, um, when are you and Simon getting married again? This winter?"

I feel as if it's gotten twenty degrees hotter outside. I wipe my mouth slowly with my napkin. "Possibly sooner than that."

Mum seems to be having an internal struggle between getting angry and trying to remain calm. "How soon?"

Before I can answer, Nina gets my attentions. "Belly, will you cut me a piece of strawberry cake?" She asks sweetly, gesturing to the cake near me on the table. I pick up my knife, ready to oblige her and get the conversation off of me.

Dad holds out his hand to stop me. "Nina, finish eating first, then you may have some cake. Isobelle, I believe your mother asked you a question."

"Did she?" I ask slowly.

"I did," Mum nods. "How soon are you and Simon getting married?"

Everyone's staring at me. I can't lie, because I _will_ want them at my wedding. "…A month, possibly. Before Rose and Scorpius go back to school, at least."

Dad frowns slightly. "Why so soon?"

"Simon and I love each other," I say simply. "What would be the point of waiting if we're going to spend the rest of our lives together anyway?"

Mum purses her lips. "Isobelle, you can't plan a wedding in a month. It just can't happen."

"Why couldn't I?" I'm having reservations myself, but this is for my son.

Mum wrinkles her eyebrows. "There are so many things you have to do-"

"I know. Simon and I have talked about it. It's what we want to do. Besides, if it's a summer wedding, it won't be snowing and we can have it outside. That will be nice, won't it?"

"Yeah," Nina agrees, shoveling forkful after forkful of food into her mouth. Merlin, she really wants some cake.

"We go back to school September first," Scorpius reminds me. "That really isn't a lot of time."

"It isn't much, but it's going to be enough," I assure him. "Why are all of you so upset about this?"

Dad speaks up first. "Isobelle, I don't disagree at all with you marrying Simon, but it seems you and Simon are rushing. You said so yourself: the two of you and Simon are going to have years to spend together."

"I didn't say that. I said we're going to spend the _rest_ of our lives together, and who knows how long that is? My accident really put things into perspective for me. I don't want to waste any more time," I explain tightly. Part of that statement is true. I do want to be with Simon the rest of my life. I want to have a family with him and be happy.

"Waiting doesn't necessarily mean you're wasting time," Mum says reasonably. "Isobelle, don't be irrational."

"I'm _not_ being irrational," I protest. "Simon and I just want to be together and start our lives. What's wrong with that?"

Mum opens her mouth then closes it. "There isn't anything wrong with that. I know you and Simon love each other. I understand that completely, but-"

"But?" I ask.

"I just don't understand how you can make a decision like this in only a few days. How can you be positive this is what you want?" She asks me.

It doesn't really matter what I want any more. I'm no longer only responsible for making decisions for myself. "This _is _what I want. I also want you all to support me, but if you don't, there isn't anything I can do about that."

"We never said we didn't," Scorpius mutters under his breath. "I mean, I like Simon, but-"

"But we like_ you_, too," Hugo finishes with a sad expression. Rose and Nina nod. "If you marry Simon, you have to go."

I purse my lips. My siblings are making this much harder for me. "I understand that. But, I'm much older than all of you. I can't stay forever," I remind them. "I've been here much longer than all of you already."

"But when you marry Simon, you two can live _here! _We have lots of room!" Nina suggests happily, as if this is the perfect solution.

"Merlin they can't do that, that's weird!" Rose says dismissively.

"I'm afraid Rose is right," I agree. "When Simon and I get married, I'm going to go live with him."

"That isn't fair!" Nina pouts, crossing her arms.

"It isn't like you won't ever see me again," I reason. "I'm going to live with Simon, I'm not leaving England. He lives just outside of Wiltshire; it's not even that far away."

Nina shakes her head at me, refusing to listen. "Everyone gets to know you but _me_!" she whines. Scorpius cringes at her high-pitched voice.

"Nina," I say, trying to calm her down. "I'm sorry, but that's how things work since I'm much older than you. I wish it were different, but I'm sorry, it can't be. You know I don't _want _to leave you."

"But you still are!" Nina cries. "Belly, nobody loves me but you and Hugo and if you go, it will just be Hugo!"

Mum puts her hand to her mouth in horror. I know how hurt she is to hear Nina say something like that. Even though Mum is continuously questioning me, I _do_ want to defend her. She deserves that.

"Nina, you know that isn't true," I say calmly.

Nina bobs her head violently up and down. "Yes it is! Mummy and Daddy never talk to me unless they're telling me to stop doing things! Scorpius and Rose are mean to me and call me stupid! Only Hugo is nice to me and he doesn't even talk to me a whole lot! I most of the time have to play by myself and only you care!"

"We _all_ care for you," I tell Nina. Right now, she's inconsolable. It really hurts me that I have to see her this way. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel that my family sometimes overlooks Nina because she's on a different level than us. It's not her fault.

Nina slams her hand on the table, making the silverware shatter. She may not be a true Malfoy, but she sure as hell has a temper like one. "No you don't! I don't want to be part of this family anymore!" Nina hops down from the table.

"Nina!" Dad calls.

"Don't ever talk to me again!" Nina shrieks before slamming the door.

Scorpius and Rose seem unfazed for the most part. They're horrible to Nina, and they couldn't care less. They only see her as a stupid younger sibling. Only Hugo seems to regret his actions. Granted, he's very nice to Nina, but he does ignore Nina sometimes in favor of Scorpius.

"I was never that terrible to _either _of you," I tell Rose and Scorpius in a harsh tone. "Nina being younger than you doesn't mean she doesn't have feelings." Neither of them says anything. I can't even look at them right now.

Both my parents look stunned. I know how much it bothers Dad to think that any of us feels like he's failed to be a good father. Mum's the same way. I hope I won't be.

Mum stands up abruptly. "I'm going to go speak to her," she decides.

I stand up, too. "No, I think I should do it. Please."

Mum doesn't look happy about it, but she takes her seat again. "Thank you, Isobelle," she says in a defeated tone.

"You don't have to thank me." Nina's my sister. I'm supposed to be there for her and make her feel better, no matter how young she is. I open the back door and go inside, I don't hear anything, so I figure Nina must be in her room. I go up the stairs quickly, taking care to hold onto the banister, before Nina has the time to do anything crazy.

"Nina," I call, walking down the hallway. "Nina."

I hear sniffles coming from the opposite side of the door to her room. I put my hand on the door knob to open it, but it's locked.

"Nina, you know you aren't supposed to lock the door," I say calmly.

"I don't care! Go away!"

I take my wand out of my robes and hold it to the lock. "Alohomora." The lock clicks open, and I enter Nina's room. I'll never get used to its blinding pinkness.

"No fair, you used magic!" Nina whines. She's got her back turned to me, standing over her bed. Her pink trunk is open, and she's filling it with various items such as robes, stuffed animals, and fairy wings.

"What are you doing?" I question, coming to sit on Nina's window seat and watch her fill her trunk.

"Running away," Nina answers in an angry voice. "I never want to see anybody again!"

Nina rummages through her closet and takes out a set of finger-paints. She places them into her trunk. At least she'll have something to occupy her while she's gone.

"You're running away?" I ask matter-of-factly.

"For _forever_!"

"That's an awfully long time. You won't be able to fit into your clothes after a while," I remind her.

Nina turns around and glares at me. "I'm bringing my Pygmy Bank I got from Aunt Ginny! I'll buy all _new_ clothes!" she informs me.

"You're going to get hungry."

"I already told the house-elves to make me snacks!" Nina snaps.

"What if you eat them all? Or they spoil?" I ask, tapping my finger to my chin.

Nina rubs her hand down her face in frustration then groans. "Stop asking me questions!" She orders angrily.

I stretch my feet out, handing Nina a pillow so that she can take it with her if she chooses. "I'm going to miss you when you leave," I tell her.

Nina shrugs. "I'm gonna miss _you_, and you're still gonna leave," she reasons.

"But I'm going to be with Simon. You're going to be all by yourself," I remind her.

"I don't care!" After adding a few storybooks (and lamenting over how she'll now have to read herself to sleep at night), Nina finally flips her trunk lid closed. Try as she might, she can't get it to shut. I can see her visibly debating whether or not she should ask me for help.

"I can shut it for you," I offer.

"Fine," Nina relents. "Then I'm leaving."

I stand up and try to close to lid of Nina's trunk. It won't budge. "It's never going to close if you've just got everything thrown in here. You've got to lay things down in a more organized way."

Nina seems confused. "Can't you use magic and fix it? I wanna go _now."_

"But you won't have magic when you're out on your own, so you'll have to learn these things," I remind Nina. I take out her sloppily folded robes and fairy wings. "Your trunk's never going to close like this," I tell her again.

Nina rolls her eyes impatiently. "Hurry."

I reach into Nina's trunk and feel something hard wrapped inside one of her flowery scarves. "What's this?" I ask, pulling it out.

"It's private," Nina says testily. "Belly, put it back!"

"I just want to see it," I say.

Nina doesn't seem to like this. "No, it's_ mine_!" she shrieks, tugging on the scarf. Something falls out of it and hits the floor with a loud _thud._ I stoop to pick it up. It's a picture frame. I turn it over to see a picture of Nina and me. It's from around two years ago. I'm grinning and holding Nina against my hip in one arm, pointing and trying to get her to look at the camera with the other. Nina is staring at something else, smiling and holding a bundle of balloons. It's her fourth birthday.

"Nina…" I say, touching the photograph lightly. "Were you going to take this with you?"

Nina nods. "It's my favorite picture," she tells me quietly. Her lower lip begins to tremble. "I don't really want to leave and I don't want you to leave me!" she cries.

I bend down on my knees to hug her. "Nina, no one's making you leave," I tell her, rubbing her hair. "Mum and Dad care about you, and so do Hugo, and Scorpius and Rose. Even though they don't show it sometimes. And I know they'll miss you just as much as I will."

Nina shakes her head like she doesn't believe me. "No they won't. If you go, then I don't wanna stay, either," she tells me.

"It will be fine, Nina. I'll come to see you whenever you want, I promise. It will be just like during the rest of the year, when Dad has to go away sometimes to different countries for work. You still see him all the time, don't you?"

Nina sniffles and nods reluctantly. "You'll still see me, too. Even more than that," I promise her.

Nina's blue eyes shine with hope. "I will?"

"Of course. And there's still a whole entire month left until Simon and I get married. You're going to have so much fun at our wedding. It will be like one of Blaise's mother's weddings, only you'll get to be in it. And you'll get to wear beautiful robes and have lots of flowers…"

Nina seems partially excited for this. "Okay but then after, you have to see me all the time. Swear?"

I nod my head. "Yes, I swear I'll come to visit you _very_ often. Now will you do something for me?"

"What?" Nina asks.

"Unpack all these clothes and come finish eating."

Nina shakes her head. "I don't want to go outside with them right now."

"You still need to eat," I tell her.

"Can we eat up here? Please, Belly?" Nina begs clasping her hands together. Usually, we aren't allowed to eat in our rooms. But right now, I'm sure some rules can be broken, especially for Nina.

"I suppose we can have whatever you told the house-elves to make so it doesn't go to waste. What _did_ you ask for?"

"Strawberry cake and ice cream," Nina answers.

I frown in confusion at my sister. "You can't run away and survive off cake and ice cream. Besides, the ice cream would melt," I tell her.

"But I wanted it," Nina protests, beginning to take things out of her trunk. I smile at my adorable younger sister. If she wants something, what should be in the way of her having it? I suppose we have a very sugary lunch ahead of us.

* * *

***Thanks for reading! Remember, I'm taking requests for Simon/ Belle's baby name! Let me know what you thought of the chapter! Also, I've got a few of my little head canons at the bottom, thought it'd be cool to include some of what goes on in my head! These are plot points I had drafts that included them, but never actually made it into the story. I thought it was time to share them, since I get a lot of questions these would answer. If you have any more questions, I will ****definitely**** answer them!**

* * *

**-Although it isn't acknowledged, Isobelle is the first girl to be born into the Malfoy family in many generations (through Lucius' bloodline, not Narcissa's)**

**-Upon her parents' demand, Hermione had already arranged for a muggle family to adopt Isobelle. Hermione believed this would best protect her from finding out who she really was but still allow her to possibly see her. She nearly followed through with this, until Narcissa came to her. **

**-Part of the reason Narcissa dislikes Isobelle is because she reminds her of Andromeda. Narcissa respected the fact that her sister stood up for what she believed in and regrets she was/is not the same way**

**-'IsObelle' isn't spelled 'IsAbelle' because Hermione believed the unique spelling would be easily identifiable if she ever encountered her daughter.**

**-Isobelle's middle name is pronounced 'Del-FEEN', **_**not**_** 'Del-FINE'. It is the feminine form of the Latin constellation **_**Delphinus, **_**or 'dolphin'. Draco wanted to Isobelle to have a constellation name like his so she would feel a part of her family, but did not want to change her first name. Hermione never gave her a middle name.**

**-Isobelle has always wanted to have blond hair since the rest of her family did growing up**

**-Teddy first fell in love with Isobelle after she tried to kill herself. He was disgusted with himself for realizing this when he did. **

**-Hermione has talked Draco into giving the house-elves certain days off. Despite this, they still don't understand what 'not having to work' means**

**-When Isobelle was 11, Draco received her Hogwarts letter. He wrote to McGonagall personally asking her not to send any more.**

**-Other than Draco (and arguably his parents), Blaise has played the largest hand in raising Isobelle. Until Draco married Astoria, Blaise often spent time at Draco's flat helping him out with Isobelle. For this reason, Isobelle feels somewhat guilty about hating Daisy. **

**-Once, when Isobelle was twelve, she and Draco got into an argument. By complete accident, he called her an 'insufferable know-it-all'. Isobelle never understood why he locked himself in his room afterwards.**

**-Because of his job, Draco sent both Isobelle and Scorpius to day school until they were six years old. He didn't have the time to teach them some of the basics, so he sent them to school. Most magical children do not go to school until it is time to attend Hogwarts. They are taught from home.**

**-Due to being with Holden and around his family for so long, Isobelle can speak a little bit of Gaelic (Holden and his family are Scottish)**

**-Isobelle is a very talented singer and dancer, but never performed due to her anxiety.**

**-Isobelle is the third shortest member of her family, only taller than Nina and Hugo (they will eventually be taller than her). She is only around 5 foot or 5 foot 1. She's shorter than both her parents. Hermione says her mother was very short. Isobelle also has a slightly pudgy build. If Isobelle ever straightened her hair, it would be slightly past her bum. **

**-Isobelle's biggest fear is the possibility that she may one day do something to cause someone she loves to abandon her**

**-Due to all having a muggle-born mother and pureblooded father, Nina, Rose, and Isobelle basically have the same face, only with slight variations to their features. The only notable differences are that Nina has blue eyes, both Nina and Rose have freckles, and Isobelle has pale skin. Hermione dislikes this because Nina and Rose remind her a lot of Isobelle before she met her.**

**-In school, Simon had the same dynamic with Holden and Teddy as Draco had with Harry and Ron. His attempts to romance Isobelle began as an attempt to put Holden down, until he actually, unintentionally fell in love with her. **

**-Isobelle donated all the money Hermione gave her to an orphanage. **

**-Hermione purposely convinced Ron to move into a house with an extra bedroom in hopes that Isobelle would one day occupy it**

**-Ginny and Ron stopped talking shortly after Hermione and Draco got together. Ginny was disgusted that Ron let his hate for Draco get in the way of spending time with his children. Ron remarried a muggle and has one child with her**

**-When Isobelle was younger, she once talked Draco into dressing as a princess. He's never mentioned it to this day, and has stuck strictly to tea parties since.**

**-Out of the younger siblings, Rose is the oldest, if only slightly. Her birthday is at the beginning of January, Scorpius' is at the end. They sometimes joke and call themselves 'twins'**

**-Despite being Ron's child, Hugo is the one Draco argues with the least. Draco is still astonished by this. **

**-As a young child, Isobelle had slightly larger front teeth. Draco worried this would be permanent until her adult teeth grew in proportionate.**

**-Isobelle isn't prejudice, but she hates muggle technology, muggle music, and muggle clothing. All the variety is overwhelming.**

**-Isobelle has never been a fan of Valentine's Day, due to the negative meaning it has for her.**

**-Scorpius has always been jealous of his siblings for having 'normal' names.**

**-Rose is top of her class, Scorpius is a close second.**

**-When Ron found out about Isobelle, he and Hermione got into such a terrible argument that he went and stayed with George for three days.**

**-When Isobelle turned seventeen, she spent the weekend with Holden in a room they rented at the Leaky Cauldron. He planned to propose to her, but never did.**

**-When Isobelle left school, Hermione and Harry helped her with her spellwork. Isobelle can't produce a patronus no matter how hard she tries. However, she is an exceptional dueler. **

**-Since her attack, Draco has taught Isobelle Occlumency. It took her over a year to learn.**

**-When Isobelle was younger, she was desperate to be just like Astoria. This is where her love for jewelry and fine clothing really came from. **

**-Astoria did try to get along with Isobelle, but found her extremely needy. It irritated her how attached she was to Draco. This contributed to her dislike for her, along with her not actually being her child.**

**-Ironically, according to my headcanon, if all of Hermione and Scorpius kids' were sorted (excluding Isobelle), the first initial of their name would match their House. (Rose Ravenclaw/ Scorpius Slytherin/ Hugo Hufflepuff/ Georgina Gryffindor). I personally feel none of them would be in the same house.**


End file.
